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LCS Chain Story


grimroxster

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iamanevilbastard

Dunno.

 

Ben-if you're reading this, I'll start the new CS tomorrow.

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How about we keep this topic for the stupid stories and use the new one for serious ones?

 

2.jack bauer pissed on tonis bed

 

Toni was shocked by the stranger who appeared to be pissing on his bed.

" Oi! What the hell man? "

Jack turned around.

" Oh, hello. "

" Stop that! "

" Stop what? "

"Stop pissing on my bed and acting like nothing is wrong! "

" But nothing is wrong. When you gotta go, you gotta go. "

" In my HOUSE?! "

" Well, yeah. I was hoping you'd be home but luckily there was an open window just above the pile of sh*t laid outside.. "

" Oh yeah, the toilet's chain didn't work one time so I threw it out the window. Anyway, continue. "

" Yes, well, I climbed in, looked for a bathroom but all the doors are shut for some reason, except for the living room and the bedroom. So I pissed on your bed. "

Toni shot Jack and took his wallet. Inside was a pilot's license. Toni got out his permanent marker, crossed out Jack's name and wrote his own name with a 5 year old's handwriting. Then he went to the airport and purchased a...

 

- Shamal

 

- Maverick

 

- Passenger jet

 

- roflcopter

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Sounds like a good idea to me, Jordy colgate.gif

 

OT:

 

Roflcopter.

"roflroflroflroflroflroflrofl..." it went as Toni started it up.

Toni lifted off the ground and instantly fell back down again, stunning him.

"The f*ck?"

"This helicopter is not a registered flying machine. Please undo your seatbelt and exit the vehicle." said a woman's voice on the GPS

"f*ck you!", Toni shouted to the voice, taking out his screwdriver. Toni unscrewed the GPS and threw it out the window.

"Who's the registered flying machine now, bitch!? YOU! HAHA!" Toni laughed insanely.

Toni took off again and flew to...

 

1. The White House.

2. The Black House.

3. The Orange House.

4. The Blue House. f*ck. Is he in Balamory?

 

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4. The Blue House. f*ck. Is he in Balamory?

He is now.

 

Toni has no clue about landing a roflcopter. It's a lot harder than landing ordinary choppers y'know. So he ended up crashing into...

 

- The black guy at the orange house

 

- That woman who's in every episode and is like a teacher and has a green house

 

- The pig (cop)

 

- That sad nerd who plays WoW, lives in a lighthouse and is pink

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hotwheels83
The pig (cop)

 

he gets 2 stars so he searchs for a car but doesnt see one!! devil.gif

so he jacks a cops car and goes to the pay n spray but the man there ............

 

1.no police cars

2.no assholes

3.resparays it

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iamanevilbastard

2.no assholes e then pulls of his mask. Its Jack-again. 'You f*cking shot me!" He yells. He then smashes Toni's head against the sterring wheel, the airbag pops out and he suffocates Toni whith it. Toni repsawns at Jacks place...weird. They then

1 Make a truce and smoke some hashish

2 Make a truce and drink some Red Bull

3 Make a truce and go pi$s on some dudes bed

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Make a truce and drink some Red Bull

 

He drinks it and gets feeling he wants piss to everyone, but he came back to Jack's house to piss in his bed, but unbelievably, Jack is alive! Toni:

 

1.Tells him how he loves Jack

2.Kills him, take wallet and pilot's license (again)

3.Tells him to drink his urinals

Troll.

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iamanevilbastard

Alright people we have a choice.

 

1-Relocate this tothe new version and pick it up there-stupid, non serious crap will be let slide but I'll have to moderate it

2-Stay here, but I still have to moderate it and it'll probably get closed down by a mod (lets just say I have some info hinting at that)

 

Basically, it'll be the same in whichever thread it is, but this one might be closed down.

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hotwheels83
Alright people we have a choice.

 

1-Relocate this tothe new version and pick it up there-stupid, non serious crap will be let slide but I'll have to moderate it

2-Stay here, but I still have to moderate it and it'll probably get closed down by a mod (lets just say I have some info hinting at that)

 

Basically, it'll be the same in whichever thread it is, but this one might be closed down.

i go for B but still if the others say then we will continue with this bored.gif

 

OT:2.Kills him, take wallet and pilot's license (again)

 

Now Toni goes to Sal and tells him that they are gonna make an attack on the columbians so they gear up on weapons.Then suddenly Sal catches his heart and says...........

 

1.Bye!! im gonna respawn!!

2.i have got a heart attack Toni take me to the hospital

3.Why dont we do the attack on the yakuza

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"I have a heart attack Toni,take me to the hospital" says Sal so he brings him to the nearest hospital.The doctor says"Glad,that you bringed him here yery fast,otherwise he´d would die.But he has to be here for a week and later when he`s out,he must not do any sudden moves."Toni says"OK" and leaves the place,but when getting outside he is greeted by...

1:Nothing,But he thinks someone has followed him and Sal all the way to hospital,so he walks away to apartment.

2:Donald,who heard about Sal`s plan so they gave a visit to 8-Ball.

3.A pissed off guy,who got run over when Toni bringed Sal hospital and his armed with a Baseball Bat!.

Edited by Karl11
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iamanevilbastard

3.A pissed off guy,who got run over when Toni bringed Sal hospitaland his armed with a Baseball Bat!. Toni just laughs, ducks under the swing, tackles him to the ground and breaks his neck. Some guy photographs the killing and walks off. Toni shoots him, but now he has to

1 Kill a few cops, because a squad car just arrived

2 Dump the bodies in the river

3 Put the bodies in a car and crush it

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Da Mavericko

It's summer!!! Let's just stick with this story, in my opinion. smile.gif

 

Toni shoots him, so he has to put the bodies in a car and crush it. He drives to the car crusher with blood leaking from under the car like when Mickey shot that O' Toodle whatever guy. He reaches there and puts the car under the magnet. Nothing happens... he waits...nothing...then he hears it!

 

"Sorry, we don't DO Sundays, dumbo." Toni twitches his right eye and was about to squash his testicles when he forgot that some guy tore one out and the other tore the other one out.

 

"SH*T!" A guy walks to him.

"DAZ MEZZED UP CUZ DA WAY YA SWEAR IS LIKE SHI$" He texted that to Toni's handphone. The General laughs in his room while having sex with his hot wife.

 

1) Toni gets to be friends with the guy who runs an international crime syndicate known as The Associates. The guy is known as DA g0dfather. g0dfather becomes BFFs with Salvatore and other peeps.

 

2) g0dfather and Toni will cross paths again...as they walk away from each other...they feel it...maybe in GTA V?

 

3) Toni was seeing illusions and just pushes the car into the sea. The Green Hands Gang boss faces him. Everybody thought he was dead...Toni almost squishes his testicles again...that guy is mad. And he is a black belt in Taekwondo. Toni forgot to bring his gun. He can't use cheats. No GOA and his soldiers. No Leone Mafia. Nothing. It's now 1 on 1...the wind is blowing from the south as the black belt delivers his first kick. To Toni's head.

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iamanevilbastard

It's winter! Holy crap, I'm almost a black belt in TKD, ha ha. But I eliminate the fancy crap.

 

Toni was seeing illusions and just pushes the car into the sea. The Green Hands Gang boss faces him. Everybody thought he was dead...Toni almost squishes his testicles again...that guy is mad. And he is a black belt in Taekwondo. Toni forgot to bring his gun. He can't use cheats. No GOA and his soldiers. No Leone Mafia. Nothing. It's now 1 on 1...the wind is blowing from the south as the black belt delivers his first kick. To Toni's head. Then the TKD blackbelt eliminates the fancy crap and throws a roundhouse to Toni's ribs, followed by a headbutt. Toni staggers backwards in pain, but the black belt continues his attack. He tackles Toni to the ground and beats the crap out of him. However, Toni's had training in ju jitsu, judo and boxing. He hooks his calf over the BBs head and pushes to the side. He ends up with him in a lock. He then gets up and delivers a swift stomp to the side of his head. The BB

1 Dies. Holy crap, he should've trained his neck better.

2 Rolls, gets up and shoots in again for a tackle. God, he's dumb.

3 Gets up, knees Toni in the crotch and goes for an eye gouge.

 

 

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hotwheels83
1 Dies. Holy crap, he should've trained his neck better.

 

Toni is preparing for the attack on the columbians and he takes 25 bombs from 8-ball.He then takes a AK-47.RPG,Minigun from ammunition.He takes some backup and goes there.There he finds out........................

 

1.everybodys sleeping

2.forellis attacling columbians

3.nothing

4.columbians loading weapons

 

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Da Mavericko

Really? Woah, nice! It's...summer here...everyday in my home country lol.

 

Everybody's sleeping. Toni puts his 25 bombs there including 10 RPG rockets for extra salsa in the Colombian's territory. He leaves and sets a timer for 2 hours. The GOA is STILL having sex so he groans when his wife accidently kicked his testicles. Toni drives away in styyyyyle in his Roflcopter or something. He now

 

 

1) Faces Fronco Forellis's grandma. She looks like some barbarian back in the Stone Ages, minus the beard. She looks like she eats horses 5 times a day! Packs a punch. BIIIIG handbag.

 

2) Goes to Salvatore for some chow time and wine. His Roflcopter crashes into a police car near there and the Mafia against the police war has started.

 

3) Reports for duty and goes to Afghanistan. The GOA didn't want him to go.

 

4) Waits and then suddenly it rains candy. The Forellis wake up.

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iamanevilbastard

4) Waits and then suddenly it rains candy. The Forellis wake up. ... "Toni, you need to wake up!" He opens his eyes. He's in a hospital bed, with Mickey and Sal standing over him. He thinks back to the fight...

 

He had the BB in a lock and got up and stomped him. He turned to walk away when he was struck in the back of the head and kicked several times while he was down. A bloke saw him and took him to the hospital. Toni had been ina coma for three weeks. To get revenge

1 He leads a hit team around liberty killing GH guys in the streets

2 Does nothing

3 Puts out a contract on the GH leader. Mickey accepts and blows him away with his .50 cal M107 sniper. He now owes Mickey $400,000.

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Da Mavericko

Puts out a contract on the GH leader. Mickey accepts and blows him away with his .50 cal M107 sniper. He now owes Mickey $400,000.

 

"Gimme my money, Toni."

"You can deduct $399,999 for our friendship."

"NO way, what are ya, mad?"

 

So Toni goes to the GOA's house in a bicycle.

 

"General, can you GIVE me 400k please?"

"Here, take a million. I'm too rich already, Toni."

"Thanks!"

"Buy your bling bling now and you owe me friendship for the rest of our lives. =)

 

1) Toni gives Mickey $400,000 and suddenly SA is beside LC.

2) Same thing but SA with no CJ in it.

3) Toni buys his stuff and leaves 300k for Mickey. Uh-oh.

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iamanevilbastard

3) Toni buys his stuff and leaves 300k for Mickey. Uh-oh. 'f*CK i need 300K!" Toni says, as he jacks a taxi. He drives around, doing taxi stuff, like picking up fares and sh!t until He sees a black Patriot right next to him. A window goes down and Toni sees a Forelli goon with an M4. Toni pulls out his Tec-9 and opens fire. The driver PIT maneuvers him and gets out with an AK. Toni

1 Gets out with a shotgun.

2 Ducks under the dash and reverses

3 Panics and dives out the side of the taxi, but grabs his suitcase full of money first.

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
Da Mavericko

AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was away for less than a fortnight and this topic sunk?

 

Toni runs away in panic with the Forellis chasing after him, with the cash in hand. He remembers something about some guy saying to CJ when he played SA a few days ago about keeping up with him. He runs faster than he's ever had before, and the Patriot's engine burns out. He pays Mickey.

 

1) It's hurricane season and peds fly everywhere while Toni sits with Sal and the hot Chilean chick who nearly got bankrupt and watch from Sal's house as the peds drown, catch fire, get hit by cars, fall over, break their necks and slam into gangsters who war during that time.

 

2) H1N1 gets to LCS...and Christmas ran away in a B-2 Spirit...?

 

3) Peds go crazy because they think the GOA killed Michael Jackson so they riot outside a cave and go on strikes.

 

4) Toni watches seagulls and keeps one as his special pet. But then his gull got kidnapped by the rioting peds! What will he do?

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iamanevilbastard

Yep. All the life boats were taken, so i had to stay here and die like a man. Just like the Titanic.

 

1) It's hurricane season and peds fly everywhere while Toni sits with Sal and the hot Chilean chick who nearly got bankrupt and watch from Sal's house as the peds drown, catch fire, get hit by cars, fall over, break their necks and slam into gangsters who war during that time.

 

Watching the chaos, Toni sips from his sixty-in-one-triple-vodka, while Sal has some LSD. "Hey, I've just figured out who you look like," Toni says to the Chilean chick. "Oh f*kn rlly?" The chilean chick says, as she ducks under a flying dead ped. "F7ck, I dropped my tequila!" She yells as she pours herself another one.

 

"Yeah, the Israeli bird ofF of N-" The chilean chick pulls a 9mm and says "shut up".

 

Toni gets a phone call from Mickey "Man, I need backup. I was doing a hit on a Triad heavy and this sh!t started. Theres like 70 Triads surrounding me man!" Toni takes some Leone boys with shotguns and one with a sniper rifle. He grabs his AK and they go to China town. The sniper takes up a positiona nd fires a shot. The Leones go in, while Toni provides cover fire and lobs grenades at the Triads. Six go down and the hurricane blows one away to

1 Obamas holiday home in Jamaica

2 A Cuban drug dealers personal gym

3 Sals place, while he's still getting high off the LSD.

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Da Mavericko

Lol, dramatic...

 

The hurricane blew one way to a Cuban drg dealer's personal gym. He dies after his bodyguard tries to shoot the hurricane but misfires and shoots the drg dealer instead. He respawns in some hospital. The Traids run out of ammo and carry Mickey away with heavy fire from the Leones and they dump him in one of their smelly fish vans. they drive away.

 

1) Toni just leaves the Leones to take care of it then he takes out his PS2 and plays Grand Theft Auto: San Andrea's. He said,"I wonder when SA would fall next to LC..." But then the Traids drive past his house with Leones following then he calls the GOA for a Rhino. But got rejected..

 

2) Toni goes mad and uses one of the Triads as a horsie.

 

3) The van couldn't start.

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08LasVenturas

3) The van doesn't start

 

Toni gets pissed off, and decides to...

 

1 - Smash the van with a bat

 

2- Hijack another car

 

3 - Feel up a nearby hooker then kill her

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Da Mavericko

Toni gets pissed off and jacks another car. A Stallion. Black with flames at the side of it...sounds familiar? That gangter inside the car had two SMGs and starts firing at Toni.

 

"Shi$, didn't know those goons had enough cash to buy some of those!" Toni floors the accelerator and the Leones deal with him.

One fine sunny day (he is still kidnapped), Mickey is taken to a...

 

1) Stinky fish warehouse.

2) big amusement park that came to LC a day ago.

3) lighthouse. Portland Rock.

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3) lighthouse. Portland Rock.

"Why do people who get kidnapped always end up here?" Mickey asked the Triads.

"Ching chong chow." Replied a Triad.

Mickey and the thugs took a tiring trek up the stairs of the lighthouse. As they reach the top, they all collapsed due to their knackered feet, until the sound of a hot rod engine alerted everyone back up...

 

- The (yes, THE) Diablo Stallion was driving along a cliffside

 

- A Thunderodd was just passing along the beach

 

- A BF Injection was traveling along the beach

 

- The Diablo Stallion was flying (wut)

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3) lighthouse. Portland Rock.

"Why do people who get kidnapped always end up here?" Mickey asked the Triads.

"Ching chong chow." Replied a Triad.

Mickey and the thugs took a tiring trek up the stairs of the lighthouse. As they reach the top, they all collapsed due to their knackered feet, until the sound of a hot rod engine alerted everyone back up...

 

- The (yes, THE) Diablo Stallion was driving along a cliffside

 

- A Thunderodd was just passing along the beach

 

- A BF Injection was traveling along the beach

 

- The Diablo Stallion was flying (wut)

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Damn, happened to you too.

 

OT:

 

-A BF Injection was traveling along the beach

 

 

Mickey quickly asks for permission to use a unloaded ssniper rifle to see who is driving the BF Injection. When he sees 2 Leones with 2 RPGs and a fully loaded box of sh*t to blow up. Then...

 

-Tells the triads who is driving the BF Injection

 

-Starts beating up the Triads with the Sniper Rifle

 

-Starts looking for a edge where he could easily jump off and safely land in the water.

 

The butcher, the baker, time to meet your maker

Tell you to your face, you ain't nuttin but a faker

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iamanevilbastard

holy sh!t its jordy

 

-Starts looking for a edge where he could easily jump off and safely land in the water. The Triads take the safeties off their AKs. Mickey runs in a zig zag fashion, dodging bullets. He dives into the water as the Leones launch RPGs at the island. However, they're not normal RPGs, they're those tactical nukes which can be used to blow up bridges and sh!t. The island is f*cking incinerated as Mickey swims to the shore. When he gets there

1 A sniper takes out the Leones and takes Mickey hostage. Its another Triad mobster.

2 The Leones take him to Sals place

3 Same as 1, but Toni's in the back napping and wakes up as the gangster takes Mickey hostage.

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A sniper takes out the Leones and takes Mickey hostage, It's another Triad mobster, but Toni is in the back napping and wakes up as the gangster take Mickey Hostage. Toni follows the tracks on the sand. When he sees the Mobster about 100m away from an empty triad fish van, he...

 

1. Sprints the 100m as fast as he can and knockout the mobster

 

2. He calls for some Leones to track the fish van

 

3. He shoots down the mobster using the sniper the mobster had dropped

The butcher, the baker, time to meet your maker

Tell you to your face, you ain't nuttin but a faker

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Da Mavericko
1. Sprints the 100m as fast as he can and knockout the mobster

 

 

But that Chinese dude was so fat that when a sumo wrestler saw him he ran away! His meals are usually turkeys. Breakfast, lunch, tea, high tea, dinner, dessert, supper. All turkey. Toni hits him but the impact sends TONI into a wall.

 

1) That gangsta is pissed off.

2) Toni respawned at the Portland Hospital. Mission failed.

3) Toni recovers and uses his gun to take care of him. He takes aim....but then...

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