Writers' Ideas

[Sheeno]

I have only ever submitted one piece of writing here, and then didn't really get any feedback because apparently it was too long and too much of a "wall of text". I tried to fix that, but I still got no feedback for it, so meh. I think it's time I tried submitting a whole new piece of prose.

 

Problem is, I have no idea for something to write a short story on (or a series of short pieces, each connecting to be a story). How do you people come up with plot ideas? The only idea I've got is how I remember one of the most thrilling parts of a book I've ever read was when someone was trapped in a cave and needed to swim his way out (I forget what the book was, though). I would quite like to incorporate that idea into my piece somehow, but I have no idea where to start for that sort of climax to occur.

 

Any help?

[Lethal Nizzle]

I get my ideas from films, or something I've watched of played recently. I remember when I watched Black Hawk Down. Straight after the credits rolled I got on the computer and began writing. It's these moments were you get a sudden burst of a need to write, and I get these often.

 

Um, I've an idea for your escaping the cave scenario;

 

• [-]The main character is on an archaeoligic trip to a series of caverns off the coast of ___ (country/place here). He hires an old friend who owns a boat to drive him there. Little does he know that these caverns have gained the interest of criminals. When the main character arrives at the caverns, he begins to look around, leaving his buddy on his own. These criminals arrive at the cave and kill the boat man. Scared for his life, the main character dives into another cavern as gunfire is heard. Somehow (up to you) the cave begins to crumble around him, leaving him trapped. And so on and so forth.

Just an idea off the top of my head.

 

EDIT: A small blurb about my story is now on my signature.

[Rhoda]

I have the rough outline to another story written but I refuse to touch it again until Ghost is finished. If I get plot ideas or other notes, I'll write them on Post Its and bung it in the drawer it's kept in. I know very little as it is, though I've got a concrete title; "Empress".

[Sheeno]

I get my ideas from films, or something I've watched of played recently. I remember when I watched Black Hawk Down. Straight after the credits rolled I got on the computer and began writing. It's these moments were you get a sudden burst of a need to write, and I get these often.

 

Um, I've an idea for your escaping the cave scenario;

• [-]The main character is on an archaeoligic trip to a series of caverns off the coast of ___ (country/place here). He hires an old friend who owns a boat to drive him there. Little does he know that these caverns have gained the interest of criminals. When the main character arrives at the caverns, he begins to look around, leaving his buddy on his own. These criminals arrive at the cave and kill the boat man. Scared for his life, the main character dives into another cavern as gunfire is heard. Somehow (up to you) the cave begins to crumble around him, leaving him trapped. And so on and so forth.

Just an idea off the top of my head.

 

EDIT: A small blurb about my story is now on my signature.

Ooh, I like it. Thank you very much. I think I'll start work on a short story about this tomorrow, and see if I think it's worth posting here.

[Lethal Nizzle]

Okay guys, here's a small part of the first chapter of my Green State fic. I'm thinking of using the title "A Green State of Affairs", thanks to whoever mentioned it. Anywho, here's the first part of the first chapter. Enjoy!

 

The subway train darted through the tunnel, it's metallic white body appearing as a blur as it showed no signs of stopping. It seemed that the driver was on a tight schedule, and needed to get somewhere fast. The driver glanced upwards at the small portable television which hung from the ceiling. The screen flicked inbetween different feeds of the train, and at the moment the TV showed the carriage nearest to the driver's cabin. It was nearly empty, which wasn't rare on the subway. The driver saw only three people in the carriage; two men and one woman.

 

The woman was old and frail-looking, and was glued to the middle pages of a newspaper. The man nearest to the cabin was young, probably a student at the local school, judging by the uniform. And finally, the driver's gaze met the final person in the carriage. The man looked older than the student, but by at least four or five years. He looked in his twenties, with short brown hair and a prominent face. He looked like any other citizen would, with a baggy white t-shirt and stonewashed jeans.

 

But this man was Matthias King.

 

The driver looked away from the TV as a light activated on his dashboard. He grunted as he began to slow the train down as it approached the largest subway station in the state; Heart City Central.

 

The student sensed that they were approaching the station and stood up, using a hand to grab onto the pole next to him. On the black marquee above the cabin door, gold letters flew past stating that they were nearing Heart City Central. From the back of the carriage, Matthias stood, both hands firmly dug in jean pockets. In a few seconds the train began to grind to a halt, and a large green and white tiled room came into view.

 

The station had seen much better days; some tiles had been ripped off or cracked, and rubbish littered the platform. A small group of teenagers were backing into the toilets, and a flash of white from one of the boy's hands told Matthias that they were off to snort coke. It seemed the norm in today's society. When the train finally stopped, the doors hissed open and Matthias walked out. He was expecting waves upon waves of commuters to jump onto the train, but out of the people standing on the platform, only three stepped into the train.

 

When Matthias finally took in the sights, or lack thereof, in the underground station, he made his way to the steps. As he did, he flipped out a tatty mobile phone. Accessing the menu, Matthias pressed the icon named "Contacts". He scrolled down the small list until he found who he was looking for. Pressing the call button, Matthias raised the phone to his ear, hearing the dial tone.

 

"Yeah? Who is it?" A gruff voice came from the other end of the line.

 

"Danny it's me. I just arrived."

 

"Ah Matt bruv! What's up?" The tone of voice jumped up considerably into a near high pitch squeal.

 

"Um, not really much mate. Just stepped off the train. An-"

 

Matt was cut off by a rather excited Danny. "You're at Heart City Central yeah?"

 

"Yeah." Matt began to skip up the steps, glancing up briefly to see if anyone stood in his way.

 

"A'ight. I'll be there in a bit. Hang tight bruv. Oh, and welcome to the scorn of the world mate."

 

And with that, Daniel King hung up. Matt was standing at the top of the stairwell and before him sat a rather empty taxi bay. He buried the phone back into his trouser pocket and began to look around. Matt's official time in Heart City had begun.

 

_____

 

After at least ten minutes, a crimson red Esperanto pulled up in front of Matt. He knew instantly from the pictures his brother had sent him that this was Danny's ride. Whatever he's been up to, he's done well, Matt thought, as he slowly walked toward the passenger side of the car. As he did, the window lowered. It was obvious Danny and Matt were twins; both had the same facial structure, and hair colour. They were both roughly the same height too, but what diffrentiated the two was Danny's clothing style.

 

Danny was wearing overly large aviator style glasses with a blue tint. His baseball cap was tilted to the side and from what Matt could see, he was wearing a basketball vest and a pair of tracksuit bottoms. From Matt's point of view, he looked like an idiot, and the epitome of a wannabe gangster.

 

"Matto, my bro! Hop in then!"

 

Matt frowned, but still followed Danny and got into the car. When he did, he felt a skinny arm wrap around his neck.

 

"It's great that your here Matt. How was the trip down?" Danny leaned in closer and brought his glasses down so Matt could see his eyes. "No trouble?"

 

"Nah, it was alright." Matt thought back to the train, and how empty it was.

 

"How's Mum?"

 

"Um, she's good. Nic's looking after her."

 

"Ah right. How's Nic?" Danny replied, referring to their younger sister. Danny slowly guided his Esperanto out of the taxi bay and turned into the street. "The last time I heard from her she was doin' some art crap."

 

"Yeah, she passed that exam."

 

"B*llocks! She's sh*t at art!"

 

Matt frowned again at his brother. It seemed like his memory had been erased. "Nicole's sick at art. Remember she drew that drawing for Mum?"

 

"The one with the vase?" Danny shook his head, before imitating a female voice. "Ooh Nicole, that's so chic. Ooh, that's so abstract."

 

Matt laughed. If it was one thing Danny was good at, it was making people laugh. Everyone knew him as a very naive person, yet he thought of himself as a comedy genius. Matt looked away from his brother and looked outside from his window. Endless blocks of flats lined both sides of the street, and each seemed to have the same amount of graffiti on their walls. The murmur of the radio was suddenly turned up full blast as Matt realised the sheer power of the huge speakers in the back seats.

 

"I blooooody love this song Matty boy!" Danny yelled over the noise, as a wave of hard drums and synths blasted through the speakers. "As our sun goes down! C'mon Matt, you know this song! I hear your voice is calling me!"

 

"Danny, I seriously don't." Matt shook his head and turned his attention to the world outside of the sudden rave inside the car. The apartment blocks seemed to thin out into the distance. Matt could see traffic lights ahead and waited for Danny to stop.

 

But he didn't.

 

Instead, he ploughed through the crossroads, and made a sharp right, throwing Matt's head dangerously out of the open window. Matt leaned back into Danny as they began to drive in a straight line once more. Matt looked over at Danny, who was acting as if nothing had happened, with one hand on the steering wheel and the other pounding into the air.

 

"You stupid c*nt! You could've sent me through the bloody windshield!" Matt held his hands up in protest, but Danny carried on pounding his fist in the air. With a swift smack around the back of Danny's head, the older brother's attention changed unwillingly to Matt.

 

"What the hell was that for!?"

 

"You coulda killed us then!"

 

"Matt, my boy," Danny began, turning his attention back to the road, flicking off the radio as he did. "This is how it is in Green State mate; no holds barred. Like I said on the phone, this place is a bloody mess, the scorn of the world. Back home, the only gang was the police, and maybe those kids that hung around at the skate park. But here, gangs rule every single inch of this place."

 

"What's that got to do with your crap driving?"

 

Danny seemed to wave off Matt's reply as he said something which related in no way to what he had just told Matt. "Welcome to hell mate, just bloody make yourself at home."

 

Matt turned away from his brother again, and looked into his lap, arms crossed. He already had a bad feeling about his brother, and Green State.

[Lt. Dan]

I have an idea that I really need to develop and share. Basically, the beginning is a man killing himself. Either that or doing something very insane. When he dies, he is sent back to the happiest moment of his life, and lives it over again (it is not the dead him, he literally lives his life over again from that point on) and we find out what happened to drive him to commit those actions. I'm thinking this is kind of generic and might can it.

 

Another is about a boy who moves to the outskirts of Russia with his parents during the eighties. He gets tutored by a mysterious man who owns many old European artifacts. Basically, one of these artifacts takes him to a world of fantasy that is at a war with both sides having all resources gone and troops exhausted and he must decide who he must help win. All the while, his father (who works for the government) is in a very real battle with the Russians.

 

Feedback?

 

 

 

[mark-2007]

 

I have an idea that I really need to develop and share. Basically, the beginning is a man killing himself. Either that or doing something very insane. When he dies, he is sent back to the happiest moment of his life, and lives it over again (it is not the dead him, he literally lives his life over again from that point on) and we find out what happened to drive him to commit those actions. I'm thinking this is kind of generic and might can it.

 

Another is about a boy who moves to the outskirts of Russia with his parents during the eighties. He gets tutored by a mysterious man who owns many old European artifacts. Basically, one of these artifacts takes him to a world of fantasy that is at a war with both sides having all resources gone and troops exhausted and he must decide who he must help win. All the while, his father (who works for the government) is in a very real battle with the Russians.

 

Feedback?

The first idea, to my eyes, doesn't seem generic at all. It seems quite a good idea - as long as you have in mind something which drove him to suicide.

 

The second idea kinda seems odd, it might work or it might not. It really depends on how fantasy-based it is, fantasy isn't popular on here so you might not get much feedback, on the other hand you may be skilled enough to make it a bit more popular. It seems a weird storyline though too - both sides of the plot seem a bit iffy as they could turn out boring if you don't think them out enough.

 

Overall, I like the first one the most - perhaps concentrate on writing that and then once you're finished, take some time to rethink the second one.

 

Also, for the second one: I was thinking since you '80s Russia - the artefact could take him into an alternate reality kinda thang and a Cold War-era nuclear war.

[Lt. Dan]

 

I have an idea that I really need to develop and share. Basically, the beginning is a man killing himself. Either that or doing something very insane. When he dies, he is sent back to the happiest moment of his life, and lives it over again (it is not the dead him, he literally lives his life over again from that point on) and we find out what happened to drive him to commit those actions. I'm thinking this is kind of generic and might can it.

 

Another is about a boy who moves to the outskirts of Russia with his parents during the eighties. He gets tutored by a mysterious man who owns many old European artifacts. Basically, one of these artifacts takes him to a world of fantasy that is at a war with both sides having all resources gone and troops exhausted and he must decide who he must help win. All the while, his father (who works for the government) is in a very real battle with the Russians.

 

Feedback?

The first idea, to my eyes, doesn't seem generic at all. It seems quite a good idea - as long as you have in mind something which drove him to suicide.

 

The second idea kinda seems odd, it might work or it might not. It really depends on how fantasy-based it is, fantasy isn't popular on here so you might not get much feedback, on the other hand you may be skilled enough to make it a bit more popular. It seems a weird storyline though too - both sides of the plot seem a bit iffy as they could turn out boring if you don't think them out enough.

 

Overall, I like the first one the most - perhaps concentrate on writing that and then once you're finished, take some time to rethink the second one.

 

Also, for the second one: I was thinking since you '80s Russia - the artefact could take him into an alternate reality kinda thang and a Cold War-era nuclear war.

Not realistic fantasy, more of like a Narnia or Golden Compass kind of thing.

 

But the nuclear thing sounds good too. IT'd be kind of like Pan's Labywrinth. He gets caught up in this fantasy world while his father and mother are in a very serious situation.

[mark-2007]

I have an idea that I really need to develop and share. Basically, the beginning is a man killing himself. Either that or doing something very insane. When he dies, he is sent back to the happiest moment of his life, and lives it over again (it is not the dead him, he literally lives his life over again from that point on) and we find out what happened to drive him to commit those actions. I'm thinking this is kind of generic and might can it.

 

Another is about a boy who moves to the outskirts of Russia with his parents during the eighties. He gets tutored by a mysterious man who owns many old European artifacts. Basically, one of these artifacts takes him to a world of fantasy that is at a war with both sides having all resources gone and troops exhausted and he must decide who he must help win. All the while, his father (who works for the government) is in a very real battle with the Russians.

 

Feedback?

The first idea, to my eyes, doesn't seem generic at all. It seems quite a good idea - as long as you have in mind something which drove him to suicide.

 

The second idea kinda seems odd, it might work or it might not. It really depends on how fantasy-based it is, fantasy isn't popular on here so you might not get much feedback, on the other hand you may be skilled enough to make it a bit more popular. It seems a weird storyline though too - both sides of the plot seem a bit iffy as they could turn out boring if you don't think them out enough.

 

Overall, I like the first one the most - perhaps concentrate on writing that and then once you're finished, take some time to rethink the second one.

 

Also, for the second one: I was thinking since you '80s Russia - the artefact could take him into an alternate reality kinda thang and a Cold War-era nuclear war.

Not realistic fantasy, more of like a Narnia or Golden Compass kind of thing.

 

But the nuclear thing sounds good too. IT'd be kind of like Pan's Labywrinth. He gets caught up in this fantasy world while his father and mother are in a very serious situation.

Ah, I dunno - I ready the Golden Compass and liked it when I was younger but I can't see myself or many others on here wanting to read about talking polar bears/lions/other animal. As I've said before, I'd stick with your first idea.

[Lethal Nizzle]

Um guys, any feedback on my part of the story, or should I start a new topic and post the rest?

[Sheeno]

 

Okay guys, here's a small part of the first chapter of my Green State fic. I'm thinking of using the title "A Green State of Affairs", thanks to whoever mentioned it. Anywho, here's the first part of the first chapter. Enjoy!

 

[snip]

Grammatical errors:

 

"tunnel, it's metallic" - "it's" should be "its".

 

"screen flicked inbetween" - "inbetween" should actually be "in between"

 

"When Matthias finally took in the sights, or lack thereof, in the underground station, he made his way to the steps." - This is rather trivial, but I think it should be "When Matthias had finally taken". Otherwise it's kind of saying he took in the sights simultaneously as he made his way to the steps, and it doesn't sound like very good English. Not to me, anyway.

 

"but what diffrentiated" - Probably just a typo. Should be "differentiated".

 

"It's great that your here Matt" - Should be "you're here".

 

Sorry if you wanted comments on the story itself and not grammatical errors, I just couldn't help myself.

 

Anyway, I think it's very good for a beginning to a story. You conjure up images of these characters well, and I already feel that I know Matt and Danny personally. I also like the character interaction, it's fully believable without being dull.

 

I'll be waiting to read more of this.

 

 

EDIT: Oh yeah, and I was meaning to ask. You may have already said this, but was this perchance inspired by the movie Green Street?

Edited May 31, 2008 by Sheeno

[Lethal Nizzle]

Thanks for the pointings out Sheeno. Some of them were pretty bad mistakes.

 

I like to build up the characters through the story. Right now, Danny's excited with his brother being in Green State. But as the story goes on, you'll see a different side to him.

 

Um, not really. That's the first time anyone's asked.

 

I'll probably incorporate the gritty underground feel of Green Street into it, if that'll make better reading.

[HawaiianHardHitter]

I've been spending the last couple of weeks trying to perfect some awesome plotlines for a new story of mines. In fact, I want to try and make it into a Television-Script. I have been studying a few scripts and guides and hopefully it'll pay off. Here's a little summary of sorts, though. I want to try and post the whole thing up in at least a week or two.

 

 

 

 

The Story of My Life

 

"Who Says You're Like the College You Got Accepted To?"

 

Aspiring football quarterback, David Jermaine has just graduated from college, but unfortunately suffers a severe shoulder injury before the big NFL Draft. Now, with his dream career flushed down the drain, Jermaine returns back to his hometown of Ocean City in hopes of finding a new career there. Needing a place to stay, he bunks in with with his best friend, Mark Stanford, who works at a local Jack in the Box. When David first arrives, he is welcomed back with open arms by some of his old high school buddies, but finds out that his ex-high school sweetheart is now going out with Mark. Dave and Mark attempts to cope through this without killing each other, as Dave tries to find the right job that pays right.

 

I got this story from one of my previous ideas, "Double Date" I'm trying to go and make this into a random, comedic story that's about random post-college insanity. You can expect this to be up soon.

[Carbine23]

My Microsoft Word stopped freezing so i should be able to continue Part 1 to The Man Who Once Spoke. It's almost done though. And even though it didn't get superior attention, nobody pointed out any flaws in the story and the 6 or 7 people who gave their feedback said they loved the story and thought it was brilliant. I will write Part 2 to The Man Who Once Spoke. Due to my expectations though, the parts of Claude's life before the events in GTA3 could be 4 - 5 parts all together! And then if i really got enough good feedback, then i would go on to make the aftermath of GTA3.

 

After Part 1 is finished, i will write the whole Part 2 first instead of typing chapters as i post them. I also need to finish my All Ghillied Up Story, but i might abandon it. Red Liberty didn't get enough feedback to make it into the big leagues, but my story "The Man Who Once Spoke" seems to be my best work yet.

[mark-2007]

 

My Microsoft Word stopped freezing so i should be able to continue Part 1 to The Man Who Once Spoke. It's almost done though. And even though it didn't get superior attention, nobody pointed out any flaws in the story and the 6 or 7 people who gave their feedback said they loved the story and thought it was brilliant. I will write Part 2 to The Man Who Once Spoke. Due to my expectations though, the parts of Claude's life before the events in GTA3 could be 4 - 5 parts all together! And then if i really got enough good feedback, then i would go on to make the aftermath of GTA3.

 

After Part 1 is finished, i will write the whole Part 2 first instead of typing chapters as i post them.  I also need to finish my All Ghillied Up Story, but i might abandon it. Red Liberty didn't get enough feedback to make it into the big leagues, but my story "The Man Who Once Spoke" seems to be my best work  yet.

Just a word of warning - keep each part to the original topic. Don't make new topics for each post. I;m sure you knew that already, but just advice.

 

@ HawaiianHardHitter: I've never seen a comedy story on here, it should be interesting. I'm not sure how important the blurb you gave is but "Dave and Mark attempts to cope through this without killing each other, as Dave tries to find the right job that pays right." I think the second 'right' should be replaced with 'well' or just remove the first 'right altogether, as it sounds weird when reading it.

[Rhoda]

I tried writing two comedy stories on here but both died. I can't even remember their names, but one was about an encounter with Satan and one was about the ghost of the Queen Mum going back to Earth to fix the UK.

[Carbine23]

 

My Microsoft Word stopped freezing so i should be able to continue Part 1 to The Man Who Once Spoke. It's almost done though. And even though it didn't get superior attention, nobody pointed out any flaws in the story and the 6 or 7 people who gave their feedback said they loved the story and thought it was brilliant. I will write Part 2 to The Man Who Once Spoke. Due to my expectations though, the parts of Claude's life before the events in GTA3 could be 4 - 5 parts all together! And then if i really got enough good feedback, then i would go on to make the aftermath of GTA3.

 

After Part 1 is finished, i will write the whole Part 2 first instead of typing chapters as i post them.  I also need to finish my All Ghillied Up Story, but i might abandon it. Red Liberty didn't get enough feedback to make it into the big leagues, but my story "The Man Who Once Spoke" seems to be my best work  yet.

Just a word of warning - keep each part to the original topic. Don't make new topics for each post. I;m sure you knew that already, but just advice.

Yeah but now i'm not so sure i'm going to do it so quickly . I got a lot of feedback in the beginning but then it died down. Probably because some people weren't interested or because it was too long.

 

Anyway i thought of a new idea for a story. It would be called

Inferno: Odyssey of Hell

 

About: Johnny Infernelli has done bad things in his life. When he died in a gang shootout, he went to hell. He was always a religious person however and wants to go to heaven to be with his family. In order to get into the gateway of heaven, he takes the name Inferno and goes on a long quest to rescue his friends in hell and escape with them into heaven through the Obelisk which transports people from the Underworld to God's kingdom. He will encounter demons, beasts, fear and other quests in order to reach the Obelisk Zone just how Odysseus in the Odyssey went on a long adventure to reach his home.

Edited June 4, 2008 by Carbine23

[Rhoda]

During my weekend in London, I spent a lot of time either on the Underground or on the coach to and from London itself. During this time, I doodled a damn lot and also drafted some rough outlines to a few plots I wish to base in the same "universe" as Ghost, perhaps having 5 or 6 stories in the same canon. Just a rough idea at the moment, but I'd love to carry it out.

[The Unvirginiser]

During my weekend in London, I spent a lot of time either on the Underground or on the coach to and from London itself. During this time, I doodled a damn lot and also drafted some rough outlines to a few plots I wish to base in the same "universe" as Ghost, perhaps having 5 or 6 stories in the same canon. Just a rough idea at the moment, but I'd love to carry it out.

Get on that mate!

 

[Rhoda]

Oh, I intend to. Not all will be as psychotic or as horrific as I intend Ghost to be, but rest assured I'll put my mind to it.

Speaking of Ghost, things are going to pick up and you're going to look at one particular character in a whole new perspective, I guarantee it.

[The Unvirginiser]

Oh, I intend to. Not all will be as psychotic or as horrific as I intend Ghost to be, but rest assured I'll put my mind to it.

Speaking of Ghost, things are going to pick up and you're going to look at one particular character in a whole new perspective, I guarantee it.

Sounds good

 

Lots of ideas for SA stories, it's just being bothered to get it written down! Expect a lot of returning characters..

I had the idea of alternative endings for Bravo Seven Down.. however I've scrapped that and decided to do them for SA stories

So at the end, I will have the thread turned in to a poll and you will vote on which ending you want me to post, ending one, two or three

[Damo.]

Oh, I intend to. Not all will be as psychotic or as horrific as I intend Ghost to be, but rest assured I'll put my mind to it.

Speaking of Ghost, things are going to pick up and you're going to look at one particular character in a whole new perspective, I guarantee it.

Sounds good

 

Lots of ideas for SA stories, it's just being bothered to get it written down! Expect a lot of returning characters..

I had the idea of alternative endings for Bravo Seven Down.. however I've scrapped that and decided to do them for SA stories

So at the end, I will have the thread turned in to a poll and you will vote on which ending you want me to post, ending one, two or three

Will you write the other two after the story is over?

[The Unvirginiser]

Oh, I intend to. Not all will be as psychotic or as horrific as I intend Ghost to be, but rest assured I'll put my mind to it.

Speaking of Ghost, things are going to pick up and you're going to look at one particular character in a whole new perspective, I guarantee it.

Sounds good

 

Lots of ideas for SA stories, it's just being bothered to get it written down! Expect a lot of returning characters..

I had the idea of alternative endings for Bravo Seven Down.. however I've scrapped that and decided to do them for SA stories

So at the end, I will have the thread turned in to a poll and you will vote on which ending you want me to post, ending one, two or three

Will you write the other two after the story is over?

Possibly

Technically all three will be written and sealed before the poll begins..

And I will have an independent person read all three just to let everybody know I'm not bullsh*tting, then I may or may not post the alternative endings...

[nutboy]

It could be about toni taking over sals gang and renaming them the ciprianis. It can also be a battle for control of the gang with joey leone. Eventually who ever wins the gang heads out to kill claude and eventually one of them end up dead and take over the gang.

It would be cool to see something like this.

 

 

[Carbine23]

I know Vercetti is working on his 1940's mafia story but i might do something similar to that after i finally complete "The Man Who Once Spoke." But it won't be a mafia story completely, but it would be a detective story similar to the Black Dahlia and Rockstar's future game L.A. Noire. However the setting would either be in New York City in 1929 - 1939 or in a fictional New York/Chicago inspired city like Lost Heaven in Mafia.

 

The title could possibly be "N.Y. Noire" if it has the NYC setting. If this affects Vercetti21 in a way then i won't write it because i'm really looking forward to his story.

[Cubanwhip]

It could be about toni taking over sals gang and renaming them the ciprianis. It can also be a battle for control of the gang with joey leone. Eventually who ever wins the gang heads out to kill claude and eventually one of them end up dead and take over the gang.

It would be cool to see something like this.

Speaking of unoriginal, overdone plots...

 

Sorry, but plots similar to this have been done so many times. Post-GTA 3 plots where the "Leone/Cipriani" family hunt down the killer of the former Don, Claude. The only thing you're done is add an internal conflict with the Leones. I'd say this is the least creative story I've seen. Well, next to Leprechaun who just rewrote out all the GTA's plots into a narrative.

[Don Garcia aka NjNakedSnake]

Well damn, I'm about to get really involved in this forum. I haven't been in here since Finish The Story back in the summer, but it's time. I kept saying I was going to write a story, but I always get sidetracked when I write. Too many great ideas pop into my head and it's a bitch to get it all down on paper.

 

But I have to write something, just to get some input from 'yous guys.

[Carbine23]

Well damn, I'm about to get really involved in this forum. I haven't been in here since Finish The Story back in the summer, but it's time. I kept saying I was going to write a story, but I always get sidetracked when I write. Too many great ideas pop into my head and it's a bitch to get it all down on paper.

 

But I have to write something, just to get some input from 'yous guys.

Make a sequel to No Country For Old Men

[Don Garcia aka NjNakedSnake]

^ Don't put it past me.

 

What happened to Anton? And the money....

[Carbine23]

 

^ Don't put it past me.

 

What happened to Anton? And the money....

I wasn't getting enough feedback so i gave up on that story. However my new story "The Man Who Once Spoke" is doing pretty good. Check it out sometime.