jack thompson fanfiction

[pyramid head]

long story short this is a jack thompson fanfic i wrote please read and review

 

ps i'm in this fanfic you can id me by my username

 

fanfic 1

 

let's just say that Jack Thompson is the prosecutor prosecuting Devin Moore who shot 3 policemen after being taken to a police station for questioning regarding a stolen vehicle.

 

Jack Thompson

Your honor it is my belief that Mr Devin Moore who is sitting here today was influenced by the videogame Grand Theft Auto Vice City when he was arrested by police for questioning regarding a stolen vehicle when he was brought into the police station he grabbed a gun and shot 3 policemen before fleeing.

 

pyramid head

Your honor may i approach the bench?

 

judge

you may

 

pyramid head

Mr Thompson would you approach the bench as well please

 

Jack Thompson approaches the bench

 

pyramid head

Your honor it is my belief that Mr Thompson is less interested in prosecuting Mr Moore for shooting 3 policemen and i believe he is more interested in prosecuting Rockstar and Grand Theft Auto for their obviously unrelated involvement in this case as you heard from Mr Thompson's opening testimony he mentioned Grand Theft Auto before he mentioned that Mr Moore shot 3 policemen his arguement that Grand Theft Auto is responsible for making Mr Moore shoot those policemen is one sided there are other factors that may have made Mr Moore shoot those policemen and i feel that these factors are not being considered in this case was he on drugs?, had he been drinking?' was he under stress? any one of these factors could have made Mr Moore shoot those policemen or it could have been a combination of all 3 factors.

 

I recommend that Mr Thompson be removed from this case immediately and that he be ordered to take a sanity test to prove his competence as a lawyer because i find his opening testimony to be extremely one sided and biased against Grand Theft Auto i also recommend that a competent lawyer who isn't biased against videogames and who will view this case objectively replace Mr Thompson as prosecuting lawyer for the duration of the case.

 

I also recommend that Mr Thompson be denied any involvement in which the charge is murder or attempted murder by an adolescent because he will try to claim Grand Theft Auto is responsible for any future incident where a teenager is found to have been the perpetrator of a violent incident.

 

judge

It is the ruling of this court that Mr Thompson be placed under investigation for the reasons the lawyer for the defense just stated and for attempting to claim that Mr Moore was influenced by a videogame.

 

Jack Thompson realises the case is starting to fall apart around him and resorts to his usual tactic of threatening to sue both the judge and the lawyer for the defense.

 

Jack Thompson

Neither of you have the right to do this to me i will sue you for stopping me from blaming Grand Theft Auto for this crime nothing can and ever will stop my crusade against videogames.

 

pyramid head

That's where you are wrong the judge has removed you from this case and ended your crusade against videogames once and for all

 

Jack Thompson

Your honor it is my opinion that you are an a$$hole and you will get what's coming to you for interfering with my attempt to blame Rockstar and Grand Theft Auto for this crime.

 

Judge

Mr Thompson you are in contempt of court another word from you and i will have you taken to a prison cell.

 

Jack Thompson

just try it i am going to sue you for what you have done.

 

Judge

Mr Thompson you leave me no other choice take him to the room with the padded walls and put him in the straight jacket if he resists shoot him.

 

almost immediately after Jack Thompson leaves the courtroom he is heard raising his voice and shouting at the guard.

 

Jack Thompson

I am Jack Thompson you have no right to do this to me release me at once or i will sue your ass for harassment.

 

sounds of a struggle are heard from outside the courtroom and a few seconds later a gun is heard going off outside the courtroom and everyone goes out into the hallway to find Jack Thompson holding a gun and lying in a pool of his own blood and clutching his nuts with his other hand.

 

Judge

What happened?

 

Guard

He grabbed my gun sir and when he realised the safety was on he turned the gun towards himself so he could turn the safety off and when he did turn the safety off the gun went off and that's how he ended up lying in a pool of his own blood.

 

Judge

I am not in the least bit surprised that this has happened i always knew this guy was nuts and this just confirms what i already know Jack Thompson is officially nuts to grab a gun and shoot himself and then claim that the guard shot him in an attempt to further his case.

 

Epilogue

3 weeks later

 

The investigation into Jack thompson's career was concluded and it was decided that his licence to practice law be revoked in every country around the world.

 

Jack Thompson took the sanity test which he subsequently failed the doctor who administered the sanity test Dr James Earl Cash recommended to the judge that Mr Thompson be remanded indefinitely to the darkwood mental asylum formerly known as darkwoods penitentary for extensive psychiatric evaluation the asylum is currently being run by Dr Lionel Starkweather.

 

As a result of Mr Thompson's long term incarceration all attempts to have videogames banned were unsuccessful on the grounds that videogames are protected by free speech videogames have since been recognised as an art form bully was released to critical acclaim and many people found much to their surprise that it wasn't as bad as Jack Thompson had everyone believe.

 

Surgeon's attempted to salvage what was left of Mr Thompson's nuts but were unable to help him as there was nothing left to salvage.

 

The Australian censorship body the office of film and literature classification was disbanded and replaced by the videogame age rating association which plans to release all 18 and adults only rated games in australia Grand Theft Auto 3, vice city, and san andreas were released in australia in their original form with all the removed content re-inserted into the games including hot coffee the rc classification on videogames was abolished in every country around the world.

 

Germany finally came to it's senses and lifted it's restrictions on games rated 18 and adults only all games that were banned before the restriction on games was lifted sold out quickly upon arriving in germany.

 

Jack thompson's wife filed for divorce jack signed the divorce papers and as per the terms of their pre-nuptial agreement she got his house, his cars, his money 15 million dollars and full custody of their kids, jack's wife gave rockstar back the 75 million that her ex-husband sued them for rockstar used that money to start work on Grand Theft Auto 4.

 

5 years later

During the inmates riot at the darkwoord mental asylum in 2011 Jack Thompson was found dead in his cell with a knife sticking out of his throat no-one ever admitted to killing him and no-one was ever charged with his murder.

 

Lionel Starkweather contacted Jack's ex-wife to see if she would take his body from them she refused telling starkweather he could do whatever he liked with the body starkweather decided to have thompson's body thrown into the asylum's furnace because it would cost too much to bury him.

 

the end

[lordmasterkris]

Not bad, but it lacks correct punctuation, spelling and any rational thought whatsoever.

 

So, yeah. . .

[Eminence]

No offence, but that's the most stupid thing I've ever read.