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machine scanner and the golden nugs


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This is fun. My friend said in the car today, "My goth name is Black Panther". I mistook him for saying that was his stoner name, thus machine scanner. How did I get this? Machine for the song "Welcome to the Machine" (song I heard when first got stoned) and Scanner for the movie A Scanner Darkly (because it's got a lot of drugs in it and it was easy). Um... I know this sucks, it's not supposed to be well written... just a little ditty. I am stoned yah know.

 

=====================

 

in the farest reaches

of the messiest and most resinated apartment,

a man so mysterious

that you can never see him for the fog that shrouds him.

 

he is machine scanner!

he will read fichte while toking off a jay,

look away from good italian cinema (but only for a sec)

to take a killer grav-bong hit!

he is

machine scanner!

 

and his nemesis...

refrigerator!

"you'll never get inside me,

machine scanner!"

machine scanner laughs.

 

machine scanner laughs.

 

machine scanner laughs.

 

ahhhhh. giggle. okay, really.

"i will too, refrigerator, man!

i will open you up and just

eat right from you!

impudent refrigerator!"

machine scanner laughs again

and makes a dash across the living room

and in one foul swoop throws open

refrigerator

and a feast ensues

"but i'll be cold and lonesome, no!"

 

in the farest reaches of the messiest and most resinated apartment,

a man so mysterious you can never see him for the fog that shrouds him......

MACHINE SCANNER!

 

 

 

the cold winter night beckoned me from

the apartment...

there's weed growing somewhere out there--

it must be chilly,

something must be done...

<i>hey you, out there all alone,

sitting naked by the phone,

can you--</i> "machiiiine scanner! whaaat's up, buddy?"

 

soon i was at the 'balla friday' residence

seeing what someone with such a name could do for me.

the nugs weren't lime...

no little red hairs or visible resin.

"now, i'm sorry, balla friday, man...

but these nugs just are not for me.....

man."

what balla friday retrieved from his cooler

after i said those words will warm up every winter night

i will ever experience in my life from here on out,

and my heart.

in small shrink wrap were five of the most gorgeous nugs

i have ever laid eyes on..

golden nugs.

golden nugs covered in platinum hairs

grown by the original buddha himself

(in an act of complete pacifism, the buddha

relinquished the golden nugs to a village pauper

some thousands of years ago, the pauper

shrink wrapped the golden nugs and placed them in a

lock-box and buried it at Strawberry Fields (a lennon tribute)

in central park. the key to the lock box was passed down

every generation and ended up in balla friday's hands).

 

"here, machine scanner", balla friday said,

"you can have these five golden nugs,

once cultivated by the buddha.

happy b-day, machine".

 

with the golden nugs mine i race

out the door without a word to balla friday.

i spent the rest of my night smoking weed

and meditating.

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