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Crokey

Grumpy Old Forumers

Recommended Posts

Crokey
The next pre-teen/early-teen I hear bitching about how hard their life is and how they have no friends and nobody loves them is going to get my foot in their face. 14 year olds complaining how their girlfriend/boyfriend left them and all that sh*t? F*ck off you little pukes, life can get much worse. Hell, it probably will. These little twats need to be shown a thing or two about real life.

I would like to smack them silly as well, they're all like "Oh my life sucks, I'm bored, theres nothing to do" while they're sitting there with their Playstations and Stereos pumping out music while they go down stairs and munch into a pile of food and leave half of it lying in their rooms to rot, then go outside to trash something and say that they were bored to the police when they get caught.... well hear this you little pr*cks, I'd like to drag you to a village in the middle of Sudan or Etheopia and where there are kids starving and dying from Aids and HIV, and then ask them in a classic Movie style way 'Do you feel lucky punk... well do yer'

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Jake

People who are happy all the time piss me off. I don't mind upbeat people and a few of my friends are and I can be like that a lot of times too. It's just when you see a person who's happy all the damn time, you gotta wonder what the f*ck is going on with them because very rarely have I seen people around me who have perfect lives. I know they could just be trying to make the best of things and stay positive and all that jazz, but c'mon man, everyone has to get pissed off or angry or something sometimes. And mimes, I don't like mimes.

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Oddsock
dunno about the droids, but i would like to find out why, and then summarily execute, people who start to signal, halfway through the turn while driving, as if it f*cking matters at that point. i mean, thats worse that skipping it altogether, which is at least justifiable (in a hurry, lazy, or just don't care). but to think letting people know your going to turn, while your turning is useful, is beyond comprehension.

I think we should just execute all casual drivers. If they don't know the cylinder-count and displacement of their engine...

 

 

BLAM!

 

 

ph34r.gif

I live in Maryland and my dad travels every once in a while as part of his job (mechanical engineer and project manager for an international company). My brother was talking about idiots on the road who don't use a turn signal and my dad told us (my bro and I) about how in Massachusets(SP?) the drivers never use their turn signals to merge into other lanes because if they do the people who SHOULD let them in front speed up to cut them off.

 

Then he remarked about how gentlemantly Swiss drivers are; they always pull back and allow you to merge.

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Mark

In the UK it's a mixture, some let you, some are just arseholes. Means you've gotta always be careful.

 

Mind you, always means for stereotypes, if they're driving a BMW, Merc, Lexus etc then they'll just act like a prick, most others are just random on the drivers mood.

 

In fact, that's one I'd like to bitch about, people who hang around on the rear door of your car after you both go straight on at a set of traffic lights and merge into one lane. I mean for f*cks sake I'm 1/2 a car length infront of you you c*nt now stop driving in a way that can get both of us pissed off. I remember someone that did it on a merger from 3 into 2 lanes in heavy traffic, he actually sat on the rear door of our Omega (long car) before trying to dive up the inside of us even though we were already in the middle of the lane, so being the car that it is, my dad floored it, pulled infront of him, he then pulled in behind us, only to get my dad slamming hard on the brakes and bringing the driver to a halt deliberately, swearing at him out the window then driving off. If the bloke wasn't such a c*nt, he wouldn't have lost about 20 seconds of his journey time cause it's oh so important for him to undertake one car off a set of lights to make up about 2 seconds on what he would be.

 

Sorry for the lack of paragraphing, but hey rants are best written like that.

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Raindancer

Me and some friends were driving home from a club a while back. Because there were six of us in a tiny little car, the police thought they would pull us over.

The driver got out of the car and started chatting to the copper. Me and the rest sat in the car, the other copper thought he would have a look under the bonnet.

 

So he lifted up the bonnet and stuck his head in there, my other mate sitting in the passenger seat though it would be funny to honk the horn.

PIGS CAN FLY!!!

 

Although my mate was dragged out of the car by his hair for that stunt!

 

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All-Blacks

 

Although my mate was dragged out of the car by his hair for that stunt!

Rodney King anyone? lol.gif God what a classic prank.

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silvermanblue
Me and some friends were driving home from a club a while back. Because there were six of us in a tiny little car, the police thought they would pull us over.

The driver got out of the car and started chatting to the copper. Me and the rest sat in the car, the other copper thought he would have a look under the bonnet.

 

So he lifted up the bonnet and stuck his head in there, my other mate sitting in the passenger seat though it would be funny to honk the horn.

PIGS CAN FLY!!!

 

Although my mate was dragged out of the car by his hair for that stunt!

Thats the second time raindancer that you got a laugh outa me. Yeah I am pretty tired of the police in small municipalitys. I had some pull me over for no license plate light. Now I believe this is bullsh*t. Heres what the cop was thinking. "hmmm car I don't recognise crap he isn't speeding better find somthing lses to pull him over for Aha the license plate light CaChing" Man I get so pissed off some times.

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Ben

Nagging/whinging females icon13.gif

 

Need I say more?

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Crokey

I've only really just managed to get back to a decent computer after being stuck with Library access just to check emails only for the past 4 weeks or so, and what do I come back to

 

Google Images most annoyingly stupid and absoutely pointless 'Re-vamp'. I don't know how many of you have seen it but it is now practically useless in it's current state, I've got a slight fix for it for IE7 but it keeps telling me that my computers at risk, at ain't, becuase Google have b*llocksed up a perfectly good system by making it look like MSN image searching. Without the fix it's a case of hovering your mouse over each individual image just to see what size it is and where it's hosted, which if your quickly after the right image it can take you about 5 years now... why just leave it on you daft pillocks... if it ain't broke don't fix it, ya bunch a fann*es ye.

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GTA3Rockstar

I would like to say, ENGLISH LANGUAGE IS THE LANGUAGE! For one, lets take Spanish for example! You would say "Cama" for bed in spanish, but you know what that means! So, how come they can't say bed, instead of cama!? It just doesn't make sense, please do explain why its so hard to do that! thanks

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Jordan

And what the hell is up with fat people trying to find parking spaces at stores? Stop driving around for five straight minutes. Park at the back of the parking lot and get some exercise you idiot. You make me sick.

 

And if I am backing out of a parking space and I can't see if anyone is coming from my left or right, I will always slowly pull backwards, but if you honk at me and fly past me in your stupid idiotic SUV, I will hunt you down and slit your throat.

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Saggy
And if I am backing out of a parking space and I can't see if anyone is coming from my left or right, I will always slowly pull backwards, but if you honk at me and fly past me in your stupid idiotic SUV, I will hunt you down and slit your throat.

There... There needs to be more like you!

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Crokey
On the subject of driving, I've only really noticed this in America, when you go to overtake someone on the freeway, in the name of Hugh Jackman, will you just speed up to get past then that's it done, don't do like what every spanner I've seen recently and pull out and hang around the fuel cap like theres a picture of a cute puppy or something on it, then slowly go past.... and have folk never heard of Braking Distances either, sheesh some folk I saw today on the road up to Atlanta from Florida, if they were any closer to the guy in fronts bumper, they'd be sniffing his butt without even moving their necks

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AZSupraT

Blogging. Nobody cares about your problems. If you were interesting enough to read about, than you would have actual friends that you could talk to. Stop posting your suicidal thoughts, mental breakdown experiences, bitching, and whiny-ass complaints on life. Try to consider keeping your thoughts to yourself. It's not like people want to hear about you having an emo breakdown because Jessica f*cked your best friend or that your mother beat you with a rake. Nobody wants to hear it, including me. I'm a bit tired of seeing peoples emotional rants and complaints all over the internet, namely on Livejournal and such sites.

 

Silly, but hey. sigh.gif

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All-Blacks
orly.gif Edited by All-Blacks

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Alternative Child
Whats pissing me off more than anything is all this American comedy crap on TV that people find funny die.gif (admit it Brit comedy is funny as heck, way funnier than that American trash smile.gif ), and they have the ball to put on the flippin' so called audience laughter (which really they press a button to play the same laughter over and over confused.gif ) after 90% of the dialouge which no one finds funny, f*ck OFF! I could pull off funnier comedys out of my ass than that crap.

 

Oh and how is Friends funny? After going on watching the best British sitcoms like Red Dwarf, Little Britain, Blackadder, Monty Python, Dad's Army, One Foot In The Grave, My Family, The Office etc, Friends looks like its been written by an infant comapared to the above Brit sitcoms.

It's the culture you grow up around that forms your since of comedy. To each his own, eh?

 

for me, Scenesters. Them bitches.

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Andyzoot

Little Britain and Monty Python (I assume you mean Flying Circus) are not sitcoms, they're sketch shows wink.gif

 

 

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Crokey

People who bump topics...

 

Or should I say those bleeps on a plane that when it comes to food time decide that this is the best time to shove their chair back therefore cutting you off at the waist and making your 'coffee' spill all over you.

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Kaj.

Those flip-tops on toothpaste tubes. f*cking useless things.

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~P.O.L.I.C.E~

 

ph34r.gif People who are in the left lane and is going slower than the right.

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Cajones

Never was a fan off jews.

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~P.O.L.I.C.E~

 

sneaky2.gif Im a Jew.... lol jk tounge.gif

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poopskin

Bullies. Fricking bullies.

So i'm slightly overweight. BIG FRICKING DEAL.

I mean, i know at least 3 other people larger then me but THEY dont get picked on.

And whats the deal with them thinking me liking legos is funny?!? IT'S STILL NOT A BIG DEAL!

 

poopskin walks off and mutters "Bastard"...

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spyro_ie

People who don't know how to use roundabouts. It's not that hard to understand you know!

 

And people who chew loudly. It is the most irritating sound. Sheesh.

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Themanwiththeplan

Teenage f*cking mothers......THE SWINE

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Mandalore.

f*cking Communism...'nuf said. They should all be shot I'm afraid to say. die.gif

 

Oh and most form of religons, hate them.

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richard the pissed
f*cking Facism...'nuf said. They should all be shot I'm afraid to say. die.gif

 

Oh and most form of religons, hate them.

fixed. also note there arn't any left.

 

 

people who insult the car you are restoring. listen dumbf*ck, i'm pretty sure your lada rivia 1300 isn't going to win any awards at shows before mine, and i'm not even at the legal driving age. boil your head.

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Archaon, Lord of End Times

People that get in my way... sneaky2.gif

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omega_c
Whats pissing me off more than anything is all this American comedy crap on TV that people find funny die.gif (admit it Brit comedy is funny as heck, way funnier than that American trash smile.gif ), and they have the ball to put on the flippin' so called audience laughter (which really they press a button to play the same laughter over and over confused.gif ) after 90% of the dialouge which no one finds funny, f*ck OFF! I could pull off funnier comedys out of my ass than that crap.

 

Oh and how is Friends funny? After going on watching the best British sitcoms like Red Dwarf, Little Britain, Blackadder, Monty Python, Dad's Army, One Foot In The Grave, My Family, The Office etc, Friends looks like its been written by an infant comapared to the above Brit sitcoms.

"Well, if you lost your sense of humor, you could always go write for the show Friends"

-Peter Griffin

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Oddsock
People who don't know how to use roundabouts. It's not that hard to understand you know!

 

And people who chew loudly. It is the most irritating sound. Sheesh.

I know. My friend just can't down any kind of liquid without making some gross sound. Recently he was drinking soda while I was on him computer. He's about 3-4 feet away and suddenly I hear:

 

SLUURP GULP SLUUUURP GULP

 

I'm glad he said sorry for it though and didn't do it again, but Christ, loud eaters piss me off.

 

 

Bullies. Fricking bullies.

So i'm slightly overweight. BIG FRICKING DEAL.

I mean, i know at least 3 other people larger then me but THEY dont get picked on.

And whats the deal with them thinking me liking legos is funny?!? IT'S STILL NOT A BIG DEAL!

 

 

That stinks dude, I'm sorry you're bullied. BTW, Legos totally rule. I love them and I don't even use them anymore. They're still just fun to pick up and mess with!

 

On the subject of overweight people, I hate obese or overweight people that don't do anything about their weight. There's this one kid I knew who was told, "Go eat a donut" and he said he hadn't touched one in 8 months. It really surprised me and I respect that. However, there's this one HUGE morbidly obese kid in my school and he still eats Krispy Kremes and shows his casual manner towards his dangerous weight as if he's proud and should be venerated for not caring about being fat. Ugh.

 

 

Teenage f*cking mothers......THE SWINE

While I don't think of them as swine, I do wonder why teens don't use protection. It's so dumb not to...if I ever did it (I am sixteen and still a virgin) I would definitely use protection unless married and wanting to have kids. If you wanna have sex, fine, but be smart.

 

omega_c,

Hah, awesome quote. Seriously, Friends is NOT funny.

 

This is really nerdy, but when people criticize my...enthusiasm with aircraft and warfare, they always try to identify something as an "XPM-12350" or something like that. The first thing that annoys me is their lack of understanding that aircraft and warfare is just my hobby and interest, and also they call out such BS like that...no weapon or aircraft would be called that tounge.gif

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