GTA San Andreas Funny Quotes Thread

[BlaculaDave]

Like the title says, just post some of the hilarious quotes that you hear in-game....and, of course, spoiler tags if needed.

 

 

"Kids LOVE tea-baggin!" - Jack Howitzer on WCTR

[axion]

ped: something like "i was thinkin bout slittin my wrists!"

ped after kicking his ass out of his car: "hey but my chicken is in there!"

 

hahahahha

[smithstock]

Like the title says, just post some of the hilarious quotes that you hear in-game....and, of course, spoiler tags if needed.

 

 

"Kids LOVE tea-baggin!" - Jack Howitzer on WCTR

Correct me if I am wrong. Jack Howitzer is the guy who plays 'Tim in Exploder' in Vice City.

 

Are Opey and Anthony in the game? They have some funny stuff to say

[Dan_1983]

ped: something like "i was thinkin bout slittin my wrists!"

ped after kicking his ass out of his car: "hey but my chicken is in there!"

 

hahahahha

That sounds funny.

But not as funny as my mothers my sister.

[mklvfkwr]

"I love women in uniform".

 

-CHUCK D, PAYBACK radiostation..

[gray0072]

ped says: when your in jail being on top aint gay-lololol

[RCagent]

"do you take drugs mister?"

 

 

"Get your fatass off the road ese!"

 

 

 

"What? No! No..REALLY NO!"

 

"I once took a dump behind a school!"

[BlaculaDave]

 

Like the title says, just post some of the hilarious quotes that you hear in-game....and, of course, spoiler tags if needed.

 

 

"Kids LOVE tea-baggin!" - Jack Howitzer on WCTR

Correct me if I am wrong. Jack Howitzer is the guy who plays 'Tim in Exploder' in Vice City.

 

Are Opey and Anthony in the game? They have some funny stuff to say

Yeah, he's on one of the shows talking about his new movie "Special Needs Cop" where he plays a military officer who takes a job at a Retard School to find drug runners. Hilarity ensues.

Edited October 26, 2004 by BlaculaDave

[Ibere]

Oh I just love the quotes thread!

 

Well, the best one that I heard until now was from a ped:

 

"The backdoor I'm saving for my husband!"

 

hahahaha!

[B1gSm0ke]

FUnniest quote ive heard so far is the one in my sig, Ryder says "Ey take us back to the grove mo f*cka!" Just funny how he says it, what a hata

[dannyh321]

CJ:

 

"Does the Pope shít in the woods?" Quality!

 

Also, OG Locs rap, something about putting a "gun in ya face".......

[Barguast]

"Does the Pope shít in the woods?"

Pfft, that's overused in the game. As are many of the jokes. Compared to the other games I've found the radio and dialogue pretty humourless

[Ahrael]

Heh, there's one I heard CJ saying when a friend and I were on a 2-player rampage. Right as I blasted a cop off his bike with my shotgun, CJ goes: "Oh, so not everyone's having a good time!?"

 

lol

[tokra-selmak]

the sig below from fernando its great

[mrchicken388]

I fell off the tallest building in LS and CJ yells "I hate gravity!"

[Grove_Spike]

 

CJ: "Does the Pope shít in the woods?" Quality!

I love Cesars reply the second time

 

Cesar: "I don't know homes,why do you keep asking me that? What the pope does is his business..."

[gta_nut]

1 whats a gps

2 fail what

3 who the f*ck are you..

 

 

 

Classic!

[Dan_1983]

When some homie said something bad about CJ.

I replied and CJ said: 'Yeah whatever,join the line to bang yo momma'

[.::Burnout]

PED:"sh*t, I'm sucking a roach."

PED:"punk-ass-bitch-mutha-f*cka"

PED:"Steroids make your dick do what?"

CJ to cops: "Imma kill your wife, or your husband, or whatever you have"

Jack Howizter the movie star guy: "welcome to the land of the free, bitches"

[dallasdawg]

In ammunation the guy on the radio is funny as hell............he's like "mother in law bein a bitch show her summthin......and" those fellas whistlin at you at the construction yard, next time whistle BACK" with our high powered rifle his brains will splatterd all over the site.

 

and the inversion therapy thing is hilarious "I used to be terrified of my kids getting hurt, so i stabbed them, it didnt hurt them that bad"

 

, crazy therapist replies, "AMAZING! !!! "

[dallasdawg]

In ammunation the guy on the radio is funny as hell............he's like "mother in law bein a bitch show her summthin......and" those fellas whistlin at you at the construction yard, next time whistle BACK" with our high powered rifle his brains will splatterd all over the site.

 

and the inversion therapy thing is hilarious "I used to be terrified of my kids getting hurt, so i stabbed them, it didnt hurt them that bad"

 

, crazy therapist replies, "AMAZING! !!! "

[Raindancer]

A ped with an English accent commented on CJ's apperance outside the country club in LS

 

"If you was a bird mate, i would jump ya"!! f*cking funny as hell!!

 

Translation - "If you was a lady i would f*ck you"(for those not from the U.K)

[Branney]

Its got to be Mary-Beth Maybell on -Rose talking about putting the harmonica down her pants then going on to give a demonstration.

 

Or a guy on the radio saying something along the lines of "i didnt f*ck my mother, she wouldnt let me"

[bigsmoke]

i love the stuff the people at restaraunts tell you, my favorite is from Cluckin' Bell after you order. "I hope ya choke a doodle do!"

[Hilary_King=#1]

the guy in ammunation: "GOD I SOUND LIKE HOT sh*t IN THAT COMMERCIAL!" hahahaha

[Kippers]

clukin bell the guy says somein like : if your lucky u might find a feather

And clukin bell the guy goes something like : clukal-f*ck.... i can never remember...I'll correct it next time i play

[MAD man]

The spray paint mission. When you walk over to them the Balla says... What the f*ck? It's just the way he says it.

[Cryatome]

There's also something about Catalina's way of saying "I hate men". It's hilarious!

[highfighter]

i jacked this car just now and the driver said

 

oh my god you smell

 

lol funniest thing ive herd so far

[Mafia Righthand_Man]

For some reason I thought it was hilarious when Catalina calls you back after she leaves and calls you PIG!

 

Also this happened the first day I got SA...

 

Ped: Man, did someone die in yo' mouth?!

CJ: You ain't smelling too good either mothaf*cka.

 

Then the guy came at me and I beat his ass.