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MetalGrand

V-Rock's COMPLETE SCRIPT

Recommended Posts

MetalGrand

******

V Rock

******

 

RADIO STATION - 01

VROCK HOSTED BY LAZLOW

Written by ---

Script by Dan Houser and Lazlow Jones

 

01---Kintaro's V Rock Introduction

 

02---Judas Priest’s You’ve got Another Thing Comin’

“V Rock till you drop”

 

03---Love Fist’s Fist Fury

“I flunked school cause I’m hard core!”

 

04---David Lee Roth’s Yankee Rose

“If you can’t wear a spandex jumpsuit, what can you do?”

 

05-–-Twisted Sister’s I Wanna Rock

“This is V Rock?”

 

06---Motley Crue’s Too Young To Fall in Love

“I hope I die before I get old!”

 

07---Commercial 1 – Patriotism

“Make sure you do the American thing!”

 

08---Commercial 2 – Love Fist Tour

“Shot your sons!”

 

09---Quiet Riot’s Cum on Feel the Noise

“Where we’ll peck your eyes out!”

 

10---Commercial 3 – Exploder: Evacuator Part 2

“I’ll cry when I’m done killin!”

 

11---The Cult’s She Sells Sanctuary

“Some mutha-fatha V Rock!”

 

12---Phone call 1: Lazlow versus Cousin Ed

“What’re you like a red neck?”

 

13---Ozzy Osbourne’s Bark at the Moon

“Willy the Vulture is gonna be there handing out sharp objects.”

 

14---Commercial 4 - Maibazu Thunder

“Nights of the road, here’s your stallion!”

 

15---Commercial 5 – Complete the Look

“Wow! You look like a Satanist”

 

16---Love Fist’s Dangerous Bastard

“New wave this pal!”

 

17---Commercial 6 - Ammu-Nation

“Actually used when we whooped Australia’s ass!”

 

18---Iron Maiden’s 2 Minutes to Midnight

“It’s gonna be a “win it before you can pawn it” weekend!”

 

19---Commercial 7 - The Exploder Survival Knife

“That’ll shut you up!”

 

20---Phone call 2: Snow Dog YO!

“Black trash bags that’s classy!”

 

21---Loverboy’s Working for the Weekend

“It’s Lazlow! A. k. a. DJ hard rocker!”

 

22---Phone call 3: Big Mitch Baker, You hear!

“You’ll be crappin hair bands till Christmas! You hear!”

 

23---Alcatrazz’s God Bless Video

“AH! Vets are so cranky!”

 

24---Tesla’s Cumin’ Atcha Live

“If you wake up next to a fat hog in a trailer”

 

25---Autograph’s Turn up the Radio

“Sissy Sprits your perm! That’s pretty cool!”

 

26---Megadeth’s Peace Sells

“Only sissies cry!”

 

27---Commercial 8 - Knife after Dark

“Rated R for retarded”

 

28---Anthrax’s Madhouse

“Well how you gonna learn to party at school mom?!”

 

29---Slayer’s Raining Blood

“I about had with this stupid vulture!”

 

30---FAQ Special: Lazlow gets kicked off the station

"I tell you man you can't stop me right now!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*****************************

Kintaro's V Rock Introduction

*****************************

 

This is what happens when someone has too much time in their hands,

they write the script of their favorite video game. But why write the script

of GTA: VC’s rock radio station? Well because of two reasons. The first is

that I love the songs that are on the station and second I’m a big fan of

Lazlow. Anyway let’s rock!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

*JUDAS PRIEST - YOU’VE GOT ANOTHER THING COMIN’*

 

One life I'm gonna live it up

I'm takin' flight I said I'll never get enough

Stand tall I'm young and kinda proud

I'm on top as long as the music's loud

 

If you think I'll sit around as the world goes by

You're thinkin' like a fool cause it's a case of do or die

Out there is a fortune waitin' to be had

You think I'll let it go you're mad

You've got another thing comin'

You've got another thing comin'

 

That's right here's where the talkin' ends

Well listen, listen this night there'll be some action spent

Drive hard I'm callin' all the shots

I got an ace card comin' down on the rocks

 

If you think I'll sit around while you chip away my brain

Listen I ain't foolin' and you'd better think again

Out there is a fortune waitin' to be had

You think I'll let it go you're mad

You got another thing comin

You got another thing comin'

You got another thing comin'

 

In this world we're livin' in we have our share of sorrow

Answer now is don't give in, aim for a new tomorrow

 

Oh so hot no time to take a rest yeah

Act tough ain't room for second best

Real strong got me some security

Hey I'm a big smash I'm goin' for infinity yeah

 

If you think I'll sit around as the world goes by

You're thinkin' like a fool cause it's a case of do or die

Out there is a fortune waitin' to be had

You think I'll let it go you're mad

You've got another thing comin'

You’ve got another thing comin

You’ve got another thing comin

you’ve got another thing...Owowowow!

You’ve got another thing comin'

Hey comin' now

==============================================================================

 

LAZLOW: V Rock till you drop! God I never get tired of that one! Hey did you

hear that BJ is gonna be coming back to play for the Mambas, that is

unbelievable! You know I only been in Vice City a few months now, but it’s

clear to me that my opinion is really important to you!

 

MALE ANNOUCER: New wave this pal! We’re the one and only V Rock!

 

(Love Fist's Fist Fury begins playing)

 

LAZLOW: Don’t forget Love Fist are in town right now... Love Fist is in

town... whatever I flunked school cause I’m hard core!

==============================================================================

 

*LOVE FIST - FIST FURY*

 

Here we go again

Cruisin in the right side of town

Where the chicks taste like candy, but all the guys look like clowns

Yea! Here’s what I’m gonna do

I’m gonna get and fix some of the best

Driving by in my Porscha, down in the roadhouse to get us some

 

Love Fist fury, we’re just getting pussy

Our love rockets are too aroused

The girls are going crazy cause we ain't getting lazy

Shooting love fist fuel all around

 

Six A. M. on the morning after the beast rest up for awhile

Last night saw some ugly fighting brawl

Because the badge mustn’t want us in town

I said “come on guys chill for awhile, join us in our Fist world”

Thank god the badge chose the Love Fist for a drunken crazy wild

 

Love Fist fury, checkin out all the pussy

Let your love rockets do all the rounds

The girls are going crazy, tonight is getting hazy

Shooting love fist fuel from their mouths

 

Love Fist fury, we’re just getting pussy

Our love rockets are too aroused

The girls are going crazy cause we ain't getting lazy

Shooting love fist fuel all around

 

Love Fist fury, we’re just getting pussy

Our love rockets are too aroused

The girls are going crazy cause we ain't getting lazy

Shooting love fist fuel all around

 

Love Fist fury, we’re just getting pussy

Our love rockets are too aroused

The girls are going crazy cause we ain't getting lazy

Shooting love fist fuel all around

 

Love Fist fury, we’re just getting pussy

Our love rockets are too aroused

The girls are going crazy cause we ain't getting lazy

Shooting love fist fuel all around

==============================================================================

 

MALE ANNOUCER: V Rock! (Echo)

==============================================================================

 

*DAVID LEE ROTH - YANKEE ROSE*

 

What? Well, let me roll up on to the

Sidewalk and take a look

Yes, Whoa! She's beautiful

I'm talkin' about a Yankee Rose

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha and she looks wild, wild, wild, wild!

 

Are you ready for the new sensation?

Well, here's the shot heard 'round the world.

All you backroom boys salute when her flag unfurls.

Well, guess who's back in circulation?

Now, I don't know what you may have heard

but what I need right now's the original goodtime girl.

 

She's a vision from coast to coast, (coast to coast)

sea to shining sea. (sea to shining sea)

Hey, sister, you're perfect host. (Make a toast)

 

Show me your bright lights and your city lights, all right.

I'm talkin' 'bout the Yankee Rose.

Bright lights in your city lights, all right.

I'm talkin' 'bout it.

 

When she walks, watch, the sparks will fly,

firecrackin' on the fourth of July.

No sad songs tonight, something's in the air. (Do you feel like this?)

She's a real state of independents.

So pretty when her rockets glare,

still provin' any night that her flag is still there.

 

She's a vision from coast to coast, (coast to coast)

sea to shining sea. (sea to shining sea)

Hey, sister, you're perfect host. (Make a toast)

 

Show me your bright lights and your city lights, all right.

I'm talkin' 'bout the Yankee Rose.

Bright lights in your city lights, all right.

I'm in love with the Yankee Rose.

 

Ah, she's beautiful, alright,

mm, nothin' like her in the whole world.

Yeah, she's right on time, I'm on the case.

Pick up the phone, no time to waste.

She got the beat and here's a little bit comin' your way.

 

Oh raise 'em up there

Let's see who salutes baby

Little bit, little bit, little bit higher

Here's the National Anthem

Swing 'em from here

I wanna get

A little bit of apple pie man

 

Bright lights, city lights...

Bright lights, city lights...

==============================================================================

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: If you can’t wear a spandex jumpsuit, what can you do? This

is V Rock!

==============================================================================

 

*TWISTED SISTER – I WANNA ROCK*

 

I wanna rock! (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

I want to rock (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

 

Turn it down you say,

Well all I got to say to you is time, time again I say, "No!"

No! No, No, No, No, No!

Tell me not to play

Well, all I got to say to you when you tell me not to play,

I say, "No!"

No! No, No, No, No, No!

So, if you ask me why I like the way I play it

There's only one thing I can say to you

 

I wanna rock! (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

I want to rock (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

 

There's a feelin' that

I get from nothin' else and there ain't nothin' in the world

That makes me go!

Go! Go, go, go, go, go!

Turn the power up

I've waited for so long so I could hear my favorite song so,

Let's go!

Go! Go, go, go, go, go!

When it's like this I feel the music shootin' through me

There's nothin' else that I would rather do

 

I wanna rock! (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

I want to rock (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

 

I wanna rock! (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

I want to rock (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

I wanna rock!

 

I wanna rock! (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

I want to rock (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

 

I wanna rock! (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

I wanna rock! (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

Rock (Rock)

I want to rock (Rock)

==============================================================================

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: The 100% official home of rebellion! V Rock!

 

LAZLOW: Alright we got some more rock lined up for ya. But wait! One moment!

I...I think you rather listen to me talk for a while first. That’s what you

get on V Rock, rock and roll and me. I’m not sure which I prefer. Here’s the

Crue.

==============================================================================

 

*MOTLEY CRUE - TOO YOUNG TO FALL IN LOVE*

 

You say our love

Is like dynamite

Open your eyes

it's like fire and ice

Well you're killing me

Your love's a guillotine

Why don't you just set me free

 

Too Young To Fall in Love (Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Too young to fall in love)

 

(Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Too young to fall in love)

 

Run for the hills

We’re both sinners and saints

Not a woman, but a whore

Oh I can taste the hate

Well now I'm killing you

Watch your face turning blue

Not yet a man

Just a punk in the street

 

Too Young To Fall in Love (Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (to fall in love)

 

(Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Much too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Too young to fall in love)

 

You say our love

Is like dynamite

its no surprise

you've got one-way eyes

Well you're killing me

Your love's a guillotine

Not yet a man

Just a punk in the street

 

Too Young To Fall in Love (Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (to fall in love)

 

(Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Much too young)

==============================================================================

 

LAZLOW: Thanks guys! That one rocks!

 

(Oh I’m too young)

Too Young To Fall in Love (Too young to fall in love)

 

LAZLOW: Here on V Rock the home of the vulture in Vice City. The Vulture is

our mascot, which we need because those idiots, the retards, the guys that

wear the suits in marketing think I can’t carry this station on my own. Well

you’re wrong! I hope I die before I get old! I’m sure I will thanks to this

life of excess I lead.

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: V Rock! For people who wear nametags to work.

******************************************************************************

 

*PATRIOTISM (COMMERCIAL)*

 

MALE VOICE: What makes a real American? A cowboy hat? Enjoying a fine T-bone

steak? Going to a baseball game? Shooting a gun? Maybe it’s the freedom to go

into a poor country and tell them how to do things?! Heh! Those are all great

qualities! But one thing that makes a true patriot is the ability to choose

an American car! When you buy an import you take a hot meal off a hard

working American’s table. (Baby cries) There, there! This poor girl is going

to starve to death, just because you bought a cheaper, more efficient

Maibazu. Without gross symbols of excess, what will Americans have to look up

to? Our great industries is a threaten! Cars, pornography, armaments! And

they need your help! So the next time you buy a car, a piece of adult

literature or a missile defense system! Make sure you do the American thing!

 

_____________________________________________________________________________

 

*LOVE FIST (Commercial)*

 

V ROCK’S MALE ANNOUNCER: Lock up your daughters! (Door is slammed then

locked) Shoot your sons!

 

BOY: Dad! (Gun fires)

 

V ROCK’S MALE ANNOUNCER: Because Love Fist is coming to town! (Fist, fist,

fist till morning) The world tour that has been ban through out the world

comes to Vice City. The monsters of rock and roll excess, Love Fist! (The

girls are going crazy cause we are getting lazy shooting love fist fuel all

around) Get ready for a night of death metal love ballads that’ll have you

shoving your fist in the air! It’s the steel hearts, stone cold prostate

tour! Brought to you by Giggle Cream, because dessert should be funny! And

the Maibazu Thunder, because after you get struck by lighting (Lighting

noise) there’s thunder! Come see the pounding rock from the band that brought

you hits like “Shin Stainer”, “Liver Buster” and “Dangerous Man Dead Family”.

Come get love fisted! Love Fist at the Vice City arena! Brought to you by V

Rock!

******************************************************************************

 

LAZLOW: Welcome back you’re listening to V Rock. Let’s get on with the rock

and roll! I’m Lazlow, Enjoy this one. It’s really special.

==============================================================================

 

*QUIET RIOT - CUM ON FEEL THE NOISE*

 

Cum on feel the noise

Girls rock your boys

We’ll get wild, wild, wild,

Wild, wild, wild,

 

So you think I got an evil mind,

I'll tell you honey

I don't know why

I don't know why

 

So you think my singing's out of time,

It makes me money

I don't know why

I don't know why anymore

Oh no

 

So cum on feel the noise

Girls rock your boys

We’ll get wild, wild, wild,

Wild, wild, wild,

Cum on feel the noise

Girls rock your boys

We’ll get wild, wild, wild,

Aoooooooo

 

So you say I got a funny face,

I got no worries

And I don't know why

I don't know why

 

I'm a scruff bag well it's no disgrace,

I’m in no hurry

And I don't know why

I don't know why anymore

No, no, no

 

So cum on feel the noise

Girls rock your boys

We’ll get wild, wild, wild,

Wild, wild, wild,

Cum on feel the noise

Girls rock your boys

We’ll get wild, wild, wild,

Wild, wild (Come on!)

 

Well you think we have a lazy time,

You should know better

I don't know why

I don't know why

 

So you say I got a dirty mind,

I'm a mean go getter

I don't know why

I don't know why anymore

Oh no

 

Cum on feel the noise

Girls rock your boys

We’ll get wild, wild, wild,

Wild, wild, wild,

 

Cum on feel the noise

Girls rock your boys

We’ll get wild, wild, wild,

Oooooh

 

Cum on, feel it

Girls rock your boys

We'll get wild, wild, wild, (We’re gonna get wild)

Wild, wild, wild,

Cum on feel the noise (rock it tonight)

Girls rock your boys

We’ll get wild,

==============================================================================

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: The home of rebellion and the Vulture (squawk)! This is V

Rock! Where rock and roll reign supreme! Where we’ll peck your eyes out!

 

LAZLOW: This is the 100% official home of rebellion with me Lazlow. The rebel

rouser, hell raiser in chief! That’s right! I’am the master of darkness!

That’s why my name’s Lazlow.

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: It’s Lazlow on V Rock! The home of all rebellion! Will be

right back!

******************************************************************************

 

*EXPLODER: EVACUATOR PART 2 (COMMERCIAL)*

 

NARRATOR: He was a man of peace, living on a quiet farm in North Dakota. Till

one day all hell broke loose! (Gun shots are heard)

 

SOLDIER: Tim we need you!

 

TIM: I’m a man of peace, I’m done killing! I wanna raise a family!

 

SOLDIER: That’s just it Tim! They got your family!

 

TIM: Nooooooooooo!

 

NARRATOR: Jack Howitzer is Tim in Exploder! From the heart of America to the

jungles of Cambodia, follow one man’s quest for peace.

 

TIM: Hoochi Vet is that you?

 

HOOCHI: Tim I know you come! Just like old days we kill everybody!

(Helicopter is heard)

 

SOLDIER: Tim they got your wife!

 

TIM: But I’m not married!

 

SOLDIER: You are now to America!

 

NARRATOR: He went in to save his country, but found his family and lost a

friend. (Gun shot)

 

TIM: Hoochi!

 

HOOCHI: Tim don’t leave me! You thought me baseball game and how to laugh!

 

TIM: Nooooooooooo! He would have been a fine American. I’ll cry when I’m done

killin!

 

NARRATOR: Get your self a body bag, strap your self in, start making friends

the American way! Exploder: Evacuator Part 2! Rated PG may include patriotic

garbage.

******************************************************************************

 

LAZLOW: Hey it’s V Rock! All the rock you want and some you don’t. I know

what the people want! Some mutha-fatha V Rock!

 

==============================================================================

 

*THE CULT - SHE SELLS SANCTUARY*

 

Oh the heads that turn

Make my back burn

And those heads that turn

Make my back, make my back burn

 

The sparkle in your eyes

Keeps me alive

And the sparkle in your eyes

Keeps me alive, keeps me alive

The world and the world turns around

The world and the world ya hear

The world drags me down

 

Oh the heads that turn

Make my back burn

And those heads that turn

Make my back, make my back burn

Yeah

 

The fire in your eyes

Keeps me alive

And the fire in your eyes

Keeps me alive

I'm sure in her you'll find

The sanctuary

I'm sure in her you'll find

The sanctuary

And the world

The world turns around

And the world and the world

The world drags me down

And the world and the world and the world

The world drags me down

And the world and the world and the world and the world

The world drags me down

 

And the world

And the world turns around

And the world and the world

Yeah the world drags me down

And the world

Yeah the world turns around

And the world and the world

The world drags me down

==============================================================================

 

JEZZ TORRENT: This is Jezz Torrent from Love Fist. If you wanna take on the

chin, you’ll remain listening to V Rock.

 

LAZLOW: Vice City’s home of rock and roll for 75 years. Let’s go to the V-

line. Hello you’re on V Rock.

 

ED: Dude! You took my job alright! I..I...I got a major beef with you!

 

LAZLOW: Who is this?

 

ED: Ed! Maybe you remember me! Now I’m out driving a bus, standing on

unemployment lines getting yelled at by my wife because I don’t make enough

money!

 

LAZLOW: Look man! The station is taking another direction. It’s heading in

like in a new direction, it happens to be a Lazlow direction.

 

ED: No! It’s not a new direction, it’s a cheap direction! They’re saving

money on you! You are cheap! Lazlow equals cheap!

 

LAZLOW: Listen this is rock and roll man! It comes and it goes! It’s better

to burn out than fade away!

 

ED: So-you’re calling me a burn out! Is that what you’re saying?!

 

LAZLOW: Well I heard you applied for this job with a resume written on

rolling papers, come on!

 

ED: Yea-and you sent yours in hand written calligraphy with a bouquet

flowers. That’s not rock and roll man! Rock and roll is a life style! You got

to live it, you got to know! You don’t know a damn thing about music! Twisted

Sister “I Wanna Rock” I came up with those profound lyrics, I helped Dee!

Autograph “Turn up the Radio”! Their talking about me man! Turn up the radio,

turn up Cousin Ed! What’s the mascot’s name for Iron Maiden? Do you even

know? Give me a clue!

 

LAZLOW: Listen dude! First off, Cousin Ed is a really weak radio name!

What’re you like a red neck?

 

ED: Wha-What did you do? Let me ask you about high school! Did…Were you in

the high school band?

 

LAZLOW: No!

 

ED: You were in the band? Weren’t you?

 

LAZLOW: yes!

 

ED: Yea! While you were learning the Star Spangle Banner, I was in a garage

drummin to Def Leppard songs!

 

LAZLOW: Ah listen; I know who the mascot for Iron Maiden is!

 

ED: Who!?

 

LAZLOW: It’s a puppy!

 

ED: No! His name is Eddy! Cousin Eddy, Where do you think it came from?

Cousin Ed! Eddy! Iron Maiden! Put two and two together my friend!

 

LAZLOW: Listen that was old rock! This is new rock man! You got to step aside!

 

ED: New rock! I don’t even use the playlist! You probably have a playlist; I

rolled mine into a big fatty and smoked it!

 

LAZLOW: Listen! I’m a rock station DJ ok! Let’s get some rock severed up!

This is V Rock!

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: V Rock!

==============================================================================

 

*OZZY OSBOURNE - BARK AT THE MOON*

 

Screams break the silence

Waking from the dead of night

Vengeance is boiling

He's returned to kill the light

Then when he's found who he's looking for

Listen in awe and you'll hear him

 

Bark at the moon

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha...

 

Years spent in torment

Buried in a nameless grave

Now he has risen

Miracles would have to save

Those that the beast is looking for

Listen in awe and you'll hear him

 

Bark at the moon

Hey yeah, bark at the moon

 

They cursed and buried him along with shame

And thought his timeless soul had gone (gone)

In empty burning hell - unholy one

But he's returned to prove them wrong (so wrong)

Ooh, yeah baby

 

Howling in shadows

Living in a lunar spell

He finds his heaven

Spewing from the mouth of hell

Those that the beast is looking for

Listen in awe and you'll hear him

 

Bark at the moon

Hey yeah, bark at the moon

Hey yeah, bark at the moon

Oh, oh yeah, bark at the moon

Hooooooooowl!

==============================================================================

 

LAZLOW: Yea! Hey don’t forget this weekend, all weekend long it’s a crash and

burn weekend! Willy the Vulture is gonna be there handing out sharp objects.

It is gonna rock! We’re gonna have to take a break right now. But we’ll be

back in a few short seconds and maybe even give you an opportunity to win a

vulture T-shirt. Don’t go away!

******************************************************************************

 

*MAIBAZU THUNDER (COMMERCIAL)*

 

(Car engine is turned on)

MALE VOICE: Nights of the road, here’s your stallion! (Horse whinny)

The car for freedom! (Freedom) The car for hot excitement! (Excitement) The

car for a man who’s alone against the elements! (The Maibazu Thunder)The

pride is back! It’s the power of a compact! (It looks small but it’s so big)

Fuel injected! (Inject me) Maibazu Thunder! On the tall road of life, you

have to pay to prove you can! Live the emotion of an individual! (Thunder)

The awesome power of nature, distill into one vehicle! (Wow) Because after

you get struck by lighting (Lighting noise) there’s thunder! (The Maibazu

Thunder)

 

______________________________________________________________________________

 

*COMPLETE THE LOOK (COMMERCIAL)*

 

MALE VOICE: Feather hair, pentagram necklace, something missing? (Complete

the look) Complete the look with a pair of crotch hugging, slightly too

short, acid wash, skin tight jeans at Vice City’s one stop shop for the rebel

who sets his own style! (Wow! You look like a Satanist) Complete the look!

******************************************************************************

==============================================================================

 

*LOVE FIST – DANGEROUS BASTARD*

 

Yell

Ahhhhhhhhh!

Yell!

Come on now!

Let me see ya!

 

Well, I'm a dangerous bastard

And I am bullet-proof

I take life as a lesson

Sometimes I get flu

The devil looks into my eye

And he makes my voice go high

Is there nothing in these eyes

That I need to know

 

Is it true you like my curl

Do you think we look like girls

Would it cause a section block

If you saw our great big socks

 

Ahhhhhhhh!

Let me see ya

 

I keep drivin' faster

Goin through the roof

I wanna run a delicatessen

That don't make me a poof

Action, camera, lipstick lights

I fit in Mercedes's tights

No one knows that I play guitar

Wearing her red bra

 

Is it true you like my curl

Do you think we look like girls

Would it cause a section block

If you saw our great big socks

 

Thank you, thank you

Good Evening

==============================================================================

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: New wave this pal! We’re the one and only V Rock!

******************************************************************************

 

*AMMU-NATION (COMMERCIAL)*

 

MALE VOICE: The store leading the fight against communism is having a blow

out sale! Ammu-Nation has a wide array of peacemakers! Come by Ammu-Nation on

Militia-Mondays, exercise your second Amendment right and get 10% off all

armor piercing bullets. We’re the only gun store that let’s you try before

you buy it! Need anti-tank missile? We’ve got’em! Flamethrowers? Oh yeah!

No credit, no problem! No money down, 90 days, same as cash. Shot now, pay

later! If you’re in the 10 minute waiting period fire off a few rounds at the

Ammu-Nation gun range, featuring faces of commies paint coats! Come by

Ammu-Nation and register to win an anti-aircraft gun actually used when we

whooped Australia’s ass! This weekend is the Ammu-Nation Film Festival with

free screening of the documentary Red Dawn! Ammu-Nation protecting your

rights!

******************************************************************************

 

LAZLOW: Hey here’s another track! Remember it’s gonna be a “win it before you

can pawn it” weekend! I love to give stuff away at this radio station,

especially if the record company gave it to us in exchange to play their

songs. Rock and roll!

==============================================================================

 

*IRON MAIDEN – 2 MINUTES TO MIDNIGHT*

 

Kill for gain or shoot to maim

But we don't need a reason

The Golden Goose is on the loose

And never out of season

Some blackened pride still burns inside

This shell of bloody treason

Here's my gun for a barrel of fun

For the love of living death.

 

The killer's breed or the demon's seed,

The glamour, the fortune, the pain,

Go to war again, blood is freedom's stain,

But don't you pray for my soul anymore.

2 minutes to midnight

The hands that threaten doom.

2 minutes to midnight

To kill the unborn in the womb.

 

The blind men shout let the creatures out

We'll show the unbelievers

The napalm screams of human flames

Of a prime time Belsen feast...YEAH!

As the reasons for the carnage cut their meat and lick the gravy,

We oil the jaws of the war machine and feed it with our babies.

 

The killer's breed or the demon's seed,

The glamour, the fortune, the pain,

Go to war again, blood is freedom's stain,

But don't you pray for my soul anymore.

2 minutes to midnight

The hands that threaten doom.

2 minutes to midnight

To kill the unborn in the womb.

 

The body bags and little rags of children torn in two

And the jellied brains of those who remain to put the finger right on you.

As the madmen play on words and make us all dance to their song,

To the tune of starving millions to make a better kind of gun.

 

The killer's breed or the demon's seed,

The glamour, the fortune, the pain,

Go to war again, blood is freedom's stain,

But don't you pray for my soul anymore.

2 minutes to midnight

The hands that threaten doom.

2 minutes to midnight

To kill the unborn in the womb.

Midnight..

==============================================================================

 

LAZLOW: I’ll tell ya, I must be having a bad hair day today. I mean I live

that life of a rock n roll DJ 24/7! So sometime I’m not looking all that

great and wake up in weird places but I always look moody. So anyway today

check this out, I got turn down for a date by a waitress! Can you believe

that! I mean who would turn down me for a date? You’re a waitress baby! Not a

megastar! Bring me some ketchup honey! Some people just don’t know talent

when they see it or hear it!

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: While other stations are playing this! (Harp plays) We’re

playing this! (Guitar plays) V Rock!

 

LAZLOW: We’re gonna take a break and then hit the phones really hard with are

heads! Oh yea! And remember if your request is on our playlist, I might just

play it if you call in.

******************************************************************************

 

*THE EXPLODER SURVIVAL KNIFE (COMMERCIAL)*

 

MALE VOICE: It’s the knife that saved America! If you liked the film

Exploder, you’ll love this enormous commemorate survival knife! In the handle

you’ll find all the things you’ll need in any wilderness, disasters situation

or the jungle of your backyard! It comes complete with fishing line, needle

and thread for sowing gashes back together and an incredible useful endurable

toothpick!

 

HOOCHI: Tim go on with out me! I got taffy stuck in tooth!

 

TIM: It’s ok Hoochi! Try this! (Knife noise)

 

MALE VOICE: For those unplanned extended stays in the jungle, there’s a saw

for building your own hut, toilet paper and a fold out woman for company!

As well as a serrated blade that can kill a man before he can scream!

 

MAN: (Knife is swung) Aggh..

 

TIM: That’ll shut you up!

 

MALE: The Exploder Survival Knife! It’s the knife that saved America! Now it

can save you!

 

TIM: This knife killed 25 thousand people in Cambodia, now you can too!

******************************************************************************

 

LAZLOW: Be sure to stop by Complete the Look to shoplift your self a V Rock

vulture t-shirt, they kick ass! Alright going to the phones! Who’s this?

 

SNOW DOG: Yo man this is Snow Dog!

 

LAZLOW: Snow Dog? What kinda name is that?!

 

SNOW DOG: Yo! You’re one to ask LAZLOW!

 

LAZLOW: I mean it’s just kinda weird, I mean especially since there’s no snow

in Vice City. Anyway! What are you doing out there today Snow Dog?!

 

SNOW DOG: Yo I’m gonna wallpaper my room with black trash bags!

 

LAZLOW: Black trash bags that’s classy! Make sure you spray paint V Rock

across it your mom will love that one! Here’s some more nonstop help me I’m

unemployed rock!

 

(Loverboy's Working for the Weekend starts to play)

 

JEZZ TORRENT: I'm Jezz Torrent and this is V Rock! Keep on rockin!

==============================================================================

 

*LOVERBOY – WORKING FOR THE WEEKEND*

 

Everyone's watching, to see what you will do

Everyone's looking at you, oh

Everyone's wondering, will you come out tonight

Everyone's trying to get it right, get it right

 

Everybody's working for the weekend

Everybody wants a little romance

Everybody's goin' off the deep end

Everybody needs a second chance, oh

You want a piece of my heart

You better start from the start

You wanna be in the show

Come on baby lets go

 

Everyone's looking to see if it was you

Everyone wants you to come through

Everyone's hoping it'll all work out

Everyone's waiting they're holding out

 

Everybody's working for the weekend

Everybody wants a little romance

Everybody's goin' off the deep end

Everybody needs a second chance, oh

You want a piece of my heart

You better start from the start

You wanna be in the show

Come on baby lets go

Hey!

 

You want a piece of my heart

You better start from the start

You wanna be in the show

Come on baby lets go!

You want a piece of my heart

You better start from the start

You wanna be in the show

Come on baby lets go!

==============================================================================

 

LAZLOW: Alright! It’s Lazlow on V Rock! Let’s go to the V-phones! Hello it’s

your big day; you’re on live with Lazlow!

 

MITCH BAKER: Hey son! Who is this?

 

LAZLOW: Ah...Umm... It’s Lazlow! A. k. a. DJ hard rocker!

 

MITCH BAKER: I’m glad to hear it, but I thought this was a rock station son!

And all I’m hearing is girl’s music! What’re you doin? You got personal

problems you sort’em out son! But don’t drag the rest of us down with ya, you

hear!

 

LAZLOW: Now-now hold on pal! I’m playing the best music in Vice City!

 

MITCH BAKER: No! You hold on son! This is Mitch Baker here! Big Mitch Baker!

You play something hard real soon or I’m gonna come by the station and shove

that sissy soft rock crap so far down your throat, you’ll be crappin hair

bands till Christmas! You hear!

 

LAZLOW: Ahhh...Ok!

 

MITCH BAKER: Cause I didn’t fight, and maim and kill for this damn country,

so I can hear grown men abusing the uniform of long hair and leather with

this damn awful wailing! I wanna rock! Now good day sir.

 

LAZLOW: AH! Vets are so cranky! If you don’t like the music start your own

radio station. It’s easy!

==============================================================================

 

*ALCATRAZZ - GOD BLESS VIDEO*

 

Lets take a plane and go somewhere exotic

To play with a non-descript song

We'll shoot all the crotch shots for 12 year old hopefuls

To make you a real man my son

Ahhhh real man my son

 

Some cheap kid from Birmingham

Blessed with an accent

That pours like the darkest brown ale

Just one more puppet, piss elegant marionette

He's just a fast buck for sale

Ahhhh fast buck for sale

 

Don't you know that God blessed video

We know that God blessed video

 

Break out the cameras that re-shape my face

And get someone to carve up my hair

If you can't beat them, you might as well join 'em

And be glad to say you were there

Ahhhh say you were there

 

Don't you know that God blessed video

We know that God blessed video

We know that God blessed video

 

Don't you know that God blessed video

We know that God blessed video

We know that God blessed video

==============================================================================

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: If you wake up next to a fat hog in a trailer, you’re livin

the life of V Rock! (Oink, oink)

==============================================================================

 

*TESLA - CUMIN’ ATCHA LIVE*

 

Ow!

I'm a mean machine; I'm the kind you don't wanna meet

My middle name is trouble; I'm a danger in the street

My motors in overdrive, I got my pedal to the floor

Never get enough, always comin' back for more yeah yeah

 

Here I come, better step aside

Here I come, I'm comin' atcha live, comin' atcha live

 

I'm the one you want, I never give a warning twice

Anything could happen like the rollin' of the dice - now!

Here I come, you better step aside

Here I come, comin' atcha live

 

Comin' at you live, comin' atcha live

Comin' at you live, comin' atcha live

Comin' at you live, oh here I come

Come on!

 

Comin' at you live, I'm comin' atcha live

Comin' at you live, comin' atcha live

Comin' at you live, oh here I come

Comin' at you live, step aside, oh step aside

Ow! Ow! Oh yeah, here I come, here I come!

==============================================================================

 

LAZLOW: Alright welcome back! Comin up we got a special treat for you! The

Lazlow mega-music marathon! Where I play two records back to back and then

some commercials and then two more records!

 

(Autograph’s Turn up the Radio starts to play)

 

LAZLOW: Oh yeah! And remember if you wanna get a great new hair style,

Sissy Sprits is probably the way to go. Either that or a perm... or both.

Sissy Sprits your perm! That’s pretty cool! That’s what I got and it works

for me! Anyway it’s time for Lazlow mega-music marathon! Let’s start off with

this one.

==============================================================================

 

*AUTOGRAPH - TURN UP THE RADIO*

 

Turn it up!

Yeah!

I'm working hard, you're working too

We do it every day

For every minute I have to work

I need a minute of play

Day in day out all week long

Things go better with rock

The only time I turn it down

Is when I'm sleepin it off

 

Turn up the radio

I need the music, gimmie some more

Turn up the radio

I wanna feel it got to gimmie some more

 

Now listen!

I wanna shake, I wanna dance

So count it off a-one two three

I feel the beat, I'm in a trance

No better place to be

Daytime night-time, anytime

Things go better with rock

I'm goin' twenty four hours a day

I can't seem to stop

 

Turn up the radio

I need the music, gimmie some more

Turn up the radio

I wanna feel it got to gimmie some more

Turn up the radio

I wanna feel it got to gimmie some more

 

Turn up the radio

I need the music, gimmie some more

Yeah!

Turn up the radio

I wanna feel it got to gimmie some more

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Turn up the radio

Come on!

I need the music, gimmie some more

Everybody

Turn up the radio

Turn it up!

I wanna feel it got to gimmie some more

(Whoooooooooooooooooooo!)

Turn up the radio

Turn it up!

I need the music, gimmie some more

(Gimmie some more)

Turn up the radio

______________________________________________________________________________

 

*MEGADETH - PEACE SELLS*

 

What do you mean, "I don't believe in God"?

I talk to him every day.

What do you mean, "I don't support your system"?

I go to court when I have to.

What do you mean, "I can't get to work on time"?

I got nothing better to do

And, what do you mean, "I don't pay my bills"?

Why do you think I'm broke? Huh?

 

If there's a new way,

I'll be the first in line.

But, it better work this time.

 

What do you mean, "I hurt your feelings"?

I didn't know you had any feelings.

What do you mean, "I ain't kind"?

I'm just not your kind.

What do you mean, "I couldn't be president, of the United States of America"?

Tell me something, it's still "We the people", right?

 

If there's a new way

I'll be the first in line,

But, it better work this time.

 

Can you put a price on peace?

Peace,

Peace sells,

Peace,

Peace sells,

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

 

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

Peace sells, but who's buying?

No, peace sells...

Peace sells

==============================================================================

 

MALE ANNOUNCER: Only sissies cry! (Boo, woo) Real men stand in the rain and

listen to this! (Thunder noise) V, V, V, V, V, V Rock!

******************************************************************************

 

*KNIFE AFTER DARK (COMMERCIAL)*

 

MALE VOICE: He was just the boy next door…

 

OLD MAN: Hi! Well hello there Danny! I didn’t know it was hockey season.

 

BOY: Hey can I borrow a knife!

 

MALE VOICE: A deadly curse, a deranged killer, a small town in tears! Knife

After Dark rated R for Retarded.

******************************************************************************

 

LAZLOW: You know if one more mom calls complaining, “My son listened to your

station then he flunked out of school wah, wah, wah!” Well how you gonna

learn to party at school mom?!

 

MALE ANNOUCER: V Rock!

 

LAZLOW: And now for part two of the music marathon! Hold on tight!

==============================================================================

 

*ANTHRAX – MADHOUSE*

 

White coats to bind me, out of control

I live alone inside my mind

World of confusion, air filled with noise

Who says that my life's such a crime?

 

Trapped, in this nightmare

I wish I'd wake

As my whole life begins to shake

Four walls surround me

An empty gaze

I can't find my way out of this maze

 

'Cause I don't care

Fall in, fall out

Gone without a doubt, help me!

I can't take the blame

They don't feel the shame

 

It's a Madhouse

Or so they claim

It's a Madhouse

Oh, am I insane?

 

My fears behind me, what can I do

My dreams haunt my sleep at night

Oh no, won't learn their lesson, white fills my eyes

And only then they see the light

 

Trapped, in this nightmare

I wish I'd wake

As my whole life begins to shake

Four walls surround me

An empty gaze

I can't find my way out of this maze

 

'Cause I don't care

Fall in, fall out

Gone without a doubt, help me!

I can't take the blame

They don't feel the shame

 

It's a Madhouse

Or so they claim

It's a Madhouse

Oh, am I insane?

 

Trapped, in this nightmare

I wish I'd wake

As my whole life begins to shake

Four walls surround me

An empty gaze

I can't find my way out of this maze

 

'Cause I don't care

Fall in, fall out

Gone without a doubt, help me!

I can't take the blame

They don't feel the shame

 

It's a Madhouse

Or so they claim

It's a Madhouse

Oh, am I insane?

______________________________________________________________________________

 

*SLAYER - RAINING BLOOD*

 

Trapped in purgatory

A lifeless object, alive

Awaiting reprisal

Death will be their acquisition

 

The sky is turning red

Return to power draws near

Fall into me, the sky's crimson tears

Abolish the rules made of stone

 

Pierced from below, souls of my treacherous past

Betrayed by many, now ornaments dripping above

 

Awaiting the hour of reprisal

Your time slips away

 

Raining blood

From a lacerated sky

Bleeding its horror

Creating my structure

Now I shall reign in blood!

(Lighting followed by rain)

==============================================================================

 

LAZLOW: You know I chose those two myself! I’m sick of people calling up and

saying I don’t have a passion for music and that I have a face for radio.

What’s that about?!

 

MALE ANNOUCER: While other station’s listeners are at school, (Piano plays)

we’re shoplifting! (Guitar plays) V Rock! (Echo)

 

LAZLOW: I about had with this stupid vulture! He gets more air time than I

do! Who cares about a stupid bird!

 

*FAQ SPECIAL: LAZLOW GETS KICKED OFF THE ROCK STATION*

 

LAZLOW: So hey! How did I do? Do I sound ok? Hey! Do..do I look ok? What do

you think? I got a meet this girl later and check this out, she's dating my

best friend! Heh-how cool is that? I tell you man, you can't stop me right

now! Since I got this gig, I'm a one man-rocking-love-machine! LAZLOW is

unquenchable! I've had so many chicks this month, most of them can't even

remember! And I gotta ask for a raise, I need more money if doing this sort

of thing in a studio. I'm the star of the show man! All they say to me is

"Talk more about the vulture, say the vulture'll peck your eyes out!" screw

the vulture man! I'm a about rock n roll! How many chicks did the vulture get

last week? I hate that freakin vulture! I'am the star, and they think they

can get away with paying me less than the guy who's job I took! I'm Lazlow

man!...What was that?....Wha-I can't hear you!...Then turn the mic off geez!

....Sorry didn't mean to polute your studio!....WHAT?! stop talking?!...But

that's my job!...(Lazlow's voice is now heard away from the mic) Oh yea! if

I weren't a rocker can I do this? (Glass is shattered) Oh yea! I've trashed

hotel rooms! Oh yea I'm whacked on cough syrup man! Ohhh! Watch out for me!

Yea ohhh! Ok, I'll leave, I'll leave!... Yea!

==============================================================================

==============================================================================

==============================================================================

Edited by MetalGrand

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Wolf68k

Question: Why not just link to the one that can already be found at GameFAQs GTA:VC? You can find all of the radio scripts there plus cut scenes' script.

Edited by wolf68k

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Long Haired Freaky Guy
Question: Why not just link to the one that can already be found at GameFAQs GTA:VC? You can find all of the radio scripts there plus cut scenes' script.

My guess is that he actually did get this off of Gamefaqs, just the way it is aligned. GFAQ's only allow a certain amount of characters per line, so this looks like it has been ripped from there.

 

And if someone requested it, why not just send it to the person who requested it Via PM or Email?

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anus
Why isn't this locked already? I'm pretty sure this is from GameFaqs.

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MetalGrand

 

Question: Why not just link to the one that can already be found at GameFAQs GTA:VC? You can find all of the radio scripts there plus cut scenes' script.

Because someone sent the page (The Script) by PM and then someone else requested it so, I didn't know about the page.

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anus
You don't know who sent it? And don't post everything which people send you confused.gif.

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MetalGrand
You don't know who sent it? And don't post everything which people send you confused.gif.

I do know who sent it, but some guy requested it and I forgot the guy's name that had requested this "Script".

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