So basically Death Wish? Gotcha. Seriously though, I need to go on a Cage binge some time, at least I know which ones to track down when the time comes.
Oh, and turns out that Robo Vampire has not one, but TWO sequels, sort of (reviewed here and here). One of them even tries to rip-off Nightmare on Elm Street by having a ghost vampire with Freddy claws. Honestly, I don't think I've laughed more at a trio of awful films so badly in my life. The fact that they don't seem to be very self-aware (since alot of scenes are played for melodrama, but not for one moment can you take them seriously) just makes them even more hysterical.
Come to think of it, it pretty much could have been the Death Wish remake. If only they had the rights to call it that, Cage & co. could have beat Bruce Willis and Eli Roth out of a remake! Definitely watch a lot of Cage films at once if possible, too. I had a marathon of his films one night with my dad and did not regret it (and he's always unironically been a fan, so it was even better for him).
And wow, I guess Ho had even more half-finished movies that he had no idea what to do with and figured he'd just stick them all together and call it a day. I dunno if I've heard of a series so consistently awful from start to finish, usually it's a decent first movie and then the rest are all sh*tty made-for-TV or straight-to-DVD trash.
Also, I know this film was already mentioned on the first page, but I just wanted to remind everyone of the brilliance that is Hercules in New York. Especially the one with Arnold's real voice without any dubbing. This line in particular always cracked me up, I remember actually questioning if he was even speaking English when I first saw this. Arnold was definitely not the best English speaker when this film was made, and even though now I know firsthand how tough learning a second language can be and I can respect him for mastering what was a completely new language to him, I still find lines like that, and everyone's acting, to be hilarious. The whole movie has the look and feel of a cheap early 70s porno (something Sly Stallone actually has experience with).