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Have you ever had to start over in a way

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CricKetVarble
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#1

Posted 14 August 2014 - 02:09 AM

Back in November I went through depression. I made stupid decisions and broke up with the love of my life and abandoned my best friends so I could have sex, drugs, and alcohol. I've been on medication for it since and on Monday I had a bad concussion. Since then I've realized I still love my girlfriend and I miss my real friends. I know its too late so I just texted them, told them Im sorry and I love them and Im starting over. Which I am. Im going to a new school in a new city. Starting fresh. I literally have no friends now. Im completely starting fresh and hoping for a better round 2. Has anyone else ever experienced something like this?

theadmiral
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#2

Posted 14 August 2014 - 02:13 AM

 I literally have no friends now.

Rest assured we are all friends here on GTA Forums.

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CricKetVarble
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#3

Posted 14 August 2014 - 02:15 AM


 I literally have no friends now.

Rest assured we are all friends here on GTA Forums.

"In Vorkuta, we are all brothers." -Viktor Reznov, Call of Duty: Black Ops
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Jeone
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#4

Posted 14 August 2014 - 02:19 AM

I kind of moved to America from Russia in the 90s if that counts

mareepx
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#5

Posted 14 August 2014 - 02:46 AM

I had to start over once.

'Twas sh*t, and still is to an extent; but I think it's made me a better person.


LOES
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#6

Posted 14 August 2014 - 03:09 AM

While I can't say I've been in your position, starting over and turning over a new leaf is a good thing.

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#7

Posted 14 August 2014 - 03:31 AM

I started over in May of 2012. I was a mess before then but I basically "cleaned" myself up and changed for the better. I won't go too much into detail but something happened to me that took such a major blow to my overall well being that I still ponder on about it every day. I became a little more open, a lot more organized, a lot less "weird" and made new acquaintances.


Finn 7 five 11
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#8

Posted 14 August 2014 - 04:29 AM

If they're your friends head back, tell them What happened, that you messed up and you're back, stay off the defensive and just apologise, if you're a dude I'm sure they won't mind.

Harley
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#9

Posted 14 August 2014 - 06:58 AM

Welcome aboard the ship of LOST SOULS.

Also known as the Honeybunch.
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Coin.
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#10

Posted 14 August 2014 - 10:23 AM

Twice now. Sometimes it's just unavoidable, but that's life for you.


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#11

Posted 14 August 2014 - 10:25 AM

I'm stuck in a loading screen, if that makes more sense.
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kevin de santa
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#12

Posted 14 August 2014 - 10:30 AM

I remember back when I was a kid my anxiety was super bad I was changing school every year my parents saw me as a burden. Yea a lot of the times I will cut my ties with people who have been my friends for a while life sucks

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#13

Posted 14 August 2014 - 10:44 AM

I had to testify against some mobsters and the government changed my name and moved me to Maine.

GunWrath
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#14

Posted 14 August 2014 - 10:46 AM

^Added to Snitch database.

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Mr. Scratch
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#15

Posted 14 August 2014 - 11:18 AM

I found a suitcase full of money when I was living in Texas, turns out it belonged to some Mexican drug dealers. So they send this Charles Bronson looking motherf*cker  with a pneumatic piston after me and I made a run for it to Mexico of all places. Now I'm livin' here.

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Fuzzknuckles
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#16

Posted 14 August 2014 - 11:20 AM

Several times. 

 

And every time, it really has just made me stronger. 


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#17

Posted 14 August 2014 - 11:31 AM

Several times. 

 

And every time, it really has just made me stronger. 

Good old new game+

 

I went to a high school where none of the people from my primary school went, so I kinda started over then.

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RandallFlagg00
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#18

Posted 14 August 2014 - 01:10 PM

I started over as far as a big lifestyle change a year and a half ago. I was a big drinker, heavy smoker. I got some bad medical news about my brain and had to immediately quit all alcohol and cigarettes. I don't need to tell you that getting that sh*t out of the system and once you start exercising you feel the best you've ever felt. I wound up losing basically all of my friends. They didn't do anything to me, or me to them. But all of my friends were drinking buddies. It's no fun being around a bunch of drunk people when you're completely sober. So we just kind of stopped calling each other.

I'd say right now I have 1 real friend. Unfortunately I only see him about 3x per year bc he's an active duty marine. Luckily I have a large family. And my wife has a large family. We spend lots of time with each others families so by no means am I lonely. But it does suck sometimes on Fridays after a long week of work remember how you used to get sh*tfaced with your friends every Friday.

Big picture, sobriety is 100x better. Cricket, you'll find friends at your new school I'm sure. If your relationship is over, let it be over. Since your in school you will have no problems meeting girls. I mean, if you're old girl wants to get back together go for it, but if not, don't waste energy trying to get her back. If its meant to be its meant to be blah blah blah.

Good luck with your new life. You are the only one who is in control of it. Make your future what you want it to be. And go Bulls! D Rose is back!!! God willing he'll stay healthy this year. Noah and Gasol. 3 all stars. Gibson and Butler are gonna be beasts this year. Start of a new dynasty.
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#19

Posted 14 August 2014 - 03:51 PM

Did it when i moved from D.C. to STL and i think i did good. Still not much friends since i'm extremely insociable.

GunWrath
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#20

Posted 14 August 2014 - 04:08 PM

I started over as far as a big lifestyle change a year and a half ago. I was a big drinker, heavy smoker. I got some bad medical news about my brain and had to immediately quit all alcohol and cigarettes. I don't need to tell you that getting that sh*t out of the system and once you start exercising you feel the best you've ever felt. I wound up losing basically all of my friends. They didn't do anything to me, or me to them. But all of my friends were drinking buddies. It's no fun being around a bunch of drunk people when you're completely sober. So we just kind of stopped calling each other.

I'd say right now I have 1 real friend. Unfortunately I only see him about 3x per year bc he's an active duty marine. Luckily I have a large family. And my wife has a large family. We spend lots of time with each others families so by no means am I lonely. But it does suck sometimes on Fridays after a long week of work remember how you used to get sh*tfaced with your friends every Friday.

Big picture, sobriety is 100x better. Cricket, you'll find friends at your new school I'm sure. If your relationship is over, let it be over. Since your in school you will have no problems meeting girls. I mean, if you're old girl wants to get back together go for it, but if not, don't waste energy trying to get her back. If its meant to be its meant to be blah blah blah.

Good luck with your new life. You are the only one who is in control of it. Make your future what you want it to be. And go Bulls! D Rose is back!!! God willing he'll stay healthy this year. Noah and Gasol. 3 all stars. Gibson and Butler are gonna be beasts this year. Start of a new dynasty.

I've tried sobriety, personally, I just wasn't ready for it. But I'm glad you found sobriety man.. I was part of a program legally obligated to attend AA and other places for substance abuse and honestly, I've met some cool, down to earth people in those rooms man. Some of them were gungho about AA and all, I remember being the 'this f*cking guy is nuts' guy at first, then eventually come to actually like sitting there and listening to people, because I found out I wasn't the only asshole or only person to think a certain way. Many of us share the same stories.. was cool. It helped me stick to being sober for the length of my obligated time but afterwards I went back to drinking.. but I was able to drink and not act like my old self, I was able to just relax.. but I can still get out of line at times but sh*t happens.

 

Anyways, carried on there.. but yeah, if you quit drinking, you'll definitely find out who is actually your friends. Other than my family and childhood friends and club brothers, my other 'friends' ceased to be when I quit going to bars or wanting to go out for a drink. Oh well, their loss. But cool story you shared there man, hope the brain thing is temporary and things continue going good for ya. :^:

 

I never really needed to make a new start, I got in some deep sh*t when I was like 21, was arrested, ended up getting arrested a few more times for drinking and some other sh*t but it followed me for a long time. Probation, Programs, Community Service, Counselling, the whole shabang, not to mention the costs, court dates, letting family down, neglecting other responsibilities. It got heavy until around April when I finally graduated that Court program, finished my probation requirements and paid off all my fines and other debts. I just had to change my social life basically, I haven't been to a bar since.. when I drink, I'm either home or just stay the night at the clubhouse then come home in the morning.

 

But yeah, props to y'all that have taken the step towards a new start and have been committed to it. Stick with it man.. things might get bad at times but they will get better. :^:

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Nowdrivefaster
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#21

Posted 14 August 2014 - 04:59 PM

I started over a few years ago, when I got busted using drugs. My fiancé told me that I need some help, and I had tried everything to keep that secret... It didn't work out. I had lost my daughter who moved into his father, I had dropped out of high school and all I did was drinking, using drugs and fighting everywhere.

 

That moment, when I got busted, changed everything. I started over with a sober and honorable life. I continued high school, fixed everything that could be fixed, got closer to my family and so on. I got my daughter back to our house, graduated my high school, studied writing and drama for one year, completed another secondary school and now I'm studying psychology in an open university and working in part-time job as a journalist. My family is still close to me, I have a lot of friends and although I have took a couple of drinks during this six years, I can now stop it whenever I want to.

 

I still don't understand how on earth could my fiancé stand for everything of these things. I didn't think I deserved anything good. I have been bullied and cheated on in every possible ways for my whole life and suddenly I have a group of people who just accepts me as I am... my family has, otherwise, always done that. I have been with my fiancé for seven years now and I owe him my life: without him I would probably be dead or totally insane. He says it is not necessary to thank him; I changed things myself, but I just needed that rough wake-up call.

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#22

Posted 14 August 2014 - 08:12 PM

I am currently trying to be more social but not with hipsters. I am changing my life slowly.

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#23

Posted 14 August 2014 - 09:14 PM

Well I moved to the United States 13 years ago, if that counts.. probably shouldn't since I was like 7 years old or something.

 

I'm planning on moving to California in a few weeks, permanently to start something with a girl I've been talking to for 3 years but didn't develop into a "relationship" until last Fall.

Pretty nervous about that, but if things go according to plan then everything will work out over there.


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#24

Posted 14 August 2014 - 11:37 PM

I don't drink do drugs or smoke I think that's the one part of my life thats not broken

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#25

Posted 15 August 2014 - 09:43 AM

I started over. Several times. Most recently last year - someone close to me died and there's nothing quite like death to remind you that you're alive, if that makes any sense. You're moving in huge steps forward if you're trying to mend broken bridges. You might not get the perfect outcome, but you tried, and that's all that matters. 

 

Also, running from psychos sucks ass. If I have to run again, I have to move countries. Do not want :/

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#26

Posted 15 August 2014 - 07:26 PM

I started over at the end of May. I moved out of my parents house and I had to experience the fading away of a couple of people that were very significant to me in my life at the time. I wouldn't call it the most swell starting over experience ever since new problems arose but my mental health has definitely been improving some along with my social life. :ph34r: :ph34r: 

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johnny_zoo
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#27

Posted 15 August 2014 - 10:41 PM

I feel as though its on the horizon. Like mine hasn't fully hit. Let me explain.

 

Basically I've failed at life. At least thats what Im made to feel. My brothers tease me about not accomplishing anything with my life on the scale of them. I'm not popular have virtually no friends, no ambition, nothing. Very little talent and ability compared to them. Now I won't let that trouble me as I define what success and failure is relative to me and not according to their measuring stick. I know material things are not true and lasting success but thats another story. Despite this I'd be lying if I said my feelings of inferiority wasn't affecting me a little. Right now I am wondering whats going to become of my life, if I will be happy or do something significant. I feel as though I need to start over and that day is slowly coming. A day where I break down and cry bitterly over my bad decisions my inadequacy and my foolishness.

 

What is worse about my state is I'm the second oldest of 7 siblings so I should be 'better' than them but all have risen and surpassed me in everything. They get more respect, make more friends easier and garner help and affection with no effort. I feel like a pariah and a failure. They are moving out to uni soon however my uni experience at uni was nothing but shameful and awful. I'm 25 and still at home. I am trying to hold onto the last bit of self respect I have. (Thats how I got to this point though my inherent dislike for myself.) I'm wondering whether to just let it go and start again. Im sure no one else on this forum is in the position I am.

 

I haven't started over yet but I want to. Desperately I need to. I will some day I hope.


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#28

Posted 15 August 2014 - 11:15 PM

Johnny_zoo
You need to stop comparing yourself to other people. Life isn't a competition. It sounds like you are your harshest critic. I really doubt that the outside world is judging you as you see yourself. I'm sure that you have great qualities but your just not seeing them right now. If you want to change your life, you can. Don't try to drastically change everything at once, that can give you a meltdown. I recommend you do something for other people to start. Not for your family. But for some strangers. Some kind of charitable work, soup kitchen, volunteer for Big Brother, any kind of youth group. You clearly have lots of experience working with kids. Those people you help would only see you as the person who gave a f*ck about them, who helped them, none of the negative qualities that you see in yourself. Just something to think about. Remember small changes can change your life in huge ways. Hang in there man
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IveGotNoValues
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#29

Posted 16 August 2014 - 04:34 AM Edited by IveGotNoValues, 16 August 2014 - 04:37 AM.

Well yes I guess I have, but it was my own choice and it was a decision I made out of depression and confusion back at the end of freshman year. I originally went to a high school where all my friends from junior high and elementary went, and stayed there for the entirety of freshman year. Ever since 7th grade I'd been pretty severely depressed, antisocial, and just a total misfit, I just felt so out of place everywhere, even with my close friends. Well at the end of 9th grade I decided I'd switch to another high school across town so I could just be alone, that's all I wanted, to get away from all the bad memories associated with people at this school and just be a loner. I'm not kidding, I was so depressed that I convinced myself to push all my friends away so I could be an outcast, I wanted to isolate myself socially. Honestly it's kind of all a blur, but I don't know what was up with me, even when I hung out with my friends I would fantasize about just being left alone to sit by myself, I took my friends for granted. I felt like a burden to them, they deserved better than me...and so I pushed them away and switched schools. It was completely my fault though, I was an asshole and my mentally unstable self abandoned them with really no reason.

 

Well I went to this new school not knowing anyone at all. At lunch on the first day of Sophomore year I found a nice, empty, quiet spot to sit and just listen to music...This was exactly what I wanted at my old school. I was finally the loner I longed to be. But I quickly realized I made a mistake and deep down i really didn't wanna be alone...I f*cked up and could only blame myself. Well I convinced myself I wouldn't be capable of making new friends and no one would even wanna associate with me, but then on the third day of school, I saw three fellow loners like myself, and something inside me changed. Suddenly an impulse told me to go up to the bench and sit with one of them (I'm surprised I even did this, considering I had severe social anxiety back then). Then the 2 other loners came to the bench too and we all kinda became a group. We all switched there from other schools looking to start over, and by some coincidence we all found each other. These were my main friends throughout Sophomore year (well except one of them that tried to fight me 2 weeks into school, f*ck him).

 

Well there's alot more to the story (I could probably write a whole book about it if I wanted), but moral of the story is, depression can really f*ck you up and make you become apathetic, cause irrational decisions to be made, and cause you to push good friends away. I sometimes feel bad for leaving the old friends I had, but honestly at the same time I regret nothing cause I made some great new friends and memories at my new school that I wouldn't trade for anything.

 

Just this past week I got back in touch with some friends from my old school, now that I'm much more stable and I've matured a bit, I'm gonna use this second chance at friendship I've been given. I'm glad they don't hate me for leaving them with no warning 2 years ago.


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#30

Posted 16 August 2014 - 06:48 AM

I found a suitcase full of money when I was living in Texas, turns out it belonged to some Mexican drug dealers. So they send this Charles Bronson motherf*cker  with a pneumatic piston after me and I made a run for it to Mexico of all places. Now I'm livin' here.


Call bulls**




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