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Online friendship/relationships?

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a20characterusername
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#61

Posted 08 August 2014 - 01:29 AM

@pouritup: Maybe she blocked you cause she's burnt out on talking? No matter how well you get along with someone, you're eventually going to get tired of them and/or run out of things to say, even if only temporarily. I got like that with my roommate. Could be any reason, no use dwelling on it if you're not going to just ask her what the deal is.


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#62

Posted 09 August 2014 - 11:46 AM

No.

 

I think nothing could replace real-life socializing and friends.

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Eutyphro
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#63

Posted 10 August 2014 - 11:16 PM Edited by gtaxpert, 12 August 2014 - 02:33 AM.

An online relationship wasn't a choice for me. It just happened. You meet someone you like online, you talk to them often, and suddenly realize you have developed feelings for them. You didn't choose those feelings but they just happen. Off course socializing on the internet in general is an optional activity. Socializing on the internet has been very relevant to me though. I had a year where I had not much to do, and I spent some time talking to random people and experimenting with what kind of conversation works and how to present myself. I started out sometimes ending up talking about my insecurities, but eventually gained confidence. It changed me as a person.

Off course you might just as well do the same thing in real life, and that would involve body language and eye contact, which are essential things to 'practice' too. So in stead of talking to people on the internet, I could've spent the time on jobs and meeting people and worked on practicing in real life. That's a different approach, one that is ultimately the most important one.

Making social mistakes in real life tend to be hard on self confidence though. That makes it an attractive option to be social anonymously (which seems a contradiction). When you haven't succeeded socially in real life you create an image with the people you know that you don't like, but that you get stuck in. This is why it is interesting to practice online over and over again with people that have no conception of you whatsoever.The ultimate goal is real life though, and not online, obviously.

 

I eventually met one girl that became my best friend. We've had difficult times when she got involved with other people, but because of our friendship we always remained close. I've met her over 2 years ago on omegle, and we still haven't met in real life. She said she was coming over in September, but now it turns out she doesn't have the money for it, even if I help pay. So yeah, there's a significant downside to online relationships and it is important to remain realistic about it. When somebody cuts you off it is insanely hurtful, and it is important to always be prepared for that. To not get carried away by promises he/she makes you. Somebody you talk to online each day cutting you off might be far more hurtful than a real life break up. The idea that you'll never get to meet the person you love in real life is the most heart breaking thing. But you'll get over it and you'll get out stronger.

I think it is ignorant to say that online relationships are a bad thing in general. Everybody can find their own way of being social and having relationships. There is no wrong or right way, but you have to find out what works for you.

I think it is also important to talk to each other over videocall on Skype some time. When you both see and hear each other at the same time you can get a good image of your social chemistry. Much better than just talking over chat, though that might be a good place to start.

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pouritup90
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#64

Posted 13 August 2014 - 09:17 PM

I have to bump this beause i am  finding it hard to get over :( Is there anyone else who can share experiences or try cheer me up a little bit?


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#65

Posted 13 August 2014 - 09:47 PM

Go find something to do. If you are gonna be having a lot of spare time looking at your screen hoping for her to come back talking, you'll be a mess. Go find a job or a hobby. If you have something to do you'll move on easier. Don't look at pictures of her. Delete the pictures you have of her. Don't try contacting her. If she contacts you, seriously consider stopping talking to her.


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#66

Posted 13 August 2014 - 11:08 PM

Okay now I am feeling like i am in some sort of bad dream or something. The girl without warning has blocked me on Skype and removed me from Snapchat and Kik!! We were talking fine yesterday and everything seemed normal?? I am absolutely gutted and feel like this is not real life? The last thing she said to me was "haha me too" which was when i said "i'm going to sleep now" and i have woken up today and she is gone! 3 months of conversation is still on Skype and I dont know what happened and i will probably never find out why she did it or hear from her ever again.
 
And as well as that problem, my friends from the baseball forum have been giving me one word responses and do not seem interested in chatting any more. Maybe i have came across as too desperate or some thing like that? How horrible to be feeling like this.


LMAO

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#67

Posted 14 August 2014 - 10:49 AM

RIP In Peace, OP... :O

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#68

Posted 14 August 2014 - 11:04 AM Edited by Fuzzknuckles, 14 August 2014 - 11:04 AM.

Can't be arsed to read through this whole thread, so I'll just leave this here:

I left my wife for a woman I met online. We have been together 9 years. They have been the best 9 years of my life.

 

The connection you build with someone you can't see or speak to in person, but rather build via IM'ing and vid-chat, etc, can be so much stronger than a connection with someone you meet and go on dates with. 

 

If you really feel something for her, and you think she feels something back, meet her. See how it goes. You have a head start. What's the worst that could happen? It doesn't work out... you both move on. Don't waste the opportunity. Seize the day. 

 

---

 

Haha, well, I just saw a few posts above mine. f*ck it. Bad luck bro. 

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Edwin
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#69

Posted 14 August 2014 - 11:18 AM

Can't be arsed to read through this whole thread, so I'll just leave this here:
I left my wife for a woman I met online. We have been together 9 years. They have been the best 9 years of my life.
 
The connection you build with someone you can't see or speak to in person, but rather build via IM'ing and vid-chat, etc, can be so much stronger than a connection with someone you meet and go on dates with. 
 
If you really feel something for her, and you think she feels something back, meet her. See how it goes. You have a head start. What's the worst that could happen? It doesn't work out... you both move on. Don't waste the opportunity. Seize the day. 

:^: :^: :^:

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#70

Posted 15 August 2014 - 09:53 AM

Being someone who has severe social anxiety as well as a four page list of other things supposedly wrong with my brain, meeting people online has completely changed my life. It allows me to be whoever I want to be, and that's a huge deal when your mind tries to f*ck everything up for you. 

 

Online relationships rarely ever work. But when they do, it's amazing. I think they can be just as real and wonderful as any real life relationship. 

 

As for your current situation, OP, that really sucks and I'm sorry. I don't even have any advice, tbh. Just felt like butting my 2c in.


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#71

Posted 15 August 2014 - 10:50 AM

Not to sound negative but these relationships don't really work. You guys are in a "honeymoon phase" and there's excitement, attraction and whatnot between you. However an online relationship doesn't reveal potential sustainability for viable relationship. You are not in each others lives, really. It's merely a virtual relationship in which hitting "block" removes this person from your life. 

 

Also, you wont go through the trials and tribulations of a real life relationship, how you act around each other, how you act around friends, family etc. 

 

Enjoy it for what it is.. just a bit of virtual fun. But I think that's all it will really be. Especially when you or her will meet someone in their real life. Someone they can touch, hug, see, smell, randomly bump in to at the shopping mall, bar, club. Someone they can share with their friends. 

 

The romantic side of me wants to say "got for it" but the realistic side of me say'd.. just have fun but realise it's probably only that even if those feelings seem real. 


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#72

Posted 15 August 2014 - 11:29 AM

Online friendship, sure. relationship? hell no, why would i wanna be with someone i cant touch and our only interaction is through a digital screen? f*ck that.


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#73

Posted 15 August 2014 - 03:05 PM

Online relationships are pretty pointless if you don't meet up every now and then. When I was younger I used to get into a lot of online relationships but none of the love was actually real, I was just in it for the pics. I'm glad I grew out of it though.


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#74

Posted 15 August 2014 - 04:04 PM

False, there are no women on the internet. 

 

 

HAHAHA!! ^^ :lol:

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LOES
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#75

Posted 15 August 2014 - 04:09 PM

It's kinda weird if you know someone through the internet, then if you meet up IRL, they aren't the person you thought them to be. Awkwardness ensues....

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johnny_zoo
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#76

Posted 15 August 2014 - 06:14 PM

Can't be arsed to read through this whole thread, so I'll just leave this here:

I left my wife for a woman I met online. We have been together 9 years. They have been the best 9 years of my life.

Im guessing this wasn't Omegle.

 

 

I don't even know how to go about getting into online relationships sooooo......I've no idea how they can even come about.

This. How on earth does online relationships happen? 


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#77

Posted 19 August 2014 - 07:46 AM

 

Can't be arsed to read through this whole thread, so I'll just leave this here:

I left my wife for a woman I met online. We have been together 9 years. They have been the best 9 years of my life.

Im guessing this wasn't Omegle.

 

 

I don't even know how to go about getting into online relationships sooooo......I've no idea how they can even come about.

This. How on earth does online relationships happen? 

 

You're right, it wasn't. In my case, it was a forum, much like this one, but not this one. We got talking about stuff, ended up talking via IM, then eventually met up. We were strictly friends until, one day, my wife accused me of being in love with my now-girlfriend. And I realised she was right, I was in love with her, and no longer loved my wife. So we split, and the next day, my girlfriend moved in with me. In 9 years we have had precisely 3 arguments, which lasted no more than 10 minutes each. 

 

These things can appear out of nowhere and change everything. 


Eutyphro
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#78

Posted 19 August 2014 - 08:31 AM Edited by gtaxpert, 19 August 2014 - 08:33 AM.

People meet their girlfriends/wives at random places in real life too right? Then why couldn't you meet one on a website with random people like omegle? Problem with omegle is that you have to wade through sh*t to find anyone decent. Seas full of sh*t. Also seas full of 'trolls' (idiots), catfishes, 13 year old dudes etc.. I guess it is completely not worth it, but back then I had barely anything to do. I found a girl there and I still talk to her over two years later. She is my best friend. I should really meet her some day soon.

I never went there with the goal of finding a girl that I would keep long term contact with, but that just happened.


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#79

Posted 29 September 2014 - 02:06 PM

so things turned out great with the girl and she is flying over in two days to meet me!!!

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#80

Posted 29 September 2014 - 02:24 PM

Sweeettt .. so, we're gonna get to see pictures of you two together .. right?

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#81

Posted 29 September 2014 - 04:17 PM

 finding a girl that I would keep long term contact with

Exactly what I am looking for..but throw in the word 'mutual'. in front of 'long term'.

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#82

Posted 29 September 2014 - 05:20 PM

so things turned out great with the girl and she is flying over in two days to meet me!!!


Nice, good luck man :^:

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#83

Posted 29 September 2014 - 06:14 PM Edited by RyderNotThisAgain, 29 September 2014 - 08:45 PM.

I always thought that long distance relationships didn't work  patrice.png

Are you thinking of moving to her country or vice versa?


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#84

Posted 29 September 2014 - 08:34 PM

Different states I could see happening, but different country I think is pushing it a little too far. Get a better job and do the math for how possible it'll be.

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#85

Posted 29 September 2014 - 09:14 PM

i've been friends with a girl i met online for 6 years, she became my best friend and i care about her more than anyone else

recently things have been going bad, give or take a month or two

to sum it up, i couldnt learn when to stop, and that ended up pissing her off so much to the point that she blocked me everywhere i could contact her, that happened last monday

admittedly i was heartbroken because i know it would be the end of that unless i did something, and, i am doing something, im going to see her for a few days irl to fix things, hopefully this month

 

..she lives in argentina, i think im crazy for wanting to do this, but her friendship is worth everything to me

point being, if you really care about a friend you met online, dont let a block button destroy everything

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#86

Posted 29 September 2014 - 09:30 PM

I personally think online relationships are as real as any common relationship. Which is also to say they can be as good or as bad as any relationship.

 

I've been lucky enough to meet someone I'm really in love with in the web, and we've met a few times throughout the whole relationship. The feeling of meeting them, whether it be the first time or the ones after that, is honestly out of this world

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#87

Posted 29 September 2014 - 10:43 PM

 

to sum it up, i couldnt learn when to stop, 

what does this mean?


Killzone3265
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#88

Posted 29 September 2014 - 11:15 PM

 

 

to sum it up, i couldnt learn when to stop, 

what does this mean?

 

i wouldn't let her make her own decisions, even when they were horrible ones

it makes me sound weird but theres a long story behind it of which i dont feel like explaining


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#89

Posted 30 September 2014 - 03:08 AM Edited by Danz., 30 September 2014 - 03:08 AM.

i've been friends with a girl i met online for 6 years, she became my best friend and i care about her more than anyone else

recently things have been going bad, give or take a month or two

to sum it up, i couldnt learn when to stop, and that ended up pissing her off so much to the point that she blocked me everywhere i could contact her, that happened last monday

admittedly i was heartbroken because i know it would be the end of that unless i did something, and, i am doing something, im going to see her for a few days irl to fix things, hopefully this month

 

..she lives in argentina, i think im crazy for wanting to do this, but her friendship is worth everything to me

point being, if you really care about a friend you met online, dont let a block button destroy everything

Give me her number, she lives pretty close to me, so I can try to fix things up.

 

What about it, huh?

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The Harwood Bitcher
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#90

Posted 30 September 2014 - 03:15 AM Edited by The Harwood Bitcher, 30 September 2014 - 03:31 AM.

There is no such thing as online relationship or friendship ,it has to be face to face.

i've been friends with a girl i met online for 6years...she lives in argentina, i think im crazy for wanting to do this..

Pay me and i can bring her to you
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