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Worst/funniest lyrics you've heard?

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Scaglietti
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#1

Posted 06 July 2014 - 05:33 PM Edited by Sting4S, 06 July 2014 - 05:33 PM.

I looked around and there appears to be no topic dedicated to talking about ridiculous lyrics. What are some of the worst or funniest lyrics you've heard? Quote them.

 

Ima Real 1 - f*ck a bitch and bust a nut in 4 minutes, 'cause I ain't got time for pussy

 

Stupid Hoe - Them nappy headed hoes but my kitchen good I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish a bitch wooooooooooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuld

 


The Hippie
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#2

Posted 06 July 2014 - 05:41 PM Edited by The Hippie, 06 July 2014 - 05:42 PM.

George Thorogood - " I drink alone, yeah with nobody else, you know when I drink alone I prefer to be by myself"


Testarossa
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#3

Posted 07 July 2014 - 05:32 AM

Family Reunion by Blink 182:

sh*t, piss, f*ck, c*nt, cocksucker, motherf*cker, tits, fart, turd and twat
I f*cked your mom!


Nonpareil1983
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#4

Posted 07 July 2014 - 08:18 AM

Anything by Lil Wayne. 

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Flūttershy
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#5

Posted 07 July 2014 - 09:42 PM Edited by rawrsnar, 07 July 2014 - 09:42 PM.

This song has pretty awesome lyrics. Brought to you by Nickelback:

 

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universetwisters
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#6

Posted 07 July 2014 - 10:25 PM

"The wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" Even though the song itself is pretty serious, the lyrics are a bit silly, like:

 

 

When suppertime came, the old cook came on deck sayin'.

Fellas, it's too rough to feed ya.
At seven p.m. a main hatchway caved in, he said
Fellas, it's been good t'know ya

Scaglietti
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#7

Posted 09 July 2014 - 06:45 PM Edited by Sting4S, 09 July 2014 - 06:48 PM.

"Freak Hoes" - Tru Master P & Mia X

All you niggas talkin bout bounce dat ass this ain't no free show we want da mutha f*ckin cash ho. f*ck ya weed don't want no drank- don't even think that you can f*ck me you ain't even got enough to touch me. I seen you stuntin in Benz but them broads know its your mutha f*ckin friends- wanna be balla nigga you's a ho dope callin us freaks but your the freaky one- tongue lickin on my puss like a stick to a snare drum until I cum. All in ya f*ckin face- floss ya teeth with my pussy hairs

:sui:


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#8

Posted 10 July 2014 - 02:39 AM

Eazy-E - Real Muthaf*ckin' G's is hilarious, where Eazy-E talks sh*t about Snoop and Dre throughout the course of the song:

 

 

You and your Doggy Dogg, think that y'all hoggin' sh*t
Both of you bitches, can come and suck my doggy dick

 

And the multiple references he makes to Dre being a crossdresser:

All of a sudden Dr. Dre is the G thang, But on his old album cover he was a she thang.

Flūttershy
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#9

Posted 13 July 2014 - 11:56 PM





Hey there Delilah
What's it like in Redneck City
I'm a couple miles away
And I want to squeeze your titties and it's true
My shaft belongs inside of you
Taste my juice

Hey there Delilah
Well I know you're just my cousin
But you're sexy when you undress
And I can't control my faucet
yes it's true
I hide in closets to watch your boobs
And I f*ck your shoes

Oh, it's what you do to me
Oh, it's what I'll do to you
Oh, you're my sex fantasy
Oh, see what I'll do to you

Hey there Delilah
Heard you're seeing other people
So I threw you in the blender
And I cut your guts and put you in my soup
I fed you to my donkey too
I love you

Oh, it's what you do to me
Oh, it's what I'll do to you
Oh, you're my sex fantasy
Oh, now you're in me with booze
It's what I do to you
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waymuu
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#10

Posted 14 July 2014 - 02:33 AM

"Rats spelled backwards is star, I feel trapped like a fly in a jar"


KFranchise
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#11

Posted 16 July 2014 - 06:25 PM Edited by KFranchise, 16 July 2014 - 06:26 PM.

Weezy F baby, and the F is for Phenomenal. Yep, that's actually a lyric.
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scrublord
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#12

Posted 17 July 2014 - 04:50 PM

"Versace, Versace, Versace, Versace

Versace, Versace, Versace, Versace

Versace, Versace Versace, Versace Versace

Versace, Versace Versace, Versace Versace"

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Lazor Guns
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#13

Posted 17 July 2014 - 06:51 PM

YG - I'm A Real 1:

 

All the bitches love me, all the bitches love me
If I had a hundred dicks I'd have all the bitches f*ck me

Scaglietti
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#14

Posted 18 July 2014 - 06:31 PM

Hey there Delilah
What's it like in Redneck City
I'm a couple miles away
And I want to squeeze your titties and it's true
My shaft belongs inside of you
Taste my juice

Hey there Delilah
Well I know you're just my cousin
But you're sexy when you undress
And I can't control my faucet
yes it's true
I hide in closets to watch your boobs
And I f*ck your shoes

Oh, it's what you do to me
Oh, it's what I'll do to you
Oh, you're my sex fantasy
Oh, see what I'll do to you

Hey there Delilah
Heard you're seeing other people
So I threw you in the blender
And I cut your guts and put you in my soup
I fed you to my donkey too
I love you

Oh, it's what you do to me
Oh, it's what I'll do to you
Oh, you're my sex fantasy
Oh, now you're in me with booze
It's what I do to you

Disturbing yet funny.


universetwisters
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#15

Posted 18 July 2014 - 07:25 PM

This song

 

THIS IS NOT A LOVE SONG

THIS IS NOT A LOVE SONG

THIS IS NOT A LOVE SONG

THIS IS NOT A LOVE SONG

THIS IS NOT A LOVE SONG

THIS IS NOT A LOVE SONG

THIS IS NOT A LOVE SONG

THIS IS NOT A LOVE SONG

 

x59


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#16

Posted 18 July 2014 - 08:31 PM

 

I admit these lyrics aren't actually bad compared to songs like stupid hoe, but within reason, these are the worst/funniest lyrics i know.


Boaaats
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#17

Posted 19 July 2014 - 03:18 AM

GWAR GWAR GWAR GWAR

 

"Your womb is a sewer! Your womb is manure!"

 

 

"Oh I am f*ckin' an animal 

I'm f*ckin' an animal 
I'm holding on the horns 
I'm f*ckin' an animal 
I'm involved with porn 
I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Sure is nice and warm in here 
I'm f*ckin' an animal drinking fifty beers 
I'm f*ckin' an animal blowing fifty steers 
I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Oh, I'm a f*cking queer 
I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Didn't have to take her on a date 
Just had to stand here on a crate 
No talking, no torment, no long-term commitment 
Just me and animal, 
Getting my dick bent I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Didn't have to say please I'm f*ckin' an animal 
With Legionnaires disease I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Damn hard on the knees... I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Animal f*cker, on the loose I'm f*ckin' an animal 
I'll go from dog to goose I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Once I f*cked a moose I'm f*ckin' an animal 
But now the animal is in pain! 
It's in pain, it's in pain, it's in pain (terrible pain). 
And now it's starting to rain.... 
But I'm still the same. I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Not proud of what I do... I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Had a great time at the zoo I'm f*ckin' an animal 
Cause you won't let me f*ck you... 
Animal!"


Scaglietti
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#18

Posted 19 July 2014 - 05:42 PM

Lil Wayne - "Turn on the Lights"

 

That dick make her feel retarded, she said I make her feel special


universetwisters
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#19

Posted 19 July 2014 - 07:03 PM

Summer Breeze by Seals & Crofts.

 

 

See the paper layin' on the sidewalk 

A little music from the house next door 
So I walk on up to the door step 
Through the screen and across the floor 

 

I hear music coming from the other house so I break into it.


Flūttershy
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    well you got the perfect disguise and you're looking okay

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#20

Posted 20 July 2014 - 05:10 PM

THIS PLANE IS DEFINITELY CRASHING!

THIS BOAT IS OBVIOUSLY SINKING!

THIS BUILDING'S TOTALLY BURNING DOWN!

And my, and my, and my, and my
And my, and my, and my, and my
And my, and my, and my, and my
And my, and my, and my, and my
AND MY HEART HAS SLOWLY DRIED UP!



WesternMotorcycleCo.
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#21

Posted 21 July 2014 - 10:08 PM Edited by TPenterprise, 21 July 2014 - 10:09 PM.

"Happy Holidays You Bastard"
 

It's Christmas Eve and I've only wrapped two f*ckin' presents
It's Christmas Eve and I've only wrapped two f*ckin' presents
And I hate, hate, hate your guts,
I hate, hate, hate your guts,
And I'll never talk to you again,
unless your dad will suck me off
I'll never talk to you again
unless your mom will touch my cock
I'll never talk to you again
ejaculate into a sock
I'll never talk to you again,
I'll never talk to you again

It's Labor day and my grandpa just ate seven f*ckin' hotdogs
It's Labor day and my grandpa just ate seven f*ckin' hotdogs
and he sh*t sh*t sh*ts his pants.
He's always f*ckin' sh*ttin' his pants

And I'll never talk to you again
unless your dad will suck me off
I'll never talk to you again
unless your mom will touch my cock
I'll never talk to you again
ejaculate into a sock
I'll never talk to you again,
I'll never talk to you again

Scaglietti
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#22

Posted 22 July 2014 - 06:28 AM

Stupid hoes is my enemy
Stupid hoes is so whack
Stupid hoe shoulda befriended me
Then she coulda probably came back

You're a stupid hoe
You're a stupid hoe
You're a stupid hoe

And I ain't hit that note,
But, f*ck you stupid hoe
Yeah, f*ck you stupid hoe
I said f*ck a stupid hoe,
Yeah, f*ck a stupid hoe

 

Skip towards the end to hear the way she says it. It cracks me up every time.


SouthLand
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#23

Posted 22 July 2014 - 08:11 AM

 

Stupid hoes is my enemy
Stupid hoes is so whack
Stupid hoe shoulda befriended me
Then she coulda probably came back

You're a stupid hoe
You're a stupid hoe
You're a stupid hoe

And I ain't hit that note,
But, f*ck you stupid hoe
Yeah, f*ck you stupid hoe
I said f*ck a stupid hoe,
Yeah, f*ck a stupid hoe

 

Skip towards the end to hear the way she says it. It cracks me up every time.

 

 

A hoe complaining about hoes... 

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Scaglietti
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#24

Posted 27 July 2014 - 12:06 AM

Both of these are equally retarded:

 

Rihanna

 

Ohhhh oh ohhh

All I see is signs

All I see is dollar signs

Ohhhh oh ohhhh

Money on my mind

Money, money on my mind

Throw it, throw it up

Watch it fall off from the sky

Throw it up, throw it up

Watch it all fall out

Pour it up, pour it up

That's how we ball out

Throw it up, throw it up

Watch it all fall out

Pour it up, pour it up

That's how we ball out

That's how we ball out

That's how we ball out

That's how we ball out

 

Bart Baker

 

You don’t need to have talent

Just be like Nicki and show off your fake body

And soon you’ll be really rich

Thanks to surgery I’ve sold 5 million CDs

Ho it ho it up

Watch your money pile high

Whore it up, whore it up let your tits fall out

Ho it up, ho it up make your fake ass bounce

Whore it up, whore it up that’s how we stand out


universetwisters
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#25

Posted 27 July 2014 - 12:10 AM

Anything involving Wesley Willis is quite silly.

 

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Hyperglide
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#26

Posted 27 July 2014 - 03:19 AM Edited by Hyperglide, 27 July 2014 - 03:22 AM.

EDIT: Misread the title.


ShaolinMaster
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#27

Posted 27 July 2014 - 11:01 AM

Soulja Boy - Ice In My Cup

 

Also pretty much anything that is trap/drill.


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#28

Posted 29 July 2014 - 10:43 PM

Candidate for both:

 


GoldenBlade
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#29

Posted 03 August 2014 - 07:18 AM Edited by GoldenBlade, 03 August 2014 - 07:18 AM.

Anything by Tyler The Creator, Lil' Wayne, and Nicki Minaj. I simply just hate rap lyrics.
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Scaglietti
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#30

Posted 04 August 2014 - 04:10 AM

"Why you comin home

5 in the mornin somethings goin on

Lemme smell yo dick"

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