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Road Rage

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EphemeralStar
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#1

Posted 07 June 2014 - 01:57 AM

Here's something I think we can all relate to. What do you do when you are faced with a road-rager? Do you have road rage or get triggered? 

This has been a problem in my relationship. I've only seen my boyfriend have road rage 4-5 times, but each time it's bizarre, scary, totally unlike him as he is a very sweet person typically. Here's what happened:

Today, some girl almost hit our car from behind while she was changing lanes, and she honked at us and drove up past us. I believe she didn't really have the right to honk at us because that was her mistake, or it could had just been a reflex, whatever....but what followed next was the scariest. My boyfriend immediately honked back at her agressively non-stop at least 10 times as he caught up beside her and started cursing at her like a f*cking maniac. He called her these nasty names, told her to suck his dick, and was about to tell her to "go back to India" assuming she was Indian (which I don't believe she was) until I started screaming at him to stop. It's one thing to be like, "What where you're going!" but it carried on to far worse things and I tried my best to make him stop, but then he raged at me as I was telling the girl I was so sorry and he didn't mean it.  The rest of the drive he kept raging at me and telling me he can say whatever he wants! I understood that he was angry so there wasn't much I could say, but I was trying to make him understand that he took it way to far.... eventually when he realizes she can call the cops on him for that (sexual harassment for him telling her to suck his dick) did he actually start to calm down and revert back to normal. Then he was just really sorry and scared and it's just so f*cking bizarre!! So here I am, wondering, what should I do in these situations? Is there anything better I can do to stop him?

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DeafMetal
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#2

Posted 07 June 2014 - 02:07 AM

Short and sweet: get rid of the boyfriend. You're not in a relationship with just the sweet person he is most of the time, you're also in a relationship with the irrational, angry person who screams at you for trying to de-escalate an unpleasant and childish situation. The more serious the relationship becomes, the more facets of each others' personalities you will see, including how you guys react to a situation when feeling a certain way, including anger. You do not want to be in a relationship with someone like this.

 

In regards to what I do... I honk, flip them off, and ignore them.

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Eris
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#3

Posted 07 June 2014 - 02:12 AM

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EphemeralStar
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#4

Posted 07 June 2014 - 02:17 AM

Naaah it's not something that makes such a huge negative impact on us. Plus I'm not willing to throw away 4 years just because of these rage fits, I just need tips or personal experience on how to deal with road rage :p

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#5

Posted 07 June 2014 - 02:20 AM

Simple solution: You drive.

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DeafMetal
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#6

Posted 07 June 2014 - 02:25 AM

What he said ^^^

 

Scratch that then. You've most likely seen about as worse as it gets by now, thought it was a newish relationship.

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Sting4S
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#7

Posted 07 June 2014 - 02:33 AM Edited by StingrayX, 07 June 2014 - 02:33 AM.

Your boyfriend took it a bit too far, not gonna' lie. :/

 

My mom is a road rager, but only because San Antonio drivers are a bunch of tailgating, obliviously idiotic cocks. We've always hated when people tailgated us, but ever since somebody finally rear ended us and totaled our car two months ago, my mom gets extremely annoyed when somebody tailgates us. I get a chuckle out of it and I'm not easily scared whenever she tries to "scare" the driver who tailgated us. :lol:

 

Like yesterday some Chevy estate was on our ass yet we were doing 80 mph in a 65 speed limit zone. My mom tapped on the brakes to let the driver know that she needed to back off. That didn't work, so my mom slowed down and the estate passed us like an idiot. So seeing that she was heading for the access road, my mom quickly sped up to her and tailed her, then passed her. The girl gave us the finger and my mom returned it. I don't even get scared, it's just ridiculous. How my mom overreacts and how ridiculously stupid these drivers are.

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Raavi
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#8

Posted 07 June 2014 - 02:37 AM

Defuse the situation, say he's right and if personal experience is anything to go by (good friend of mine cusses like a damn sailer when something like that happens even when he is not behind the wheel) after a few more profanity laced lines he'll be done. If you try to argue with him on the other hand, you'll only be throwing oil on the fire. Non of us act rational when emotions are running high. As for how I react, I honk once as to say "you are an idiot", perhaps give them a look of disapproval and then I just drive off. No point in getting emotional about something I have absolutely no control over. 

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Verdant
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#9

Posted 07 June 2014 - 02:52 AM

I haven't come across any other drivers road raging, nor have I done it myself yet.

Matter of a fact, I'd be so horrified if this sh*t happened to me.

 

This guy just keeps going after him.


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#10

Posted 07 June 2014 - 02:56 AM

Give him a blowjob. That should chill him out.

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johnny_zoo
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#11

Posted 07 June 2014 - 03:08 AM Edited by johnny_zoo, 07 June 2014 - 03:09 AM.

My advice:

Take him to anger management.

The truth:
His anger is a lifelong disease.


You can't talk someone out of being irate. Someone at that level is not thinking straight. Only thing you can do is wait till it passes. Try not speaking it might confuse him and he'll wonder why and then calm.

Also He can't be all that sweet if he he flips a switch and cusses likes you described in 2 seconds. Then he turned on you. Sounds like a great catch.

Good to warn you also that anger is the same fire you'll receive one day if you piss him off or something. You could end up a domestic case cos you forgot green cheese and mushroom in his sandwich. His words not mine. Not saying break up but I'd watch out.

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#12

Posted 07 June 2014 - 03:10 AM

breathing exercises or yoga or something

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#13

Posted 07 June 2014 - 03:29 AM Edited by GtaFiveLs, 07 June 2014 - 03:38 AM.

f*cking everyday.....

Almost punched a guy once, but too bad he didnt get out of his car when i did, he got scared and drove away :(.

Edit: Youre boyfriend should have not get that angry at her, we all know women cant drive XD.
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Mister Kay
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#14

Posted 07 June 2014 - 07:42 AM

I always end up with a look which says, "What the hell are you doing, man?"
When it is my fault, I always apologize with a smile.
I don't know why but I become a better person on road than I truly am.

I do remember raging really bad when an auto-rickshaw driver t-boned my car. It was justified though because all of them drive like assholes and I can't stand their attitude when they f*ck up and still won't leave their angry look.

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#15

Posted 07 June 2014 - 07:51 AM

Odd question, but what does he drive?

I used to get really bad road-range (though generally at people who actually f*cking deserved it) but found that the frequency with which people drive like dicks around me, and the frequency with which I get utterly incandescent with rage at their dickishness, can be directly proportional to what I'm driving at the time.
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#16

Posted 07 June 2014 - 08:24 AM

I flip people off and Swear at them all the time, People in Alberta can't f*cking Drive.

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RoadRunner71
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#17

Posted 07 June 2014 - 10:31 AM

I use the axe in this kind of situtations.

 

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Sting4S
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#18

Posted 07 June 2014 - 01:28 PM

Trucks down here, and there is a lot it is Texas haha, tend to have a lot of road rage and like to cut you off at the last minute. Then if you pass them or try to merge, they'll speed up and waste all of their gas like a bunch of redneck idiots.

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#19

Posted 07 June 2014 - 05:56 PM Edited by D- Ice, 07 June 2014 - 11:11 PM.

Sorry to hear about your trouble, EphemeralStar, but like you quite correctly stated, it's actually quite common.

Such road rage is a form of maladaptive behaviour, and like most those involving anger or rage a conversion of deep-seated anxiety into anger lies at the heart of it. The issues here are either abnormally elevated levels of anxiety, of the disproporationate and inappropriate conversion of normal,mld levels of anxiety into anger. In either case, over-valued or illogical beliefs are the cause.

 

From what you described, I don't really think professional psychological or psychiatric help is needed right now. Maybe you can try to explore and correct the root beliefs that cause this. I myself used to have somewhat similar maladaptive angry behaviours (though not driving-related), and quite easily dropped them all once I realised how useless they really are.

 

All the best.

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TECHN9CiAN
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#20

Posted 07 June 2014 - 06:34 PM Edited by TECHN9CiAN, 07 June 2014 - 06:41 PM.

Trucks down here, and there is a lot it is Texas haha, tend to have a lot of road rage and like to cut you off at the last minute. Then if you pass them or try to merge, they'll speed up and waste all of their gas like a bunch of redneck idiots.

9 times out of 10, they "cut you off at the last minute" because you refuse to let him in when the blinker first goes off. Dont blame truckers for your lack of courtesy, and wonder why they get vindictive.

Edit: im a trucker as u might have figured, and i dont typicaly cut people off unless im obviously wanting to switch lanes and a civilian is at least 2 car spaces behind AND has the nerve to try speeding up to prevent me from getting in front of them (which happens more often then not). In that situation i get mad and cut in faster, i dont care. I got 80,000 pounds of weight, and usually at least 30,000 in the rear trailer axles, if some noncurtious assmunch wants to get caught under my rear wheels and flattened to death, so be it.

Still, its rare when i do this. Truckers are supposed to remain in the right lane at all times, its the law, so if their switching around to pass other drivers or let highway on-rampers who dont know how to merge properly, get in, then thats their fault.

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#21

Posted 07 June 2014 - 07:13 PM

Trucks down here, and there is a lot it is Texas haha, tend to have a lot of road rage and like to cut you off at the last minute. Then if you pass them or try to merge, they'll speed up and waste all of their gas like a bunch of redneck idiots.

9 times out of 10, they "cut you off at the last minute" because you refuse to let him in when the blinker first goes off. Dont blame truckers for your lack of courtesy, and wonder why they get vindictive.

Edit: im a trucker as u might have figured, and i dont typicaly cut people off unless im obviously wanting to switch lanes and a civilian is at least 2 car spaces behind AND has the nerve to try speeding up to prevent me from getting in front of them (which happens more often then not). In that situation i get mad and cut in faster, i dont care. I got 80,000 pounds of weight, and usually at least 30,000 in the rear trailer axles, if some noncurtious assmunch wants to get caught under my rear wheels and flattened to death, so be it.

Still, its rare when i do this. Truckers are supposed to remain in the right lane at all times, its the law, so if their switching around to pass other drivers or let highway on-rampers who dont know how to merge properly, get in, then thats their fault.
lol says civilan like hes some kind of soldier

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#22

Posted 07 June 2014 - 07:24 PM

Lol I'm going to have to use "go back to India" next time i get in a rage.  

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TECHN9CiAN
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#23

Posted 07 June 2014 - 07:43 PM

Trucks down here, and there is a lot it is Texas haha, tend to have a lot of road rage and like to cut you off at the last minute. Then if you pass them or try to merge, they'll speed up and waste all of their gas like a bunch of redneck idiots.

9 times out of 10, they "cut you off at the last minute" because you refuse to let him in when the blinker first goes off. Dont blame truckers for your lack of courtesy, and wonder why they get vindictive.

Edit: im a trucker as u might have figured, and i dont typicaly cut people off unless im obviously wanting to switch lanes and a civilian is at least 2 car spaces behind AND has the nerve to try speeding up to prevent me from getting in front of them (which happens more often then not). In that situation i get mad and cut in faster, i dont care. I got 80,000 pounds of weight, and usually at least 30,000 in the rear trailer axles, if some noncurtious assmunch wants to get caught under my rear wheels and flattened to death, so be it.

Still, its rare when i do this. Truckers are supposed to remain in the right lane at all times, its the law, so if their switching around to pass other drivers or let highway on-rampers who dont know how to merge properly, get in, then thats their fault.
lol says civilan like hes some kind of soldier

Marine, actually.

EphemeralStar
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#24

Posted 07 June 2014 - 08:26 PM

Odd question, but what does he drive?

I used to get really bad road-range (though generally at people who actually f*cking deserved it) but found that the frequency with which people drive like dicks around me, and the frequency with which I get utterly incandescent with rage at their dickishness, can be directly proportional to what I'm driving at the time.

Haha just a chevy cobalt. Now that you mention it, he's only ever raged in that car. There's been times where we were in his other car, the crappy old toyota camry and he doesn't act too extreme in that one. 

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Sting4S
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#25

Posted 07 June 2014 - 08:58 PM Edited by StingrayX, 07 June 2014 - 08:59 PM.

 

Trucks down here, and there is a lot it is Texas haha, tend to have a lot of road rage and like to cut you off at the last minute. Then if you pass them or try to merge, they'll speed up and waste all of their gas like a bunch of redneck idiots.

9 times out of 10, they "cut you off at the last minute" because you refuse to let him in when the blinker first goes off. Dont blame truckers for your lack of courtesy, and wonder why they get vindictive.

What are you talking about? Honestly, I think It'd be best for you to just keep your ignorant mouth shut if all you're going to do is base your arguments off of assumptions. Get out of here...

 

I'm sure staying in my lane and seeing a truck riding behind me that decides to speed up and then cut me off without a blinker is my fault right. Right? Right? What f*cking world are you living in?

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#26

Posted 07 June 2014 - 09:08 PM


 

Trucks down here, and there is a lot it is Texas haha, tend to have a lot of road rage and like to cut you off at the last minute. Then if you pass them or try to merge, they'll speed up and waste all of their gas like a bunch of redneck idiots.

9 times out of 10, they "cut you off at the last minute" because you refuse to let him in when the blinker first goes off. Dont blame truckers for your lack of courtesy, and wonder why they get vindictive.
What are you talking about? Honestly, I think It'd be best for you to just keep your ignorant mouth shut if all you're going to do is base your arguments off of assumptions. Get out of here...
 
I'm sure staying in my lane and seeing a truck riding behind me that decides to speed up and then cut me off without a blinker is my fault right. Right? Right? What f*cking world are you living in?
wooah there hes a trucker / marine. Dude hes obviously an jarhead who has earned his rights to drive how he wants :p
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#27

Posted 07 June 2014 - 09:20 PM Edited by JIMHO, 07 June 2014 - 09:35 PM.

EphemeralStar, maybe you should get him a new junker to put around in and sell the Cobalt.

 

My suggestion:

modeltrucks_04_1000.jpg

I should add that I can confirm driving any Toyota clown cars will reduce your road rage. I got in a car accident a couple of weeks ago in my clown car where the other driver was found to be at fault and I wasn't even mad.


TECHN9CiAN
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#28

Posted 07 June 2014 - 09:34 PM


 

Trucks down here, and there is a lot it is Texas haha, tend to have a lot of road rage and like to cut you off at the last minute. Then if you pass them or try to merge, they'll speed up and waste all of their gas like a bunch of redneck idiots.

9 times out of 10, they "cut you off at the last minute" because you refuse to let him in when the blinker first goes off. Dont blame truckers for your lack of courtesy, and wonder why they get vindictive.
What are you talking about? Honestly, I think It'd be best for you to just keep your ignorant mouth shut if all you're going to do is base your arguments off of assumptions. Get out of here...
 
I'm sure staying in my lane and seeing a truck riding behind me that decides to speed up and then cut me off without a blinker is my fault right. Right? Right? What f*cking world are you living in?
wooah there hes a trucker / marine. Dude hes obviously an jarhead who has earned his rights to drive how he wants :p

Pretty much. Your welcome.

What makes me road rage the most tho is dumbasses who drive at your speed when trying to merge into highways, expecting you to move over and let them in. Thats not how it works. You either speed up if youre ahead or slow down when youre behind. Its not the highway traffic's responsibility to accomodate the clueless on-rampers. Any highway patrolman will agree: if youre merging in, YOU make ur way in when theres an opening, you dont alter the traffic flow to create an opening for yourself.

And word of advice to you all, when youre in heavy traffic and see a huge distance between a truck and the car in front of it, dont be stupid and cut in, because if you cut in and end up with your tail clipped or rammed from behind by the trucker after you braked, the fault will be all yours. I already rammed one idiot in arizona, we pulled over, and he began talking sh*t, saying he was gonna sue me into poverty and own my truck and blah blah blah, then thru the first punch... I put him down and called the cops... Once the cops came, they split us up, i told them to check the dash cam footage... Aaand in the end, that dumb f*ck had to pay for my truck's damages AND to be a dick myself, i pressed charges for assault.

Be careful on the road, and dont be the cause of road rage.

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#29

Posted 07 June 2014 - 09:55 PM

Read this thought I'd post here.

 


Sting4S
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#30

Posted 07 June 2014 - 10:07 PM Edited by StingrayX, 07 June 2014 - 10:08 PM.

 

 

 

 

Trucks down here, and there is a lot it is Texas haha, tend to have a lot of road rage and like to cut you off at the last minute. Then if you pass them or try to merge, they'll speed up and waste all of their gas like a bunch of redneck idiots.

9 times out of 10, they "cut you off at the last minute" because you refuse to let him in when the blinker first goes off. Dont blame truckers for your lack of courtesy, and wonder why they get vindictive.
What are you talking about? Honestly, I think It'd be best for you to just keep your ignorant mouth shut if all you're going to do is base your arguments off of assumptions. Get out of here...
 
I'm sure staying in my lane and seeing a truck riding behind me that decides to speed up and then cut me off without a blinker is my fault right. Right? Right? What f*cking world are you living in?
wooah there hes a trucker / marine. Dude hes obviously an jarhead who has earned his rights to drive how he wants :p
What makes me road rage the most tho is dumbasses who drive at your speed when trying to merge into highways, expecting you to move over and let them in. Thats not how it works. You either speed up if youre ahead or slow down when youre behind. Its not the highway traffic's responsibility to accomodate the clueless on-rampers.

Ever heard of yielding, bud? Educate yourself.

 

You're the type of person that we don't need on the road. Where and how did you get your license? You sound like an absolute dickhead of a driver, I'm just being completely honest with you.





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