Quantcast

Jump to content

» «
Photo

What's Johnny holding here?

44 replies to this topic
Drunken Cowboy
  • Drunken Cowboy

    Disreputable Mexican Pharmacist

  • Members
  • Joined: 18 Sep 2013
  • United-States
  • Best Topic 2013 "The Identity Crisis: The Problems with V's story."

#31

Posted 21 March 2014 - 11:47 PM

 

I think one company made some stupid f*cking simulator and it's just been one sick joke of trying to "out-stupid" one another with their sims...

 

I used to have Train Simulator back when I was a wee little kid, mostly due to the fact I obsess over trains. But yeah, the mundaneness and triviality of the games they're popping out nowadays is bewildering me. At first, simulator games concerned jobs that not many people could get, such as being an engineer or a pilot. Nowadays, they have games for working construction and driving forklifts, even though nearly anyone with a proper license can do those. 

 

And it's come to my attention that they now have underwater photography simulators. All of my wat.

 

2020372-cover_hires.jpg

 

 

Still a better game than GTA V.

  • Jeansowaty likes this

Peachrocks
  • Peachrocks

    Mark Chump

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Jun 2013

#32

Posted 22 March 2014 - 03:07 AM

Like I said, for the right audience it might be good.

 

Tell you want I want. Drunken Pub Brawl Simulator. Surely the Germans are familiar with this


Drunken Cowboy
  • Drunken Cowboy

    Disreputable Mexican Pharmacist

  • Members
  • Joined: 18 Sep 2013
  • United-States
  • Best Topic 2013 "The Identity Crisis: The Problems with V's story."

#33

Posted 22 March 2014 - 04:00 AM

Like I said, for the right audience it might be good.

 

Tell you want I want. Drunken Pub Brawl Simulator. Surely the Germans are familiar with this

 

Why would you need a simulator? You can live it from like... age 12 there.

  • Ledsbourne and nobum62 like this

universetwisters
  • universetwisters

    Ich liebe dich.

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Feb 2011
  • United-States

#34

Posted 22 March 2014 - 06:30 PM

Tell you want I want. Drunken Pub Brawl Simulator. Surely the Germans are familiar with this


I'd say Germans are more familiar with football riots, and even if they choose to do a game about that, it's last on their 2014 simulator list, seeing as they also have yet to make:

*Special needs teacher simulator
*Model helicopter repairman simulator
*Military parachute packing simulator
*Campus police simulator: Frankfurt University edition
*Subway graffiti removal simulator
*90s gabber DJ simulator
*Simulator designer simulator
*Hungarian pest control simulator

AND MANY MORE RIVETING SIMULATORS.
  • Peachrocks and nobum62 like this

Peachrocks
  • Peachrocks

    Mark Chump

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Jun 2013

#35

Posted 22 March 2014 - 07:14 PM

 

Tell you want I want. Drunken Pub Brawl Simulator. Surely the Germans are familiar with this


I'd say Germans are more familiar with football riots, and even if they choose to do a game about that, it's last on their 2014 simulator list, seeing as they also have yet to make:

*Special needs teacher simulator
*Model helicopter repairman simulator
*Military parachute packing simulator
*Campus police simulator: Frankfurt University edition
*Subway graffiti removal simulator
*90s gabber DJ simulator
*Simulator designer simulator
*Hungarian pest control simulator

AND MANY MORE RIVETING SIMULATORS.

 

 

I loled.. I can actually see some of these occurring... 

  • universetwisters likes this

Grievous
  • Grievous

    Wall of Text Armada

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Sep 2013

#36

Posted 12 May 2014 - 12:19 PM

What's Johnny holding?

A better question would be: why is it so resembling with This artworks showing This Guy?

 

640px-Trevor_Art-GTAV.jpg

 

Foreshadowing?!!


Drunken Cowboy
  • Drunken Cowboy

    Disreputable Mexican Pharmacist

  • Members
  • Joined: 18 Sep 2013
  • United-States
  • Best Topic 2013 "The Identity Crisis: The Problems with V's story."

#37

Posted 13 May 2014 - 04:35 AM

What's Johnny holding?

A better question would be: why is it so resembling with This artworks showing This Guy?

 

640px-Trevor_Art-GTAV.jpg

 

Foreshadowing?!!

 

BEKUZ DISS!1111 : 

73f687a60c91d5e5ac4b4978672aec0c.240x240

 

Or maybe holding a blugeoning weapon with two hands isn't really that all uncommon, especially when trying to convey a menacing appearance on a poster... Oh, and welcome back, Captain of the Wall-of-Text Armada Fleet


daliakiller
  • daliakiller

    weed farmer

  • Members
  • Joined: 02 Dec 2013
  • Brazil

#38

Posted 13 May 2014 - 05:03 AM

Love how this WHAT IS JK HOLDING became a SIMULATOR topic.
  • Jeansowaty likes this

Grievous
  • Grievous

    Wall of Text Armada

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Sep 2013

#39

Posted 13 May 2014 - 09:08 AM

Or maybe holding a blugeoning weapon with two hands isn't really that all uncommon, especially when trying to convey a menacing appearance on a poster...


Which reminds us of ...

640px-BillyGrey-Artwork.jpg
 
BEST FORESHADOWING EVER

Also !

640px-BrianJeremy-Artwork.jpg

It's official, Johnny has some serious issues with people holding a baseball bat ...
Which is why he got killed by having a bottle thrown at his face ...

No wait, that doesn't make sense, they can't even follow their own continuity right!

Hold on, there's more!

390px-JohnnyKlebitz-TLAD-Artwork2.jpg424px-Artwork-Vinewood_Trevor-GTAV.png

IT'S THE DUEL OF THE CENTURY ... THAT NEVER TOOK PLACE
  • B Dawg likes this

universetwisters
  • universetwisters

    Ich liebe dich.

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Feb 2011
  • United-States

#40

Posted 13 May 2014 - 09:48 PM

It's official, Johnny has some serious issues with people holding a baseball bat ...

 

RNGTA3CLAUDE.png

 

did he dided?

  • B Dawg, Jeansowaty and nobum62 like this

Jeansowaty
  • Jeansowaty

    Notorious fan of underground electronic music and Molly Schultz

  • Members
  • Joined: 31 Mar 2013
  • Poland

#41

Posted 15 May 2014 - 11:51 AM

4054_gta3_artwork.jpg
The Triad guy from GTA3 too...?


Grievous
  • Grievous

    Wall of Text Armada

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Sep 2013

#42

Posted 15 May 2014 - 04:00 PM

You thought Trevor head-stomping Johnny was awful?
Consider the alternative ...

640px-Artwork-FranklinandChop-GTAV.jpg

Think about it, Franklin and Trevor were on relatively good terms. Had Johnny still been alive, Trevor might have asked Franklin to accompany him in attacking the Lost, and Chop would have mauled Johnny to death, possibly eating his face and limbs.

No really, think about it, as part of 100% gold medal achievement you'll have to Control Chop When Killing Johnny.

IN FIRST PERSON VIEW

Probably as an ironic social commentary in contrast to the doggy style bit, and the chasing rednecks in the woods bit, here comes devouring meth addict bikers bit.

Also, our Bat related conspiracy continues with a fan favorite ...

"I don't need a bat to teach someone a lesson."

304px-Claude%27soutfit-GTAIV.jpg

Think about it, Niko is Claude reincarnated!

It's time for the duel of the century part II !!

640px-Trevor-GTAV-BaseballBat.pngBaseball_Bat.jpg

"AAAAAARRRGH! You killed the man who kidnapped my cousin five years ago! You stole my revenge!! Now pay with your skull!!"

Let the power of DLC come true!
Pray my brothers, pray!!
  • B Dawg and Ermac. like this

Peachrocks
  • Peachrocks

    Mark Chump

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Jun 2013

#43

Posted 15 May 2014 - 11:32 PM Edited by Peachrocks, 15 May 2014 - 11:32 PM.

And Niko took five years to act on this? Maybe they'll both get hit from behind by Angus. Or Lester. Or maybe both at the same time.

 

Don't dislike Niko but he DID kill Jason and possibly Jim.


universetwisters
  • universetwisters

    Ich liebe dich.

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Feb 2011
  • United-States

#44

Posted 16 May 2014 - 01:46 AM

Think about it, Franklin and Trevor were on relatively good terms. Had Johnny still been alive, Trevor might have asked Franklin to accompany him in attacking the Lost, and Chop would have mauled Johnny to death, possibly eating his face and limbs.

No really, think about it, as part of 100% gold medal achievement you'll have to Control Chop When Killing Johnny.

IN FIRST PERSON VIEW

Probably as an ironic social commentary in contrast to the doggy style bit, and the chasing rednecks in the woods bit, here comes devouring meth addict bikers bit.

 

That would be a much better way for Johnny to die, have him mauled by chop in that mission rather than have chop maul that O'Neil guy who shows up for only two minutes prior to that point.

Imagine his screams.


Grievous
  • Grievous

    Wall of Text Armada

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Sep 2013

#45

Posted 16 May 2014 - 04:10 PM

And Niko took five years to act on this? Maybe they'll both get hit from behind by Angus. Or Lester. Or maybe both at the same time.
 
Don't dislike Niko but he DID kill Jason and possibly Jim.


Niko always had a funny behavior with Johnny Klebitz; despite having killed Jason and a handful of other Lost bikers, he nonchalantly accompanies Johnny on a drug deal, and vaguely commented to Playboy X that "oh yes, I met some of the Lost bikers before".

After Roman is rescued, he even sends a text message to Niko explicitly saying that he was kidnapped by a biker ... and keep in mind that Niko has never came across any other biker gangs at this point, and he goes working with Johnny a second time, shaking hands, everything cool.

I can understand why Johnny wouldn't have suspected that Niko was the Slavic hitman who killed Jason, but Niko nonchalantly working with Johnny, twice? It's ...

Well put yourself in his shoes; if you just gunned down half a dozen members of a biker gang, would you be so confident as to go working with another member of this same gang?

So really, I wouldn't be surprised if Niko waits a whole five years before going "man I'm bored, Jacob my man, how about we go on a helitour and kill some bikers! the ragdoll physics should be fun!"

That would be a much better way for Johnny to die, have him mauled by chop in that mission rather than have chop maul that O'Neil guy who shows up for only two minutes prior to that point.

Imagine his screams.


There was a scene somewhat like this in another sandbox game, if you've played it you'll probably remember it, where a relatively calm and more or less badass character gets chopped to pieces by a handful of men wielding meat cleavers, in broad day light, in an open public space.

This scene emerged absolutely out of nowhere, and the screams the character made was also out-of-his-character, contributing to the horror.

It was arguably the most visually horrifying/shocking scene I've seen in a sandbox game, no Grand Theft Auto game ever made it pass beyond the goofiness aspect, not even V's "By the book" episode starring Trevor.

Hmm ... as I recall, Chop doesn't even kill the O'Neil brother, you have to kill him as Franklin, Chop just stalls O'Neil, somewhat.




2 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 2 guests, 0 anonymous users