After hours and hours of deep thought and to some extend, soul searching, I think I may have a solution. STOP DOING RANDOM DM'S. Open the map, hover over DM which is acceptable to your liking, press square(if your PS3). Invite said friends. F*ck me it's no hard is it.
And wind up in a bottomless queue? Whether you host it yourself or join it, chances are low you'll end up somewhere faster than if you search via Join Random DM.
What actually needs to happen:
Online >> Join Job >> Join Random DM >> Join R* Created
Online >> Join Job >> Join Random DM >> Join R* Verified
It's that simple.