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Guys, I just f**ked up....

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askinnywhitedildo
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#1

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:45 PM

Last night my girlfriend was telling me she was talking to a guy down the street who she met on facebook, only because she wanted to know where he lived. She met him on some website and started talking to him, just because he lived near us and she wanted to know where.

 

Well, I was rather pissed off, and we got in a fight. It wasn't a bad fight, really just us both being total smartasses back and forth to each other. She then went to bed because I wouldn't stop being a ass. So she went to bed, and she left her laptop sitting out, and she only closed the lid to the laptop, she didn't power it down. So that meant whatever she was signed onto, I could just get on the laptop and go look at it.

 

So I went on her facebook, and the guy and her didn't really say anything, other than about where we live. But I didn't care, I killed it. I sent a message to him saying "Excuse me, I'm having explosive diarrhea and my asshole is on fire, I gtg" and then a picture of a Disney character looking retarded saying "Didney Worl" and then I said "I LOV DIDNEY WORL". I left it at that, because I figured any guy would get turned off at that.

 

She got up today, and found it (I intended her to find it), and it has not ended well. She has my facebook login, because I'm not "trustworthy" and she has sent very hateful messages to my ex. Making it look like I am telling my ex she has ugly nipples, and gives bad head, along with other stuff. 

 

She has now taken my car and left, and I am stuck at home with no knowledge to where she is. The last thing she said to me is "f*ck off, I hate you, and I'm never coming back."

 

What do I do to fix this? This whole thing is so stupid, idk what to do to fix it. And I really need my car back. 

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OFWGKTADGAFLLBBLSBFBN
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#2

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:48 PM

Show her this thread.


RoadRunner71
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#3

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:49 PM

The dildo, my friend, use the dildo.
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Ermac
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#4

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:49 PM

Press and hold select, scroll down and hit "Empty personal vehicle".

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Typhus
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#5

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:49 PM

So...basically, you couldn't stand the idea of a woman being friends with a man and tried to dictate who she could and couldn't hang out with?

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skittlez86
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#6

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:51 PM

call the cops or a hitman any one will do oh i got it call up some prostitutes 


Eris
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#7

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:52 PM

You sound like an asshole OP. I hope this teaches you a lesson.


Frank Brown
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#8

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:52 PM

So...basically, you couldn't stand the idea of a woman being friends with a man and tried to dictate who she could and couldn't hang out with?

Doesn't everyone do this?


Kippers
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#9

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:53 PM Edited by Kippers, 20 December 2013 - 11:54 PM.

It could be worse. She could not be insured to drive your car and crash it.

 

You sound in the wrong over this one though bro, so dunno. Start begging if she comes back.


askinnywhitedildo
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#10

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:54 PM Edited by askinnywhitedildo, 20 December 2013 - 11:55 PM.

You sound like an asshole OP. I hope this teaches you a lesson.

 

I know... I didn't think this would happen over me just saying 2 dumb things. 

So...basically, you couldn't stand the idea of a woman being friends with a man and tried to dictate who she could and couldn't hang out with?

No, well kinda. She does the same thing to me and she's way worse about it. I thought this time, I'd act like it too.

 

EDIT

@kippers

She doesn't even have a drivers license...


Typhus
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#11

Posted 20 December 2013 - 11:56 PM

Maybe you need to start seeing her as a person instead of property.


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#12

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:01 AM

OP, you clearly made some asshole moves with her laptop and the jealousy thing, but I want to go back to the beginning....

 

How does one meet someone on Facebook? Why does she want to know where a stranger lives? Why would she tell your ex she gives bad head just because you 'fraped' her by updating her status to say she has diarrhoea?

 

Too many plot holes in this story, you both sound crazy.

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John Smith
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#13

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:05 AM Edited by niko bellic half brother, 21 December 2013 - 12:13 AM.

Facebook...

 

 

 

 

 

 

meme-laughing-guy-wallpaper-1920x1080.jp

 

When will you folks learn...


Sup3rman
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#14

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:06 AM Edited by Sup3rman, 21 December 2013 - 12:07 AM.

Its like a soap opera or a badly made movie. Basically, you got what you deserved. I mean, you saw she was just asking where the guy lived, why go nuts? Its not like they said, "oh i wanna f*ck you so bad" or something. Innocent stuff. Ofc, when she basically stole your car, you can contact the police and not this forum to be honest.

 

But yeah, basically the first reply here by mr OFWGKTADGAFLLBBLSBFBN got it right on what to do :D Hilarious comment to be honest. No offense to the OP.


Pyrrhic
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#15

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:07 AM

Wow OP, you're a dick (well actually you're a skinny white dildo but that's beside the point).
You are obvious a little bit paranoid and overprotective, why don't you just relax and let it be? I mean it's not like she was talking dirty with him or anything like that, they were having a civil conversation about normal things, right?

Lazor Guns
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#16

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:14 AM

Is this for real?

 

Either you're making this story up to get attention, or you two are insane.


Banana
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#17

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:17 AM

OP she's definitely railing that guy right now.
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John Smith
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#18

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:25 AM

OP she's definitely railing that guy right now.

You blame her?


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#19

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:33 AM

OP deserves it.


SonofYankton
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#20

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:40 AM

The f*ck is this sh*t? lol


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#21

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:41 AM

I suggest you should date this guy she has talked with as he is making you jealous and you probably find him attractive. That is the only way she'll want to come back to you, you have to make her jealous.

 

NEXT.


Harley
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#22

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:42 AM

Can I get a look at those nipples

universetwisters
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#23

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:52 AM

didney_worl_hurrr_by_crowhitewolf-d4nutb

 

OT: Don't date, ever. It's a waste of time and nothing casual sex can't solve.

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#24

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:55 AM

What propelled you to do that anyway?  You obviously have trust issues, and unless she's done something to you in the past to warrant those issues, you're really not being fair to her.  I understand if, in the past, you were hurt in some way that caused you to lose trust in women, but you really have to put full faith in a relationship unless something distrustful happens.  Now you're gonna have trust issues for the rest of the relationship unless you really talk it out.

 

So yeah, if she shows her face, talk it out. Tell her why you felt the need to do it.  You probably have to figure that out yourself, first.  She deserves a massive apology.


theadmiral
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#25

Posted 21 December 2013 - 12:56 AM

First of all, this story is completely made up.

 

Second of all, above.


askinnywhitedildo
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#26

Posted 21 December 2013 - 01:07 AM

The story isn't made up, I'm dead ass serious.

 

I trust her, I do. But she's gotten mad at me for talking to random girls before, so I did this as kinda a joke really. I think the things I said, it was obvious it was a joke. But she didn't take it in a joking way.

 

I'll try to send her this thread. Now I feel really bad for my joke, and I want her back. 


OFWGKTADGAFLLBBLSBFBN
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#27

Posted 21 December 2013 - 01:10 AM

The story isn't made up, I'm dead ass serious.

 

I trust her, I do. But she's gotten mad at me for talking to random girls before, so I did this as kinda a joke really. I think the things I said, it was obvious it was a joke. But she didn't take it in a joking way.

 

I'll try to send her this thread. Now I feel really bad for my joke, and I want her back. 

Yes! I should be a psychiatrist.


Jeone
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#28

Posted 21 December 2013 - 01:19 AM

Call the fuzz

018361
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#29

Posted 21 December 2013 - 01:34 AM Edited by 018361, 21 December 2013 - 08:55 AM.

Someone dun goof'd.


Ciaran
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#30

Posted 21 December 2013 - 01:37 AM

Press and hold select, scroll down and hit "Empty personal vehicle".


I lol'd :lol:




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