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I don't want to grow up

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jln22
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#1

Posted 15 November 2013 - 01:56 PM

Seriously, I really don't want to become a man. Not yet. My behaviour and thoughts are still childish and with this social anxiety things are even harder.
I am 18 years old, turning 19 in January so basically I am a free man, so many times I heard that from different elder people. The thing is that not that I dislike it, but I see no change nor I want to change. I want to stay the same confused teen that fights against the teen problems like depression, not having a girlfriend, looks etc. While those were a pain in the ass few months ago, I started loving them, seeing that life is tougher than what I thought.
But f*cking hell, as I said I am 18, recently moved to a new city whom I had no clue about and I was totally unused to take care of myself. Until now, my mother would have done anything for me, I was just sitting in bed and watch. Easily I managed to get things sorted as they were out of my head, managed to make new friends when I lacked social skills and things were going better than what I thought they would. The fact ia that I don't want to be an independent man with a job, a girlfriend and a car. I think I might not be ready. My mindset is not matured enough. I wanna live playing games, sitting lazy and eventually don't study or sh*t. There's no possibility, right?
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lt_yao
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#2

Posted 15 November 2013 - 01:58 PM

Oh, paying taxes is cool, having to worry about your income is cool, your family plans don't stress you out, that's for sure. It's the best time ever. Responsibility is a fun time!


Victor_Mangano
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#3

Posted 15 November 2013 - 02:08 PM

Join a hippie commune.

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Typhus
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#4

Posted 15 November 2013 - 02:09 PM

No one grows up, they grow IN. Slowly, you start to feel more comfortable in your skin. You remain who you were, but remove the chaff and refuse you no longer need.

Know why people seem to change so much? Because in their search for maturity, they allow others to define them. Whether it be societal expectations of a career or archaic notions of family and monogamy. The person remains the same, but the world pressures you to apply a great many fetters to yourself until you settle.

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WinterEdit
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#5

Posted 15 November 2013 - 03:03 PM Edited by WinterEdit, 15 November 2013 - 03:04 PM.

I wanna live playing games, sitting lazy and eventually don't study or sh*t. There's no possibility, right?

You could be the next pewdiepie-840460-l-78x78.png in that case. :)

yeah it is pewdiepie. I actually like his videos.

F'ck me, right?

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RoadRunner71
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#6

Posted 15 November 2013 - 03:23 PM

 I wanna live playing games, sitting lazy and eventually don't study or sh*t. There's no possibility, right?

Don't worry. Now tramps have laptops too.

 

tramp.jpg


jln22
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#7

Posted 15 November 2013 - 03:45 PM


I wanna live playing games, sitting lazy and eventually don't study or sh*t. There's no possibility, right?

You could be the next pewdiepie-840460-l-78x78.png in that case. :)
yeah it is pewdiepie. I actually like his videos.
F'ck me, right?
I don't know the guy.

Myron
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#8

Posted 15 November 2013 - 03:47 PM

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WinterEdit
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#9

Posted 15 November 2013 - 04:36 PM Edited by WinterEdit, 15 November 2013 - 04:36 PM.

 

 

I wanna live playing games, sitting lazy and eventually don't study or sh*t. There's no possibility, right?

You could be the next pewdiepie-840460-l-78x78.png in that case. :)
yeah it is pewdiepie. I actually like his videos.
F'ck me, right?
I don't know the guy.

 

That man is Felix Kjellberg.

 

Also known to be the guy named "PewDiePie".

And he makes game videos on YouTube and profits greatly from them. Follow his footsteps and fame will arise.

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Tchuck
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#10

Posted 15 November 2013 - 05:19 PM

Go become a QA analyst at some game dev studio. You'll sit your days playing games, albeit unfinished, get paid just enough to survive, and have all the time in the world for games at home. Keep doing that for a couple of years, rejecting promotions, and not wanting to improve, and you'll get your dream "life".

 

Or harden the f*ck and become a grown up.


TensaZangetsu
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#11

Posted 15 November 2013 - 05:27 PM

I have no life, no job, I have aspergers, I sit at home all day and watch f*cking japanese cartoons because I am a very socially awkward person. I know that feel bro. I even had to quit high school because of the bullies.


headmetalbanger
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#12

Posted 15 November 2013 - 06:25 PM Edited by headmetalbanger, 15 November 2013 - 06:51 PM.

I went through something similar (I think my life never be like my dreams) and in the last two years I returned to my studies and take my future projects to be somebody, I'm happier now to my 23 years, that when I was your age.

 

You have to take one day responsibilities or be a nobody forever. Think again.
 


Dale Nixon
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#13

Posted 15 November 2013 - 07:39 PM

i came in here to post this you rotten bastard


Laura91
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#14

Posted 15 November 2013 - 07:49 PM

You grow older, you grow up..that's the way it goes. Sure, you can still retain some bits from your youth that make you happy, but you can't cling to the idea that "I don't want to grow up" forever. It needs to happen sooner or later. Having said that, I think I've struck a nice balance between growing up and handling the usual things like paying bills, etc, but in other ways, I still see myself as a bit of a kid.


Lucchese
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#15

Posted 15 November 2013 - 07:58 PM

Well you are a member of this forum. No growing up required here, so you should be in safe grounds.


uzi 9mm
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#16

Posted 15 November 2013 - 08:14 PM

To be honest I think the child in people never dies, secretly, even when you become an old man. Being a child is fun, I just regret the times when I was a child where I thought 'muh muh muh, I wanna be a grown up so I can do what I want', when you can actually get away with more being a child. I'll never be able to go in a playplace and dive into the multi colored balls without looking weird now, and I'll never get to drive one of those little electric cars kids go about in, despite the fact I can drive with my license, I never got one of those little electric toy cars and I never will.

 

But more to the point, everyone has to survive, you need to work and earn any time spent playing games, or lazing about, because unfortunately, life isn't relaxing unless your name is Prince George...

 

Regular people need to earn a living, and it's a tough ride to success, you have to start somewhere though. 

 

I'd like to be driving the gold 63 plate Rolls Royce I saw driving beside me in London today, but I doubt it will ever happen, since when people see things they want it, but you can't always expect to get it. And that's what life is mate, unfair. Growing up should be the least of your worries.


trip
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#17

Posted 15 November 2013 - 09:06 PM

You don't have to grow up. People just think they have to be 'adult'.

I'm pretty sure I never grew up, yet I still own a house, car, and have a job.

D- Ice
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#18

Posted 15 November 2013 - 09:21 PM Edited by D- Ice, 15 November 2013 - 10:26 PM.

A big issue is letting people define who you are. I suspect the many older people who tell you that you are a free man are doing so either to praise you based on your age, or to manipulate you to start acting the way they want (the stereotypical adult). I also get the impression that you are feeling anxiety out of fear of beig forced to change from the situation you like to the "independent man with a job, a girlfriend and a car."

 

I have made the mistake of letting others define me and my priorities, and I deeply regret it today. The best person to set your priorities and lifestyle is you - after all, IMO the whole point of life is to live in a way that pleases you. (Many people will argue that this is inherently hedonistic and selfish, but IMO people do "selfless" things like giving money to charity as it makes them feel better too.)

 

If you want my advice, I would suggest that you think through what you really want, and how you want to live your life. Then you have to try to find a feasible way to achieve that.

For example, you said you like to play video games, so you need to figure out a way to afford the games and consoles, as well as other living costs (if they aren't being provided by family etc...).

 

In a way, being an adult is in fact liberating in that you are free to set you own aims and make your own choices.

Wish you all the best. :^:

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Joe Chip
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#19

Posted 15 November 2013 - 09:43 PM Edited by Joe Chip, 15 November 2013 - 09:44 PM.

("I'm a Toys-R-US kid!!")

 

You don't mature by sitting in your bed letting your mom watch you, like you said you did. You mature through experience, and what better way to experience things than to do things?

 

Nobody's out to hurt you or kill you (unless they're angry at you, or mugging you), and while nobody's out there to help you through life either you're going to either ask for help, or help yourself when you absolutely need it, if it ever comes down to it. Humans are good at adapting, and almost everyone else in the past thousand years or so has adapted to individual adulthood, so it shouldn't be as difficult as it seems. You'll also adapt to the loss of free time, and even better you actually have a choice of where your life goes now. You have the power to find a job that allows you as much, or even more free time than you had when you were a teenager. You have to find out what it takes to enjoy yourself, because the other option is being miserable about something you can't change.


jln22
  • jln22

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#20

Posted 15 November 2013 - 10:15 PM

Look how awesome that would be.

 


El_Diablo
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#21

Posted 15 November 2013 - 10:23 PM

Not yet. My behaviour and thoughts are still childish

well that explains your posting history.


Zotak
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#22

Posted 15 November 2013 - 10:38 PM

Jeez, another confused kid. "insert Nicolas Cage meme""

 

As I said in a very similar topic, more or less, chill the f*ck up, you'll grow up and things will improve, trust me.

 

Don't be a f*cking sissy, and lazy, get off your ass and do something like walking around your block atleast.


Mr Scratch
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#23

Posted 15 November 2013 - 11:21 PM

Join the military if you feel like you lack purpose.


WhatsStrength
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#24

Posted 15 November 2013 - 11:53 PM Edited by whatsstrength, 15 November 2013 - 11:55 PM.

It sucks at first but you get over it. Depending on what kind of work you find, you may make some new friends that would be happy to hang out with you outside of the job. 

 

Oh and I've always loved this poster when it comes to the discussion of maturity and being an adult.

 

b322d1_1186672.jpg

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trip
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#25

Posted 16 November 2013 - 12:03 AM Edited by trip, 16 November 2013 - 12:04 AM.

Oh and I've always loved this poster when it comes to the discussion of maturity and being an adult.

 

-poster-

 

Yeah...and this song didn't make sense to me until I was in my later 30s.

I was so much older then.  I'm younger than that now.


ShadowDog94
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#26

Posted 16 November 2013 - 02:07 AM

You sound like a lazy f*cker who never wants to work a day in his life. Get up off your ass and do something with your life. Don't just sit around playing video games leading a meaningless existence. Life is what you make of it.


Zotak
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#27

Posted 16 November 2013 - 02:20 AM

If non of the well-meant replies works for you, you could cut off your legs and be forever like a midget.


Typhus
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#28

Posted 16 November 2013 - 02:31 AM

You sound like a lazy f*cker who never wants to work a day in his life. Get up off your ass and do something with your life. Don't just sit around playing video games leading a meaningless existence. Life is what you make of it.

But how is working 'doing something with your life'? All that does is force you to waste time performing menial tasks for no good reason.

Employment is no sign of maturity.

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ShadowDog94
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#29

Posted 16 November 2013 - 02:49 AM

 

You sound like a lazy f*cker who never wants to work a day in his life. Get up off your ass and do something with your life. Don't just sit around playing video games leading a meaningless existence. Life is what you make of it.

But how is working 'doing something with your life'? All that does is force you to waste time performing menial tasks for no good reason.

Employment is no sign of maturity.

 

I would rather work and be independent, paying for my own house, car, mortgage etc, and go to bed at the end of the day knowing that I'm making an honest living, rather than be like the OP leeching off his mother, probably sitting around on welfare leading a dull and mediocre existence. He will most likely end up depressed due to lack of social interaction and a feeling of meaningless in his life. I know because I've been through it myself. I'm currently unemployed and trying to find a job. But I haven't had any luck, and being at home with nothing to do besides play Ps3 gets boring and depressing, and most people I know are actually busy with their lives most of the time, so I don't really get to see them much.

 

If the OP continues with his current mentality then he will probably reach the point where he's not fit to take on any job, because he's too lazy to do anything, and he will become even more socially awkward because of the lack of interaction, which will lead to an even more tedious and repetitive existence as he continues to sit on his ass playing video games.


018361
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#30

Posted 16 November 2013 - 03:15 AM

I have felt the same way before, but eventually you will realize that if you stay that way you will end up wanting the exact opposite like me. The grass is always greener on the other side. It may be harsh, but what everyone else is saying is true. It's better to grow up now and be prepared to be grown up then to be like me and be childish for a long time and end up regretting the decision later when you actually want to grow up. You have to realize that even if you stay a child your friends and life in general won't. The world moves at it's own pace and we just follow along, but when you become an adult it will start speeding up and you will want to start stopping. The problem is that even if you stop the world itself will move without you and continue, it is up to you to soldier on and go with it. It's okay to slow down and smell the roses every now and again, but you have to remember to keep pushing on or else you'll lose the war. I have many regrets, but at this moment in time my most outstanding one was wanting to remain a child. I saw this video not too long ago and it helps me to remember what I need to prioritize in my life. I think it is somewhat relateable to your situation. http://www.youtube.c...KF38B7Q&index=1





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