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Anyone in here suffer from depression?

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Virtual-Antics
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#601

Posted 10 January 2018 - 02:17 PM

Yeah. I've had depression for most of my life. I was diagnosed with a rare condition in my mid teens. Depression/anxiety is part and parcel of that.

 

The past year and ten months has been tough on my mental wellbeing. Long story short, I've dealt with three noisy neighbours and unfair treatment from the authorities for just trying to deal with it. Long term sleep deprivation has aggravated my depression and anxiety. It's affected my physical health too. Reporting it has been stressful because it's just dragged on and on. The authorities are lying about the whole mess. The stress has given me ecsema and the lack of sleep has put my condition at risk. I'm still feeling the effects even if the noise seems to have calmed down. One of the noisy neighbours is still there though.

 

It's been a vicious cycle. I've tried to go out and enjoy myself but it's burned me out mentally and physically.

 

This month, I'm seeking legal action for discrimination.


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#602

Posted 12 January 2018 - 05:47 PM

Life long here. Me and my depression settled a pact long time ago. :/


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#603

Posted 15 January 2018 - 12:55 PM

Life long here. Me and my depression settled a pact long time ago. :/


You just need to beat the crap out of it and show it who's boss.
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Adrenalist
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#604

Posted 20 January 2018 - 05:27 AM

Depression is the consolation prize of a perfectionist
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Cutter De Blanc
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#605

Posted 25 January 2018 - 11:04 PM Edited by Cutter De Blanc, 25 January 2018 - 11:07 PM.

I feel like my mental state is circumstantial, rather than biochemical. Without going into the embarrassing details of my day-to-day, I live a life that would break almost anyone I know. Every day is usually a little worse than the last as tends to be the case the case with entropy. Something else I can't do well, someone else who won't listen, more things break with no money to fix them. Every day it gets a little worse.

Most days I try to ignore my problems. Some days it's harder than others.

I'm not sure what it says about me when I make a cry for help and no one even listens or appears to acknowledge it. Am I really that unlikable?

I swear every time I let my shell down even a little, I'm reminded why I don't. Forget it.


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#606

Posted 26 January 2018 - 01:12 AM

 

 

I swear every time I let my shell down even a little, I'm reminded why I don't. Forget it.

Now you're just being shellfish.

 

Seriously, can't you change anything in your lifestyle to make it better? Anything? In this life, never expect help from anybody except from yourself. As harsh as this may sound, you are the only one who can change your life. Not saying its fair, its just that life is a bitch in general. You can become better if you just continue to push and care less about people around you who don't care about you.


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#607

Posted 27 January 2018 - 05:13 AM

I don't know many people I can talk to about things I'm going through, it's easy for me to shut down. Most people think I'm ignorant but I just find it difficult to open up and I'm left asking myself "what's the f*cking point?"
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BlackScout
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#608

Posted 30 January 2018 - 12:14 AM Edited by BlackScout, 30 January 2018 - 12:17 AM.

It's eating me alive lately. I sleep too little or too much. I act like an asshole, I feel like sh*t. I'm hopeless. Life doesn't seem to cooperate either. It's a f*cking mess.

Things go well for maybe a day or two then it all goes to sh*t again... Frustrating.

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#609

Posted 30 January 2018 - 03:44 PM Edited by Zodape, 30 January 2018 - 03:47 PM.

I don't currently have depression but I was diagnosed back when I was like 15 I think. It's weird because I had friends and a loving family but I completely ignored them. I felt like my friends never really appreciated me, like I had this idea that they thought they were better than me, I don't really know why (they are actually great people, we still hang out to this day). As for my family, I felt like I was a disappointment to them. I was doing really badly at school and I remember lying yo them all the time about my grades and stuff. I even made my mom cry once, it was horrible. I felt like I was living under both of my older sisters' shadow (both were doing great at college, they had jobs and were in relationships), while I was doing sh*t at school and only played videogames all day. Also had to deal with bullying of course. The only thing I felt I was good at was drawing, but since I thought it was a pointless skill that nobody really gave a sh*t about, I still felt useless.

I was doing so bad at school I almost end up repeating a grade but by sheer luck I didn't (that's a story for another day). Despite doing sh*t at school I still somehow took it seriously, so the thought of repeating a grade scared me sh*tless. The next year I started doing well at school. I don't how I did it, like after saving my ass from grade retention my mind did a 180 and I became an okay student. I don't know how it happened but it did. So yeah being better at school slowly improved my life, I know it sounds dumb but it really did. Like I didn't feel completely useless anymore. It still took years but eventually my mind completely changed. I'm 23 now. I started focusing on drawing and sh*t, and I'm currently in college. I still can't get a girlfriend but it's fine, I just try to focus on my stuff.

Basically, I had everything and yet I felt I had nothing.

I mean if I could suggest anything, I'd say do something, get a job, for starters. It's not gonna gix your problems but it will get some basic structure in your life. Clean your room, I know it sounds dumb but, you know, baby steps (I've been watching Jordan Peterson quite a bit lol). You don't realise how badly a chaotic room can do to your mood. Try to find a passion. I don't know, I prolly sound dumb but I'm just trying to help.

Yesterday I found out my best friend is suffering from deppression but his situation is completely different than mine, much worse actually: he's not studying anything, he's got a sh*t dead end job and hebasically hates his entire family (this is not him just making sh*t up, his family truly are a bunch of scumbags, which I guess makes things even worse). I also think he has some alcohol problems, but I'm not sure yet. And his girlfriend told me that she feels she can't handle him anymore, so that's great. Things seem really f*cked up but we gotta stay positive. If there's something that helped me through deppression is hope, not in the religious sense but hope that things will get better, somehow. Doesn't matter how, just keep hoping that things will improve.

Anyways I wrote too much.

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#610

Posted 01 February 2018 - 08:12 PM

After half year of doctors can't diagnosis me they're thinking now that my disease is happening because of mental state. Possibly a depression. And now they made me to start using some weak antidepressants.

Can depression happen if you can't really see any worthy reason or signs of its presence?


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#611

Posted 14 February 2018 - 08:43 AM

After half year of doctors can't diagnosis me they're thinking now that my disease is happening because of mental state. Possibly a depression. And now they made me to start using some weak antidepressants.

Can depression happen if you can't really see any worthy reason or signs of its presence?

 

Sometimes depression can be sneaky and show up very slowly, so slowly that when the first "warnings" arises you think it's just a bad day or moment, but it's already a bit late.

Also, there's no "worthy reason", because what is painful to you could mean nothing to me and viceversa. The only thing that matters is how you live it.

 

I went through depression nearly four years ago. When it all started I really didn't know what my problem was, I didn't know what brought me there. Now I still have to get out of it, but a constant psychotherapy (see: going to the therapist) and consequent medical treatment managed to strongly improve the situation and help me figure out the origin of my sickness.

It has been, and still is, a huge inner journey, and it's also the ultimate form of self-respect, and even if I stil have a long way to go I'm already proud of what I did and what I achieved.

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JaberDoe
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#612

Posted 14 February 2018 - 12:02 PM

After half year of doctors can't diagnosis me they're thinking now that my disease is happening because of mental state. Possibly a depression. And now they made me to start using some weak antidepressants.

Can depression happen if you can't really see any worthy reason or signs of its presence?

 

Wish you the best, bud.

 

What Bruce Khansay said.  It creeps up on you like a freakin' shadow and you probably won't know the cause.

Heck, I still don't what caused mine before, and I may never know.

 

I would also say it's like a chain reaction; you get uncomfortable at times for no reason, then the chest pains, then the confusion, then the anxiety attacks, then the need to scream/cry and then the really bad stuff.

 

To repeat Bruce: it's an inner journey. 

When you get out, you'll be so damn grateful and happy.

 

Love the profile pic, BTW.   Durarara?

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#613

Posted 14 February 2018 - 06:22 PM Edited by Sanches, 14 February 2018 - 06:23 PM.

Wish you the best, bud.

 

What Bruce Khansay said.  It creeps up on you like a freakin' shadow and you probably won't know the cause.

Heck, I still don't what caused mine before, and I may never know.

 

I would also say it's like a chain reaction; you get uncomfortable at times for no reason, then the chest pains, then the confusion, then the anxiety attacks, then the need to scream/cry and then the really bad stuff.

 

To repeat Bruce: it's an inner journey. 

When you get out, you'll be so damn grateful and happy.

 

Love the profile pic, BTW.   Durarara?

Thanks for clearing it up, guys! Now i atleast know this situation a bit more.

And yep, kinda of Durarara pic, but it was made by my friend without intention to make it look like Durarara.
But i tried to redraw it, you can take a look:

Spoiler

Bruce Khansey
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#614

Posted 15 February 2018 - 08:04 AM

 

After half year of doctors can't diagnosis me they're thinking now that my disease is happening because of mental state. Possibly a depression. And now they made me to start using some weak antidepressants.

Can depression happen if you can't really see any worthy reason or signs of its presence?

 

Wish you the best, bud.

 

What Bruce Khansay said.  It creeps up on you like a freakin' shadow and you probably won't know the cause.

Heck, I still don't what caused mine before, and I may never know.

 

I would also say it's like a chain reaction; you get uncomfortable at times for no reason, then the chest pains, then the confusion, then the anxiety attacks, then the need to scream/cry and then the really bad stuff.

 

To repeat Bruce: it's an inner journey. 

When you get out, you'll be so damn grateful and happy.

 

Love the profile pic, BTW.   Durarara?

 

^Yes, it's also a chain reaction. I think you experiment a kind of pain you never had before, at least that's what happened to me. I remember one time when I was coming back home on foot, I cried for almost twenty minutes, coughing because I was close to throw up, and when I arrived home I felt like I was dead tired and collapsed in bed.

 

It's a subjective thing, but you get the gist of it.

 

And yes, getting out of it is the greatest accomplishment you can ever achieve in your life. I feel sorry for those who deep down know they have something wrong but they just ignore or avoid it. People like us chose the most difficult and painful path, but it's the right and most rewarding one.

 

@you, JaberDoe: I'm sorry to read that you still don't know the cause, hope you will as soon as possible.

 

 

Wish you the best, bud.

 

What Bruce Khansay said.  It creeps up on you like a freakin' shadow and you probably won't know the cause.

Heck, I still don't what caused mine before, and I may never know.

 

I would also say it's like a chain reaction; you get uncomfortable at times for no reason, then the chest pains, then the confusion, then the anxiety attacks, then the need to scream/cry and then the really bad stuff.

 

To repeat Bruce: it's an inner journey. 

When you get out, you'll be so damn grateful and happy.

 

Love the profile pic, BTW.   Durarara?

Thanks for clearing it up, guys! Now i atleast know this situation a bit more.

And yep, kinda of Durarara pic, but it was made by my friend without intention to make it look like Durarara.
But i tried to redraw it, you can take a look:

Spoiler

 

 

Don't mention it! I know how it feels and I'm glad to help when I can

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#615

Posted 15 February 2018 - 09:17 AM

I was close to throw up

Well, that's the main symptom of my disease. Well, it wasn't like i was surely about to throw up, but for the past half year i was feeling like i could do it.
The reason why doctors stated that this may be caused by depression, is because almost every analysis were ok and even gastroscopy didn't show anything unusual.


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#616

Posted 15 February 2018 - 10:15 AM

 

I was close to throw up

Well, that's the main symptom of my disease. Well, it wasn't like i was surely about to throw up, but for the past half year i was feeling like i could do it.
The reason why doctors stated that this may be caused by depression, is because almost every analysis were ok and even gastroscopy didn't show anything unusual.

 

 

Same for me, I wasn't about to throw up but I felt that I could have done it.

 

I also remember that before it all started, many years ago I had issues with food, as I was feeling stuffed after just a couple of bites. With hindsight, those were the first signs.

 

As for you, at this point I think it's psychosomatic, it's not physical but mental. Do you go to the therapist or have you ever thought about it?

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#617

Posted 15 February 2018 - 10:39 AM

Just gets worse and worse here with all of my mental disorders piling up. I can't even take meds since they don't work on me and is too expensive.


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#618

Posted 15 February 2018 - 10:52 AM

Same for me, I wasn't about to throw up but I felt that I could have done it.

 

I also remember that before it all started, many years ago I had issues with food, as I was feeling stuffed after just a couple of bites. With hindsight, those were the first signs.

 

As for you, at this point I think it's psychosomatic, it's not physical but mental. Do you go to the therapist or have you ever thought about it?

You know, after you mentioned it, i actually recall similar food problems. Like i wasn't eating much many years ago, this caused problems with my weight ect.
And i didn't go to therapist yet, because i've got an appointment with a doctor in the end of this month, we're gonna sort some things out and then we'll see where do i move on after.
Thank you!

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#619

Posted 15 February 2018 - 07:11 PM

I think even if I tried and struggled so hard to make things better, I'll probably end my life with suicide.


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#620

Posted 16 February 2018 - 07:47 AM Edited by Bruce Khansey, 16 February 2018 - 07:50 AM.

@Gummy: couldn't you try to change your medical therapy? It's not that easy to find the right one, maybe you just need to change it.

 

 

Same for me, I wasn't about to throw up but I felt that I could have done it.

 

I also remember that before it all started, many years ago I had issues with food, as I was feeling stuffed after just a couple of bites. With hindsight, those were the first signs.

 

As for you, at this point I think it's psychosomatic, it's not physical but mental. Do you go to the therapist or have you ever thought about it?

You know, after you mentioned it, i actually recall similar food problems. Like i wasn't eating much many years ago, this caused problems with my weight ect.
And i didn't go to therapist yet, because i've got an appointment with a doctor in the end of this month, we're gonna sort some things out and then we'll see where do i move on after.
Thank you!

 

 

Yeah, eating issues is one of the most-common symptoms when you're depressed.

As for the doctor, good, I hope you start taking good care of you and get well soon.

You're welcome!

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#621

Posted 19 February 2018 - 05:37 AM Edited by JaberDoe, 19 February 2018 - 05:38 AM.

Thanks for clearing it up, guys! Now i atleast know this situation a bit more.

And yep, kinda of Durarara pic, but it was made by my friend without intention to make it look like Durarara.
But i tried to redraw it, you can take a look:

Spoiler

 

 

Cool!

 

Makes me wish there was a cat ear hat/accessories in GTA Online.  

I feel like they'll add that at some point...hopefully!

 

@Bruce - Thanks, bud.   :)

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#622

Posted 19 February 2018 - 06:23 PM Edited by HeavyDuke, 01 March 2018 - 01:12 PM.

 

Gotta keep it fresh, or your head can turn you insane. I have been there far too much myself, really..

Or just settle on the insane side of the mind.


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#623

Posted 20 February 2018 - 06:12 PM

Nah, meds are too expensive, too difficult to obtain, and too far out of reach. I had to spend $100 for a diagnose of 1 psychiatric disorder and got a lot of trouble with my parents. Imagine if I had to diagnose for over 10 disorders. I've lost my current prescription as well.


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#624

Posted 22 February 2018 - 07:32 PM

Yes I have on and off for many years.


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#625

Posted 22 February 2018 - 08:06 PM

I suffer from chronic depression. 


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#626

Posted 27 February 2018 - 04:09 AM

Yes, I suffer from a mild depression.


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#627

Posted 27 February 2018 - 01:03 PM

Just checking up, I've got no sort of depression but I have a few friends with it. Everytime I try to help them by asking them for the reason they're depressed, they either tell there's no reason or tell me that I'm not a physcratist so stop asking. Are you guys depressed for absolutely no reason or do you have something that makes you depressed? Please keep in mind that it's not some kind of insult and I'm just curious 


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#628

Posted 27 February 2018 - 05:11 PM

Just checking up, I've got no sort of depression but I have a few friends with it. Everytime I try to help them by asking them for the reason they're depressed, they either tell there's no reason or tell me that I'm not a physcratist so stop asking. Are you guys depressed for absolutely no reason or do you have something that makes you depressed? Please keep in mind that it's not some kind of insult and I'm just curious 

Sometimes (just like in my case) it's hard to tell the reason because you don't know it yourself.
Read my, Bruce Khansey's and JaberDoe's diologue up above, you may find something there.

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Stellasin
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#629

Posted 28 February 2018 - 07:37 AM

That was interesting. Sadly I have a friend who never visits a doctor and says he's proud to be depressed. No idea how to get him out of it


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#630

Posted 28 February 2018 - 07:49 AM

That was interesting. Sadly I have a friend who never visits a doctor and says he's proud to be depressed. No idea how to get him out of it

 

"Proud to be depressed."

 

Hmmm....

So, he's okay being depressed?





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