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Roommate masterbating

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Irviding
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#1

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:12 AM Edited by Irviding, 09 September 2013 - 03:13 AM.

One of my best friends is at a different school than me and he is having some issues with his roommate this year... i will quote what he put on yahoo answers

 

I'm in college and am currently randomly assigned to a very weird roommate. This kid is very awkward and nerdy, and while I am okay with this, he also masturbates a disturbing amount. Our garbage can is filled with what are clearly his used masturbation tissues and our room is starting to have a weird musk. Outside of this he is a very good roommate and I am not sure how to approach him about this without offending him but this needs to stop!

 

 

please help

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Seattle Cracker
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#2

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:14 AM

This post amuses me.

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Irviding
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#3

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:15 AM

It is 100% serious. Please help him


El_Diablo
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#4

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:16 AM

you can't be afraid of offending people otherwise nothing would ever get done.

 

just suck it up and tell him straight: either jerk off in the shower, get a girlfriend, or stop jerking off in my room.

simple as that.

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Rougarou
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#5

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:19 AM

Why not tell your friend to join in with his roommate? would make it less awkward


Tacymist
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#6

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:19 AM Edited by Tacymist, 09 September 2013 - 03:20 AM.

Tell him you've hidden a small video camera somewhere in the room and it'll film him while he masturbates. Just pray that stuff like that doesn't excite him and make him want to masturbate even more.

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Irviding
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#7

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:20 AM

my friend just told me he woke up the other day and he saw the kid sleeping with a crumbled up tissue

someone help him


Bigs
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#8

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:24 AM

35wbtl.jpg

 

But yeah, you should kindly suggest that he control or at least contain his urges.

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Tacymist
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#9

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:25 AM

Yeah this needs to be stopped. Soon your friend might wake up one morning and notice something in his peripherals, and there it is, a crumpled up tissue right on his pillow next to his head. And then he looks around and sees that he is surrounded by masturbation tissues. Straight out of a horror movie right there.

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HUGOHL
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#10

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:44 AM

Make your friend tell him that he's gonna kill all the sensitivity in his mushroom tip, or some other crap like "masturbation kills you" or "god hates masturbation".

He could also offer himself for a handjob and scare the kid. But if the creepy dude is gay, your friend is pretty much f*cked up.


theonlytobyever
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#11

Posted 09 September 2013 - 03:56 AM

Tell him that his constant jerking is going to make him blind.

Seriously, he just needs to be honest with him or live with Jerky McJerkoff.

Harley
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#12

Posted 09 September 2013 - 04:09 AM

just suck it up 

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stu
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#13

Posted 09 September 2013 - 04:12 AM

This needs to be stopped. You give someone an inch and they'll take it a mile, in other words, unless your friend wants to be awoken each day by a cumshot up the nose from this little freak, then he needs to confront him straight away.

 

No man should have to inhabit a place that is filled with the stench of another man's semen, it ain't right.  

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TEoS
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#14

Posted 09 September 2013 - 04:12 AM

Your friend should start his own spunk garbage can and make sure his musk is the more dominant. If his musk is beta then he's just gonna need to deal with it.

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Tacymist
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#15

Posted 09 September 2013 - 04:15 AM

He needs to be upfront with him. Tell your friend to quit jerking around and have him tell his roommate to quit jerking around also. The time has come, no more beating around the bush. This madness must end.


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#16

Posted 09 September 2013 - 04:22 AM

I think your friend's just pissed because his roomate uses all the TPs and doesn't leave enough TP for him to masturbate and wipe.


darthYENIK
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#17

Posted 09 September 2013 - 04:29 AM

I'm guessing he's new to college.  Tell him to man the f*ck up and confront him.  It's just jerking off.  A big part of the college years is growing up.  Shaking those high school bullsh*t tendencies, like being awkward when talking about sex, masturbation and adult subjects.  

 

And this roommate needs to throw his f*cking trash out more often.

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Oddsock
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#18

Posted 09 September 2013 - 05:42 AM

I don't get it with all the unhelpful, wanna-be-funny comments.

 

Anyway, the thing to do is just confront him. That kind of situation demands tact, but anything less than direct communication is unworkable here. Best words I can come up with on the top of my head are, "Hey man, you masturbate, I masturbate, that's all fine and good, but the tissues and stuff you leave around are making this place feel unclean. I'm asking you nicely, as a friend who wants to work with you on this, to either cut back your habits, or let's work on how we can better this situation in another way."


Shyabang Shyabang
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#19

Posted 09 September 2013 - 05:47 AM Edited by Shyabang Shyabang, 09 September 2013 - 05:49 AM.

Maybe your friend did something that made his roommate want to do that, such as changing clothes on front of him or walk out the bathroom naked after a shower/bath. I changed while my roommate was in the same room. I didn't think it would be a big deal because we're the same gender. After I changed, my roommate went in the bathroom. About 15 minutes later, I heard a "yeah! Oh yeah!" from the bathroom. It was a strong whisper that was loud enough for me to hear. It was very creepy and yet somewhat flattering.

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Waddy
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#20

Posted 09 September 2013 - 07:02 AM

Hahaha Great topic.

 

I would just tell him? Whats the big deal? Tell him to stop because the smell is off putting. Simple as.

 

Or show him this thread.


El_Diablo
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#21

Posted 09 September 2013 - 07:11 AM

I don't get it with all the unhelpful, wanna-be-funny comments.

 

really?

 

welcome to the internet. you must be new here.

enjoy your stay :turn:

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ryuclan
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#22

Posted 09 September 2013 - 12:25 PM

Just tell him to reserve masturbation to the bathroom. The smell is offputting and the tissues are unsanitary.

SlappyPwnsAss
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#23

Posted 09 September 2013 - 12:35 PM

Tell him to f*ck off. Or masturbate somewhere else.


F4L?
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#24

Posted 09 September 2013 - 12:46 PM

 

just suck it up 

 

I second this.


orbitalraindrops
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#25

Posted 09 September 2013 - 01:20 PM

Masturbate onto all of his prized possessions and clothes and see if he gets the hint.

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DeeperRed
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#26

Posted 09 September 2013 - 01:27 PM

Get the kid laid. 


Canoxa
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#27

Posted 09 September 2013 - 01:32 PM

Riiight... Your friend.


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#28

Posted 09 September 2013 - 01:43 PM

I don't get it with all the unhelpful, wanna-be-funny comments.

Welcome to 95% of Gta Forums...

 

Like somebody else said, if you're afraid of offending people, then nothing will get done. I can't see why he would get offended, he's obviously going too far and making the place smell like sh*t. If he's doing it to satisfy his needs, he needs a girlfriend or an alternative of some sorts; if he's doing it because he's bored, get him to go out more or something.


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#29

Posted 09 September 2013 - 01:44 PM

Tell them to have a bonding session and jerk each other off.


TECHN9CiAN
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#30

Posted 09 September 2013 - 01:59 PM

Ignore all these weak passive-aggressive ways, just tell him toughen up and tell him to quit jerking off outside the bathroom or he will f*ck him up/ report him for sexual harrassment, whatever scares him more. If hes a nerdy kid who made it to college without committing suicide, i doubt violence scares him anymore...




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