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let's hear your bank heist lines

216 replies to this topic
Feurian42
  • Feurian42

    GTA WORLD POLICE

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#151

Posted 04 September 2013 - 12:25 PM

"Grab your balls and hug the walls, this is a stick up", "Get down and put your hands on your head....I SAID DOWN....NOW! A$$HOLES AND ELBOWS PEOPLE, A$$HOLES AND ELBOWS, The first one of you to show me your face gets reconstructive surgery"

Malndor
  • Malndor

    !?

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#152

Posted 04 September 2013 - 12:25 PM

I'm going to add to that. Read the post of the guy speaking about tone and making jokes after, I loved it so going to add this to my comments.

Run in there;

"BATHROOM!"

Cashier - Please don't hurt me

"WHAT"

Cashier - Starts to put money into a bag

"BATHROOM MAN, WHERE IS IT!!"

Cashier - Oh my god! (people screaming)

"GOD DAMNIT MAN THIS IS A NUMBER TWO EMERGENCY!"

*Alarms going off, people screaming, chaos ensues, sirens heard in the distance*

rockstar86
  • rockstar86

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#153

Posted 04 September 2013 - 12:32 PM

GET THE f*ck ON THE GROUND BEFORE I MAKE MINCED MEAT OUTTA YOUR ASSES!!!!

relinquish
  • relinquish

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#154

Posted 04 September 2013 - 12:39 PM

*opens the door*
GET ON THE FLOOR!
EVERYBODY WALK THE DINOSAUR!
.
.
.
.
.
.
suicidal.gif yeah.....

BoloYeung
  • BoloYeung

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#155

Posted 04 September 2013 - 12:48 PM

This right here -


MasterO
  • MasterO

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#156

Posted 04 September 2013 - 12:52 PM

Hello madam, I'd like to make a withdrawal please.

AtomicPunk
  • AtomicPunk

    I'm your huckleberry

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#157

Posted 04 September 2013 - 01:01 PM Edited by AtomicPunk, 04 September 2013 - 01:11 PM.

Raise your hands in the air
and if you wave them like you just don't care
I WILL FU*KING KILL YOU!!
NOW GET THAT MONEY INTO THE BAG!!

(TELLER:) But how can I get the money
into the bag with my hands raised in the air, sir?

BANG!!!

The next sonofabeech who wants to get smart
I WILL have you bend over
and I WILL shoot you
right in the a**hole!!
ARE WE CLEAR????


And don't try and get smart
and throw a paint-pack in the bag!
I will come back here and paint the walls
with your fu*king souls
if a paint-pack goes off in my bag
I like my bag


Have a good day
I.SAID.GOOD.DAY! mad.gif smile.gif

bluetops
  • bluetops

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#158

Posted 04 September 2013 - 01:08 PM

People, be cool. This is just a robbery. Do not worry. We are not stealing your money. Your money is insured by the insurance agency. We are here for the bank's money.

You're all in safe hands. sly.gif

eee333
  • eee333

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#159

Posted 04 September 2013 - 01:26 PM

I love rainbows and long walks on the beach.

Did you ever stop and enjoy the moment!

WILL YOU MARRY ME!

... I get emertion and all that stuff, but this is not for me. since probably the AI is not programmed to understand what I'm saying I may use this thing once and then never again.

DualDrive
  • DualDrive

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#160

Posted 04 September 2013 - 01:32 PM Edited by DualDrive, 04 September 2013 - 01:35 PM.

THIS

nickmajfc
  • nickmajfc

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#161

Posted 04 September 2013 - 01:42 PM

"Why did i move here? I guess it was the motherfu**ing money!, now give me the damn cash!"

Gotta bring back the 2011 memories.. wow that was a long time ago!

nikobitch
  • nikobitch

    The most handsome mafakah!

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#162

Posted 04 September 2013 - 01:43 PM

Hey there.. Erm I don't know but this hard to say really..Erm can I have the money please... I said please MOTHERf*ckERRRRRRRRRR *guns blazing all over the place hits one person in the knee*
Please smile.gif

Ryder_from_the_grave
  • Ryder_from_the_grave

    Land of the Heartless

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#163

Posted 04 September 2013 - 01:52 PM

"money bags feelin hungry here!feed it before i feed you bullets for breakfast,(jesse pinkman voice)B*TCH"

UltimateVenom
  • UltimateVenom

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#164

Posted 04 September 2013 - 01:56 PM

Whispering: "If my wife wakes up, I'll blow your head off"

behe
  • behe

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#165

Posted 04 September 2013 - 02:06 PM

me: put the money in the bag and everything here is gonna be ok!

bank accountant: and if i dont?

me: clip loaded, hammer back and ready to fire, i pause for a moment before BOOM!!! (HEADSHOT) ,Jobs a gogogo WERE GOING LOUD!!!!

running sh*t keeping it locked...

The Doctor.
  • The Doctor.

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#166

Posted 04 September 2013 - 02:10 PM

*white noise* = instanmoney ?

Or does i recognize on actuall words like "MONEY NOW BITCH". If not im gonna go with White Noise.

DaRkL3AD3R
  • DaRkL3AD3R

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#167

Posted 04 September 2013 - 02:11 PM

QUOTE (Chukkles @ Tuesday, Sep 3 2013, 20:22)
Apparently they respond to voice tone.

So I'll be the one aggressively shouting passive things at them like:
Give me some ice cream and I'll give you a dollar.
I'll rub your back because you work hard.
I'm going to the shop, for toilet roll.

And they'll be like; here take my money, don't kill me.

HAHAHAHA LOL

Living up to your assumed name and profession there, Chuckles. You made me crack up nice and early in the morning here! ROFL good sh*t!

My lines would be like:

"Come on pal, I'm making a withdrawal!"
"Everybody get on the floor now! Hands up, heads down!"

Bacala
  • Bacala

    ^me and monday morning^

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#168

Posted 05 September 2013 - 12:53 AM

"gimme the money" just like Jimmy Smash

Maxios
  • Maxios

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#169

Posted 05 September 2013 - 01:09 AM Edited by Maxios, 05 September 2013 - 01:15 AM.

"Greetings, [female dogs]! [Kindly] give me all of the money before I make your [lovely] lives [more interesting!]"

ugotsmoked
  • ugotsmoked

    I DON'T GIVE A F*CK WHAT YOU THINK.

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#170

Posted 05 September 2013 - 01:10 AM

Hold up your brains or Ill blow your hands off!

Costar
  • Costar

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#171

Posted 05 September 2013 - 01:53 AM

I think I'd tell them how bad the economy really is, trying to survive off of thrown-out beans and weenies, getting a bath & doing laundry at the automatic car wash and to top it off, cant get "it" up so .. That should get the money pouring into bags
lol.gif lol.gif lol.gif

beatthedevil56
  • beatthedevil56

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#172

Posted 05 September 2013 - 02:31 AM

All you care about is money. This city deserves a better class of criminal. And I'm gonna give it to them!

SlappyPwnsAss
  • SlappyPwnsAss

    I done kept it real from tha jump

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#173

Posted 05 September 2013 - 02:33 AM

''GIMME YOUR MONEY OR WILL RAPE YOU AND YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY!''


Thats gonna scare them.

Earthless
  • Earthless

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#174

Posted 05 September 2013 - 02:36 AM

FUNNY HOW?!

TheAdmiester
  • TheAdmiester

    Saywha'?

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#175

Posted 05 September 2013 - 02:38 AM

I want to just run into the shop screaming "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAOAOOOOAO" non stop, from entry to exit.

Landotel
  • Landotel

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#176

Posted 05 September 2013 - 02:41 AM

FIB - Don't f*cking MOVE!

FIB - DON'T MOVE OR ELSE I'LL PUT A HEAD UP YOUR ASS!

Michael - *Shoots Everyone*

Niko Bellic - YELLOW CAR!

The_Regulator
  • The_Regulator

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#177

Posted 05 September 2013 - 02:43 AM Edited by GrungeRockCity, 05 September 2013 - 02:54 AM.

"I'll rip off your head and sh*t down your neck! Stack those f*cking Benjies!"
"Everything in the goddamn register! RIGHT NOW!"
"If you even tell your f*cking priest about this, God himself won't save you from my wrath! YOU HEAR ME?!"
"It's a very simple solution, to a very poignant problem. Put the money in the bag, and the fine patrons of your humble establishment won't get bagged."
"Common sense is a virtue. USE IT!"
"Trip the alarm, and I'll kill every motherf*cker in this place!"

Earthless
  • Earthless

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#178

Posted 05 September 2013 - 02:44 AM

QUOTE (Landotel @ Thursday, Sep 5 2013, 02:41)
FIB - Don't f*cking MOVE!

FIB - DON'T MOVE OR ELSE I'LL PUT A HEAD UP YOUR ASS!

Michael - *Shoots Everyone*

Niko Bellic - YELLOW CAR!

And then Niko Bellic receives a text

Roman - hi niko, its roman, lets go bowling

gzam1312
  • gzam1312

    Mark Chump

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#179

Posted 05 September 2013 - 03:05 AM

"Because he's my butler"

3Hunt.
  • 3Hunt.

    Yeah.

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#180

Posted 05 September 2013 - 03:07 AM

"Don't f*ck wid dis nigga, okay? Nigga, I'm frum Compton... Tck..."




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