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Why am I sh*tting my pants?

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Elesdee95
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#1

Posted 11 June 2013 - 07:45 PM

Well the title sums it all, I'm basically full of adrenaline without even fighting at all. I'll give two examples. First, I was hanging in the neighborhood with a classmate and eventually he got in an arguing with a bigger guy that led to a punch applied to my classmate, I tried to get between them and chill them out but a furious look of that big guy made me sh*t my pants. Then my classmate got chased, he wasn't caught and the big guy started screaming and sh*t. So I was literally scared like a little 5 years old girl without even getting a punch of a push.
Second, few days ago I argued with an ex-gf over SMS that led to an insult said by her towards me and then she insulted my mother so I told her when I'll catch, we'll talk more serious things than this. So she called me outside but I was already full of adrenaline and I was like I've been fighting with 100 guys already. So I don't know why the hell my body reacts like this, or my brain does this. I am a quiet guy, I don't get into fights and sh*t at all. How am I supposed to calm myself and stop being so frightened?

Oh and even fights that don't involve me scared me since I was a kid.

Notorious Big
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#2

Posted 11 June 2013 - 07:48 PM Edited by Notorious Big, 11 June 2013 - 08:02 PM.

I use to be the same way till a f*ckin white dude called my dad a ni**er.... We don't play that sh*t... Ever since then I have been no longer my quiet self I took notice to all the small things that happen in life, don't be like me.. I'm like a stick of TNT waiting to explode every day..

rhyn
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#3

Posted 11 June 2013 - 07:58 PM

Learn to fight, go to a kickboxing class or a jiu jitsu class and you'll get used to fighting and will stay calm in those situations from now on.

cbiscuit93
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#4

Posted 11 June 2013 - 07:59 PM

QUOTE (Elesdee95 @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 19:45)
Well the title sums it all, I'm basically full of adrenaline without even fighting at all. I'll give two examples. First, I was hanging in the neighborhood with a classmate and eventually he got in an arguing with a bigger guy that led to a punch applied to my classmate, I tried to get between them and chill them out but a furious look of that big guy made me sh*t my pants. Then my classmate got chased, he wasn't caught and the big guy started screaming and sh*t. So I was literally scared like a little 5 years old girl without even getting a punch of a push.
Second, few days ago I argued with an ex-gf over SMS that led to an insult said by her towards me and then she insulted my mother so I told her when I'll catch, we'll talk more serious things than this. So she called me outside but I was already full of adrenaline and I was like I've been fighting with 100 guys already. So I don't know why the hell my body reacts like this, or my brain does this. I am a quiet guy, I don't get into fights and sh*t at all. How am I supposed to calm myself and stop being so frightened?

Oh and even fights that don't involve me scared me since I was a kid.

What your experiencing is completely normal.
Fights are dumb. Nobody should ever lay there hands on you and you shouldn't lay your hands on anyone else.
If a situation starts getting out of hand just step back a little bit and observe what's going on with a clear head. If you get all worked up and continue the altercation, only bad things are going to happen. That's why it's smarter to take a breath, try to detach yourself emotionally, and decide the smartest course of action.
Of course there will be people who can't handle themselves that way and scream, flip out, fight and all that stuff. To those people I say, you look very dumb.

But if something real serious happens where a friend of yours is in immediate danger, or if someone sets up on you, you gotta' just go wild then & start beatin' sh*t up. Pain is temporary. The rift created when a friend lets another friend get beat up is pretty permanent.

There were these two kids who I knew - They were sitting in a car when some people came up and started fighting with one of them, so he got out of the car and wound up getting jumped while the other kid just stayed in the car & watched. It's safe to say that the kid who stayed in the car now has no friends and people call him a bitch every time they see him.

You just gotta' pick & choose your battles wisely.

GunWrath
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#5

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:01 PM

Everyone is different, some aren't actually as scared as they think, it's just the thought of violence that sends a shock through your body.

Fighting doesn't solve anything anyways, it's better to just walk away. When sh*t hits the fan, you'll either 1. get your ass kicked and resume living life or 2. react and kick their ass or 3. be the bigger man and walk away, but because they're big men (the guy that made you sh*t your pants) don't necessarily mean they are unstoppable.

As far as notorious, so it's okay for the guy to call your pops a racist word and you get pissed but how does calling him a 'honky' exactly help your cause? Stick of TNT, how old are you?

Notorious Big
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#6

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:01 PM

See the thing is if you have alot of friends you don't need to learn to fight.. But bro PM me if you want tips or help

I'm old enough... wink.gif

cbiscuit93
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#7

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:03 PM

I wouldn't listen to Notorious if I were you.
Just sayin'.

Notorious Big
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#8

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:05 PM

Whats wrong with my advice?

Secura
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#9

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:07 PM

I used to be fairly into Judo, its holds and throws prevent teach you to want your opponent to strike you that you can then take advantage of their attack.

However, I say Judo or any martial art really would be beneficial for you to learn. Not just for self defense purposes but also to learn the martial way, it teaches you to be fearless, respectful and kind to others. In short it's perfect for a kid in your situation, so go ahead ask your parents to take you to martial arts classes and trust me, you won't ever regret it.

cbiscuit93
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#10

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:08 PM

Well, stick of TNT, it seems that your style of handling things is to fight everyone that crosses your path.
And you said if you have a lot of friends you don't need to learn to fight?? Why? Because you can just let them fight for you? That's not very cool...

Just doesn't sound like good advice to me.

Elesdee95
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#11

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:09 PM Edited by Elesdee95, 11 June 2013 - 08:12 PM.

QUOTE (rhyn @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 19:58)
Learn to fight, go to a kickboxing class or a jiu jitsu class and you'll get used to fighting and will stay calm in those situations from now on.

Unfortunately we don't have these kind of classes in our city. My cousin knows many notorious, bad guys in the neighborhood and city in general and if it's something really bad going on she'll talk to somebody and do something, probably. But that's lame when you're calling your cousin to help you. Her reputation also helped me in the first months of highschool when everybody was trying to show they're not afraid of fighting.

I haven't been involved into a fighting since fifth grade and that means it's almost six or seven years since then. I don't really look for trouble but I can't let people talk sh*t of my parents especially when I never do that.

BGModder
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#12

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:10 PM

Are you in Lebanon bro? Just join Hezbollah.

cbiscuit93
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#13

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:10 PM

QUOTE (BGModder @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 20:10)
Are you in Lebanon bro? Just join Hezbollah.

icon13.gif suicidal.gif

Triple Vacuum Seal
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#14

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:22 PM Edited by canttakemyid, 11 June 2013 - 08:24 PM.

Have a few of beers if you want to appear calm before an altercation.

If you're really trying win a though, you should feed off of that adrenaline. You just have to learn how to channel it. Shaking is fine, but being jumpy and lacking control isn't. When that starts to happened, just remember to breathe. People usually don't even realize that they have stopped breathing properly because the adrenaline distracts them. It takes practice. That's where training comes in. Roll BJJ and do some Muay Thai. They teach you breathing until it becomes involuntary to properly do so. I would recommend the self defense-oriented stuff from both arts. The competition stuff will get you owned if you aren't experienced.

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#15

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:29 PM

Keep it that way and dont get involved in fights with bigger guys than you , even if you manage to beat them up , you'll get paranoid about them coming for you for revenge or stuff like that ... thats my opinion .

Triple Vacuum Seal
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#16

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:38 PM

QUOTE (Fable11 @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 15:29)
Keep it that way and dont get involved in fights with bigger guys than you , even if you manage to beat them up , you'll get paranoid about them coming for you for revenge or stuff like that ... thats my opinion .

and getting arrested.

Avoidance is in fact the self-defense tactic IMO. The forces of society are against you so it's not worth it solely for that reason. I do think our society has gotten unhealthily scared of fighting as Fight Club best put it by saying, "We are a generation of men raised by women"; but that's another argument. We should all be taught some sort of martial arts coming up. Most martial arts promote peace as it's usually the untrained fighter who instigates these days.

Max
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#17

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:39 PM

QUOTE (Elesdee95 @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 19:45)
led to a punch applied to my classmate

Wonderful turn of phrase.

GunWrath
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#18

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:49 PM

QUOTE (Notorious Big @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 15:01)
See the thing is if you have alot of friends you don't need to learn to fight.. But bro PM me if you want tips or help

I'm old enough... wink.gif

Lol .. internet gangster, watch out.

Thamuz
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#19

Posted 11 June 2013 - 08:57 PM

QUOTE (BGModder @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 20:10)
Are you in Lebanon bro? Just join Hezbollah.

Haha biggrin.gif icon14.gif

universetwisters
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#20

Posted 11 June 2013 - 09:05 PM

I get pumped a lot. Just yesterday, I saw a recent picture of my ex's boyfriend who pulled a knife on me, and I almost put my fist through the computer. My best advice would be just to take a deep breath and watch something funny, do something funny. Basically, anything funny will most always take your mind off whatever's making you pumped.

DarthShinobi
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#21

Posted 11 June 2013 - 09:23 PM

It's not even worth fighting unless you're defending your girl or if a younger dude is f*cking with your parents or younger family members. If its one on one let your friend handle himself. Other than that you have no reason to fight, it's not worth getting brain injuries for a moment of "machoness"

cbiscuit93
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#22

Posted 11 June 2013 - 09:32 PM

QUOTE (Thamuz @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 20:57)
QUOTE (BGModder @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 20:10)
Are you in Lebanon bro? Just join Hezbollah.

Haha biggrin.gif icon14.gif

bored.gif

Elesdee95
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#23

Posted 11 June 2013 - 09:33 PM

Well I'll tell ya. People will think you are a pussy if you don't fight, then they'll eventually start pissing you off more or even get bullied.

DarthShinobi
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#24

Posted 11 June 2013 - 09:40 PM

QUOTE (Elesdee95 @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 21:33)
Well I'll tell ya. People will think you are a pussy if you don't fight, then they'll eventually start pissing you off more or even get bullied.

I'm guessing you're still in school?

Elesdee95
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#25

Posted 11 June 2013 - 09:47 PM

Highschool but never had problems there.

DarthShinobi
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#26

Posted 11 June 2013 - 09:54 PM

QUOTE (Elesdee95 @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 21:47)
Highschool but never had problems there.

Man, you have to be worried about more important sh*t in high school instead of fighting.

Elesdee95
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#27

Posted 11 June 2013 - 09:57 PM

QUOTE (Erebos @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 21:54)
QUOTE (Elesdee95 @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 21:47)
Highschool but never had problems there.

Man, you have to be worried about more important sh*t in high school instead of fighting.

Like?

DarthShinobi
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#28

Posted 11 June 2013 - 10:01 PM

QUOTE (Elesdee95 @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 21:57)
QUOTE (Erebos @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 21:54)
QUOTE (Elesdee95 @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 21:47)
Highschool but never had problems there.

Man, you have to be worried about more important sh*t in high school instead of fighting.

Like?

Maybe you should drop out because the fact that you don't know what concerns me.

GreatGig
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#29

Posted 11 June 2013 - 10:09 PM

QUOTE (rhyn @ Tuesday, Jun 11 2013, 20:58)
Learn to fight, go to a kickboxing class or a jiu jitsu class and you'll get used to fighting and will stay calm in those situations from now on.

This is pretty sound advice.

I used to be the same, still am a little bit, but knowing that you have the knowledge and capacity to defend yourself gives you confidence. I did Tae Kwon Do for about 4-5 years and it's without a doubt one of the best things I've learned. Not only does it help in the aforementioned areas, but doing it regularly enough helps keep you fit. Another bonus is that it can help your mind, too (apologies for getting all hippie up in here).

Still, as some have already mentioned, getting into fights is pretty pointless anyway, but it's not always possible to simply walk away so it's a good idea to be prepared for a situation like that.

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#30

Posted 11 June 2013 - 11:04 PM

Join a boxing gym if there's one in your city. Or better yet join the boxing team if your school has one. I boxed for 3 years while I was in the military, and not only did it help me to learn to defend myself properly, but it helped me to avoid getting into altercations entirely. Confidence is huge. When you know you can defend yourself you stop feeling like you have something to prove when someone threatens you. That being said, you can still look like a good man in the event that someone persists to try and get into a fight with you if you continually try to reason with him until he throws a punch. Boxing is great because it teaches you so much about the mechanics of punching that you can easily take advantage of the fact that the majority of people swing like gorillas. Even if someones much bigger than you, if you can duck the initial swing, identify the opening and seize the opportunity, you can put him down clean and easy. Or if you're the quick type, look into counter-punching.




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