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Recently Turned Eighteen...

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DP Man
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#1

Posted 06 May 2013 - 10:29 AM

I recently turned 18 a week or two ago and I feel like I'm so behind compared to everyone else my age and even younger, It's starting to make me feel sh*t.

Everyone else my age has a job, money, self esteem, social skills, muscle, nice hair, their license, a huge group of friends, a girlfriend and goes out living their life. I see these kinds of people out in public and on Facebook, Instagram etc and it makes me feel sh*t because they've accomplished more than me even before they were 18.

Most of the time I feel awkward and inferior to everyone when I go out in public and I hate but it feels impossible to change. I want to to join a gym so I can get bigger, look better and feel less inferior. Need a job for that. I want to get my first job so I can actually have money to use on my way to improve. No one hires a lot, I haven't had a proper job and most places feel weird about hiring 18 year olds. I want to be more social and outgoing. Everyone has huge friend groups and I fear rejection far too much to say "hey". Same goes to dating.

What should I do? I'm sick of living like this.

Please have some respect and be serious.

Raavi
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#2

Posted 06 May 2013 - 10:42 AM Edited by Raavi, 06 May 2013 - 10:45 AM.

Seems kind of ironic you come here asking that on an internet forum. Anyway, the best thing to do is not thinking about doing something positive and productive with your life. But actually effectively doing it. If you can't handle it at 18, I fear for the rest of your adult life.

Oh and I know this sounds somewhat clich but: Don't let others get you down. Staying down is the easy non-satisfying route, getting back up is prove of character.

Joe Chip
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#3

Posted 06 May 2013 - 10:47 AM

To get a job you actually have to go out and apply for one; you rationalizing why you're not getting one isn't helping you in any way, and they don't really give a sh*t about you after you leave if they turn you down, so there's no excuse to not apply.

Same (sort of) goes for friends. You'd be surprised how little people actually care about other people. I'm not exactly in a position to be giving advice on friends, but maybe you'll at least realize there's no reason other people would give a sh*t about you for more than thirty minutes.

And you can pretty easily work out from home without equipment; it's better than doing nothing until you get a gym membership.

F4L?
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#4

Posted 06 May 2013 - 11:03 AM

You're in Australia, just go out and have a few beers with someone you know, talk to anyone you know on Facebook, see if they're going to the pub/club and go with them. Only way you're going to get out, is to go out,

Getting a job is easy as piss, Pretty sick of people bitching about no jobs, you just need to grow a set and go out and get one.

ForretressLover
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#5

Posted 06 May 2013 - 11:04 AM

Have you had sex yet?

Lochie
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#6

Posted 06 May 2013 - 11:04 AM

Here are some websites you should visit;

How to Write a Resume
Nerd Fitness - Bodyweight Workouts

Once you write a resume print it out and head into your town and hand it into a few stores, you will have to talk to strangers and you will need to make small talk with them. When I was 18 I was working a full-time office job, don't sell yourself short just because you're young. It sounds like you've got a low self-esteem and some anxiety. As zoo said don't let other people get you down and if you want people to like you, you have to like yourself first.

As for your looks; look at Nerd Fitness to get a few ideas of what you can do without gym equipment, then just go for it. If you're worried about how your hair looks, I advise that you find a photo of a hairstyle you like, print it out and take it to the barber and get your hair cut like that.

Honestly only you can make your life better and if you're always down on yourself, figure out what you don't like about yourself and change it, don't let it build up inside of you and start feeling helpless.

PS. If you need help with your resume send me a PM.

Secura
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#7

Posted 06 May 2013 - 11:09 AM

These threads are popping up far, far too often.

Welcome to GTAForums, you come for GTA and you stay for advice on life.

ExtremoMania
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#8

Posted 06 May 2013 - 11:09 AM

QUOTE (ForretressLover @ Monday, May 6 2013, 19:04)
Have you had sex yet?

What a senseless question. mercie_blink.gif
He's talking about jobs and your asking if he had ever gone sex.

Linc.
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#9

Posted 06 May 2013 - 11:12 AM

QUOTE (ExtremeLimitations @ Monday, May 6 2013, 21:09)
QUOTE (ForretressLover @ Monday, May 6 2013, 19:04)
Have you had sex yet?

What a senseless question. mercie_blink.gif
He's talking about jobs and your asking if he had ever gone sex.

The threads more than just about having a job. smile.gif

QUOTE (DP Man)
Everyone else my age has a job, money, self esteem, social skills, muscle, nice hair, their license, a huge group of friends, a girlfriend and goes out living their life.

F4L?
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#10

Posted 06 May 2013 - 11:20 AM

I don't mean to be rude DP man, but the ONLY possible way to get out there is to stop being a pussy, can you think of any other way to get out? Nope, there is none. I remember when my friends started partying and I was scared to go and do it, well f*ck it, I did it anyway, best decision I ever made, your confidence grows quickly boy.

None of us started with muscles, a job, a girlfriend or self-esteem, and everyone has a fear of rejection, you just have to man up and overcome it, you don't need to go to the gym to build muscles, you need to eat lots of food, and there are many exercises you can do without weights and build muscle, you just need to work hard at it, here's a simple one down the bottom.



Also read this topic, it will give you the answer you need in Case I wasn't clear enough, call me a dick and Melchior a dick, but it's the truth...

http://www.gtaforums...opic=551304&hl=




The Odyssey
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#11

Posted 06 May 2013 - 11:38 AM

QUOTE (ForretressLover @ Monday, May 6 2013, 11:04)
Have you had sex yet?

Why do all of your posts have to do with sex?

DP Man
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#12

Posted 06 May 2013 - 12:01 PM

QUOTE
Seems kind of ironic you come here asking that on an internet forum. Anyway, the best thing to do is not thinking about doing something positive and productive with your life. But actually effectively doing it. If you can't handle it at 18, I fear for the rest of your adult life.

Oh and I know this sounds somewhat clich but: Don't let others get you down. Staying down is the easy non-satisfying route, getting back up is prove of character.


Had nowhere else to turn to sad.gif I'll remember that!

QUOTE
To get a job you actually have to go out and apply for one; you rationalizing why you're not getting one isn't helping you in any way, and they don't really give a sh*t about you after you leave if they turn you down, so there's no excuse to not apply.

Same (sort of) goes for friends. You'd be surprised how little people actually care about other people. I'm not exactly in a position to be giving advice on friends, but maybe you'll at least realize there's no reason other people would give a sh*t about you for more than thirty minutes.

And you can pretty easily work out from home without equipment; it's better than doing nothing until you get a gym membership.


I have been applying but whenever I go into a store I don't get a callback or they say they're not hiring.

No money to use on home equipment sadly.

QUOTE
You're in Australia, just go out and have a few beers with someone you know, talk to anyone you know on Facebook, see if they're going to the pub/club and go with them. Only way you're going to get out, is to go out,

Getting a job is easy as piss, Pretty sick of people bitching about no jobs, you just need to grow a set and go out and get one.


That's a problem, I have no friends that aren't awkward.

Any tips for getting a job if I've never had one before?

QUOTE
Have you had sex yet?


No, why?

QUOTE
Here are some websites you should visit;

How to Write a Resume
Nerd Fitness - Bodyweight Workouts

Once you write a resume print it out and head into your town and hand it into a few stores, you will have to talk to strangers and you will need to make small talk with them. When I was 18 I was working a full-time office job, don't sell yourself short just because you're young. It sounds like you've got a low self-esteem and some anxiety. As zoo said don't let other people get you down and if you want people to like you, you have to like yourself first.

As for your looks; look at Nerd Fitness to get a few ideas of what you can do without gym equipment, then just go for it. If you're worried about how your hair looks, I advise that you find a photo of a hairstyle you like, print it out and take it to the barber and get your hair cut like that.

Honestly only you can make your life better and if you're always down on yourself, figure out what you don't like about yourself and change it, don't let it build up inside of you and start feeling helpless.

PS. If you need help with your resume send me a PM.


Thanks for those links, I'll send you a PM when I've re-written my resume! As for my hair, I might go get a haircut to feel better about myself tomorrow smile.gif

QUOTE
I don't mean to be rude DP man, but the ONLY possible way to get out there is to stop being a pussy, can you think of any other way to get out? Nope, there is none. I remember when my friends started partying and I was scared to go and do it, well f*ck it, I did it anyway, best decision I ever made, your confidence grows quickly boy.

None of us started with muscles, a job, a girlfriend or self-esteem, and everyone has a fear of rejection, you just have to man up and overcome it, you don't need to go to the gym to build muscles, you need to eat lots of food, and there are many exercises you can do without weights and build muscle, you just need to work hard at it, here's a simple one down the bottom.



Also read this topic, it will give you the answer you need in Case I wasn't clear enough, call me a dick and Melchior a dick, but it's the truth...

http://www.gtaforums...opic=551304&hl=


No no, it's not rude at all. I know I'm a pussy, it's so hard to change when you've been like it all your life sadly. I've been to one night club already, but I felt so f*cking awkward there. Any advice?

Thanks for the video! Interesting thread you linked actually.


F4L?
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#13

Posted 06 May 2013 - 12:04 PM

You went to a Night Club? Who with? Did you drink at all?

Do you know anybody from school? Like even if you were just sort of acquaintances?

DP Man
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#14

Posted 06 May 2013 - 01:10 PM

QUOTE (finn4life @ Monday, May 6 2013, 12:04)
You went to a Night Club? Who with? Did you drink at all?

Do you know anybody from school? Like even if you were just sort of acquaintances?

I went with my sister, best friend and two of her friends, my best friend left early because he wasn't having fun though. I didn't drink by the way.

Don't go to school anymore (graduated) but I don't really have any friends from there that party. Most are awkward and/or dating.

Elesdee95
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#15

Posted 06 May 2013 - 01:18 PM

I think you should gather your group of closest friends and go out if that makes you feel more comfortable. Clubs can also be boring, don't worry, if you are still feeling awkward, keep going out more and more, you'll see this gone by the time passing, you can't expect to have your confidence/happiness increased overnight.

DP Man
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#16

Posted 06 May 2013 - 01:27 PM

QUOTE (Elesdee95 @ Monday, May 6 2013, 13:18)
I think you should gather your group of closest friends and go out if that makes you feel more comfortable. Clubs can also be boring, don't worry, if you are still feeling awkward, keep going out more and more, you'll see this gone by the time passing, you can't expect to have your confidence/happiness increased overnight.

Literately none of my friends are into the party scene sadly :|

Elesdee95
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#17

Posted 06 May 2013 - 01:32 PM

QUOTE (DP Man @ Monday, May 6 2013, 13:27)
QUOTE (Elesdee95 @ Monday, May 6 2013, 13:18)
I think you should gather your group of closest friends and go out if that makes you feel more comfortable. Clubs can also be boring, don't worry, if you are still feeling awkward, keep going out more and more, you'll see this gone by the time passing, you can't expect to have your confidence/happiness increased overnight.

Literately none of my friends are into the party scene sadly :|

Ah, I know that, just try and push them outside, try to discuss to them on this theme, probably they're struggling just like you. Make them wish to change their lives.

Ari Gold
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#18

Posted 06 May 2013 - 01:32 PM

Are you at uni or TAFE?

Kobalt__
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#19

Posted 06 May 2013 - 02:42 PM

Have you applied at grocery stores? That's the perfect place for a first job, and they're usually always hiring cashiers and baggers.

Workout at home, run, do push ups, sit ups, anything without the use of gym equipment.

Don't worry about what other people think because they don't matter. What matters is what you think of yourself.

Be happy with what you've got, and things will work out.

Keep your chin up, sport.

Rewas514
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#20

Posted 06 May 2013 - 02:48 PM

Oh god. I'll be 18 this Friday. Don't make me feel like sh*t too.

ForretressLover
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#21

Posted 06 May 2013 - 02:49 PM

QUOTE (DP Man @ Monday, May 6 2013, 12:01)

QUOTE
Have you had sex yet?


No, why?

SEX, in this day, age and generation, is very important deciding factor when it comes to being an ALPHA MALE. The more relationships you have, girls you sleep with (even just making out with a girl at a club, aka SCORING, will set your respect meter waaaay up) will make you popular and well known. from this, you go on to have more and more male friends, more going out, more girls to meet... and eventually you start to feel good about yourself, and life will feel good. Sex and friendships are important. Your own problems, depression etc, stays at home. (I constantly play pokemon, but THAT stays at home! thats MY business!) you are young, so GO OUT and BE YOUNG!! go to raging parties, nightclubs with your friends! Pull girls!! Cant give any info on jobs or personal achievments, sorry. Feel good, man. You just got advice from a Forretress.

ForretressLover
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#22

Posted 06 May 2013 - 02:51 PM

Remember; BE GENETICALLY DIFFERENT. Alpha, baby!! Forretress out.

orbitalraindrops
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#23

Posted 06 May 2013 - 02:57 PM

You know what I f*cking despise. How people think that getting big muscles or working out will automatically make you really confident and attractive. If you get big muscles youll think yeah I look good but it wont wipe away all the years of insecurity and abuse. It's like when you see phags who think as soon as they get pussy they'll be happy and well adjusted, and then they do and everything is still the same and sh*t. I was one of them. I used to think that the only thing that mattered was getting girls and getting muscles. True confidence and happienss comes from within. You shouldn't rely on external events to make you happy as externally not everything is going to go your way.

Fnorg
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#24

Posted 06 May 2013 - 04:09 PM

QUOTE (orbitalraindrops @ Monday, May 6 2013, 16:57)
You know what I f*cking despise. How people think that getting big muscles or working out will automatically make you really confident and attractive. If you get big muscles youll think yeah I look good but it wont wipe away all the years of insecurity and abuse. It's like when you see phags who think as soon as they get pussy they'll be happy and well adjusted, and then they do and everything is still the same and sh*t. I was one of them. I used to think that the only thing that mattered was getting girls and getting muscles. True confidence and happienss comes from within. You shouldn't rely on external events to make you happy as externally not everything is going to go your way.

Much of this hits way too close to home. While I agree with most of it (i.e. lifting and poon on the reg probably won't unf*ck a sh*tty attitude towards things), I can say I feel a lot more confident not being a skinny-fat DYEL. Dressing better, having a not retarded haircut and a half-way decent body certainly makes me feel better about myself.

But yeah, all the years spent as a fatty DYEL who dressed in baggy sh*t have definitely left their mark. It's a lot easier to hide when people don't know you've been a weird DYEL fatty, though.

Ari Gold
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#25

Posted 06 May 2013 - 04:21 PM

You stopped being a DYEL phaggot? I must not have received that memo.

Fnorg
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#26

Posted 06 May 2013 - 04:24 PM

ni**er, come on. You've seen my legs. No way in hell you had to ask "does that guy even lift?" Because that is what DYEL-mode implies. Having to question whether or not a certain person lifts. Lurk more, phaggot.

















f*cking manlets, when will they learn?

CallTheCoroner
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#27

Posted 06 May 2013 - 04:26 PM

That's cute, you guys have the same avatar, awww.

Mar
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#28

Posted 06 May 2013 - 04:33 PM

Everyone grows up at different times in their life, and sometimes we all don't grow up the same ways. For instance, a person may be 'grown-up' in the terms of education, but doesn't understand the, for lack of a better term, 'street and practical' skills of life. Although, this may not apply to you if you're all still in High School and contemplating starting college, but realize you're not falling behind.

Age isn't something we should use to judge how one should determine how progressed in their life they are. The envy you're feeling will later result into bitterness, unless you decide to be happy for people for what they accomplished and wait for your turn to experience life. If you continue feeling this way about people your age, then you're going hitting a big probability of never doing anything with you life. Don't hit that downward depression spiral. Get a job, start exercising, or just try something new to change the norm of your life.

Anything, learn a new skill even? Sitting and complaining about it will only make it worse. Also, don't feel bad if it takes you a few more years to enter that stage in your life. You can't force yourself into it, or you're going to feel displaced and unhappy. In my opinion, you need to just try something new and break free of your usual norms. Doing the smallest thing that changes your everyday occurrence will change the way you feel about yourself and see yourself. If it doesn't right away, then keep changing little things here and there from your norm.

Try it, and feel better. Growing up is about trail and error and experiencing change. Give it a shot.

darthYENIK
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#29

Posted 06 May 2013 - 04:34 PM

I was, and still kind of am in the same place as this guy, and I'm 10 years older. So I got most of what this guy is saying he's lacking, but I look at my peers, and they've all got better jobs, they're buying houses, they're married with kids, and so on etc. And even if I had those things, I'd still be wanting something else. There's always something else we want. Some higher peak we want to climb to, I'm sure even the most successful, well adjusted people in this world feel the same way.

ExtremoMania
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#30

Posted 06 May 2013 - 04:54 PM

QUOTE (ForretressLover @ Monday, May 6 2013, 22:49)
QUOTE (DP Man @ Monday, May 6 2013, 12:01)

QUOTE
Have you had sex yet?


No, why?

SEX, in this day, age and generation, is very important deciding factor when it comes to being an ALPHA MALE. The more relationships you have, girls you sleep with (even just making out with a girl at a club, aka SCORING, will set your respect meter waaaay up) will make you popular and well known. from this, you go on to have more and more male friends, more going out, more girls to meet... and eventually you start to feel good about yourself, and life will feel good. Sex and friendships are important. Your own problems, depression etc, stays at home. (I constantly play pokemon, but THAT stays at home! thats MY business!) you are young, so GO OUT and BE YOUNG!! go to raging parties, nightclubs with your friends! Pull girls!! Cant give any info on jobs or personal achievments, sorry. Feel good, man. You just got advice from a Forretress.

There's a troll looming around here. sarcasm.gif
Ignore him dude, he's just a mentally retarded person who doesn't contribute comprehensively and building up arousal for his word.

Hope you survive long enough for saying sex everywhere. icon14.gif




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