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Invisible Machines

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Vercetti21
  • Vercetti21

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#1

Posted 03 March 2012 - 09:05 AM Edited by Vercetti21, 12 April 2012 - 08:08 PM.

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OdDsOcK
  • OdDsOcK

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#2

Posted 03 March 2012 - 05:05 PM

That was cool to read. Thanks for posting it.

If you want any more opinion on it I'd be happy to dole mine out, but I've found that simple appreciation maintains the special feeling behind a poem.

Eminence
  • Eminence

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#3

Posted 07 April 2012 - 10:04 PM

Apologies for replying so late - totally missed this!

I really enjoyed this on first reading. I'm still going over it as we speak, and probably will do a couple times, trying to piece together its meaning. What I wanted to comment on initially was your use of diction; the relations between the word choices and the way they all unfold around a central theme was really striking to me. I quite like the progression it has.

Mokrie Dela
  • Mokrie Dela

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#4

Posted 08 April 2012 - 12:27 PM

I can't add to anything already said other than say I like seeing poetry posted up here. It seems that poetry is often considered "uncool" and to write some can be considered brave.

I like it, and the way it flows, It provokes some thoughts in me of jobs being a chore, like a daily grind (i dont know if that's just on my mind anyway or whether it's my interpretation.) I often find the beauty of poetry is that it can be inturpreted in many ways. I remember I uploaded some here once and people took different things from it.

Nice work there, don't be shy to post more biggrin.gif

Vercetti21
  • Vercetti21

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#5

Posted 11 April 2012 - 03:01 PM

Wow, thanks for all the feedback guys. When I post poetry every once and a blue moon I don't usually anticipate so many comments. I may post more here in the near future, but as I've been crafting together a few poems to ship off to magazines and such today, I may hold off for awhile.

Glad to see the writing community picking up. I need to swing by here more often. tounge.gif

El Zilcho
  • El Zilcho

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#6

Posted 11 April 2012 - 03:23 PM

I remember reading this sometime ago but not having anything constructive to say. So I'll settle with what I wanted to say back then.

I love this peace, it's fantastic.




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