The Mistery Island Mission
Posted 29 January 2012 - 06:51 PM Edited by screenshoter, 05 March 2012 - 06:34 AM.
Recently, I started a new project named "The Mistery Island". It'a about a man that has naufragiated from a ship and reached to an island that no one saw it ever. Here he saw strange things and he had the premontion that someone watches him.
Finally he escapes from the island not very scared. He will search in Los Santos a home to stay because he can't contact his familly from Liberty City. But the curiosity makes Steve to return to the island where will happen terrible things.
After all of this, he contacts the police to report the strangeness. A team led by him will investigate the island. But the malefic entiety won. All of them are seriusly injured and they cand die.
Now, Steve starts to recover. He says words like "Spirit...", "Leave this island!", "Blood...", "Familly...", "Wall...". After 3 monts of hospitalization he wants to finish this hell from The Mistery Island. He called all the militaries, exorcitsx priests and people experts in spirits from the big cities San Andreas and Liberty City. They will need modern equipment to beat this evil demon.
With many injured people Steve's team ended the infern. Steve is back to his town and he will continue his normal life.
But remember! The spirits can return everytime and everywhere!
What do you think?
1. The Mistery Island Part 1 - The Introduction
2. The Mistery Island Part 2 - The Curiosity Hearts
3. The Mistery Island Part 3 - The Police Report
Nah... Not working right now.
The Mistery Island - The Police Report Photos:
1. The Red Buffalo
2. Talking with a Police Man
3. Talking with the Police Boss
1. 29.02.2012 - Added new logo
2. 29.02.2012 - Added updates toolbar
Posted 30 January 2012 - 04:50 AM
Nice introduction. The weather is very suitable for this mission. Nice job.
But, there are something that can be improved:
Firstly, the dialogues. You must put the character's name on them instead of leaving them alone. So, we'll know who was talking. This is very important and can be considering as a main rules. About the typing mistake, it's acceptable.
At the beginning, when we need to jump off the ship, the captain said that we have 2 minutes before the ship explode. But, I just stay there in 3 minutes and nothing happened. You can put a time limit to make it sense and more realistic.
The swimming could be a little more long. Just a little and it'll be better.
When we need to jump off the ship, the captain is still in 'talking animation', but there's no one in front of him. It's something annoying. So, you must create new actor(without animation) to replace the captain.
Otherwise, it's okay and nice.
Hey, you should working on this page. Check out the other missions and see how they arranged their topic. Separate the story, missions, characters, etc.. It'll attracted other users to play.
Btw, good luck.
Posted 30 January 2012 - 06:28 AM
But there are some problems:
1. I don't know how to set the time only for a part of the mission.
2. I didn't put long swiming because I don't wanna' bore you.
3. I know the problem with the captain. But I made this mission at 9:00 PM and I was very tired.
Thank you for your tips, and I'll try to make my missions about to be perfect!
Posted 30 January 2012 - 03:26 PM
Great introduction - I thought it was original and unique, and the weather was very suitable for the setting.
You had an above standard of grammar and punctuation. There were no spelling mistakes, and I liked the use of the word "naufragiated". However, you added some unneccesary periods between letters, like "A G.H.O.S.T!".
I thought the setting of the island was very suitable, although, in my opinion, you should've made the mission contain no pedestrians or cars, because they gave away the feeling of being on a "mystery" island.
I thought the difficulty was very easy, and more than suitable for the introduction.
Also, at the beginning of the mission, as you were about to jump off the boat, the actors were just standing around. You should've changed their animation to jump off the boat, or run around in terror.
All in all, I was very pleased with this mission, and I wish you very well with this series. I will continue to progress feedback to you as you release more missions.
Rating - 8.2/10.
Review by Converse
Posted 30 January 2012 - 03:56 PM
The thing I found amusing was that the only guy who escaped was us and the others where'nt even trying! Try to improve realism and stick more to the theme. When I reached the island I thought that things where gonna get awesome but you just strayed off. I mean, come on! What kind of mysterious island has traffic and peds? You should've have kept only that one guy who gave us shelter. Then it would be more of mysterious. Anyways good job with the missions, awesome gameplay and style! Good job! Waiting for the next missions!
G o o d w o r k a n d g o o d l u c k!
Posted 31 January 2012 - 09:11 AM
Thank you for your mission review. Yeah, I know that it's buggy like the animation of the people from the ship. At the beggining I set their animation to Jump Forward, but the jump once. And about the mistery island, the island is the little part, with the house and the strange objects. Not all the village. And for me, the grade 8 is very good!
Like what I said, the island is the little part of the village. Because if there waren't peds or traffic, people won't see us when we'll be injured (this is another further part of the mission). And I'll try to improve my missions with your tips.
Some days I'll can't improve my missions because I a high school boy, with a lot of homeork and other things. So... you'll have to wait guys... Sorry!
Posted 01 February 2012 - 04:38 AM
Objectives- Adjust Timelimit- Set New Time and choose youer time. To stop the timer, repeat the same process but set the time to 00:00
Posted 01 February 2012 - 06:27 AM Edited by screenshoter, 01 February 2012 - 06:56 AM.
Thank you for telling me how to set the time.
I've created a logo! What do you think?
1.limbo1-460x259 (you'll find the photo if you'll search on Google the words)
2.Red_Blood_Texture_by_JosefineTwilight (you'll find the photo if you'll search on Google the words)
1.Adobe Photoshop CS5
Posted 04 February 2012 - 06:16 PM
Posted 06 February 2012 - 10:02 PM
I think this is kinda unique.
Cuz everyone can make a gangsta story or assassin's story but this....is totally different.
I 'll play your missions tommorow or the day after tommorow when I'm playing other missions to find the MotW (Mission of the Week) for DYOM TV.
And give you feedback.
Good luck with this mission pack
Posted 07 February 2012 - 05:18 AM
OK missions. A Little actionless, but unique.
There wasn't much action. Only like the first mission, seeing the ghost again. Also, when I saw the pick-ups in the second mission, I thought there was going to be some killing action, but there wasn't. So, I'd like to see you add some killing action in the fourth mission, and so on.
The spelling and the punctuation was at standard, but the words were sometimes mixed. You had the right spelling, but the wrong words needed. You used "You'll better not go there" instead of "You better not go there", and so on. There were some spelling mistakes, but I understood all of the dialogues.
The mission length on the first mission was OK, but the second was very short. You could've maybe combined the two together, and transition it somehow.
Also, in one dialogue, one of the sheriff's said "There's a checkpoint to the chief" or something similar. Never expose the checkpoints or anything DYOM-related, as that gives away much realism.
And, in the second mission, you had intro text giving a walkthrough of the mission. Word of advice, never give away a walkthrough! The purpose of the mission is to have fun exploring and predicting what is going to happen next.
You'll notice below that the ratings are low. But, I had no choice. You need to improve realism, that was the main key. And also, add action into the next missions, and you'll aspire into mission ratings of 7-8 out of 10.
Rating - 5.4/10. (Mission 1)
Rating - 4.2/10. (Mission 2)
Review by Converse
Posted 12 February 2012 - 06:41 PM
My good PC is almost gone... Now I can't do any updates to my missions because I'm using my old computer. On this my SA is the laggiest game ever. So... I can only say you that I'm searching solutions. The only solution is that to wait for my mother to go at her job, then to talk with the IT specialist (this will happen tomorow). But then we have to see when this man can repair my PC. I'm so sorry...
I'll give you updates about the work...
Posted 12 February 2012 - 07:55 PM Edited by ThaBoY, 12 February 2012 - 09:22 PM.
|QUOTE (screenshoter @ Sunday, Feb 12 2012, 19:41)|
|† † † † †|
It isn't a good thing to post soo much smileys.
Some people really hate it (but I don't )
Played the 1st missions, here's my feedback
- It's a bit short, but that cuz it's the intro
- The weather fits the theme very well
- But I don't let strangers sleep in my house
- You should add the character's name in the cutscenes
- You should add a time-limit for more realism
- You should replace the talking captain after the cutscene with a new one that's not talking
The Curiosity Hearts
- You should place the cutscene's angel towards the one who says something. I saw the man's animation also when Steve was talking.
- That's why I don't trust old people . They've lot's of guns.
- It was a very short mission with no action.
- You forgot the character's name in the last 2 cutscenes
The Police Report
- You should add some animations in the cutscenes.
- You shouldn't say "There's a checkpoint for you". I don't see checkpoints in real life
- You should place the cutscene's angel towards the one who says something. I only saw the agent's animation, also when Steve was talking.
- Again, there's no action and it's very short.
Overall, it has some things that can be improved but I like the way this is going.
It's a mystery...
So I 'll play the next mission for sure (when your PC is repaired). It isn't bad for a 1st mission pack.
So keep it up, and don't give up - Arejai
Mission 1 6.5/10
Mission 2 5/10
Mission 3 5/10
Posted 13 February 2012 - 07:03 PM
Now I have my PC back. I was only a registry problem. My computer had about 1 million registr errors, so went in a "Melting Down".
Now, because I am happy, I uploaded on YouTube an old video, but I made some improvments.
GTA San Andreas SPECIAL VIDEO
PLEASE READ THE DESCRIPTION
Posted 24 February 2012 - 07:36 PM Edited by screenshoter, 25 February 2012 - 09:32 AM.
Because of my f****n' school, with A LOT of homework and another projects, s***s etc., I don't have time to make progress to my missions. I don't know what happened after the holiday because my teachers are going REALLY CRAZY when giving homework. They give us THOUSANDS of exercises or other. In the first part it wasn't really hard, but now it is.
I'm sorry guys, but you'll stay a very long time without updates...
Posted 25 February 2012 - 12:33 AM Edited by ThaBoY, 25 February 2012 - 12:52 AM.
It isn't necassery to write like that, so don't do it.
It's a'ight to post that.
But next time, don't use size 7 and caps lock in the middle of your text, okay
Posted 01 March 2012 - 08:01 AM Edited by screenshoter, 01 March 2012 - 08:05 AM.
1. I am now a Photoshoper and I made a lot of logos, so I updated my mission's logo.
2. I added an "Updates" toolbar, so this is the last time when I'll post non-special updates.
3. You'll have to read at Updates toolbar if something small will gonna' happen.
P.S: When I'll release my missions, I'll post here. I told you that the Updates toolbar will be for all things.
Posted 08 March 2012 - 09:40 AM Edited by SS Brigade, 08 March 2012 - 10:23 AM.
Posted 03 July 2012 - 05:49 AM
The problem is that I am very busy, and I can't work very much at my missions.
I'm sorry about that, and I'm planning to start the fourth mission "The Ghost's Power".
Posted 21 May 2013 - 07:30 AM
I am starting again this project... I am working on a new mission, named " The Fight"... Stay Tuned!
1 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users