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Eminence
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#2941

Posted 14 April 2012 - 09:51 PM

QUOTE (Sanjeem @ Saturday, Apr 14 2012, 22:25)
Hey all, just wondering for a story or introduction to a story do you think that it would be suitable to ask the readers to listen to a theme tune before hand so that it adds effect? Or is that not really how stories here should be written/Laid out, might be a little odd...

I've been planning something anyway. First time in a long time.

Would you have it in a book? No. Let the writing 'add the effect'.

Failure
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#2942

Posted 14 April 2012 - 09:55 PM

QUOTE (Craig @ Tuesday, Apr 10 2012, 17:15)
I think my main problem is I'm busy at work, what with my ongoing coursework and diploma, I spend a lot of my time writing for that and by the time I get chance to sit down with a drink and come to working on my drafts, I can only get so far as notes and drawings because I'm too bummed out from my work. I never used to have this problem though. I have about 4 or 5 half finished pieces, a couple from a series and I just can't go anywhere with them. They aren't going anywhere, so maybe I've just got to wait.

I've completely lost touch with writing. I've spent a few Friday afternoons, however, scribbling down some stuff for something in my notebook--it's strange writing in full sentences rather than mathematical symbols biggrin.gif . Reminds of how writing can be a good form of escapism, mind you. Might get round to typing the story out once it's done.

Sanjeem
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#2943

Posted 14 April 2012 - 10:02 PM

QUOTE (Ziggy455 @ Saturday, Apr 14 2012, 21:38)
QUOTE (Sanjeem @ Saturday, Apr 14 2012, 21:25)
Hey all, just wondering for a story or introduction to a story do you think that it would be suitable to ask the readers to listen to a theme tune before hand so that it adds effect? Or is that not really how stories here should be written/Laid out, might be a little odd...

I've been planning something anyway. First time in a long time.

I think the use of music can be very helpful to certain aspects of a story. Sometimes though, it may seem forced and like it is trying evoke a certain mood when a writer should be able to do that without the aid of music.

I totally see where you're coming from, Thanks. That's actually the perfect answer I was looking for and now It's clearer whether I should include a theme tune or not.

@Emminence : I suppose you are right as well.

El Zilcho
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#2944

Posted 14 April 2012 - 10:16 PM

QUOTE (Sanjeem @ Saturday, Apr 14 2012, 23:02)
QUOTE (Ziggy455 @ Saturday, Apr 14 2012, 21:38)
QUOTE (Sanjeem @ Saturday, Apr 14 2012, 21:25)
Hey all, just wondering for a story or introduction to a story do you think that it would be suitable to ask the readers to listen to a theme tune before hand so that it adds effect? Or is that not really how stories here should be written/Laid out, might be a little odd...

I've been planning something anyway. First time in a long time.

I think the use of music can be very helpful to certain aspects of a story. Sometimes though, it may seem forced and like it is trying evoke a certain mood when a writer should be able to do that without the aid of music.

I totally see where you're coming from, Thanks. That's actually the perfect answer I was looking for and now It's clearer whether I should include a theme tune or not.

@Emminence : I suppose you are right as well.

Oxi did it on a piece (I think it was him). If done well, it's good. But Eminence does have a good point; it's best to let your writing do the talking.

El Zilcho
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#2945

Posted 16 April 2012 - 06:29 PM

Woah, just had a trippy idea. What if we had a big coo-op topic, where everyone wrote a small piece as a character who has walked into a particular bar, or lobby or office or whatever? Each person would write a bit interacting with the other, and we'd just freestyle from there, build characters and see where everyone's mutual contribution takes us?

Ziggy455
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#2946

Posted 16 April 2012 - 06:33 PM

QUOTE (El Zilcho @ Monday, Apr 16 2012, 18:29)
Woah, just had a trippy idea. What if we had a big coo-op topic, where everyone wrote a small piece as a character who has walked into a particular bar, or lobby or office or whatever? Each person would write a bit interacting with the other, and we'd just freestyle from there, build characters and see where everyone's mutual contribution takes us?

I had a very similar idea a while back and it was frowned upon. Now though, I think it's worth a try. I'd be a part of it. tounge2.gif

SIKKS66
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#2947

Posted 16 April 2012 - 11:58 PM

I know I am guilty of this but perhaps you are seeing your work as it would be on TV/film Sanjeem?

As has been suggested, let your writing do the talking, so to speak. (Also, that was a strange sentence I just wrote). Perhaps one day a musician will write some music based on what you wrote biggrin.gif

Mokrie Dela
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#2948

Posted 19 April 2012 - 11:49 AM

a quick question regarding "parts"

If you're writing a story with three "parts" would the first chapter of each part be chapter one?

Example:

Part one
Ch 1
Ch 2
Ch 3
Ch 4
Part two
Ch 1
Ch 2
Ch 3
Ch 4

Or would the chapters continue?
Part one
Ch 1
Ch 2
Ch 3
Ch 4
Part two
Ch 5
Ch 6
Ch 7
Ch 8


I'm not sure which is correct.

Boris The Vodka
  • Boris The Vodka

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#2949

Posted 19 April 2012 - 11:54 AM Edited by SatournFan, 19 April 2012 - 11:57 AM.

I think the first is better.

Also, please, check my first written story, if you can. I'd like to see some feedbacks. Here it is - Click it

Ziggy455
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#2950

Posted 19 April 2012 - 02:27 PM

QUOTE (Mokrie Dela @ Thursday, Apr 19 2012, 11:49)
a quick question regarding "parts"

If you're writing a story with three "parts" would the first chapter of each part be chapter one?

Example:

Part one
Ch 1
Ch 2
Ch 3
Ch 4
Part two
Ch 1
Ch 2
Ch 3
Ch 4

Or would the chapters continue?
Part one
Ch 1
Ch 2
Ch 3
Ch 4
Part two
Ch 5
Ch 6
Ch 7
Ch 8


I'm not sure which is correct.

I think that is entirely up to you on the way chapters are displayed and such.

Eminence
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#2951

Posted 19 April 2012 - 04:42 PM

To clarify what Ziggy said, it is totally up to you. You'll find examples of books that do either. Personally I prefer the first option, separating each part entirely, but if you prefer a long continuation, then more power to you.

Mokrie Dela
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#2952

Posted 19 April 2012 - 11:35 PM

Well the first is neater. Decisions time then!

AceRay
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#2953

Posted 20 April 2012 - 12:56 AM

Morkie: "Parts" are usually called "Acts" eg Act 1, Chapter 1.

Eminence
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#2954

Posted 21 April 2012 - 02:55 PM

QUOTE (AceRay @ Friday, Apr 20 2012, 01:56)
Morkie: "Parts" are usually called "Acts" eg Act 1, Chapter 1.

In a play, yes. Otherwise... not really.

Ziggy455
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#2955

Posted 21 April 2012 - 03:39 PM

I think when it comes to planning I run it out like so:

Act I
Main conflict introduced.


Act II
Middle portion, conflicts which lead into final act and resolution.


Act III
Final act and resolution.


I find the more neater I plan and such, the easier it is to keep track of the story. biggrin.gif

El Zilcho
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#2956

Posted 21 April 2012 - 04:21 PM

I never plan and therefore get bored halfway through. Pity my incompetence. tounge.gif

Mokrie Dela
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#2957

Posted 22 April 2012 - 12:17 AM

QUOTE (El Zilcho @ Saturday, Apr 21 2012, 16:21)
I never plan and therefore get bored halfway through. Pity my incompetence. tounge.gif

sometimes it works. You can overplan something. Then the work can feel artificial.

But spontaneous writing can often feel chaotic. Both have pros and cons.

I tend to plan it simply. Basic direction of where the story's going, and any main point planned.

Typhus
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#2958

Posted 22 April 2012 - 05:10 AM Edited by Typhus, 22 April 2012 - 05:13 AM.

Well, I'm out of The Bar. There's no point in creating a character and thinking of cool things to do if people just kill him off with unnecessary violence because they want to create another mob character. I thought it was a good idea for a thread too.

And I'm aware that Barty's not dead, but what's the point in writing about him now? Honestly?
I had a lot planned, a lot of possible interactions with the other characters and someone just comes along as says "He got shot with his own crossbow and had his arm cut off, lol!"
No build up, nothing.

There's just no point in continuing because any character I create will just be f*cked up anyway. Cheers for the few hours I thought I'd be able to contribute something though.

AceRay
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#2959

Posted 22 April 2012 - 05:46 AM

Damn, I feel like a massive cock right now.

I didn't know you had anything planned. I just picked the most convenient dude and just made up sh*t. I didn't know it was going to f*ck with any plans. Well, of course, looking back on it now it looks bad.

How about this: my character travels back in time and stops himself from killing Barty and Vincenzo only knocks him or something. I mean, it wouldn't change much.

Typhus
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#2960

Posted 22 April 2012 - 05:49 AM

QUOTE (AceRay @ Sunday, Apr 22 2012, 05:46)
Damn, I feel like a massive cock right now.

I didn't know you had anything planned. I just picked the most convenient dude and just made up sh*t. I didn't know it was going to f*ck with any plans. Well, of course, looking back on it now it looks bad.

How about this: my character travels back in time and stops himself from killing Barty and Vincenzo only knocks him or something. I mean, it wouldn't change much.

I'm out, just continue with your little crime story. Okay?

AceRay
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#2961

Posted 22 April 2012 - 05:58 AM

QUOTE (Typhus @ Sunday, Apr 22 2012, 18:49)
QUOTE (AceRay @ Sunday, Apr 22 2012, 05:46)
Damn, I feel like a massive cock right now.

I didn't know you had anything planned. I just picked the most convenient dude and just made up sh*t. I didn't know it was going to f*ck with any plans. Well, of course, looking back on it now it looks bad.

How about this: my character travels back in time and stops himself from killing Barty and Vincenzo only knocks him or something. I mean, it wouldn't change much.

I'm out, just continue with your little crime story. Okay?

Don't worry, I've changed it! Barty's in the same condition he was in before! Vincenzo ignores him! Please don't feel angry, I didn't mean to f*ck things up!

Your plans can go ahead, seriously!

ItsOnlyAce
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#2962

Posted 22 April 2012 - 06:59 AM

Yeah man you should continue icon14.gif I saw your character doing some gruesome sh*t in the future. Maybe even finishing off the guy that was bleeding out?

Eminence
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#2963

Posted 22 April 2012 - 12:04 PM

I haven't been this critical in a while... here goes.

Wow, what a brilliant, brilliant idea The Bar is. Seriously. It's a great concept, and I was looking forward to taking part myself. Until I read the first part. And then the second. And then the further down the page I got, the more I honestly had to restrain full on laughter.

I'm not just talking about the AceRay/Typhus situation. Although that's the best part. Honestly? The single best character in the entire thing so far, killed off immediately, for no reason? I'm with Typhus on that. Absolutely pathetic. What's the point? And the time travel thing to go back and fix it? Honestly? That's even worse.

But as I say, it's not just that. The opening has a guy being chased down by helicopters, by masses of police. Really? So we're actually in a GTA game, are we? Did he hit a pay n spray just outside the bar and everything became fine again? Bleh.

Oh, and everyone's a badass. We're mixed up in the crime wars of Italian mob families. Honest to f*cking god. I'm blown away by how original this all is.

But the worst part? There's just no awareness. Yeah, I get it, it's all experimental, it's all for fun. But something like this only works if there's both respect and awareness of the other participants and the other characters. I'm not just talking about killing one of the other characters off for no reason. I mean actually writing their character in the way their character would act. Zilcho paints his character, Nero, as a controlling, intelligent manipulator. In Ziggy's return, he's suddenly playing second fiddle to the badass gangster Lynch. He quivers and asks if the guy is dead. He uses such brilliant dialogue as 'asswipe'.

This is a brilliant idea, that can be not only fun but a way to experiment with styles; picking up how another character acts and trying to remain consistent. And yet... nothing. It's all just a tacky roleplay that has, before it leaves page one, got itself into time-loops and nonsense.

Do none of you know how to tell a story?

Typhus
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#2964

Posted 22 April 2012 - 12:48 PM Edited by Typhus, 22 April 2012 - 12:51 PM.

Thank you, thank you for complimenting my writing and restoring my faith in you people. I had a lot of ideas for this, most of which involved a new character who would observe the actions of the others and pad out their personalities a bit. But now what's the point? The whole 'man from the future bringing back Barty' thing is insulting. And I mean that, it's offensive. You just took a gigantic turd on my writing and think I'll just play ball again because you realised what you did and tried to undo it.
It doesn't work that way, you've just removed any legitimacy or realism this thing may have had.

Well, thanks to Eminence and Tyler and Ziggy for appreciating my work, I don't know if you guys realise just how much it means to read even the slightest praise of my writing. But I can't help but wish we could start the whole damn thing again and delete some of the story.

I want to keep doing it. But I can't write in the same thread that has magic f*cking genies bringing back my character who was needlessly killed in the first place.

Ziggy455
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#2965

Posted 22 April 2012 - 02:27 PM

I must say, I do agree with Eminence on this. When I came up with the idea to have the characters be consistent I didn't expect everybody to completely begin attacking each other. I'll agree, my story is quite generic -a mobster from a botched deal is generic as it gets nowadays- but this is a bar, I will admit it's a place where people are drinking for Christ' sake.

The Bar is a good idea, I like it and I'm glad I've taken the time to flesh it out and I'm grateful people are actually reading this but there has to be rules and structure if this is to work. You don't show up and kill somebody, would you do that in a real bar?

@Typhus: I like your work, I like your writing and to be honest I think you're f*cking better than me at it, don't get so pissed because of what somebody has done. I'm going through the motions and I'm going to be thinking of a fair system to stop you all hacking the f*ck out of each other.

On top of this, I'm going to be adding some new stuff to The Bar today to make it fair, expect changes. I can't believe this has you all at each other with guns shown. This is merely a setback to a good idea, lets not make this an impasse eh fellas?

Mokrie Dela
  • Mokrie Dela

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#2966

Posted 22 April 2012 - 03:10 PM

i was considering taking part. A character who'd been caught cheating and lost his wife, drowning his sorrows, observing the characters in the bar. Not a bad ass, just a factory worker trying to get drunk but getting inturrupted by the goings on.

But it didnt seem worth it to me. I'm trying to get JIF finished and with the one shots topic, im not sure if i can add a third thing without the quality of anything being harmed. Now after seeing the typhus situation, im thinking, as good as the concept is, what's the point?

I may look into it sometime though, i dunno

Ziggy455
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#2967

Posted 22 April 2012 - 03:19 PM

QUOTE (Mokrie Dela @ Sunday, Apr 22 2012, 15:10)
i was considering taking part. A character who'd been caught cheating and lost his wife, drowning his sorrows, observing the characters in the bar. Not a bad ass, just a factory worker trying to get drunk but getting inturrupted by the goings on.

But it didnt seem worth it to me. I'm trying to get JIF finished and with the one shots topic, im not sure if i can add a third thing without the quality of anything being harmed. Now after seeing the typhus situation, im thinking, as good as the concept is, what's the point?

I may look into it sometime though, i dunno

The concept has been up for one day. I'm expecting a few start up issues, but if you ever feel like joining, you're welcome to. The Typhus situation was done carelessly and I guess we all have to learn to branch our characters out.


Lethal Nizzle
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#2968

Posted 22 April 2012 - 04:44 PM

I had a feeling this would happen, that it would turn into a sort of roleplay. I still think the thread is a great idea, yet one or two people have just taken my character away from me and have manipulated him without consulting me. I thought that The Bar was just a setting, a place where an idea can grow and take its own course. Instead of pondering over a location for a piece, we had The Bar and we could do what we wanted with that character.

I questioned El Zilcho via PM about the idea of people using my characters, and I planned to build a structured series of pieces within the setting of The Bar, but other people have just taken my character and have made him do things I didn't want him to do. I think a little re-think is in order before I continue because I have no idea what to do know because my character's suddenly sharing drinks with someone I've never heard of.

Ziggy455
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#2969

Posted 22 April 2012 - 04:48 PM

QUOTE (Lethal Nizzle @ Sunday, Apr 22 2012, 16:44)
I had a feeling this would happen, that it would turn into a sort of roleplay. I still think the thread is a great idea, yet one or two people have just taken my character away from me and have manipulated him without consulting me. I thought that The Bar was just a setting, a place where an idea can grow and take its own course. Instead of pondering over a location for a piece, we had The Bar and we could do what we wanted with that character.

I questioned El Zilcho via PM about the idea of people using my characters, and I planned to build a structured series of pieces within the setting of The Bar, but other people have just taken my character and have made him do things I didn't want him to do. I think a little re-think is in order before I continue because I have no idea what to do know because my character's suddenly sharing drinks with someone I've never heard of.

Check the topic. I have implemented new rules and regulations for writers which will make things like this from happening again. I know it sucks when somebody takes your character into their story without consent. Check out the topic to see the new rules.

Linki
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#2970

Posted 23 April 2012 - 11:46 AM

I've never really checked out this area before. It seems very different to the rest of the site, almost like it's a different forum altogether. It looks quiet, but the quality of posts here are great compared to the rest of the forum, in terms of grammar and basic spelling.

Could I get an introduction to what goes on here? Are new users welcomed, or is this more of a "intellectual superiors only club"?




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