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BUYG: Build Up Your Gang IV

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Slingaa
  • Slingaa

    Unbowed, unbent, unbroken.

  • Members
  • Joined: 19 Sep 2009

#2011

Posted 22 November 2010 - 05:13 PM

Could I book a spot at the Messina Family at the Pillows Club please? I know you're not allowed, but the club will be heavily featured in my storyline.

Omnia sunt Communia
  • Omnia sunt Communia

    Tierra Y Libertad

  • Members
  • Joined: 12 Aug 2008
  • None

#2012

Posted 22 November 2010 - 11:57 PM

I would like to join the Triads at Underground Weapons Store, Algonquin please.

Chapter One
JOURNEY TO THE WEST
Triads Underground Weapon Store


This was it. His big shot at freedom. His chance for a new life, in Liberty City; land of opportunity. Land of freedom. Somehow he imagined it to be a bit more glamorous than this. The air was thick with the smell of human waste. Sweat clung to the walls of the freighter crate, occasionally falling from the ceiling and running down some poor person's face, sending a unpleasant shudder down their spine.

Craig Hsieh sat with his back against the steel wall of the crate. Holding his knees close to his chest he looked out into the darkness. He could see nothing of his surroundings but he knew exactly where he was and that he was not alone. The sodden whimper of his fellow passengers could be heard, just faintly, over the crashing of the sea waves.

There had been fourteen of them when they got on the boat at Hong Kong. He wasn't sure how many of them where left. Craig knew that at least one of them had died during the journey – he could smell it. The stench of fresh death that lingered inside the crate even to this day. He knew that it was a odour that he would never forget.

They had already been at sea for several weeks when the boat anchored itself and stopped moving. It took another few days before there was any sign of an end to their ordeal. A loud crashing noise echoed within the crate as something grabbed it from the outside and lifted it off the ground. The box swung violently causing everyone inside to slam into one wall and then fall against the next.

A bright, piercing light shone in through the doors as they creaked open. Several flash lights illuminated the crate, shining on the faces of those held within its bowels. Craig raised his arm to cover his face. A group of men stepped into the box and shouted, in Mandarin: “Alright you lot, out you get! You're here now! Get lost!”

The people who could still walk scampered out of the crate, leaving behind the weak and the dead to be manhandled by the group of men and forcefully removed. Craig rushed out as quickly as he could and stepped out into the cold harsh Liberty City night. He breathed a deep breath, sucking in as much clean air as his lungs could handle.

Looking around his he watched as the men, dressed in a mix of traditional Chinese garbs and imitation sportswear began to load the people, mostly young women, into the back of vans. Craig felt as though he should help them but he knew whatever happened – it was no use – he couldn't save them from their fate.

Turning around he began to make his way into Liberty, into freedom, when he was stopped by a short Chinese man. “Mr. Hsieh, is it?” he said in a thick accent. Craig nodded. “There seems to have been a problem with your payment, you still owe us $5,000.”

“That's impossible,” Craig replied, outraged, “I paid you the full sum, 40,000 Yuan, as promised.”

“Yes, about that,” the man spoke slowly, “there is a slight problem with exchange rates. Turns out that 40,000 Yuan still leaves us $5,000 short of what we initially asked for.”

“You can't do this,” Craig spat, “I spent all my life's saving on getting here! Where am I supposed to magic up another £5,000?”

“That's not for us to say,” the short man said in a cold unforgiving tone, “but until you do I'm afraid you belong to us. I want to see you bright and early at this address to begin work.”

“Work?”

“Yes, work,” he smiled, “You owe us, Mr. Hsieh, you don't think we're going to let you get away without paying your debt, do you?”

“What kind of work?”

“A bit of manual labour, nothing fancy. You'll see when you turn up for work tomorrow.”

“Where am I supposed to sleep tonight?”

“That is none of our concern. We were merely asked to bring you here, this isn't a package holiday Mr. Hsieh. Good night.”

With that the man walked off and joined the rest of the group by the vans. They discussed business for a few minutes before getting in their vehicles and driving off into the distance. Craig – too shocked to do anything – merely looked at the piece of paper the man had handed him:

    Mr. Cho
    Tattoo Parlour opposite Cavity Lane/Bismark Av Intersection
    Algonquin
    Knock on basement door

Craig has a bad feeling about this, but he had no choice. The Triads would be after him if he decided to do a runner and not pay them back the money he supposed owed them. He had not travelled halfway across the globe to be gunned down by some angry Triad debt collector – he had come to America to escape his troubles in Hong Kong – something that seemed ironic at this precise moment in time.

He decided to find somewhere warm to sleep tonight and would travel to Algonquin in the morning where he would begin his first days work as a free man in the land of opportunity.

aragond
  • aragond

    We are the Aragond. We will bury you.

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  • Joined: 26 Aug 2007

#2013

Posted 23 November 2010 - 11:14 AM

QUOTE (Tyla @ Nov 21 2010, 15:12)
Don't worry about it mate. Staff will sort you out soon. I'm sure when aragond or Maverick get some free time they'll fix things up.

In the meantime, if staff are willing to consider the new gangs, here's some tablework with assets that I think are fitting:

Ancelotti Family
Waste Management Plant
Fruit Markets
Sprunk Factory

Lupisella Family
South Bohan Docks
Whiskers Club
Construction Site

Messina Family
Pillows Club
Opium Nights
Liberty Transport Authority

Thoughts? Suggestions??

wow.gif
[I'm okay with this.jpg]

And thanks, Tyla, for the vote of confidence. smile.gif

Jacky!!!! WTF?! You're back!!
Those were some of the LOOOOOOOOOOOOONGEST exams ever! lol.gif
Welcome back!

QUOTE
I will enact a slots purge by the end of the month!

[I'm okay with this.jpg]
lol.gif

Thanks, Mav'. If you hadn't, I know another staff member that would have over Christ mas.

Tycek
  • Tycek

    Being a bastard works.

  • The Yardies
  • Joined: 20 Jul 2009
  • Poland

#2014

Posted 24 November 2010 - 08:46 PM Edited by Tycek, 25 November 2010 - 09:13 AM.

user posted image

The Lost MC chapter IX: Sometimes sun just doesn't want to shine



Kevin opened the car door and cold and stinking air from Alderney mixed up with warm air with aroma of air freshener. Kevin left the comfortable passenger seat and stood on broken asphalt of back alley in Alderney City, he grabbed door handle and slammed the door so hard that car rocked a little.

“I’ve lost two hours sitting here with you,” he yelled thru the open window.

“Time is flowing fast when you’re spending it with nice company. Besides you’re a loser, so you should like to lose,” car driver said and laughed.

“f*ck you,” Kevin answered with anger in his voice.

“Watch your tone, kid. I can f*ck up your entire life, so you better behave,” driver said closing the window. “See you,” he added and drove off.

Black Albany Washington turned right and disappeared behind the corner. Kevin checked his phone if anyone was trying to reach him, only to found out that he had three calls from his brother. He chose Tommy’s number and lifted the phone to his ear. First signal… second…third…fourth…fifth…

“Hi, Tommy here…”

“Hi bro,” Kevin interrupted only to hear another part of the answer.

“…I can’t answer the phone right now…”

“f*ck, f*ck, f*ck,” Kevin yelled and canceled the call.

He left his brother at the car park more than two hours ago. The Russians probably appeared just after he left and they were talking with Tommy right now. He thought he should go there and check if everything is all right, so he hopped on his bike and turned on the engine.

Alderney City wasn’t far from Westdyke, so Kevin got there in couple of minutes. He drove to the car park and stopped his bike on the other side of the road. Bunch of cops were examining the whole place and what was even worse few patrol cars blocked the entrance. Something had to happen there. Kevin got some strange feeling that Tommy was involved in this situation. Maybe he was arrested, maybe he is still escaping from the cops. Kevin didn’t want to think about other things, but thoughts about that were coming into his mind. He pictured his younger brother lying on the hospital bed and connected to all this medical equipment or hiding in some back alley with cops coming from all directions. There was also third thought – the scariest one.

Kevin pulled out his phone and started looking at the phone book entries. Whom he should call now? Yuri or this bald f*ck from the black Washington or maybe Ralph. He chose the first option and after a while, somebody answered in Russian:

Hello

“This is Kevin Rafferty. Can I talk to Mr. Yuri?” Kevin asked.

One minute.”

Kevin didn’t understand a word, but he thought the second word sounded similar to “minute”, so he decided to wait. After a few seconds he heard Yuri’s voice:

“Yes?”

“Hi, it’s me. Kevin Rafferty. Did you meet my brother on the parking lot, because I can’t find him?”

“Yes. We met him there, but he and his friends needed help. They were fighting with those other bikers,” Yuri answered.

“What?” Kevin yelled. “Where is my brother, please tell me.”

“He was wounded, so we got him to the Westdyke Hospital. He got shot in the stomach.”

“Thanks Yuri, I owe you,” Kevin answered and turned his bike back.

Fortunately this hospital was only a few blocks away, so Kevin got there in few minutes. He stopped his bike and rushed to the door. They parted with pneumatic hiss and air full of medical aroma struck him into face, which triggers in his mind another picture of wounded Tommy lying on hospital bed.

Kevin run to the ICU reception desk and almost attacked young woman sitting there. She was so scared that she dropped her pen on the floor. She was trying do duck under the desk to pick it up, when Kevin started his talk:

“Can you tell me how Tommy Rafferty is feeling? I know he was brought here some time ago,” he was saying this so fast that girl understood only half of this.

“Can you calm down, sir? Two men brought him here about half of hour ago. He got shot in the stomach and lose a lot of blood. Now his state is stabilized and he is lying in ICU,” girl said with calm in her voice.

“Could I see him? I’m his brother,” Kevin asked.

She looked at the clock hanging from the wall and said:

“I’m sorry sir, but the visiting hour are from 10 to 11 AM and from 20 to 21 PM only.”

“Thank, you,” Kevin said walking off from the reception desk. “I’ll wait.”

Kevin sat on one of the chairs standing in the hallway and started thinking. He rested his head in his palms and closed his eyes.

High pitched vibrating sound woke him up. He lifted his head from the tabletop of the school desk and looked up on the man sitting behind the desk..

“Lesson's over,” teacher said standing up. “Get out of here.”

Bunch of teenagers rushed out of classroom. It was their last lesson for today, so they wanted to get to their homes as fast as possible. Kevin stood up and slowly walked out from the class.

“Lazy bastards,” teacher muttered. “What did I do to deserve these idiots? Jesus.”

Kevin smiled and started walking to the main door. He pushed his way thru the colorful and loud crowd and he opened the door to the freedom.

He found himself on sidewalk bathed in sunshine rays. He heard some screams coming from the little concrete square located at the side of the school building. He looked there and saw circle made of people. Someone was getting his butt kicked. He decided to go there and check it. When he was closer, he saw his younger brother’s jacket lying on the ground. In this moment, some demon took control over his mind. He jumped in the middle and grabbed guy that was kicking his brother, which was lying on the ground and hiding his head in his arms. Kevin hit the attacker in the stomach and threw him on the ground.

“Tommy, are you okay?” he asked.

“Yeah, I think I’m okay,” Tommy grunted trying to stand up.

The guy, which was lying on the ground was trying to stand up, but Kevin kicked him in the stomach. He fell from his knees on the concrete and he grabbed his stomach. Kevin pull him to the vertical position and punched him in the face. The guy fell on the ground again.

“What is going on here?” someone shouted running to the crowd. “Stop this now.”

It was principal Wellman, who was called by one of the bystanders. He went into the circle and grabbed Kevin by his jacket’s flange.

“What the hell are you doing here? You’re going to be suspended Rafferty,” he said.

“I was just defending my brother from this guy,” Kevin said trying to defend himself.

“Is it true?” principal asked.

“Yes Mr. Wellman,” Tommy answered. “He attacked me and tried to steal my money.”

“All right,” principal said and looked at guy lying on the ground. “I’m suspending you for a week and you Rafferty for two days for attacking younger student.”

Kevin was staring blankly in the space, when one person from the crowd surrounding them came to him and grabbed his arms.

“Mister, mister,” woman shouted.

Kevin slowly opened his eyes and saw receptionist from the hospital looking in his eyes. She released his arms when she saw that he wasn’t sleeping anymore.

“Good, you woke up, sir. It is five past eight already if you would like to see your brother.”

“Thanks,” he said standing up. “I’ll go see him right now.”

“Turn left , go to the end of the corridor and turn left again. You will find your brother in the room on the left.

“Thanks,” Kevin said and walk down the corridor.

He came closer and saw cop sitting near the door. He stood up we he saw Kevin and made a few steps in his direction. Kevin turned around and started running thru the hospital, because he didn’t want to speak with pigs. He knew that they would start asking questions about the gang and about the shootout at the parking lot.

“I just wanted to ask some question,” he shouted, but the words missed Kevin running to the door.

“Control? I got suspiciously behaving man in Westdyke Memorial Hospital. I am commencing pursuit,” he said to radio he had on his shoulder.

Kevin rushed thru the reception, reached the door and ran outside. He jumped on his bike and tried to kick-start the engine. The cop that was chasing him was already at the door and what was worse squad car was approaching from behind the corner.

“Start, you f*ck,” Kevin swore jumping on the starting lever. “C’mon, bitch.”

Finally, the engine coughed and the bike jumped forward leaving big black cloud of exhaust fumes behind it. Kevin was riding at full speed in order to increase the distance between him and the cop car. He turned into the back alley, which trailed parallel to Plumbers Skyway. Fortunately for him this passage was too narrow for a cop car, so they had to stopped and turned away. He lost them, at least for a while, so he turned right into Catskill Ave. and drove straight to Acter.

He stopped his bike on the parking and went inside apartment building. Kevin came to the flat and threw himself on the bed. Springs in the old mattress howled sadly. He started looking at the white ceiling full of moisture stains looking like muesli he used to eat when he was a child. However, his childhood disappeared long ago. He was grown-up man, but he was acting like a child. He just let his younger brother fell into some serious trouble. Tommy was lying at the ICU at the hospital, where some decide to protect him, because they probably found very important witness in his person. That means he probably will be sent to prison, when he will be up on his feet again.

Kevin couldn’t stop thinking about it. Images were still circling in his mind, so he tried to concentrate on the biggest stain on the ceiling. He felt that his eyelids were becoming heavier and heavier, so he closed his eyes. A second later, he heard a strange quiet voice. He was trying to turn off all senses except the hearing to understand what this voice is saying.

“Kevin, Kevin,” he heard.

Somebody was calling his name. He opened his eyes widely and saw his brother face on the ceiling. The biggest stain was having his brother eyes, which were looking at him. One of the lighter places of the stain turned into Tommy’s mouth and begun his scream.

“Kevin, Kevin, help me. I’m begging you…please, don’t leave me here, please…

Kevin felt that bed is trying to suck him in. The mattress turned into a swamp that was sucking him in. He was stretching his arms up to grab something, but he could find anything.

“Kevin, please…I’m begging you, don’t live me here,” lips created from the moisture talked again.

The swamp was really strong and almost sucked Kevin inside. Only his face was on the surface. The rest of the body disappeared somewhere, so he couldn’t feel it. He had no arms, legs or torso. He had only face that still was seeing his brother face on the ceiling. Finally the swamp closed over him.


Kevin woke up in complete darkness. That was unusual for him, because even in the middle of the night a small amount of light was coming into the room. He was wet and little drops were running over his face and body. He stood up and the world came back to normal. He was still in his flat and he was standing near the bed with blanket lying over his feet. He put hand into pocket wet from the sweat and pulled out his phone. It was 1:04 AM. He dropped the phone onto the bed and went to the bathroom.

He took his clothes off and dropped them on the floor. Floor tiles in the bathroom were very cold similarly to the paddling pool in the shower. Kevin turned the knobs and warm water started to pour over his body. It was taking sweat with it along with anger and tiredness. He was standing there almost half of hour listening only to the noise of the water. When he decided that he was cleansed from all of the problems he came out from the shower and wrapped towel around his waist. He decided that he needs a big mug of coffee to scare off the nightmares, so he went to the kitchen and turned on the electric kettle. He came to the window and started looking at the sleeping city. Every person he knew was sleeping, but he was awake. Scary pictures that came into his mind were building even scarier dreams, so he knew that he couldn’t sleep. Closing eyes would trigger another scary vision. He heard that kettle made clicking noise, which means that water is boiled, so he poured water into the mug. Strong smell of coffee started circling in the kitchen and came into his nose and veins. Kevin grabbed the mug and sat into armchair standing in the room. He put mug on the armrest and closed his eyes.

Raju Grewal
  • Raju Grewal

    Raju Grewal

  • BUSTED!
  • Joined: 05 Aug 2009

#2015

Posted 27 November 2010 - 05:16 AM

try this link

mark-2007
  • mark-2007

    Big Homie

  • The Connection
  • Joined: 09 Apr 2006

#2016

Posted 27 November 2010 - 04:58 PM

Hey, feel free to get rid of me in the purge if you're not already. I had some fairly decent ideas formy Pavano stories way-back-when, but nothing now. Might come back sometime and start afresh somewhere else, but don't count on it.

Tyler
  • Tyler

    If only you could see what I've seen with your eyes

  • Moderator
  • Joined: 22 Mar 2009
  • Unknown
  • Newcomer of the Year 2010

#2017

Posted 30 November 2010 - 02:12 PM

I'm going to go ahead and start writing chapters again, seeing as this place is more active. Feel free to critique my work however you want, I'm really trying to improve my writing. Anyway, if you couldn't tell, it's a re-boot of my story.

Chapter I


Sometimes sh*t just hits the fan. You can try to plan for everything – get plans down to a science, never trust someone outside the family, kill off loose ends – but there's always one f*ck up that gets ya'. Pegorino's learned that old fashioned-style. Jimmy got three bullets in the head – didn't even let 'em have an open coffin funeral it was so sick. After that Phil got popped boarding a flight to Washington. Private jets have their advantages and disadvantages in the end.

Peg's son, Gerald, came into the head of the family after all of the bloodshed is done. Rebuilt what he had left and brought the family to what it is today, with the help of me and a few friends, of course. We got a few good fronts now, nothing too big. Times are changing, though. Gerald thinks it's high time we try and get ourselves on the map again. This time it's not about the Commission, though. This time we're not looking for partners or associates. Pegorino's are cruising for one thing, and we don't care how we get it.

Small snippets of paper and plastic gust around the occasional burst of steam from the manhole covers in the streets. Aside from the usual backdrop of the ever-so-distant sirens and busy streets, this part of Liberty lies snug asleep. Cars litter the streets, all parked, lobbed onto the side – separating any drunk drivers from hitting the once unlucky pedestrian. It's not uncommon in the city, but the buildings still have a sense of gloom and mundane that could get even the Brady bunch to commit suicide. Bare and high brown walls rise up to the rails above, enclosing the scene into even more of a shadow. Barred windows or not, most of the buildings have at one point or another had a break-in. All of them keep a ferocious amount of graffiti signed by local gangs on the non-window bearing sides.

Garbage plants usually don't attract any attention in the first place. That's what makes them perfect for 'disposing' of dead bodies and evidence from a crime you just don't need lying around. Need something disintegrated, just throw it into the putrid concoction of White Phosphate and Water they call an 'Acid Bath', and it's gone in sixty seconds. No one hears a thing for miles around, and the closest thing you got to cops are the part-timers down by the High School. There's a reason they took that job, and it ain't because they like to mess around with murdering gangsters.

For as big a place as the garbage plant is, there's only one administrative building, and it's just for paperwork and some interrogations. A couple of low-lifers hang around and watch sh*t on T.V or just play a game of cards every once and a while, but other then that it's just me and Murphy. Murphy's been running the place for a good ten years, and he's seen pretty much everything the Pegorino's have done – seeing as they go to him to clean it up. Before this job he did some two-bit jobs around the West Coast, but I never hear about those days from him. He don't really like to talk about his past that much. Always one to wear sweat pants though. If anything, he likes to 'reinforce the stereo-type, so's no one thinks he's actually a mobster'. I've even heard him practising cheesy one-liners in the back-rooms when he thinks no one is in. “Looks like your garbage. Guess what? I like to clean up Garbage-” Pow! He says. I guess everyone gets through the day somehow, though. I just accept this life and thank the lord I ain't dead yet.

“Ey Daniel, catch!” I hear before a blunt object hits my chest and steals the breath from my chest. “Wake up you lazy bastard, we got some errands to run today,” Murphy makes a bit of a jolt out of his room as he pulls on his rain coat and walks past me to the crusty metal door. Not the warmest of welcomes, but I've woken up under worse circumstances. Turns out the object was an unregistered pistol, nine bullet clip included. “Don't worry about fingerprints, let's call it my special gift to you”

“Well I knew you loved me, but jee this is just too much” Sarcasm was a ripe conversation point in most of the small-talk that went on around the Flop-house.

Minutes later we both sat in Murphy's Black Sentinel, whilst I continued rummaging for a spot in my coat to fit the gun in. After some time, I had it lodged on the left inside jacket slot, ready to pull out, just in case. “Cold as hell outside, why doesn't this f*cking car warm-up faster?” Murphy seemed a bit agitated today. Much more than his usual relaxed persona. On a regular day you could walk up to the guy with a trunk full of dead women and he'd reply with a simple 'Yeah, I'll get it done'. Today it looked like his Gray hair was transforming into a toupee before my eyes. “So what exactly are we doing?” Seemed to float around the car for an hour or so before Murphy came back with a “Gerald wants us to meet down at Honkers to talk about some business opportunities. Says we might start doing something other than this garbage sh*te”

“If only, every time I come home I smell like two-week old ass.” The car had finally warmed up to a point where Murphy deemed drivable, and pulled the stick stick to drive. The engine creaked and moaned as he pulled out into the empty Aldernney street, pulling past a foggy lamp above. 'Peaceful Easy Feeling' played on the radio, Murphy as an Eagles fan. Never cared much for them myself, but then again I wasn't much of a classic type. “f*cking hate winter-time in this city”

“You and me both man” There was one thing I don't think anyone would disagree with. No matter where you came from – black, white, woman, man, grocery store manager, serial killer – you hated winters in Liberty City.

.2D
  • .2D

    Look at the Flowers.

  • Andolini Mafia Family
  • Joined: 25 Jun 2009
  • United-Kingdom

#2018

Posted 03 December 2010 - 12:23 PM

Terrible, Tyler, absolutely terrible sly.gif

Naaaaaah, t'was a good read, I didn't know you did BUYG cry.gif


Feel free to remove me guys, been working on something bigger recently so I doubt I'll be posting a new chapter anytime soon. I'll be sure to come by and start this again at some point, though. icon14.gif

vinnygorgeous
  • vinnygorgeous

    "Crash JP Morgan buy silver"

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Apr 2009

#2019

Posted 15 December 2010 - 01:03 PM

Gambetti crime family at the Leisure Center
Chapter 2

Alderney

The drive to Alderney through congested Liberty City streets was frustratingly slow. I was stuck in stationary traffic on the Hickey Bridge when the Weasel News bulletin woke me from an idle daydream.

More bad news for the Messina crime family. Dozens more wise guys from the ailing mafia family were arrested this morning. Joining the already jailed family hierarchy including boss Harvey Noto. A FIB spokesperson said the arrests stem from the wiretap evidence gathered by super grass Fredo Volpe. Agent Vega of the mafia taskforce told us earlier, “The Messina family is close to being completely wound up. We estimate that there are less than twenty active members remaining and we have cases on all of them, its just a matter of time before we get them.”

In unrelated news the bodies of half a dozen men, also believed to be associated with the Messinas, were discovered floating in the Humboldt. Crime experts have speculated that the other families are severing all ties with the troubled crime syndicate.

Mike Whitely, Weasel News.


Suddenly it became very clear why Sammy wanted to see me. I was meeting him in the disused Sprunk factory. I found him on the top floor gazing through a broken window. His posture as always indicated power, the deep pride and inner strength that had taken him to the upper echelons of the family at such a young age shone through. His head tilted slightly back and his hands joined behind his back.

“Sonny, sorry. f*ckin’ traffic on the bridge, I should’ve taken the tunnel.”

“I told you before about this, disregard my time and your playing with fire.”

He gripped his jacket pocket so the shape of a small handgun was visible through the material.

“Look out this window John, what do you see?”

“Liberty City’s ugly sister, I’d take the docks and maybe buy a house but stack a claim, nah.”

“Yeah well you shovel all day you never get your head up far enough. Alderney may as well be an open city. The Pegorinos right now, forgetta bout it, even if they wanted to keep the LC families out, they couldn’t. The f*ckin’ Pavanos are in prime position right now. But that bitch is about as popular as small pox over here. So two camps; each trying to knock each other off, but with the feds sucking up their manpower. Neither can quite do it.”

“So whose our man?”

“Lupa Frattelli. He’s got the Boccino crew or what’s left of it behind him. He’s done serious time and he never ratted plus our crew had ties with Ray so its him.”

“Okay Sonny, you want me to organise a sit down?”

“Nah I want you to meet with him. Tell him: I’ll back him as the new boss of the Pegorinos. I’ll lend him the manpower to win this little war with Aldo Gatti. And I’ll get the commission to recognise him as the legitimate boss of the Pegorinos and maybe even a seat on the commission itself.”

I couldn’t help but wonder what Roy would make of Sammy’s moves but what do I know. This could all be Roy’s idea but I doubt it. Sammy took a snub nosed revolver from his pocket and I’ve got to say it worried me. All I could think was, why all this preamble to a hit? Does he enjoy listening to himself talk so much that he shares his plans with hit vics so their last moments on earth are spent bathing in his vanity. Sammy still fidgeting with his pockets continued.

“And in return we’re equal partners in all Alderney operations, fifty-fifty split.”

Finally he produced a packet of cigarettes, tapped the pack at either end, then placed one in his mouth. He slowly lifted the revolver pointing it at my face.

“Don’t let me down again John, you’re out of chances with me.”

He turned the revolver around and pointed it at his own head then pulled the trigger and out came a flame. He inhaled deeply from his cigarette with an ever so slight grin, b*stard.

Sammy had already arranged the sit down with Frattelli. I was to go to a restaurant in Berchem immediately. This caused me some concern because I was alone and unarmed due to Sammy’s insistence on my being so at our meetings. The traffic had started to ease and I made it there in under half an hour. The restaurant was on the corner of Cockerell Avenue and Bear Street. Its slogan, ‘smells of old Italy, tastes of old Italy’ is proudly displayed on red canopies all along the front. The most impressive thing about the place was its sheer size. Inside the smell of cigar smoke and garlic greeted you along with an attractive brunette hostess. She smiled and waited for me to speak.

“Ah, Lupa is expecting me.”

“Wait here please.”

She disappeared out of my line of sight, returning a few moments later with a tall slim man who instructed me to follow. We passed a group of middle-aged women on a long dinning table, as we passed their conversation abruptly hushed, they were careful not to make eye contact but I could feel their stares when we had passed causing me to add an extra bounce to my stride. We went behind the bar then through a hatch in the floor and down to the cellar. There were four men standing around, all with copious amounts of jewellery. One was reading the label of a bottle of red wine.

“You know this stuff costs a hundred and forty dollars a bottle upstairs. Here take it, its yours.”

“Yeah right thanks. You Lupo?”

“Yeah that’s right, so the great Sammy Botino sent your guinea ass for me to do what I please with huh? Nah seriously what’s he selling?

“Sammy wants to be partners in all Alderney operations, we’ll make you boss, square you with the commission but we get fifty percent of everything.”

“Yeah well before all that something has to be done about Ali Barber.”

“Ali Barber?”

“F*ckin Aldo Gatti! What you LC guys never heard that name. The butcher of Westdyke Ali Barber. He’s been in the papers constantly since Jimmy was whacked by that fa**ot Russian. A lot of the guys that looked to Jimmy and Phil are now looking to him.”

“Yeah yeah, Sammy say’s well take care of that too.”

“Alright my man. It’s a beautiful thing our families coming together like this.”

The hatch crashed open and the tall slim man from before rushed in, panting and flushed he spluttered his words.

“Soap and Mamo are cornered, Ali’s boys tried to whack em at Pizza This but its turned into a standoff, Ali’s boys outside and them hauled up inside.”

“Mutha f*ckas. Alright Nicky go get everybody and I mean everybody including that fa**ot nephew of yours. Louie get the guns. And you Sammy’s boy, in the interests of our newly formed partnership I’ll expect you’ll be joining us?”

“Yeah why not.”

I was equipped with an AK along with four extra clips, if nothing else these boys had plenty of firepower. There were only six of them but each had several weapons strapped to them, ranging from Mac10’s to M4’s with bundles of grenades to boot. One guy even had an RPG strapped to his back. This was gonna get messy. We made our way to a van parked along the road from Nonna Pina’s, it had the restaurants logo printed on the side.

When we arrived at Pizza This we were surprised see a police cruiser parked amongst the Emperors and PMP’s. Even more unnerving was the fact that the cops seemed to be working with the Pegorino soldiers to find a way into the restaurant. The back door of the van was opened from the outside by Lupo.

“C’mon get out. Nicky you and your nephew go left, Louie go right. Everyone else come with me.”

Four of us matched up to the main group our guns aimed at their backs. Finally when we were less than ten feet from them one of the cops turned round.

“Ooo f*ck.”

I’m not sure who fired first other than it wasn’t me. It was like the St Valentines day massacre, they all got shot in the back except for the one cop who by facing us took a barrage all over the front of his body. I’d emptied an entire clip into the backs of those men. I released the empty magazine placed it in my pocket and took another from my jacket. I could hear gunfire to both my left and right and was about to look up when a small spurt of blood landed on the AK. The guy on my left had been hit in the shoulder and had dropped his weapon. Lupo shouted.

“Their on the roof!”

I looked up to see the silhouettes of two men firing down at us, I lifted the AK and began to fire wildly in their direction. I heard Lupo shout again.

“F*ck they killed Sal, he’s had his head blown off.”

The fizzing sound of bullets passing close to your ears is about an unnerving sound as you are likely to hear. My heart felt like it was pumping as fast as the AK was churning out bullets. I had done my second mag. Once again I reloaded but as I banged the third clip into place I was flung to the ground. Louie had fired his RPG at the roof bringing a fairly large chunk of the top of the building down around us but also killing the rooftop gunners. Louie hurried over to us and helped shift the debris from our bodies.

“You alright boss?”

Lupa simply replied.

“They f*ckin killed Sal.”

I could still hear gunfire to our left but none of it seemed to be directed at us. It was at this point when the front door opened and out stepped two men wielding pistols.

“Soap, Mamo, c’mon lets get the f*ck outta ere.”

We limped our way back to the van most of us carrying at least some personal injury. When either Soap or Mamo said.

“Look Nicky.”

Nicky was crouching behind a shot up and smoking Emperor. His nephew was laying in the road in separate pieces. Another group of men was firing from behind an equally damaged PMP. We started to limp our way back checking our weapons as we went when once again we were flung to the ground by the force of dual car explosions.

“Nicky…”

“We gotta go Lupo!”

Once again we picked ourselves up and limped back to the van. No one spoke on the journey so who ever was driving turned on the radio.

Weasel News

Messina consigliore Harry Hall was sentenced to five consecutive life sentences toda…


“Turn the f*ckin radio off Soap.”

He duly obliged.

aragond
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#2020

Posted 17 December 2010 - 01:40 PM

One of the Staff of BUYG IV has annual leave after Christmas. inlove.gif cool.gif inlove.gif

Perhaps this time... things will be different!
moto_whistle.gif

Slingaa
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#2021

Posted 18 December 2010 - 11:43 AM

QUOTE (aragond @ Dec 17 2010, 14:40)
One of the Staff of BUYG IV has annual leave after Christmas. inlove.gif cool.gif inlove.gif

Perhaps this time... things will be different!
moto_whistle.gif

f*ck yes, time to resurrect this bitch!

Will the IV families be added for definite, because I have a pretty good storyline for the Messina family.

Tyla
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#2022

Posted 18 December 2010 - 01:21 PM

I don't see why not. The codes are there, and I'm pretty sure aragond is warm to the idea. Nice to hear you've got yourself some annual leave, mate. Seasons greetings!

As for myself, most of my efforts lately have been going into my London topic [insert shameful self promoting here] and as a great deal of it will revolve around characters I use/plan on using in my Irish stories (Bucky, Derrick) I'm looking to get that done coinciding with my next chapter here, which will be set in Manchester and also feature characters from my topic. It could be called a prequel to a prequel, if there's such a thing rolleyes.gif Hopefully it will enable me to flesh out those in my BUYG chapter II to the same standard of I and give some reasoning behind the choice of locale so it doesn't appear as though I'm setting a story in Manchester for the sake of it.

Build Up Your Gang
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#2023

Posted 25 December 2010 - 11:51 PM Edited by Build Up Your Gang, 03 January 2011 - 03:47 AM.

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Welcome to the FINAL REVIEWS of 2010!!!!

Oh, yes, it has been a while. Indeed, this year, there has been fifteen ratings, compared to ONE HUNDRED last year. But, when you consider there were 396 rated stories in 2009 compared to just 78 this year, it kinda all works out. (5.2 stories a rating this year versus 3.96 the year before, yes, you could argue Staff have been less on the ball this year. But, I would remind players that there were fourteen different staff members, compared to just four this year -- and mostly just two.)

Anyway, this is meant to be good news week: we're getting ratings, the first and last for December!! And NEXT, as promised for many months, Staff is going to clean-up the grids, add some gangs, and get this bi7ch ready for 2011!! HOO-AH!! lol.gif wink.gif

Osric
Petrovic Bratva | Comrades Bar | Chapter I: In The Beginning....
Replacing Ciabatta in the Comrades Bar, who hasn't been around since May 28 2009. Fark! Did it *REALLY* take us THAT long to purge him?!?!?!?!?
$38 + $675 = $713

Staff wants you to think about this: does any mobster actually *think* about himself AS a mobster? Do mobsters refer to their thing as the mafia? No, they're just guys, doing a job, sure, a dirty job, for a family, or a brotherhood or a boss, like anyone else has a job. So, no, they don't, and neither should Yuri. Yes, it makes it easier for your reader to understand what Yuri is and what he's thinking about, but one of the joys of reading someone else's writing, especially when it's first person, like yours, is to figure the character out from the clues they drop, not to have it presented to them like a resume. Heck, YOU don't sit there thinking to yourself "My name is Osric...", but are far more casual about mentioning your name, even if you are telling your story to someone else.
Remember also that mobsters more often than not take advantage of their own kind when they set-up in the new world: Russian gangsters take advantage of Russian immigrants, Mafia of Italians. So, they're less likely to view their compatriots as "poor immigrants" than suckers. Not a universal rule. Perhaps Yuri IS different and thinks of his poor father that struggled all his life and died a penniless man and this informs Yuri's compassion for his people, even if he has to break some of their legs sometimes so he can earn a living. But, then, like Niko, he may be compassionate on some of his victims sometimes.
Your opening was less than what it could have been, though it was better than many. Try opening with evocative adjectives rather than explaining explicitly what's happening. And Staff doesn't "get" why Yuri is telling me about what's happening outside from outside's perspective (telling me like I was standing out there) when he's sitting in the nice warm bar.
So, for example:
QUOTE
The piercing wind howled through the doorway as yet another cold soul stepped inside Comrades, taking shelter from Broker's icy stare. Land of freedom. PAH! Cold War's been over twenty years, but Liberty City still looks down on Russians. Even other immigrants don't trust us, because of a failed communist regime that's been dead for a generation. So, we live in the sewer of Broker, where gangs deal drugs, steal goods, kill innocent people, and sell their little sisters for ten bucks.
Just a thought.
menacing-looking try instead he was very imposing and menacing You don't need to explain that he LOOKED menacing. We'll assume that because you're telling us what you're seeing.
He finally went off the phone, and hung up. Too many words to explain something pretty simple: He finally hung up.
When it's first person, you don't: I gulped. , but instead: I swallowed hard.
Staff endorses this line: that's right, the Pakhan himself. The dialogue fits perfectly, good use of dialect, and it make me grin. I like Boris already. He's a mob boss, but he's a little flippant, humourous. Was probably a bit of a smart-a$$ as a underling back in the day. See how much I read into a mere five words? The power of good writing! Although, there should have been a dash between Petrovic and that's rather than just a comma. Reason? It's a break or change-of-topic in the sentence.
Hank Petrovic??????? Really?!?!?!?!?!
And Josh Moore is leading the M.O.B.?? Josh doesn't sound very black. I thought the M.O.B. were a black gang?
Still, Staff is not disappointed with this story. At 766 words, it's got length, and though nothing more than a conversation happens, you've established three main characters quite well, and there's goodness to be had. Staff is looking forward to future stories.
Sidebar: Staff has been going back through all your past posts -- your last actual story was August 2009 -- and noticed that you have been campaigning for the Ancelottis to be added for EIGHTEEN MONTHS now!!! (June 11, 2009, folks!) Now, that you're starting up in Petrovic (for about a fifth go), would you like staff to hold off adding the Ancelottis (sometime this week) for a few weeks until you finish your five stories so you can swap over to the Ancelottis?
Better yet, you just name which Ancelotti slot you want and it's yours in reserve. Since no one, but NO ONE!!, has campaigned as hard as you!!!! lol.gif



Jacky Fiend
Triads | Underground Weapons Store | Chapter One Journey to the west
$46 + $283 = $329
Brilliant. Now THAT's an opening paragraph Staff wants BUYGers to read and absorb! Full of raw extremes of emotion: full of human hopefulness one minute; grossed-out the next. lol.gif Truly brilliant! icon14.gif
I've never met a Chinese guy who chose the name "Craig", btw. Too difficult for the Chinese mouth to pronounce easily, I guess. But we'll let that pass.
And nice choice of paragraph structure. Staff developed a nice easy rhythm while reading them. None that are a single line (dialogue aside) but none that are pages long. Easier to read this way. Good!
871 words. Good length.
And nice choice with the illegal immigrant/indentured servant storyline! Staff endorses this one, too. Topical and underappreciated. A bold choice! smile.gif
The line: whatever happened - it was no use - he couldn't save them from their fate. should actually have commas, not dashes. Dashes represent a strong aside, one not relevant to the rest of the sentence, or a break in the sentence (see Osric's above). Yours is neither, and should be just commas since it definitely relates to the rest of the sentence.
Staff was impressed with this and looks forward to reading more of these stories. Please stick around, Jacky!


Tycek
The Lost MC | The Lost Clubhouse | Chapter IX: Sometimes sun just doesn't want to shine
$41 + $100 Tenth Story Bonus + Credit for one free weapon chosen at your leisure + $1,116 = $1,257
Admin note: Staff really don't mind what people write as their chapter numbers -- look at Aragond's convoluted episodes and parts -- but please DO include a small reference to what story this is for you, 'cuz otherwise Staff risk getting your counts wrong and depriving you of designated rewards. To wit, this is actually your tenth story in the series, Tycek, since staff didn't disregard your police-focused story.
I've counted at least twice that you write: so Kevin got there in few minutes. It really wasn't necessary the first time, much less so the second. You don't have to tell us how long it took him, unless that's somehow important, because as readers time is flexible anyhow: A few minutes, a few days. Meh, it's all just a sentence to us, wadda we care?
Kevin's acceptance of having to wait at the ICU reception seemed too much of a contrast with his desperation to see his brother moments before. You might have had him agitate to get inside only to calm down and accept it when security arrived. It's a minor point.
I like the schoolyard interlude. Good thought!! It's a little cliche, but it tells us a lot about how Kevin regards his brother.
Helpful tip: The guy, which was lying on the ground ... Things are "which", and people are "who" in English.
Springs in the old mattress howled sadly. WOW! Nice line!! icon14.gif
At 2,313 words, this story is a MONSTER! Which means Staff is a little confused why you felt it necessary to include the last two paragraphs which didn't seem to say anything or add much.
Still, this was quite good, with some nice ideas, especially the dream and flashback. But, take care with your grammar. There were some mistakes in the swamp dream that you don't usually make anymore. Regardless, Staff look forward to Kevin's next move.


Unoriginal44
Pegorino Family | Garbage Disposal Inc. | Chapter 1
$43 + $4,114 = $4,157
Admin note: Please always include reference to the gang and location you're playing from. Staff don't want to have to guess, much less look it up on the front-page. smile.gif
1028 words = good length.
that could get even the Brady bunch to commit suicide. lol.gif [Staff approves of this line.jpg] And, another: Today it looked like his Gray hair was transforming into a toupee before my eyes. icon14.gif
You've got some great lines in this, and yet some that really don't work, such as: ... before a blunt object hits my chest and steals the breath from my chest. No, no, no. One rule of thumb (which means it's a rule, but not a hard-n-fast rule) is never repeat a noun in the same sentence, and never the same adjective probably in an entire paragraph. It just reads wrong. Sometimes you can't help it, but this is a good example of where you could have helped it, and it was so very unnecessary when all you needed to write was: before a blunt object hits my chest and steals my breath away. Take care with all your sentences, 'cuz you're letting down some really good writing with some less careful choices.
BTW, did Staff miss something? Weren't these guys at the garbage joint? So how could their car pull out onto (not into ) the empty Aldernney street ??
Staff likes the characters, there's some awesome lines in there, dry funny stuff, and overall, Staff looks forward to how this all unfolds. Just, take care with some minor errors.


vinnygorgeous
The Gambetti Family | Leisure Center | Chapter 2 Alderney
$42 + $1,660 = $1,702
Vinny, may Staff just say, WELCOME BACK!! And what a darn fine back you've brought with you! I like it, mixing three gangs into your storyline, it has... authority, conspiracies in the making. Real Godfather-esque sh!t, and Staff approves.
And at a weighty 1,864 words, you've got the correct measure. However, some minor grammatical issues slow my hungry reading down unnecessarily.
disregard my time and your playing with fire should, of course, be you're because the word is standing in for you are not that it's his playing. Likewise, Their on the roof! is, of course, they're for the same reason.
And the broken line of
QUOTE
When either Soap or Mamo said.

"Look Nicky."
shouldn't be. Ever. The "said" part of the dialogue should always be with the dialogue, for one, so it should be
QUOTE
When either Soap or Mamo said , "Look , Nicky ! "
On the other hand, if it was meant to be broken up, you'd describe it differently, perhaps like this:
QUOTE
...injury, when either Soap or Mamo shouted in surprise.

"Look Nicky."
As I said, minor stuff.
BTW, Dozens more wise guys from ... I'm not so sure even Weasel News would use the term "wise guys", but we'll let it pass.
I also wasn't entirely convinced about the second part. It wasn't as strong as the first, in Staff's humble opinion. It didn't seem as connected, as necessary to the overall storyline, but just a random burst of violence because ... we have to. Perhaps it gets explained later, which is fine. But, always remember that dialogue and story is what ties it all together, with the action being a vital expression of dialogue, so to speak. Still, Staff liked this.


Staff would like to express his gratitude to all players of BUYG IV for their forebearance regarding low staff participation rate this year. Staff lives in hope that perhaps, in 2011, things will be better.

Ratings courtesy of Aragond

Osric
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#2024

Posted 28 December 2010 - 09:35 PM

Wow! I'm back after a long vacation, and I guess I could get back into the Petrovic Bratva after so long. Almost forgot about this place.

Refresh me on what the Ancelottis have, and I'll reserve a spot.

Yeah, I haven't written in a long time, that first post wasn't really planned out, just wirrten on the spot so I could say I wrote something. I'll plan things out better. As for Josh Moore, I chose a name that could belong to a black man, without being overly stereotypical like Jamal or Tyrone.

I'll also flesh out Yuri's background more, now that we're back in the groove!

TheLostBiker
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#2025

Posted 29 December 2010 - 02:18 AM

Hmmm. IF one of the writers is inactive, Put me anywhere on the lost MC. If not, Put me here:
Triads: Algonquin Underground Weapons Store

I'll make the Triads bikers tounge.gif

Tyla
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#2026

Posted 29 December 2010 - 12:15 PM

QUOTE (Osric @ Dec 28 2010, 21:35)
Wow! I'm back after a long vacation, and I guess I could get back into the Petrovic Bratva after so long. Almost forgot about this place.

Refresh me on what the Ancelottis have, and I'll reserve a spot.

Yeah, I haven't written in a long time, that first post wasn't really planned out, just wirrten on the spot so I could say I wrote something. I'll plan things out better. As for Josh Moore, I chose a name that could belong to a black man, without being overly stereotypical like Jamal or Tyrone.

I'll also flesh out Yuri's background more, now that we're back in the groove!

The Ancelottis are slated to have the Waste Management Plant in Algonquin and the Fruit Markets & Sprunk Factory in Alderney tounge.gif

What ever became of Maverick's proposals? I think having the ability to write for two gangs at the same time would be grand, especially for me as I could weave two storylines together and Osric who has some good characters in his Petrovic stories but, with the beloved Ancelottis calling, would be forced to pick between the two.

Maybe this is coming soon? Like that elusive condominium development in Vice City? moto_whistle.gif

Maverick24
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#2027

Posted 29 December 2010 - 12:29 PM

QUOTE (Tyla @ Dec 29 2010, 12:15)

The Ancelottis are slated to have the Waste Management Plant in Algonquin and the Fruit Markets & Sprunk Factory in Alderney  tounge.gif

What ever became of Maverick's proposals? I think having the ability to write for two gangs at the same time would be grand, especially for me as I could weave two storylines together and Osric who has some good characters in his Petrovic stories but, with the beloved Ancelottis calling, would be forced to pick between the two.

Maybe this is coming soon? Like that elusive condominium development in Vice City?  moto_whistle.gif


The proposals are coming very soon. Between a car crash at the beginning of the month, a totally bonkers time at work, and the chaos that is Christmas: this month has been a write-off. Anyway, the New Year seems the perfect time to see these changes come into play.

Osric
  • Osric

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#2028

Posted 29 December 2010 - 12:44 PM

I'll reserve the Fruit Markets in Alderney for the Ancelottis when they come out.

Tyla
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#2029

Posted 29 December 2010 - 12:47 PM

QUOTE (Maverick24 @ Dec 29 2010, 12:29)
QUOTE (Tyla @ Dec 29 2010, 12:15)

The Ancelottis are slated to have the Waste Management Plant in Algonquin and the Fruit Markets & Sprunk Factory in Alderney  tounge.gif

What ever became of Maverick's proposals? I think having the ability to write for two gangs at the same time would be grand, especially for me as I could weave two storylines together and Osric who has some good characters in his Petrovic stories but, with the beloved Ancelottis calling, would be forced to pick between the two.

Maybe this is coming soon? Like that elusive condominium development in Vice City?  moto_whistle.gif


The proposals are coming very soon. Between a car crash at the beginning of the month, a totally bonkers time at work, and the chaos that is Christmas: this month has been a write-off. Anyway, the New Year seems the perfect time to see these changes come into play.

Ouch! And they say that these things come in threes. Hopefully you have an enjoyable New Year and I'll look forward to seeing the developments when they come about!

TheLostBiker
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#2030

Posted 29 December 2010 - 04:45 PM

Can someone fill me in as to if I can start writing my Triad Intro? I've got a page already biggrin.gif

Build Up Your Gang
  • Build Up Your Gang

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#2031

Posted 29 December 2010 - 05:46 PM Edited by Build Up Your Gang, 07 February 2011 - 10:27 PM.

Transition time begins. Staff aims to put the time in across the next few days to get this fully realised and working.
Basically, the plan is to totally reboot the entire thing starting with the first three posts on Page 1. These explain how BUYG works and, as such, will be the first to change.
This post, and the three following, will be working copies for the new introduction posts. Give them time to evolve, but also use them as chance to provide feedback.

Thanks for the time and patience.
Build Up Your Gang


Changes made:
First three posts to be arranged as follows:
Post 1
General Description, Rules, Guidelines and Writing Hints
New content includes description of the new format to the game.
Post 2
Gangs reorganised to remove user based content. Weapons and vehicles combined in this post. Drugs stuff gone.
Post 3
Reserved for writer's cards.
*** Update 1st Jan ***
-Updated Writer's Cards adding Tyla, Slingaa and a summary table with some "jumpto" tags for navigation.
-A five gang limit has been imposed on the number you may simultaneously write for.
-Rules simplified for purpose of new game mechanics, however could use some more thought...
-Weapons formatted into more compact grid. Prices revised to 1/4 of original- should mean writers can start using more significant weapons within 3/4 quality stories, but still need at least ten perfect stories for an RPG.
-Vehicles factored to 1/6 of original prices. These seem more reasonable but some people may disagree. Feedback is more than welcome, please do comment on things such as prices.
-Bonuses added back in due to previous "oversight"... I accidently removed them.
-Gangs redone into table format.
*** Update 2nd Jan ***
-aragond added to writers with link to his writer's profile. This single post links to his entire catalogue of stories and is a fantastic idea to help readers follow a story or catch up on anything they missed.
-BIG NEWS. The Ancelotti, Lupisella and Messina Families have been added! Plus, for a something quite refreshing, The Law now features as a 'gang', with properties all over Liberty City in the form of Police Stations; plus United Liberty Paper, as featured in the GTAIV storyline, for the darker side of law enforcement; aswell as City Hall for a political slant for the aspiring Aaron Sorkins out there. As a wild card, I have also added the Civilisation Committee, Liberty City's answer to the UN. Enjoy.
-Weapon and vehicle costs have been rounded to the nearest $5. Makes it easier for everyone.
-Bonuses reworded to "under or equal to" regarding awarding of items to avoid confusion.
*** Update 6th Jan ***
Okay, it's the 7th now, I know. I need to sleep more.
- Big change to post 2, redone with colors colours and formatting. Also, big change to the way staff does things. Clever Excel and clever macros means its only a one button press to update this stuff!
- BIG NEWS. TBOGT Weapons have been introduced. However, they come with a greater cost than regular weapons. This goes especially for the ultimate pimp-symbol, the Golden SMG .
** Update 11th Jan ***
- Staff has completed his tool for building Writer's Cards. Any active member should declare their legacy for it to be included at introduction of the new system.
This does not mean that if you don't do this before we start that you lose out. We can easily add you afterwards. However, Staff does not want to be responsible for trawling through each and every post and rating in this thread.
See Slingaa or aragond for hints on how to declare your previous stories.
- Sticky Bombs added Thanks for the reminder, Slingaa
** Update 7th Feb **
Rules 99% complete. Changes include:
Introduced a default vehicle for each gang. This gives a player something to start with, so that they aren't lost for anything to write about.
Also, introduced a rule that gives a new player, that is new to the game, not someone who changes gang a pistol. This means they can write something interesting in the first story and not just write crap so that they can afford something to start writing about.

Work Outstanding:
Drugs need finalising.
Active writers should tally up their number of posts, and their total earnings and PM them to Maverick.
Final review of the old system!

Build Up Your Gang
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#2032

Posted 29 December 2010 - 05:48 PM Edited by Build Up Your Gang, 07 February 2011 - 08:46 PM.

Rebranded for 2011!

user posted image
The Build Up Your Gang forum story game has been an icon in the GTAForum community for well over 5 years now. We are proud to present Build Up Your Gang once more. With the staggering success of BUYG in the San Andreas sub-forum, the BUYG Staff are proud to present BUYG: IV. Now that Grand Theft Auto has been well worn by sweaty palms, it’s only natural Build Up Your Gang be there for the creative and the dedicated.
The concept of this is not hard; you simply pick a gang and one of its areas. You then write stories for that gang and asset. You will receive $$$ for the stories you write. Remember, better stories means more $$$ (no one said length was a bad idea either).

We hope you’ll take part in the fun
Yours Truly
The BUYG Staff

BUYG Staff Members:
Aragond
Maverick24
Rucke
Colt M14
mark-2007
Masterkraft
skramz
vinnygorgeous
WelcomeToLibertyCity
___________________________________________________________________________________________________

HOW TO JOIN
Just post your first story, for which gang and at which location it is set, and when Staff get around to rating stories, your name will be added to the list of scorecards below.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________

About the new format... this time, it’s personal
With a New Year comes new joys and Build Up Your Gang IV is starting 2011 with a total revamp:
1. You can now write for up to five gangs.
Gone are slots and the need to find a space in a gang. If you want to write the for Gambettis, start writing for the Gambettis. Bored of the Gambettis and want to try the Irish Mob? Feel free, it’s all part of the game. Be mindful though, that a five gang limit is in place to promote better quality and assist with Staff’s work.
2. Likewise, your hard earned cash no longer belongs to a single gang. It’s yours for you to do as you wish, however and wherever you wish.
3. Properties are no longer reserved for a single writer.
4. All your information will now be collected in a single writer’s card . Scroll down or follow this link further information.
5. Each Gang has a starting vehicle. Plus, each new member starts with a pistol.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________

Rules for Build Up Your Gang: IV
General Rules & Guidelines
1You must not post more than one story in a 24 hour period.
2If you cannot come up with a complete thought please don't bother posting what you have at all. Just save it in notepad or word or something and come back with a complete story.[/i][/u]
3Please don't post half of a story and say you will be back to update it later as this can cause confusion to those that have to grade your stories.
4To make it easier on us please check your spelling and grammar carefully as it makes it harder for us to read and grade them with multiple errors.
5Please refrain from "flaming" other members as this will get this topic one of those neat, but unneeded, locks.
6Most importantly if you need any help or assistance with writing/brainstorming/developing stories or if you feel the need to comment on the thread then please contact me with your opinions/expressions/concerns/problems. In addition to this if you feel that rule 4 had been broken please contact us before taking any action yourself.
7NO DOUBLE POSTING, just edit your initial post.
8We the BUYG Staff reserve the right to ban you from the topic if you break any of the rules. No exceptions.
9Conversation is allowed in the topic. But refrain from going off topic.
10Please refrain from cluttering up the topic. Try and keep any questions regarding purchases, gang wars, cash, story count, etc. brief and avoid unnecessary discussion, preferably by keeping to PMs where possible.
Weapons & Vehicles
1Guns and vehicles are purchased from your total cash, not your earnings for a single gang.
2On joining a gang, you will have access to the gang's default vehicle.
3Additionally, on your first post as a writer, you have access to a pistol. This only applies to your first ever story and not on subsequent moves to another gang.
4You may only use the weapons you own for the gang you are writing for.
Own a Sub-Machine Gun for the Ancelottis and want to write about one for the Hillside Posse? You have to buy another for that gang.
Drugs
Coming soon…
These guidelines and rules have been brought to you by the BUYG Staff.

If you have any questions or problems regarding BUYG, in any of it's forms, then please contact Build Up Your Gang via PM.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________

Story Counts Bonuses
Story Amount
Prize(s)
Multiple of 5
For your 5th, 10th, 15th, 20th, etc. story, you get an extra $100.
10th story
Weapon or Item of your choice under or equal to $75
20th story
Vehicle of your choice under or equal to $100
50th story
Get any vehicle you want, except the Annihilator, for free.
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Lochie's guide to writing
You feel like writing? Well, this is the place for you then. Read below for some helpful advice and stuff.
1. Characters, locations and storylines: Develop your characters well, try to avoid using well-known characters from GTA IV as your main character, but instead make up your own. Its alot more fun and original, its okay to include characters from GTA IV, but just don't rely on them all the time, get creative. With locations, be certain you've got the scenery and street names down pat, try to avoid silly little mistakes. Plan your stories out and make sure you have a feel of the location. Storylines are easy, just try to avoid cliche's.
2. Spell Check:

Spell Check is vital, a bad story = less money and annoyed staff
QUOTE
mi nd niko split sum beers and herd dat wi had 2 go hit up demtri
niko: les go bust dis guy, he mess me round 2 long
me: yea niko lets go get or moni bk
so wi got in his car nd turnd da radyo on and boobed along 2 da musak as wi pulld up to alderney sttion where we herd demetri wud b dealing sum drugs. i see him and get outta da car, i check muh gun den run up 2 him
me: demetrei u owe us sum money foo!
nd i blssted his head off


That's just horrible, use MS word. If you've got a burning idea but can't finish it, save it in Notepad and come back to it later.

Build Up Your Gang
  • Build Up Your Gang

    Join BUYG Today!

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Mar 2008

#2033

Posted 29 December 2010 - 05:50 PM Edited by Build Up Your Gang, 07 February 2011 - 10:20 PM.


Gangs, Weapons and Vehicles

Use the following table to navigate through these sections:
Section
Part 1: Gangs
Part 2: Weapons
Part 3: Vehicles
___________________________________________________________________________________________________

Gangs
Pegorino Family The Gambetti Family
Properties: Properties:
Pegorino's Mansion Alderney Gravelli Mansion Broker
Honker's Alderney Al Dente's Dukes
Recycling Plant Alderney Come Clean (drycleaners) Broker
Garbage Disposal Inc. Algonquin Italian Bakery Dukes
Drusilla's Algonquin Leisure Centre Algonquin
Default Vehicle: Sentinel Default Vehicle: Sentinel
The Pavano Family The Ancelotti Family
Properties: Properties:
Auto Eroticar Alderney Waste Management Plant Algonquin
Industrial Dock Yard Bohan Fruit Markets Alderney
Marco's Tobacco & Beer Shop Algonquin Sprunk Factory Alderney
Default Vehicle: Sentinel Default Vehicle: Presidente
The Lupisella Family The Messina Family
Properties: Properties:
South Bohan Docks Bohan Pillows Club Dukes
Whiskers Club Bohan Opium Nights Algonquin
Construction Site Bohan Liberty Transport Authority Algonquin
Default Vehicle: PMP 600 Default Vehicle: Schafter
Albanian Mob Petrovic Bratva
Properties: Properties:
Platypus Broker Hove Beach Adult Shop Broker
Hardware Store Broker Cabaret Club Broker
Pill Pharmacy Bohan Comrades Broker
Deli Grocery Tobacco Shop Bohan 69th Street Diner Broker
Default Vehicle: Futo Kenny Petrovic's Mansion Alderney
Default Vehicle: Rebla
The Lost MC Irish Mob
Properties: Properties:
The Lost Clubhouse Alderney McReary Household Dukes
Ammunition Alderney Steinway Beer Garden Dukes
Meth Lab Alderney Lucky Winkles Bar Algonquin
Marty's Bikershop Alderney Default Vehicle: Vincent
Default Vehicle: Zombie
Hillside Posse Angels of Death
Properties: Properties:
Homebrew Cafe Dukes Beechwood Burger Shot Dukes
Real Badman's Apartment Complex Dukes Hi-Way Auto-Shop Dukes
Default Vehicle: Voodoo Angels of Death Clubhouse Algonquin
Navy Yard Broker
Default Vehicle: Hellfury
M.O.B. North Holland Hustlers
Properties: Properties:
Firefly Projects Crack Den Broker Dwayne's Apartment Algonquin
Native Engines Auto Parts Broker Playboy X's Loft Algonquin
Big Bad Al's Broker The Triangle Club Bohan
XXX Video Shop Broker Default Vehicle: Vigero
Rubin Swingers Basketball Courts Algonquin
Default Vehicle: Futo
Spanish Lords Torres Cartel
Properties: Properties:
Sprunk Warehouse Bohan Elizabeta's Apartment Bohan
Muscle Mary's Hotrods Auto-Shop Bohan Old Hospital Algonquin
South Bohan Projects Bohan Default Vehicle: Emperor
Default Vehicle: Primo
Korean Mob Triads
Properties: Properties:
Mr. Fuk's Rice Box Alderney Sum Yung Gai Dukes
Car Dealership Alderney Tattoo Parlour Dukes
Default Vehicle: PMP 600 Chinatown Arcade Algonquin
Underground Weapons Store Algonquin
Default Vehicle: Feroci
The Law
Properties:
Police Stations
United Liberty Paper Algonquin
Civilisation Committee (UN) Algonquin
City Hall Algonquin
Default Vehicle: Police Patrol
Return to contents

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Weapons
Melee Sub-Machine Guns Machine Guns Throwables
Knife$5 Micro-SMG$50 Assault Rifle$115 Pipebomb$15
Baseball Bat$5 SMG$90 Carbine Rifle$165 Molotovs$15
Pool Cue$5 Assault SMG$225 * Advanced MG$350 * Grenades$25
Gold SMG$1,000 * Sticky Bombs$225 *
Hand-Guns Shotguns Rifles Heavy Artillery
Pistol$25 Sawn-off Shotgun$65 Sniper Rifle$115 Grenade Launcher$150
Combat Pistol$40 Pump Shotgun$75 Combat Sniper$150 RPG$500
Pistol .44$100 * Combat Shotgun$100 Advanced Sniper$300 *
Assault Shotgun$125
Automatic Shotgun$200 *
* These weapons, featured in The Ballad of Gay Tony, come at a premium price.
Return to contents

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

Vehicles
CarsPriceCarsPriceCarsPriceCarsPriceCarsPrices
Admiral$75Esperanto$50Merit$65Sabre$65Voodoo$65
Banshee$150Faction$65Minivan$75Sabre GT$90Washington$75
Blista Compact$65Feltzer$100Moonbeam$85Schafter$70Willard$50
Bobcat$85Feroci$65Oracle$65Sentinel$100
Buccaneer$40Fortune$70Patriot$115Solair$85
Cavalcade$135Futo$60Perennial$75Stallion$75
Cavalcade FXT$110Habanero$85Peyote$50Stratum$75
Chavos$35Hakumai$90Pinnacle$75Stretch$165
Cognoscenti$125Huntley Sport$125PMP 600$115Sultan$85
Comet$235Infernus$250Premier$60Sultan RS$135
Contender$90Ingot$65Presidente$75Super GT$200
Coquette$150Intruder$85Primo$65Turismo$215
DF8-90$60Landstalker$100Rancher$100Uranus$75
Dilettante$85Lokus$60Rebla$85Vigero$90
Dukes$65Manana$40Romero$90Vincent$65
Emperor$60Marbelle$50Ruiner$85Virgo$60
Industrial/CommercialPriceEmergencyPricePublic ServicesPriceMotorcyclesPriceBoatsPrice
Airtug$20Ambulance$200Bus$85Faggio$15Dinghy$65
Benson$85Enforcer$500Cabby$40Freeway$75Jetmax$200
Biff$100FIB Buffalo$415Taxi$35Hellfury$85Marquis$250
Boxville$65Fire Truck$165Trashmaster$90NRG 900$150Predator$365
Burrito$60NOOSE Cruiser$250 PCJ 600$125Reefer$150
Flatbed$85NOOSE Patriot$265 Sanchez$60Squalo$185
Forklift$35Police Cruiser$235 Zombies$75Tropic$215
Mr. Tasty$35Police Patrol$215 Tug$50
Mule$75
Packer$115HelicoptersPrice
Phantom$110Annihilator$835
Pony$50Helitours Maverick$200
Ripley$85Maverick$200
Securicar$135Police Maverick$265
Speedo$45
Steed$75
Yankee$85
Return to contents

Build Up Your Gang
  • Build Up Your Gang

    Join BUYG Today!

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Mar 2008

#2034

Posted 29 December 2010 - 05:52 PM Edited by Build Up Your Gang, 11 January 2011 - 01:47 AM.


The Writers

MemberStory Count Money
Maverick24 17 $ 945
Slingaa 5 $ 276
Tyla 4 $ 200
aragond 17 $ 695
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Maverick24
Personal Writer Profile
GangIrish MobThe Pavano FamilyTotal
DetailsStory Count: 14
Active Property: None
Money Earned: $834
Money Spent: $0
Last Post: Aug 2 2010
Story Count: 3
Active Property: Auto Eroticar
Money Earned: $111
Money Spent: $0
Last Post: Jul 26 2010
Money: $945
Stories: 17
WeaponsBaseball Bat
Pistol
AK-47
Pistol
Shotgun
Sub Machinegun
VehiclesOracle Sentinel

Slingaa
Personal Writer Profile
GangThe Gambetti FamilyTotal
DetailsStory Count: 5
Active Property: Gravelli Mansion
Money Earned: $276
Money Spent: $0
Last Post: Oct 29 2009
Money: $276
Stories: 5
Weapons---
Vehicles---

Tyla
Personal Writer Profile
GangThe Pegorino FamilyThe Pavano FamilyThe Irish MobTotal
DetailsStory Count: 2
Active Property: ---
Money Earned: $101
Money Spent: $0
Last Post: Jul 6 2009
Story Count: 1
Active Property: ---
Money Earned: $50
Money Spent: $0
Last Post: Dec 24 2009
Story Count: 1
Active Property: The Lucky Winkles
Money Earned: $49
Money Spent: $0
Last Post: Sep 26 2010
Money: $200
Stories: 4
Weapons---------
Vehicles---------

aragond
Personal Writer Profile
GangThe Pegorino FamilyTotal
DetailsStory Count: 17
Active Property: Recycling Plant
Money Earned: $1,095
Money Spent: $400
Last Post: May 22 2010
Money: $695
Stories: 17
WeaponsCombat Shotgun
Combat Pistol
Vehicles---

Tycek
  • Tycek

    Being a bastard works.

  • The Yardies
  • Joined: 20 Jul 2009
  • Poland

#2035

Posted 29 December 2010 - 07:22 PM

Two questions:

When is the new BUYG starting?
Is it complete restart of the BUYG (Do I have to pick a gang and will I lost everything that was earned, bought to this point)?

Maverick24
  • Maverick24

    Crackhead

  • Members
  • Joined: 14 Jan 2010

#2036

Posted 29 December 2010 - 07:26 PM

QUOTE (Tycek @ Dec 29 2010, 19:22)
Two questions:

When is the new BUYG starting?
Is it complete restart of the BUYG (Do I have to pick a gang and will I lost everything that was earned, bought to this point)?

It's starting when it's ready. That's all I can say. I would like to say first few weeks of 2011.

I am not going to remove a single thing. All original material, including scores from the front page, will be preserved. I only ask that members take the time to submit their own scores to me to save Staff the job of scouring 102 pages of material whilst doing 300 other things.

If anyone is concerned that posting now might mean they are overlooked in some strange no-man's land between systems, then please: don't worry and carry on as normal. Rating should continue unaffected and transition cleanly over to the new system.

TheLostBiker
  • TheLostBiker

    DJ WildLost

  • Members
  • Joined: 29 Dec 2010

#2037

Posted 30 December 2010 - 12:01 AM

QUOTE (Maverick24 @ Dec 29 2010, 19:26)
QUOTE (Tycek @ Dec 29 2010, 19:22)
Two questions:

When is the new BUYG starting?
Is it complete restart of the BUYG (Do I have to pick a gang and will I lost everything that was earned, bought to this point)?

It's starting when it's ready. That's all I can say. I would like to say first few weeks of 2011.

I am not going to remove a single thing. All original material, including scores from the front page, will be preserved. I only ask that members take the time to submit their own scores to me to save Staff the job of scouring 102 pages of material whilst doing 300 other things.

If anyone is concerned that posting now might mean they are overlooked in some strange no-man's land between systems, then please: don't worry and carry on as normal. Rating should continue unaffected and transition cleanly over to the new system.

This answers my question, but y'all still ignored me sad.gif .

Anywho, Im with the Triads, have the SMG and Knife, and no earnings as i haven't made any stories yet. I'll work on the first over the next day or two.

Slingaa
  • Slingaa

    Unbowed, unbent, unbroken.

  • Members
  • Joined: 19 Sep 2009

#2038

Posted 30 December 2010 - 04:04 PM

Noticied I'm on the purge list, but I've stated a few times I want to stay. I'll be moving to the Messina Family when they're put up though. I've sent this to Maverick, but I'll post it here anyway.

Chapter 1 earned $20.
Chapter 2 earned $24.
Chapter 3 earned $42.
Chapter 4 earned $48.
Chapter 5 earned $42.

TheLostBiker
  • TheLostBiker

    DJ WildLost

  • Members
  • Joined: 29 Dec 2010

#2039

Posted 30 December 2010 - 08:24 PM

I had 3 pages of Triads. Read the Revamp. Noticed i could get on the lost and was like, "OH hell no." But i'll post my Triad story and stick with them now biggrin.gif

TheLostBiker
  • TheLostBiker

    DJ WildLost

  • Members
  • Joined: 29 Dec 2010

#2040

Posted 31 December 2010 - 05:23 AM Edited by TheLostBiker, 31 December 2010 - 05:34 AM.

Meet the Bosses

user posted image

“Screw this boat!” Niko Screamed with a passion.
“Man Chill the hell out” I replied
“No, Marcus! You shut the hell up, or I’ll cut out your throat! You F*cking Prick” Niko screamed violently,
“Niko, I’m tired of this boat too. I’ve been looking for work, and have come to this godforsaken country in search for it. Now, I’m not screaming like a child, am I?” I replied
“No, but if you continue to mock me, You’ll be swimming to shore. Your just lucky my cousin is going to pick both of us, Prick.” He flipped me off, before sitting down.
“Hey! Both of you shut the f*ck up!” The Driver yelled.
“Sorry! I don’t speak prick” Niko muttered, luckily for him, the driver didn’t hear it.

“So, what’s your big money cousins name?” I sat down next to Niko, pulling out a cigarette.
“Roman. He has more women, Cars, and luxury then you’ll ever have. Prick.” He flipped me off.
“Listen pal, this is hard on me too. You think I like sitting in this boat? But I’ve heard about this little deal you had going on back in what ever mother f*cking country you came from, and I’ll tell everyone.” I screamed, pissed.

“F*ck you!” He said, kicking me off the side of the boat. Clinging back on, pulling myself up, I flipped him off only to get the unsatisfying grin of his, “Anyway, Marcus, what is your background huh? Selling women to..oh wait.. You’ll never get a woman.” He grinned once more

“Well I’m an American citizen, Born there. No, I’m not happy about it either.
many years as a doctor, before a horribly gone wrong accident caused me to leave.” I chuckled, “Accident in the loosest meaning of the term, that is. Besides this ‘deal’, What’s up with you Niko?”

“Well, I came here to get away from that ‘deal’ and to live the American dream, much like my cousin, Roman. My English is better than his too,” He laughed, “You have an accent. Are you sure you were born here?”

“Yes, I spent much time in Ireland with my family. They betrayed me. Many of them live here, you know. Might get some payback.” I smiled, enjoying his company for the first time.

“Well, we’re almost there. One last question, you got any work yet?” He smiled back, non-homo, though.

“Yes, Some Triad leader named, Hsin Jaoming, contacted me on my cell phone earlier before we got on this boat. Wants me to join the ranks. Should be fun, if I don’t F*ck up that is.” I laughed, “He does deals for the AOD, and some others. I like bikers, so this could be a way in.”
“Well, buddy, here’s my cousin. Let’s go.” Niko hopped up, then I did the same, making our way towards a parked four-door car.
“Cousin!” Roman hugged him, “Who’s this?”
“A friend of mine, Roman. We may need him.” Niko replied before me, as me and Roman shook hands politely, before he piped up.
“Well, c’mon. The cars ready.” He seemed nice.
“Cousin, this isn’t exactly a top-notch car” Niko mentioned, and when I began to think about it, he was right. This car blew, for lack of a better term. It was about nine thousand, which isn’t exactly, “Sports car” Mentality.

“About that,” Roman smiled weirdly, “I lied. I just wanted you to come help me out, Ok Cousin? I’m sorry.”
“Urgh!” Niko screamed, “Take us to Marcus’ place before I scream”
“Its in Algonquin, Roman.” I laughed, “Near Perseus, it’s a Penthouse”

After about ten minutes of listening to Death metal, which I might add is awful, we arrived. I got out, went inside and took a nice long look. I began to change out of my clothes, tossing them out of the bed. I put on a nice black suit, from Perseus, and black sneakers, as I had nothing else. I put on my glasses as to conceal my identity, then moved out of the penthouse, and back to the streets.

“Taxi!” I called while whistling, as it pulled over, I got in.
“Where to?” The driver asked
“The Burger shot in industrial,” I returned, hungry. My cell phone began to ring about halfway through the drive,

“Hello?” I asked
“This is Hsin Jaoming, meet me at burger shot in industrial.” He replied,

As we arrived I walked in, greeted by a waving clerk, then a sitting man. As I sat next to Hsin Jaoming, I noticed he was stuffing himself and was quite fat.

“Hello, I am Hsin Jaoming. I would like to induct you into the Triads.” He smiled, shaking my hand.
“Well, Ok. But only if you stop stuffing yourself.” I laughed
“Shove it, Asshole.” He winked, “To be inducted you must pass a test. Check the ‘Register’ and meet me back at the triad HQ in northern Algonquin.” He winked again
“Ok.” He handed me a micro-SMG under the table, and I stood up.

“Everyone down! This is a hold-up! Move and you die!” I screamed at the top of my lungs.
“Holy sh*t!” was screamed by multiple people, while the entire food joint hit the ground. I approached the register, gun drawn.
“Put the money in this sock, or die!” I screamed. My cell phone began to ring.
“Hello? I’m kind of busy here, idiot.” The caller ID was “Unknown Caller”
“No. Screw you. You are Marcus Lopez, Correct? Six foot two, Brown, Resemblance to Luis Lopez?” He asked.
“Yeah. We’re twins. We’re related, basically.” I replied, “Wait, Who are you?”
“Not important. Your brother is in terms with the Triads, and he’s in Liberty. He’s coming to you. Good luck.” He laughed Sadistically.

“Alright! Everyone in here, you saw nothing! You hear me? Nothing!” I screamed, running out.
I bumped into Luis.
“Brother? Is it really you?” He asked, taking my mask off.
“Oyez, Yes. But we need to go. Now is not the time.” I said, noticing a motorcycle, and shooting it with my micro-SMG. “We can catch up on the ride.”

As he boarded, he told me some things. Like how he had been working for Gay Tony, and now he joined the Triads with the news I had. He told me about how he’d be working with me, and that the Triad boss wanted to see us both.

Then we talked. Not about a lot, just about how we had been, what we had been up to, and how many women we’d been with. My number wasn’t impressively high like his, but still. It was fun catching up with him.
Then he said something I hated so much.

“We are going to see Hsin Jaoming. He wants us to use our Micro-SMGS to get some stolen drugs back, but he’s sending some boys to help us. Our narcotics customer, the AoD.” He said, scaring me.
“Let’s go see him.” I sighed.

We pulled up to Hsin Jaoming’s house. He was looking out the window, holding a knife up. He appeared high, but I wasn’t sure.

“Boss!” Luis said knocking on the door. “Get the f*cking door open!”
“Coming!” He screamed back, throwing the knife out the window, hitting some prick behind us.
He opened the door, gave us a disgusted look, then said, “Did you know you were followed?”
“We weren’t aware.” I said.
“I didn’t know either.” Luis threw in.
“Well you were. Ignorant pricks could have gotten us killed. Now listen, some random thugs stole the AoD drugs last week. You know they weren’t to happy and they’ll assist you two in getting them back. You guys know the medicine drugs we had stolen a while back?” He asked.
“At the depot in Bohan?” Luis asked.
“That’s the one.” Hsin replied, “I want you to go kill these pricks. If we get anymore narcotics stolen, its your head their on. Not mine. Luis, You’ll also be in charge of your brother Marcus. Don’t show special feelings toward him in this time of gang crisis, or I’ll have your head.” He sighed, returning to his drugs. As he did that, we made our way out and back onto the motorcycle, where Luis offered to drive. “I know this town better than you, and besides, you weren’t around when the Depot drugs were robbed.”

“Fair enough. Our boss seems like a grade A prick though. I’d met him before, but he was a lot nice then.” I mentioned.
“He’s been nervous since the robbery. Cops have been following his employers, and his employers have been following him. He don’t trust anyone with anything. Either way he was a prick, but only a grade B.” Luis laughed, and I did too.

“So, this things in Bohan. How many of the thugs are there going to be, and what gang do they belong to?” I asked
“They aren’t in a gang. But there’s about fifty. We have the AoD, and we have around one hundred. Should be fun. Here’s your Micro-SMG. Fully loaded. The AoD are packing the same heat.” He winked.

“I’m not too good with guns.” I stuttered, “Well, Not anymore.”
“I am.” Luis laughed
“Cool.” I muttered.
We arrived in Bohan, and parked outside the Depot. The AoD Pulled up, and offered tons of ammo. “Our boys stole it from the lost. Have at it.” One of their leaders mentioned.
The Place was empty as we all walked in. Luis pulled me aside and we came back out.
“What?” I asked
“Hold on. I heard some sort of beeping coming from-” He never finished. There was a huge explosion. Most of the AoD were in there! The battle had begun.

To be continued...

Please note any grammar mistakes while Marcus is talking is due to the fact he went to ireland to track down some people whom betrayed him, only to be betrayed himself.
He has relations to The Lopez and Mcreary' families, Lopez= His twin brother, whos mom married the mcrearys late dad a long time ago. Packie and Luis both hated their dad's so it plays out well.

Also, This is for the underground weapons store in algonquin. And since Jacky hasn't posted since nov 26, Im pretty sure i can take it over due to his inactivity. I'll use it in the re-brand too.




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