Quantcast

Jump to content

» «
Photo

BUYG: Build Up Your Gang IV

2,323 replies to this topic
aragond
  • aragond

    We are the Aragond. We will bury you.

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Aug 2007
  • None

#1051

Posted 16 June 2009 - 05:46 PM Edited by aragond, 19 July 2009 - 10:25 AM.

Review previous scene
user posted image

Episode One, Part Two

Tires squealed as the car cornered into the yard. A cloud of dust rose in the air and stones kicked up as the car slid on the stone-covered dirt to a stop. In the distance, sirens screamed as though in frustration at the disappearance of their quarry. And from the dull-green two-door Buccaneer three youths emerged in adrenalin-fueled fits of laughter and excited congratulations.

"Man, the way you shot the car between those two cops, JJ," said the youth in the black leather jacket, slapping his friend on the shoulder, "that was some f*ckin' awesome skills!"

"F*ckin' awesome, man. Truly," added the second non-driver struggling to exit the car from the back seat.

"Hey, Jay-Jay, that was some awesome sh*t back there. Or so I hear."

None of the three had paid the slightest attention to the two black-besuited men standing fifteen feet from where the car stopped. Too caught-up in their excitement to notice the shorter one with the intense-purple shirt, who they would ordinarily have joked looked like an extra from a "Miami Vice" set, tell his Whiz Wireless mobile phone, "Yeah, they just pulled in now. Ya did good, Vinny," before hanging up. But, it was "Miami Vice" that called out for them to notice him now.

"Uh, thanks," JJ replied with uncharacteristic uncertainty. "Who the f*ck are you?"

"Who the f*ck am I?" Miami turned to his Schwartzenegger-sized colleague and says with an insulting chuckle, "'Who the f*ck am I,' he said." His colleague cracks a slight smile.

"I'm your f*ckin' Grandmother, that's who," he aggressively quipped back, smiling with self-satisfaction.

JJ's expression turned to an indignant sneer. Half-turning to the leather jacket, he said at low-volume, "Mikey, check this Goomba." Without hesitation, Mikey strode in front of the car between his friends and the Miami Vice extra.

"Yeah, well, it's past your bedtime, Grandma," he uttered with his hand towering over the smaller man, his fingers forming into a pistol, 'gangsta-style'. With a dismissive flick of his wrist, he added, "So, why don't you go scoot yourself home."

Unintimidated, the extra retorts with almost mild amusement. "Ah, f*ckin' funny guy." Pleased with himself, Mikey turned to his friends with a cocky smile. "Well, I got a joke for ya," the extra added.

"How funny is this?"

Mikey had barely turned back to face the 'Goomba' when he felt his legs kicked out from under his tall, thin frame and to his right, which allowed gravity to pull his head into a free-fall collision with the car's hood. With perfect precision and timing, the Goomba helped Mikey's head slam with maximum velocity straight into the soft metal of the hood to make a loud, grimace-inducing bang.

The effect on the three young men was instantaneous and arresting.

"F*ck! What the f*ck was that?!" JJ shouted as he knelt down to attend to his friend, collapsed on the ground, moaning and holding his neck and head.

Miami Vice beamed, rather pleased with himself, turning to his colleague with a slight smile. He had their attention. Unbowed, JJ turned to his other friend. "Double-T, get Frankie and Jimmy over here with my shotgun."

Double-T would have turned and shouted to the two guys fifty yards away stripping a car, whose attention had already been won by the loud bang of cranium on metal, were it not for the larger gentlemen raising his arm to his side to show them the sawn-off shotgun held unthreateningly in his large hand.

"Oh, you mean this gun?" Miami said, gesturing back at his colleague's raised arm without looking behind him. "What?" he said in mock-surprise. "You didn't really think you'd hidden it?"

The pair were like a choreographed ballet, each knowing the other's exact movements without even needing to look. And that realisation informed Double-T instantly who they were dealing with.

"Oh, f*ck! You're Joel and Slugger," he said, taking two or three stumbling steps in retreat.

"Hey!" Joel shouted, pointing at Double-T threateningly. "That's Mister Lipari to you little f*cks." Pointing to his colleague, he adds, "And he's Mister Scarcarell."

Mikey regained consciousness with a moan, and bloodily spat words, "You f*ckin' cocksucker."

"Oh, f*ck, guys," Double-T warned, shifting nervously between running for dear-life and loyalty to his friends. "These are f*ckin' Pegorino mobsters."

"They're f*ckin' dead men," Mikey retorted as he staggered to his feet with JJ's help and sat on the hood, dabbing his bloodied head.

"What? You still want a piece of me, kid?" Joel replied, jutting forward his chest.

Mikey's head wasn't yet clear enough to put the little maggot out of his misery, so he decided to listen. "What the f*ck do you want?"

"Ah, look at this, Slugger," Joel said, gesturing to his colleague still standing silently behind him. "I finally got his attention.

"You little rats have been operating on my turf, running this little operation, pulling all this heat on my people, and I don't see dime-one of any of it?"

"What f*ckin' operation?" Mikey said with dismissive exasperation.

"'What operation?' he says," Joel muttered, half-turning to Slugger. As he turned back to Mikey and JJ, his face displayed scowling displeasure.

"This!!" he shouted, slamming his palm on the car. "You cocky piece o' sh*t!

"Or did you think Dorothy Wilkins, 73, of 1487 Aspdin Drive wants her car cut up for parts and sold for her?"

Mikey and JJ's jaws dropped. The Goomba knew exactly where they stole the car from. "What the f*ck?" and "How do you know that?" dropped from their lips in astonishment. "You cops?" Mikey, feeling better, concluded. Double-T tried to repeat that these were mobsters, but, again, Joel cut-in on his words.

"F*ckin'... this kid." he mumbles to Slugger. "NO, WE AINT COPS!" he screamed. "We're the guys who are gonna keep them off your backs, you dumb f*ck!" Veins popping in his neck, Joel spun around and paced back and forth to cool his exasperation.

Double-T tentatively speaks up. "So, who would we be working for?"

"You'd be working for me, get it? For me," Joel said emphatically, slapping his chest. "Slugger here will come once a week and collect one G'...-" Joel's speech was immediately interrupted by JJ and Mikey's scoffing protests.

"That's all we make a week," Mikey said, standing defiantly.

"Then," Joel responded, patiently, "you'd better scale-up the scope of your operation."

Mikey screwed up his face in disgust. "You know what," he said. "Screw you, you guinea f*ckin' nutcase. We aint workin' for f*ckin' nobody." While Double-T felt his whole body tense, even JJ briefly pondered the wisdom of pissing off the guinea nutcase and his towering colleague holding their shotgun.

But, Mikey wasn't even done. "Now, get the f*ck outa here before we drop your bodies in the f*ckin' West river." He then turned his attention to the two guys now half-way between the car they had been working on, and the five guys gathered around the faded-green Buccaneer. The words he would have uttered would have been: "Frankie, Jimmy, dispose of this smelly sh*t."

Instead, Joel, a pinch disappointed, shrugged the words: "Okay, kid, you wanna dance, let's dance."

With Mikey's head turned to his right, looking to Jimmy and Frankie, Joel's fist connected with the back-left of his jaw, instantly dislocating it. As the pain centres of Mikey's brain lit-up like the fourth of July, his head lead his body in a falling-swing around to the right, which meant Joel's next punch landed squarely in his left kidney, and his kick took Mikey's knee from under him.

Crumpling in a bloodied, pain-wracked mess onto the hood, and then sliding, face-first onto the ground, Mikey probably never felt the blows that followed, as Joel let his feet do the talking. Leaning on the car's hood for balance, Joel proceeded to kick Mikey repeatedly in the side until his body just flopped limply over.

Frankie and Jimmy needed no encouragement to help. While JJ just stood there, stunned into inaction by the intensity of violence being inflicted on his friend's unconscious corpse, Frankie and Jimmy flicked out their switch-blades and ran toward Joel who continued looking down at the body he kicked beneath him. But, neither of them got close enough to slide their blades into Mikey's vicious attacker, for Slugger, with cat-like grace, dropped the shotgun and drew a pistol from his coat and had it trained on their heads before they got within ten feet.

"Alright! Alright!" Double-T screamed in desperation. "He's had enough!"

At that, Joel emerged from a violent trance to notice the blood all over his shoes. While the disfigured, now-purple and black-skinned Mikey, blood and teeth oozing slowly from his mouth, lay at his feet, Joel's concern was firmly fixed on his shoes, complaining he'd now have to change them before the funeral.

"You f*ckin' maniac, look what you've done. Get the f*ck outa here," JJ screamed at Joel, kneeling down at Mikey's back.

"Yeah," Joel casually agreed. "Okay, kid. Sure."

Slugger's gun remained trained on Jimmy's head, as Joel leaned his foot on the hood of the car and wiped the blood from it, then turned to face Double-T.

"Alright, you seem to be the smart one, so you're gonna be responsible for handing over two thou' a week to my associate here," he said, casually doubling the amount. "No excuses. No negotiations. Or, I come back and finish the job," he said, gesturing at Mikey.

Double-T's gaze wandered back and forth between Mikey as JJ tried to roll him over, and the psychopath whose gaze was firmly fixed on him.

"Hey! Hey!" Joel yelled, snapping his fingers to break Double-T's trance. "You listening, smart guy?"

"Yeah, sure, man. Two thousand. You got it."

"Oh, now you see, Mister Scarcarell?" Joel said to Slugger in mock-surprise and faux-class. "Here you were demeaning the youth of today, and yet here we have a model citizen."

"Yeah," Scarcarell said, grunting his first words of the morning. "F*ckin' amazing."

As the pair began effecting their departure along the side of the car, Slugger's gun still firmly fixed on Jimmy's head, Frankie gained his voice. "What the f*ck, T? How we gonna make two thousand?" he protested, looking at Double-T.

"I suggest you get busy, boys," Joel advised, before he and Slugger turned and gently jogged out the front gate of the car yard.

As the guineas receded into the distance, Joel complaining, once more, about having to change his shoes before the funeral, the four guys stood over Mikey's broken body. They wondered whether he would live. They wondered whether they could really make enough to pay the mobsters two thousand a week. And then a cold sweat broke over Jimmy's skin.

"Oh, f*ck," he said with a genuine quake in his voice.

JJ looked back. "What now?"

Jimmy, with the attention of the three other guys firmly fixed on him, expressed his new fear. "What the f*ck are we gonna tell Mikey's Uncle Patrick?" The fear shared, cold sweats began breaking out on all four of the guys as the stared fearfully at Mikey's bruised and battered frame.

I am genuinely interested in feedback. If you'd prefer not to clog the thread, feel free to PM instead.
Note to staff: since these five young guys running a chop-shop are not Pegorino members (at best, they will be repeated as mere associates) and these items were not explicitly used by the Family, I hope you will regard my reference to the un-utilised shotgun and the Buccaneer the kids drove in with as mere third-party props having nothing to do with my gang's operations and thus not an infringement of the rules. It would seem untidy at best to have to twist the story and have Mrs Wilkins driving a Sentinel.
This version is slightly altered from what was first here. I've fixed a few of the tense problems. I have trouble staying in the past tense 'cuz the story's appearing before me "now" as I write it.

This chapter earned $49 and the comment "the dialogue and descriptive parts were both equally strong, providing an excellent story using a large variety of different words. Very well done, and I look forward to reading more."
It was also praised by one participant-reviewer, Tyla, with the words "... good ... authentic ... intensely descriptive ..."

View next scene

ScratchCard
  • ScratchCard

    Arc.

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Mar 2009

#1052

Posted 16 June 2009 - 07:37 PM

Oh crap.. my character drives a red Sabre, but it's not owned by the Albanians. In fact, it isn't even on the car list. Is it okay for me to use it anyway?

Tyla
  • Tyla

    Vice Cat

  • Members
  • Joined: 12 Feb 2007
  • Australia

#1053

Posted 16 June 2009 - 07:58 PM

I really liked your story, Aragond. The description was good, the dialogue was authentic, and I especially liked the character of Miami Vice aka Joel. I can almost picture his player model in game. The interaction between him and his heavy Scarcarelli "Who am I?" you can almost picture him turning around to his colleague with disgust, just like those "OH!" moments out of The Soprano's. They meant business. Joel is everything Vincenzo Cilli wanted to be in Liberty City Stories. My favorite parts were the brawls, both at the start and the finish, each one was intensely descriptive, especially the injuries inflicted to Mikey.

I really want to join the Pegorino's now, especially now I'm over the writers block. But I'm waiting on the Ancelotti's being added. Any idea when they are coming about, anyone?

Rucke
  • Rucke

    Gangsta

  • Members
  • Joined: 01 Aug 2007

#1054

Posted 16 June 2009 - 09:50 PM

QUOTE (ScratchCard @ Jun 16 2009, 20:37)
Oh crap.. my character drives a red Sabre, but it's not owned by the Albanians. In fact, it isn't even on the car list. Is it okay for me to use it anyway?

No actually not. But since you was kind enough to tell me I won't charge you with anything. However, you're not allowed to use the Sabre anymore. You can buy it if you like.

StrappedEnd
  • StrappedEnd

    Joint Operations 2nd Commader

  • BUSTED!
  • Joined: 26 Apr 2008

#1055

Posted 17 June 2009 - 07:00 AM Edited by StrappedEnd, 18 June 2009 - 12:42 AM.

North Holland Hustlers
Chapter 4: Life Part 2


As I sat quietly in that dark cell thoughts ran through my mind. Thoughts of De'Vonn and my Mom coming to visit me in jail. Thoughts of what the Hustlers are planning to do with me and what the police will do with them. I testified against the Hustlers just to have the D.A. not hold up his end of the bargain and give me fifteen years, instead im searving 30 years without a chance of parole. Life sucks. Period.

You know the stories they say about prison life, well its true, 100% true.

"What are you thinking 'bout boy" asked my cell mate, Tayshaun Johnson.

"My family" I answered back without emotion.

"Yeah? Got a wife?" Tayshaun wondered.

"No. I had a Mom and a little brother" I told him

"What happened to them?" he questioned

"Mom died in a botched bank robbery a year ago and my little brother died about ten months ago" I said with a tear in the corner of my eye.

" Oh, sorry man. I didn't know." Tayshaun answered.

Tayshaun was in for life without parole for the murder of a dirty cop. I've had runins in the field, I got the sh*t kicked out of me and was in the infirmary for a month. I've been through a lot of crap and now I'm here probably about to get shanked because Danny Granger called in a favor. Probably. Ha more like definative.

Three months into my prison sentance sure enough in the prison yard I got shanked by a hispanic guy who yelled out Spanish Lords. It wasn't good at all. I thought I could make it through my time in Aldernay State Correctional Facility. However, I didn't intend for it to be in a body bag on its way to the morgue.

And here I stand at the pearly gates begging to be let in on my Judgement day. I see my Mom and De'Vonn on the otherside talking to my Dad. In a swift moment I find myself in hell all over again. Searing heat and pain on every sqaure inch of my body.

TO BE CONTINUED....

mrpain
  • mrpain

    wub wub

  • Members
  • Joined: 15 Dec 2008

#1056

Posted 17 June 2009 - 11:08 AM

QUOTE (Colt M14 @ Jun 16 2009, 14:07)
QUOTE (evog @ Jun 16 2009, 13:29)
Before I write my first chapter for the M.O.B., I have a few questions:

First Question: Who's the leader?

Second: Is it alright if I make up a few things about the gang; like there's many "divisions" (drug dealers etc.), they're allies with some of the other gangs, etc.?

Help is appreciated; thanks to whoever helps me out!  colgate.gif

I was in the MOB previously and I THINK I could give you some tips.

-A member from the single player was known as "Jermaine" He was used in another story and killed off a while back. You COULD use him as one of your characters though.

-The gang is black.

-They wear re and blue hoodies.

-They are rumored to be the Broker version of NHH.

-You should make your own main characters and side characters aswell.

-Make yourself start off as a nobody and go up to the leader. Or maybe the other way around?

-The MOB usually deal drugs around Firefly Projects and Outlook park. (Seen them In Game.)

-Use the weapons and vehicles available to The MOB. You're lucky, MrPain and I bought MANY vehicles and weapons back in the day.

-Buy and sell drugs as a source of money after your 5 first stories.

That's about all I can say for the moment. Good luck with the Money Over Bitches/bullsh*t(either one.)

Good ol' Jermaine. He was one of my characters in my previous stories.


To evog, if you need any help with the M.O.B, just PM me. I had some experience with them

ScratchCard
  • ScratchCard

    Arc.

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Mar 2009

#1057

Posted 17 June 2009 - 02:01 PM

Well I would buy it but the Albanians lack $6 dollars. I'll just leave the car out of my next story and buy it after that.

ScratchCard
  • ScratchCard

    Arc.

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Mar 2009

#1058

Posted 17 June 2009 - 02:26 PM Edited by ScratchCard, 03 October 2009 - 01:18 PM.

user posted image

Rucke
  • Rucke

    Gangsta

  • Members
  • Joined: 01 Aug 2007

#1059

Posted 17 June 2009 - 08:21 PM

Writing for the Spanish Lords wasn't really my thing. I will switch back to the Pegorino Crime Family. However, I will add a complete new storyline with complete new characters.

liam.
  • liam.

    Non-Stop Pop FM & Mirror Park Radio <3

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Nov 2001

#1060

Posted 17 June 2009 - 10:10 PM Edited by evog, 20 June 2009 - 09:34 PM.

Edited, I'm just gonna write 5 stories & switch over.

Osric
  • Osric

    In The Name Of The Moon

  • Members
  • Joined: 12 Apr 2009

#1061

Posted 18 June 2009 - 03:16 AM

I would like to buy a combat pistol for the Petrovics.

aragond
  • aragond

    We are the Aragond. We will bury you.

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Aug 2007
  • None

#1062

Posted 18 June 2009 - 04:28 AM

QUOTE (Tyla @ Jun 17 2009, 05:58)
I really liked your story, Aragond. The description was good, the dialogue was authentic, and I especially liked the character of Miami Vice aka Joel. I can almost picture his player model in game. The interaction between him and his heavy Scarcarelli "Who am I?" you can almost picture him turning around to his colleague with disgust, just like those "OH!" moments out of The Soprano's. They meant business. Joel is everything Vincenzo Cilli wanted to be in Liberty City Stories. My favorite parts were the brawls, both at the start and the finish, each one was intensely descriptive, especially the injuries inflicted to Mikey.

Wow! Thank you, Tyla! ... good ... authentic ... intensely descriptive ... Well, they're some adjectives I'll gladly take! smile.gif And I appreciate you taking the time to write a detailed assessment of what you liked, what was appealling and what seemed believeable. It really is immeasurably helpful to know that, allows me to use the same in future.

That said, I don't want to discourage negative comments. I am kinda seeking to improve what doesn't work. I mean, it won't get $54* from the staff (or WILL it???? smile.gif icon14.gif tounge2.gif ), so there must be something I didn't do perfectly. That said, don't flood me with critiques, I'm not blessed with a Joel-sized ego. wink.gif

* I think it's the most I've ever seen handed out.

ScratchCard
  • ScratchCard

    Arc.

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Mar 2009

#1063

Posted 18 June 2009 - 01:17 PM

QUOTE (evog @ Jun 17 2009, 22:10)
Info: believed to be an affiliate of the African American gang "Money Over Bullsh*t". Lives in Firefly Projects, Broker, Liberty City.

The actual name of the gang is 'Money over Bitches', don't know if you intended to say bullsh*t though.

ScratchCard
  • ScratchCard

    Arc.

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Mar 2009

#1064

Posted 18 June 2009 - 04:08 PM Edited by ScratchCard, 03 October 2009 - 01:19 PM.

user posted image

liam.
  • liam.

    Non-Stop Pop FM & Mirror Park Radio <3

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Nov 2001

#1065

Posted 18 June 2009 - 04:58 PM

QUOTE (ScratchCard @ Jun 18 2009, 05:17)
QUOTE (evog @ Jun 17 2009, 22:10)
Info: believed to be an affiliate of the African American gang "Money Over Bullsh*t". Lives in Firefly Projects, Broker, Liberty City.

The actual name of the gang is 'Money over Bitches', don't know if you intended to say bullsh*t though.

Actually, GTA IV Wikia says that you can hear some members asking, "Is the B for b*tches or bullsh"*t?" I don't think anyone would put a lie like that up there, so I'm using bullsh*t.

ScratchCard
  • ScratchCard

    Arc.

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Mar 2009

#1066

Posted 18 June 2009 - 05:06 PM

Well it's your choice ofcourse.

Colt M14
  • Colt M14

    BUYGIV: Spanish Lords

  • Members
  • Joined: 28 Feb 2009

#1067

Posted 18 June 2009 - 09:52 PM

QUOTE (evog @ Jun 19 2009, 03:58)
QUOTE (ScratchCard @ Jun 18 2009, 05:17)
QUOTE (evog @ Jun 17 2009, 22:10)
Info: believed to be an affiliate of the African American gang "Money Over Bullsh*t". Lives in Firefly Projects, Broker, Liberty City.

The actual name of the gang is 'Money over Bitches', don't know if you intended to say bullsh*t though.

Actually, GTA IV Wikia says that you can hear some members asking, "Is the B for b*tches or bullsh"*t?" I don't think anyone would put a lie like that up there, so I'm using bullsh*t.

Yeah It's actually both. MrPain and I called it Money Over Bitches, But Bullsh*t is fine.

liam.
  • liam.

    Non-Stop Pop FM & Mirror Park Radio <3

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Nov 2001

#1068

Posted 18 June 2009 - 11:08 PM

QUOTE (Colt M14 @ Jun 18 2009, 13:52)
QUOTE (evog @ Jun 19 2009, 03:58)
QUOTE (ScratchCard @ Jun 18 2009, 05:17)
QUOTE (evog @ Jun 17 2009, 22:10)
Info: believed to be an affiliate of the African American gang "Money Over Bullsh*t". Lives in Firefly Projects, Broker, Liberty City.

The actual name of the gang is 'Money over Bitches', don't know if you intended to say bullsh*t though.

Actually, GTA IV Wikia says that you can hear some members asking, "Is the B for b*tches or bullsh"*t?" I don't think anyone would put a lie like that up there, so I'm using bullsh*t.

Yeah It's actually both. MrPain and I called it Money Over Bitches, But Bullsh*t is fine.

icon14.gif Very nice.

Sorry I haven't posted my story yet, I'm just a slow writer. I promise to have it up within the next two days, though.

Rucke
  • Rucke

    Gangsta

  • Members
  • Joined: 01 Aug 2007

#1069

Posted 19 June 2009 - 03:28 PM

Pegorino Crime Family
Chapter 1: Made out of garbage

Mike Donatello was crawling around on the floor. I kicked him in the stomach one more time. Blood came out between his fat lips and he started to cry. I pulled up my gun, a nice Smith and Wesson I bought as a Christmas present for me self last year. I felt the weight of the weapon. I loved holding it and pointing it at thing. Especially living things. Mike Donatello was an arrogant prick, even so arrogant that he thought he would get away with being an FBI informant. I enjoyed watching his fat body crawling around at the floor, and I knew I would enjoy it even more when I had pumped a couple of bullets into him. I raised my gun, ready to pull the trigger.

"I'm sorry Mike, but I never liked you." I said as I pulled the trigger. The bullet went right into Mike's stomach. I pulled the trigger again, then again, and again. When I was done I watched the red blood trickle in the springs of the floor. I left the room and walked back outside. We were at some small abandoned house in the woods of Alderney. Pete and Danny Boy had kept the engine of the car running while I was inside and dealt with fat Mike. I pulled up a cigarette and my lighter. When I had lighted the cig I got inside the backseat of Pete's car. He drove a nice old dark grey Emperor with fine leather seats.
"You took care of our little problem?" Pete asked, and I responded with a simple nod. "Alright then, let's get you made." Pete said as we headed away.

My name was Gino Fragelli, a 34 year old associate in the Pegorino Crime Family. Right now I was heading up in the world because you see, killing fat Mike Donatello was my entry ticket into the family. Today I was going to get made into the family. Being made meant that you really got accepted into a family, it meant that you were somebody reliable, somebody you could trust, somebody that get things done. The guys I were in the car with was Peter "Pete" DiMaria and Daniel "Danny Boy" Filippo.
Pete was the capo of the crew I was being made into, called the DiMaria crew. A crew was a smalltime gang consisting of soldiers, led by a capo. This is how it worked, associates who held the lowest rank in the mob paid the soldiers, the soldiers of every crew paid their respective capo, the capo paid the administration consisting of the boss, the underboss and the consigliere. Danny Boy was a loyal soldier in Pete's crew. I had known Danny Boy since I was little, he was a bit older than me and backed me up in school. When we were kids, Danny Boy, me and our little crew used to steal bikes and sell them to people in the neighborhood. As far as I could remember our neighborhood, also called Little Italy had been under control of Peteís crew. Pete took care of everybody in the neighborhood, and everybody loved him. If someone needed a job, they go to Pete, if someone needed something done, they go to Pete. Pete took care of everything. Guys like us really respected people like Pete, and wanted to be a part of what he was a part of. It felt really great, sitting here in Pete's car I know that I was going to get made. It was the only thing I had every dreamed of.

Pete stopped the car outside an old wine cellar that the boss of the family, Phil Santini owned. We were all dressed up really nice. Pete was being a bit overweight and had some problems to get out of the car, so me and Danny Boy had to help him.
"It's something wrong with the seat." Pete said since I didn't want to admit he was being overweight. "I'm sure." Danny Boy said as we helped Pete getting out. When we got inside the wine cellar everybody was already waiting for us. I hugged my old friends Brian Francesco and Carl "Armani" Ditto. The reason we called him Armani was because Carl was a real snob when it came to clothes. He was always in expensive Armani suits and was very keen about looking good. Just like Danny Boy, and soon me, Armani was a soldier in Pete's crew. Brian, on the other hand was still only an associate. He was a good earner and I was sure he was going to get made soon too.

"Can we please gather over here?" Boss Phil Santini said. Phil and Pete were standing behind a table. I was standing opposite to them at the other side of the table. Around us was all kind of members of the Pegorino Crime Family. I looked at Phil and Pete. Phil was a quite slim man in his mid sixties; he had darkgrey hair and a mustache in the same color. Pete was like I told you quite overweight, he was 58 years old, was bald at the top of the head, but still had some hair on the sides. He also had a big mustache.
"Gino, you know why you're here. If you got any doubts, now is the time to say so. Once you're in this family, there is no getting out." Phil started. "The family comes before everything, before your family and your children. It's a thing of honor." Pete continued. "Give me your hand." Phil said. I reached out my hand and Phil carefully stuck a needle into my trigger finger. Then I had to rub my hands while holding in a burning card of our family saint while I said "May I burn in hell if I betray my friends."
"Congratulations, you're now a member of this family." Phil said as everybody in the cellar started to clap their hands. It was a strong feeling, the feeling of being part of something big, something with significance. I looked at the fellow members in the cellar, I was finally one of them. After the party in the wine cellar, Danny Boy, Brian, Armani and me figured we would book a table at some nice restaurant and experience the good 'ol feelings when it just was us four. Armani knew a nice restaurant called DiMario's Kitchen, located in lower Algonquin. Hey Antonio, it's me, Armani. Listen, me and the guys are coming over and we'll like the book the fanciest table you got." Armani said on the phone while we headed down in the Booth Tunnel, leading to Algonquin. DiMario's really was a fancy place. Expensive look, expensive cars parked outside and expensive meals. Danny Boy parked his Presidente car at the parking lot next to the restaurant. Even though it was an expensive car it was still a sh*tpile compared to the other cars.

"Can I take your order please?" The waiter asked while we sat around the table. "I'm a personal friend of Antonio DiMario, he will choose our meals." Armani said. "You're paying for the meals, right Brian?" Danny Boy asked. "Why should I do that?" Brian asked like he didn't believe what he was hearing. "Well since you're the only one who still isn't made its only right you pay." Danny Boy said. I felt how my cell phone started to vibrate inside my pocket, and very soon I could hear the Godfather theme song playing, I had chosen it as my ring tone. I answered the phone, it was Pete. "Head over to the Inc right away, we got some business to take care of." Pete said and hung up. The name Inc came from Garbage Disposal Inc, our crew's main base of operations located in Fishmarket South.

THE END

Chapter 2 coming soon...

vinnygorgeous
  • vinnygorgeous

    "Crash JP Morgan buy silver"

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Apr 2009

#1070

Posted 19 June 2009 - 09:45 PM

Can other members of the gang drive any car they want, is the rule as long as you don't drive it?

Omnia sunt Communia
  • Omnia sunt Communia

    Tierra Y Libertad

  • Members
  • Joined: 12 Aug 2008
  • None

#1071

Posted 20 June 2009 - 12:11 AM

QUOTE (vinnygorgeous @ Jun 19 2009, 22:45)
Can other members of the gang drive any car they want, is the rule as long as you don't drive it?

No. The concept is that your gang does not own that vehicle unless it is listed on the front page. You are, however, allowed to include other vehicles in your story though they cannot be:
  1. driven by you;
  2. driven by any member of your gang.

In other news, I should be returning to BUYG soon. That means both rating and writing stories. I am currently debating which gang to write for thouhg.

aragond
  • aragond

    We are the Aragond. We will bury you.

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Aug 2007
  • None

#1072

Posted 20 June 2009 - 04:18 AM Edited by aragond, 20 June 2009 - 05:03 AM.

QUOTE (Jacky Fiend @ Jun 20 2009, 10:11)
In other news, I should be returning to BUYG soon. That means both rating and writing stories. I am currently debating which gang to write for thouhg.

icon14.gif icon14.gif Welcome ...er, back?
Aren't you still down as running the Gambetti Masterson St. Dry Cleaning?
Y'know, Roy Zito, Sammy Botino, and all that? You mean you're not going to finish that line of thought? Oh no! What happened to Roy? wink.gif

While we're on the topic of Italian names, and participants joining Italian gangs, regardless how reluctant I might be to spill more than I am ready to, and ... while I may be making this a bigger deal than it needs to be ... I just want to make note of names that I intend to use in the remainder of my stories ... y'know, just so there is less chance that I accidentally use someone else's character name (or they mine). I'm just being cautious.

Of course, I'm not "reserving" these names so much. I'm just saying "I've started writing weeeeeell into the future and here's some names I'm gonna use."

Giovanno 'Gino' 'Vano' Motelli, Salvatore 'Sammy' Lodioso, John 'Jackie the Lackey' Martino, Antonio 'Tony Con' Conoscetutti, Louie 'Big Lou' Clemente, Paul 'Al' 'Nino' Iacupone, Pearline, Thomas 'Blackjack' Valenti, Nicolas 'Nicky Nails' Giarizzo, Morris 'the German' Amberg, Louie 'Franny' Franchetti, Joseph 'Joey Ventura' Maruzzo, Frank 'Frankie' LaForgia, Angelo 'Angie' Peppone, John 'lead pipe' Pucillo, Joseph 'JoeL', 'Squilibrato' Lipari, Vincent 'Slugger' Scarcarell, Vincent 'Vinny the gun' Bucossi, Thomas 'Double-T' Turrisi, Jason 'Jay-Jay' Johns, Leo Torini, Don Pegorino, Antonio 'Mad Tony' Folle, Gaetano 'Doc' Cirillo, Joseph 'Joey G' 'Dove' Genovese, Anthony 'Tony Bells' Campanello, Nicholas 'Nikki' 'Whitey' Tramunti, Daniel 'Danny the Brains' Grilleto, Giuseppe 'Trigger Joe' Grilleto, Gerardo 'Fat Jerry' Grilleto, Samuzzo 'Switchblade Sam' Basile, Donato 'Donny scars' Scarimbolo, Salvatore 'Sally Squints' Biancolino, Paul 'Paulie Pazzit' Lastortino, Dino 'Gaspipe' Cenatiempo, Philip 'Hatchet' Gurino, Bernardo 'Biggs' Verpucci, Michael 'Mikey' Kelly. Yes, there's 39 of them, all with back-stories. (Hey, I did say I'd started writing into the future.) Please, now that you've read them, forget them.

Obviously, there'll be a few more yet to come, but I'll try keep to posting the new names in the postscript of my story-entries. And, in time, I might do a post like Rucke did to tell you a little about these people. Gotta introduce most of them first. colgate.gif

And, while, a mere two parts published, it's a big premature to think people are wondering where my third part to chapter one is ... I'll over-enthusiastically report, yes, Part 3 is coming ... biggrin.gif ... soon as I figure out how to make a hundred lines of straight dialogue interesting!! confused.gif


(some time later)
Awwwwlright, IF you insist, I'll tack on a "here's what's been" at the end of my post. [rolls-eyes] tounge2.gif

The last ratings were on Monday (or Sunday, depending on your timezone) and the following has happened in the WHOLE five days since then:
  • Rucke still needed his sixth chapter for the Spanish Lords rated.
  • Osric posted his third chapter for the Petrovic Bratva.
  • Osric then asked to purchase a Combat Pistol.
  • StrappedEnd posted his fourth chapter Parts one and two for the North Holland Hustlers.
  • aragond posted his second partof his first episode of the first series of Family Rising wink.gif , aka the Pegorinos.
  • Rucke, acting as staff, granted ScratchCard a stay-of-execution (or punitive-monetary-deduction) over his illegal use of the red sabre on account of him 'fessing up as soon as he realised it.
  • ScratchCard then posted his second and third chapter for the Albanian Mob.
  • Rucke decided, after six stories for the Spanish Lords, to return to what he'd done best for an astonishing 40 stories: the Pegorinos. He's now registered at the Garbage Disposal Inc. He then posted his Inaugural chapter for his second series with the Pegorinos.
  • aragond, watching a bunch of new names, that verged close to his, appear in Rucke's new work, panicked and pre-empted any possibility of accidentally using someone else's names by posting all those he'd written about in yet-to-be-published stories.

Any errors? You know where to find me!

vinnygorgeous
  • vinnygorgeous

    "Crash JP Morgan buy silver"

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Apr 2009

#1073

Posted 20 June 2009 - 11:38 AM

I have a notebook full of characters with back ground/ positions etc, it never occurred to me that I might have to post them to prove I am not stealing from other people. If you use real Italian names surely overlap is to be expected, same with Nicknames the mob re-uses its nicknames, how many Fat Tonys have there been. I use the list for reference so I don't get confused and maintain continuity with characters, so they don't change location or occupation or name even, I guess my question is, is it frowned upon to do character background lists or are they welcome?

ScratchCard
  • ScratchCard

    Arc.

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Mar 2009

#1074

Posted 20 June 2009 - 12:17 PM

Seeing as I'm pretty much the only active writer for the Albanian's I'm gonna skip that.

WelcomeToLibertyCity
  • WelcomeToLibertyCity

    City of Angels

  • Members
  • Joined: 26 Aug 2008

#1075

Posted 20 June 2009 - 12:23 PM

Well I think I'm going to try BUYG IV again. I'm going to join the M.O.B. at Outlook Pay 'N' Spray. I'm not sure how often I'll get stories in though. My old story count should be saved.

spdrlfc
  • spdrlfc

    Playa

  • BUSTED!
  • Joined: 09 Mar 2008

#1076

Posted 20 June 2009 - 01:10 PM

i would like to join stienway beer garden please?

ScratchCard
  • ScratchCard

    Arc.

  • Members
  • Joined: 20 Mar 2009

#1077

Posted 20 June 2009 - 05:23 PM

Any chance we'll be getting ratings soon?

liam.
  • liam.

    Non-Stop Pop FM & Mirror Park Radio <3

  • Members
  • Joined: 24 Nov 2001

#1078

Posted 20 June 2009 - 06:55 PM

Writing for the M.O.B. was too hard. Can I switch over to the Irish Mob? But, I have to write five stories for the M.O.B. first, right? Because I have a chapter at ready, if needed.


Rucke
  • Rucke

    Gangsta

  • Members
  • Joined: 01 Aug 2007

#1079

Posted 20 June 2009 - 07:06 PM

QUOTE (evog @ Jun 20 2009, 19:55)
Writing for the M.O.B. was too hard. Can I switch over to the Irish Mob? But, I have to write five stories for the M.O.B. first, right? Because I have a chapter at ready, if needed.

Yeah that's right.

@ScratchCard: I don't know, I hoped some of the other mods would rate this time. We'll see.

Rucke
  • Rucke

    Gangsta

  • Members
  • Joined: 01 Aug 2007

#1080

Posted 21 June 2009 - 03:08 PM

Pegorino Crime Family
Chapter 2: You buy protection you get extortion for free

Danny Boy and me approached the main gate of the Inc. A chubby guard dressed in a orange working jacket walked toward us. Danny Boy winded down his car window and said the password. The guard walked back into his stall and opened the gate. Pete's crew had controlled this garbage disposal as far as I could remember. When I was little and my father, who also was in the mob had some business down here, he used to let me play around at the yard. The guys working at the Inc used to give me a couple of cents, which was a lot of money back then. They did it to prove their loyalty against my father and Pete. Danny Boy stopped the car right outside the backdoor. The backdoor led directly to the office, which meant that we didn't have to cross the disposal area. The stink there was terrible. Inside the office Pete was playing cards together with Frank Caridi, an elderly soldier in our crew, and Jon Hamilton, the corrupt owner of Inc. The office contained a nice wooden bar, a table where card games and meetings took place, a big plasma TV and a gun locker. The walls and floor inside the office was made in the same material as the bar. What I liked best with the office was that we had a nice view over the whole facility.

"Hey boys, we've just started a card game. Sit down, join us." Pete said with a cigar in his mouth. Pete was a heavy smoker, ever since I was a small kid Pete had been smoking cigars. He claimed that it was a part of the whole wiseguy lifestyle, but I stayed with my cigarettes. "Nah we need to go out and make us some money. You said you might have a job for us." I said to Pete. "You know that our crew has controlled the protection rackets in Fashmarket South and Little Italy for over 40 years. Well some people have forgotten this and they don't pay me anymore money. Deal with this." Pete said. "You got it, which stores has stopped paying?" I asked. "Dela Deli and the Pasta, Pizza Restaurant around the corner of Drusilla's." Pete answered with a big sigh. "Here take these, it might get a bit messy." Pete said and reached for two baseball bats which he gave to me and Danny Boy.

On our way to Dela Deli I swinged around with the bat while sitting in Danny Boy's car. Just like I loved to feel the weight of a gun, I loved to feel the weight of a bat. I could see how Danny Boy got more and more annoyed by what I was doing. "Come on Gino, do you really have to swing around with every weapon you hold in?" Danny Boy said and looked at me like I was crazy. He didn't mean anything by it though, we had been friends in our entire life. The last costumers had just left Dela Deli when we arrived. It was a nice little place with all kinds of Italian delicacies. They had everything from spicy meatballs to manicotti. They owner called Sonny was a respected business man in the neighborhood, everybody loved his cooking. Danny Boy and me knocked at the front door of Dela Deli. Very soon I noticed Sonny's familiar face at the other side of the glass. He had a grey mustache and grey hair.

"Gino, Danny Boy, what are you boys doing here? I'm closing the shop for today." Old man Sonny said and let us inside. "We've noticed that you're not paying anymore protection, Pete is getting upset about it." I said. "We also know that you are a respected businessman in the neighborhood and we don't want to hurt you. Just start paying the protection money again." Danny Boy said and clapped old man Sonny on his back. Sonny looked at the floor and seemed embarrassed. Old guys like him took this protection thing very serious and it was clearly that he was ashamed of himself. He looked up at me and said "Tell Pete it won't happened again, and if there is anything else I can do for him just let me know."

Danny Boy and me said goodbye to Sonny and headed for our next stop, the Pasta Pizza Restaurant around the corner of Drusilla's. This place became a costumer of Pete last year and since when it had been nothing but trouble with them. They were late with the protection money about ten times and one time they treated us by going to police. Pete loved old man Sonny, but with these people it was different. We had to teach them some respect. When Danny Boy stopped his car outside the restaurant we both grabbed our baseball bats. The place had two big windows overlooking the small roads of Little Italy. I walked to the left of the two windows, I swinged my bat towards the glass. Glass splinter was all over the ground when I was finished with the window. I checked on Danny Boy and he was done with the other window. We got back into his car. Now we had sent a clear message to the owners of the restaurant and I would get surprised if they still didn't pay us. If they didn't the next step was to burn up the joint for good. Brian and Armani were waiting for us in a small alley in Chinatown.

"Did it work out for you guys?" Armani asked once we had parked up in the alley. Brian and Armani had beat up some protection costumers as well. "Yeah old man Sonny will probably start paying again, I don't know about that other place." I said. "Brian, go back to the Inc and tell Pete that we are done." Danny Boy demanded Brian. "Why do I always have to do these things?" Brian asked. "We've already discussed it, you're not a made man unlike us, now go." Danny Boy said. "Hey Gino, you coming for a beer?" Armani asked. "No I catch up with you guys later." I said. I had other plans for tonight. I had to go and see my father who lived back in the neighborhood. The poor guy had been sitting in a wheelchair since five years back. A guy in the crew named Richard Maranzana once had a beef with my father and ran him over with his car. A policeman who saw this arrested Ricky, as we used to call him. He got five years, which meant he was getting out soon. When he did I had a surprise for him. No way I would let this man get away with this. My father was watching some TV when I came inside his apartment.

"Is that you Gino? Come on inside my boy." My father, named Leonardo said, but everybody who knew him called him Leo.
"Hey dad how you feelin'?" I said and sat down next to him on his couch. "Ah, what can I say, I'm feeling alright." My father said. "Because you know Ricky Maranzana is getting out soon. Iím thinking about making a surprise for him." I said. "Does Pete know about it?" My father asked. "Not yet but I'll talk to him tomorrow." My father started to look tired and I decided to go. I looked at him. He was almost bald, had grey hair and big wide frames around his glasses. No way Ricky Maranzana would get away with doing this to him. "Take care of yourself now." I said and leaved.

END

Chapter 3 coming soon...






1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users