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LCS Chain Story

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EDGE_SHOT
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#841

Posted 28 October 2009 - 10:50 PM

QUOTE (Master Mind @ Oct 28 2009, 22:03)
1- To Sal mansion and an alliance take place

Now it's the "10.000 Leones" gang (3000 Leones + 7000 other guys).

Knowing about this, the Sindacco join the Forelli and the Yakuza to make a 10.000 guys gang too.

So, Sal calls Toni at VC for help to make the group a "10.001 gang"

Toni takes a plane back to LC and brings with him:

1-the "harwood butcher" Tommy Vercetti.
2-Vic Vance.

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#842

Posted 28 October 2009 - 11:12 PM

Vic Vance



At Sal mansion now we are the "10.002" gang



1- Then they plan a strike plan
2- Then they do something (That You Choose Dude)

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#843

Posted 29 October 2009 - 01:12 AM

Vic suggests they call Phill Cassidy for some "heavy artillery". Phill gets them:

7000 M16's
3000 M60's
3 Rhinos for Toni, Sal and Mickey
and
1 Hunter for Vic.

Then they go to the war with the Forelli/Sindacco/Yakuza gang at:

1-Portland Harbor
2-The ruins of Fort Staunton
3-Francis int. Airport.

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#844

Posted 29 October 2009 - 01:50 AM

Portland Harbor



The battle start pretty well for Sal "army"



At the end they...



1- Win
2- Loose

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#845

Posted 29 October 2009 - 08:36 PM

Well done guys, bringing this place back.

They win, but most of the vehicles get damaged or destroyed.

"Well, we've lost only a few men," Sal says back at his mansion.

"Its too hot for me at the moment, I gotta get out of here," Vic says.Toni drops him off at the airport, but on the way back
1 Some of he Leones new "allies" try to shoot him
2 The Yakuza ambush him at the elevator bridge
3 He eats some chicken strips

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#846

Posted 30 October 2009 - 12:07 AM

QUOTE (iamanevilbastard @ Oct 29 2009, 20:36)
2 The Yakuza ambush him at the elevator bridge

And, *SHOCK*, Claude is with them (yes, I'm bringing another GTA protagonist to LCS again, so what? tounge.gif ) and tells Toni (through gestures, of course) that they should run LC themselfs instead of taking orders from others.

Toni says:

1-"I agreed. let's kill all those bastards, just me and you"
2-"I agreed. let's make our own gang"
3-"f*ck you! i'm not a traitor." and they engage in a brutal sword fight at the bridge under a rain storm.

Hope it's creative enough. colgate.gif

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#847

Posted 30 October 2009 - 02:10 AM

I agreed. let's make our own gang



Then they find a hideout and start recruiting peoples. Sal not really pleased to hear that so he send hebcmen after them but to have in return their heads by mail.


1- 1 months later they are ready and make their first real move
2- They extort buiseness and kill gang members

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#848

Posted 01 November 2009 - 01:20 AM

2- They extort buiseness and kill gang members
pretty half arsed but its a start. but then toni and claude have a falling out on how to make money. toni doesn't wanna kill leones, but claude does. they fight, and toni scratches claudes face. it feels like rubber. "what the hell?" he says. Its a mask! "Claude" is an undercover copper! Toni punches him out and takes out a glock. theres a swat team outside, armed with M4s and grendes. Toni
1 surrenders
2 sneaks out the bakc and goes to sal to apologize
3 turns dog and rats out a few guys to avoid prison

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#849

Posted 01 November 2009 - 06:27 AM

surrenders


After an interrogation he get in his cell, in jail.


Then...

1-Someone make him get out (Good way)
2- He manage to flee

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#850

Posted 01 November 2009 - 09:46 AM

QUOTE (Master Mind @ Nov 1 2009, 06:27)
1-Someone make him get out (Good way)

Toni sat inside the escort car, with his rescuer driving whilst he sits his arse in the back. He tapped the driver's shoulder.
"Hey man, I appreciate you bailing me out. Who are you though? Did Sal send you?"
The car braked.
"Uhhh.."
The driver turned around, revealing an unfamiliar face, then a gun appeared from behind the driver's seat. Why, it was Toni's .357! He could've used that a while ago with his extorting business. That's when it occurred to Toni that he wasn't carrying his own, oh noes! The driver sensed his upset.
"Don't worry sir, this is your Magnum. I just wanted to give it to you, but I'm not allowed to give gun to prisoners so I had to bail you out first."
Toni got handed the gun, so of course he...

- Shot the driver

- Orgasmed

- Threatened the driver to do something

- Slapped his knee and laughed so hard that LCS chain story became the most popular thread in GTAF and everyone joined in, so Toni felt gang raped and made a blog on the internet about his sh*tty life that no one wants to read. Oh, and the driver inflates.

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#851

Posted 02 November 2009 - 08:08 PM

Jordy! (insert emotional greeting) Yeh back!
Orgasmed. All over the seat. "Dude, not in my f*cking car!" The driver whnged, so Toni put one in his head. Blood and brains covered the windshield and dash, so h takes the guys wallet and watch and throws the body away. He shoots the windshield and it shatters. As he drives off
1 A copper sees the body
2 A Yakuza hitman tracks him down
3 He has a sudden craving for chicken strips

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#852

Posted 02 November 2009 - 08:32 PM

QUOTE (iamanevilbastard @ Nov 2 2009, 20:08)
2 A Yakuza hitman tracks him down

He drives to Portland Beach at full speed and baills off in the last second. when the Yakuza hitmen catchs up he thinks Toni drowned and leaves. Toni heads to his Portland sh*t hole...err... I mean, safehouse, sits in the bed, sighs and say: "I'm tired of this. I need to change my life". and then he...

1-Joins an "ex-mafia" rehab group.
2-Says "bah! f*ck this! I wanna kill people", grabs a flamethrower and starts incinerating people.
3-Grabs his phone and orders a pizza from "Papa's 12 inchs" in Staunton.

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#853

Posted 02 November 2009 - 08:42 PM

2-Says "bah! f*ck this! I wanna kill people", grabs a flamethrower and starts incinerating people.
"Thats better, how could I ever think fo quitting?" He says to himself after losing the cops. Then he orders a 12 inch pizza from Papas 12 Inches. Sitting there eating, he notices a commotion outside the pizza shop. Theres this massive brawl going on between the Forellis and Yakuza.
1 He helps one side, your choice which
2 Kills them all
3 Eats more pizza..but then they notice him and try to mob him

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#854

Posted 03 November 2009 - 02:29 PM

QUOTE (iamanevilbastard @ Nov 2 2009, 20:42)
3 Eats more pizza..but then they notice him and try to mob him

"hey! HEY! I'm eating! respect a men's meal!" Toni says. then he says: "hey, are you guys hungry? why don't we order some more pizzas, some noodles for you, Yakuza guys and go have a pic-nic on Belleville Park, huh?" "yeah, why not?" they say looking at each others. they head to the park, on the way the Sindaccos join them too (they love pizza), then the Yardies ask to go too, and they bring some weed. then a bunch of Triads delivering the noodles join too. and Toni decides to call the Diablos.

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#855

Posted 03 November 2009 - 02:31 PM

(sorry for double posting)

They bring the Cartel with them and some burritos and nachos. they all eat and drink all day, then:

1-They get drunk, tell jokes about each others and engage in fist fights.
2-Suddenly, they all get a 6 stars wanted level and (you continue from here)
3-Toni says he needs to go to the bathroom, grabs the molotovs there and starts incinerating all gang members.

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#856

Posted 03 November 2009 - 09:23 PM

1-They get drunk, tell jokes about each others and engage in fist fights.

So yeah, just your average party. ONLY, the Colombians get pissed when Toni bashes one of them.
"F*ck this!" One yells and pulls his Uzi. He shoots about twelve people dead and everyone else pulls their guns. Thing is, Toni forgot his, so he runs.
"Hold on who organised this?" A Yakuza guy asks. He sees Toni. "Thats the guy!" So
1 SOmeone shoots him and the gunfight continues
2 Everyone chases Toni
3 They all congratulate him for a wicked party

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#857

Posted 03 November 2009 - 10:07 PM

Someone shoots him and the gunfight continues. A stray bullet ricochets off a mirror, and zooms straight into to Toni's ar...m.
"f*cking oweeeeeee!" screamed Toni, clenching his arm.
Toni had recently had a new tattoo of a woman bending over on his arm. Now, she has a huge gaping asshole. With blood. And about 3 long hairs. With a--
"OKAY, ENOUGH ALREADY!", yelled one of the Columbians. "He's on the floor squealing and sh*tting himself, now let's tie him up and...

1. "Roast him!"

2. "Molest him"

3. "Interrogate him!"

4. "Draw on him!"

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#858

Posted 04 November 2009 - 01:01 AM

2. "Molest him"

"who's first?" says one of the Columbians while puting Toni's pants down. "Oh, oh! me! ME!" screams someone in the middle of the Diablos. it's... El Burro! panic.gif

Then:

1-El Burro starts... well, you know... "molesting him". and Toni starts screaming "hey! hey... that... feels good, to be honest".

2-Sal and all the Leones enter the park armed with M4's and Sal yells "I won't let no one molest a Leone".

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#859

Posted 04 November 2009 - 04:26 AM

hey tom, been a while, hows it been
2-Sal and all the Leones enter the park armed with M4's and Sal yells "I won't let no one molest a Leone".
But Toni doesnt want to be left alone by EB. Sal spews...all over a Leone. "WHAT THE F*CK!" he yells. He get really pissed and starts shooting. All the others think that it looks really fun to murder people, so they join in. Pretty soon, most of the gangsters are dead and Toni and El Buro have finished. So now
1 Toni goes to drink until the part of his brain which remembers things forgets what just happenned
2 Sal and Toni argue about molestering people
3 El Burro rings Toni

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#860

Posted 16 November 2009 - 07:52 PM

QUOTE (iamanevilbastard @ Nov 4 2009, 04:26)
3 El Burro rings Toni

"Toni speaking, so watch your mouth."
"Ooooh, big man."
"What?"
"What?"
Toni frowns into the phone's speaker. "Don't play me around man, who the f*ck is this?"
"El Burro. El for Electroshock to the balls, Burro for the place I'm gonna ditch your mutilated body."
He nodded in agreement. "Very clever." Toni admitted.
"Gracias! I tried it on some guy at the store and he sh*t himself. Too bad it don't work on you mafia types either, eh?"
Checking his soiled pants, Toni shook his head. "Yeah er, no sh*t coming from me man."
"Good, hopefully you meant that metaphorically too."
"Sure. What do you want?"
There was a pause. "Your gun."
Toni's stomach suddenly dropped. "W-which one?"
"The jizz-cannon. The horny trigger for the wigger. The 6 barreled dildo." Toni dreaded his nicknames and what they were detonating. "The .357 Magnum. I f*cking want it."
Toni choked. "You'll erm, you'll have to catch it first!" El Burro hung up. He returned his cell phone to his back pocket, forgetting about the mass sh*t he spewed out in there, when suddenly..

- An attack helicopter shows up

- El Burro comes with a car battery and some clips, ready to molest.

- A girl approaches Toni.

- He slapped his knee and laughed so hard that the sh*t in his pants turned to rocket fuel, so he strikes a light and the fuel ignites, causing him to launch into the air and crash into a plane containing Kanye West sucking off Soulja Boy.

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#861

Posted 18 November 2009 - 10:07 AM

- A girl approaches Toni. They start to make out, but she's he!

"El Burro!" Toni yells. "You bastard!" El Burro laughs and knocks him out. He then takes him to a parked car in an alley way near the ferry station. "Wake up balls-mouth!" A voice said. A couple of Diablos wake Toni up and uncuff him. "Kneel down!" One says, pulling a gun. Toni just thinks "f*ck that" and elbows him in the throat. He takes the gun and shoots them both. He then
1 Shoves his member in the .357's barrel
2 Hunts down El Burro
3 Eats some spaghetti over the fallen bodies

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#862

Posted 18 January 2010 - 01:36 AM

BUMP

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#863

Posted 08 February 2010 - 08:52 PM

ARRROOGA-BOOGA-WOOGA!

Hunts down El Burro. Toni is like a wolf when it comes to hunting. He will plan his attack. Then he will strike. Once he has striked, there is no runni-- oooh lordy, is that the time? Better crack on.
Toni manages to catch a train to El Burro's place and storms through his window.
"WAHDAFOOK? HOW U NO WERE I BEE?", shouted El Burrito.
"You're...predictable."
"Well, y dah fook u cum fru mah weendow!?"
"Cuz.. I R LEIK JAK BAUER! AND JEMZ BOND! I LUV DAH ACSHUN MUVIES!"
"No! u r leik Toni Caprielli or wutever ur name be. u r teh suck.
"Suck your mum's tattooed fanny plaits!" Toni came back.
"Go shuv ur dik fru a straw!"
And the dissing battle goes on and on and on UNTIL...

1. A sausage on a stick uses El Burro's bathroom.

2. Toni erupts with a huge comeback which burns El Burro's eyebrows to a crisp.

3. El Burro's dog slaps his knee so hard that a bumblebee symphony pops out of
Toni's ass and performs a 5 star performance.

4. El Burro runs off again.


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#864

Posted 10 February 2010 - 09:45 PM

QUOTE (tomtom555 @ Feb 8 2010, 20:52)
1. A sausage on a stick uses El Burro's bathroom.

"Hey, puto!" El Spicy Burrito Yelled. "You can't go in there! I don't want no sausage meat in my spanish and or mexican toilet!"
The sausge on a stick glared at him. "PFFFT"
Toni didn't like this one bit. "Maaaan f*ck dis sheet ah'm outta here getting away frum teh queer."
So Toni..

- Backflipped out the window

- Realised no one heard what he said and decided to just stay put

- Opened the bathroom door politely for the sausage

- Slapped his knee and laughed so hard that a girl came into the room to announce f*cking Toni during January, so Toni marries the bitch but then realises she lied and that he never even met her, so he filmed the sequel to 1 man 1 jar

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#865

Posted 10 February 2010 - 09:57 PM

Realised no one heard what he said and decided to just stay put.
'Chinga tu madre, pendejo!'
'...k,' Toni says. 'I'm off out. Should be back later.'
'Er! No! You have to kill me remember?'
'Can't a man grab some food?'
'You're staying here.'
'The f*ck? You don't own me!'
'FINE! PISS OFF, YOU FUGLY PIECE OF ITALIAN SPAGHETTI!'
'f*ck you, you knobheaded arse-wrenching spicy taco.'
Toni quickly grabs a crab-ridden 357. from his arsehole.
'Ow.'
Toni then shoots El Burro in the kneecap and walks casually up to him.
'You really think I would leave without planting a bullet in your f*ckin' empty head?'
'Well.. yeah!' El Burro shouts in pain.
'Right. I'll spare your sorry ass for now cuz I gots to do some shop-da-whopping!'

Toni carefully places his 357. back in its rightful home. Lovely warm Italian ass. Yum.
Toni steps outside and the sausage on a stick barges past Toni. He then...

1. Spots a quarter on the floor and picks it up.
2. Lights a Molotov and throws it over the road. f*ck knows why.
3. Heads to the shops in Portland and sees...

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#866

Posted 17 February 2010 - 12:05 AM

HOLY F*CK. ITS ALIVE!

3. Heads to the shops in Portland and sees...
The damn sausage guy. Cant a guy shop in peace? The sausage guy pulls his gun. "Time to die sonabitch!" He says in this cheesy arse italian accent. Toni pulls his sawn off shot gun. Another leone sees the standoff, recognizes toni and sneaks up behind the sausage guy with HIS shotgun. They kill the sausage guy, blowing boiling hot, saturated fat everywhere. Then
1 El Burro comes to kill Toni
2 The leone and Toni have an argument about who killed the sausage guy. Toni gets p!ssed off and kills the leone.
3 Salvatore calls Toni.

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#867

Posted 13 April 2010 - 02:47 AM

3 Salvatore calls Toni.
and says that he's in big trouble and Toni needs to get to his(Sal's) house right away. Toni goes and sees
1 Salvatore standing over Maria's dead body
2 Salvatore's house burnt down, but no sign of Salvatore
3 Salvatore's house surrounded by Yakuza

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#868

Posted 14 April 2010 - 10:33 AM

Salvatore standing over Maria's dead body.
'Holy f*ck, Sal! What did you do to her!?
'I..it's not easy for me to say this..I..choked her..'
'Ohh, you been cooking that spicy bean sauce again?'
'Yeah haha.. no! I been ramming that cock in her mouth again, ain't I?
'Oh jeez, Sal. You know she can't take 80yr old knobcheese.'
'..Wait, wut?'
'Y'know.. mature knobcheese.'
'Oh. Yeah.'
Toni kneels down beside Maria's corpse. She suddenly twitches as Toni places his hand in a naughty area.
'What..the f*ck do you think you're doing!?' Maria shouts, spitting cum everywhere.
'I..he..that..I was only..' Toni stuttered.
'Maria! Oh, I'm so glad your okay!' Sal shouts happily.
'Dad. Your birthday gift for me was.. not expected.'

1. Sal erupts with rage yelling all sorts of crude words under the sun.
2. Toni places his hand back down her zebra textured undies.
3. Maria takes out a massive ring and says to Sal what kinda gift he shoulda gave her.
4. Maria farts and a pineapple in a 3-wheeled shopping trolley squeaks past.

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#869

Posted 24 June 2010 - 02:17 AM

Toni drives off the cliff to the beach. However the car goes in th water toni and sal get out and think there screwed but there is a boat next to them they get in and drive away trying to get to portland ferry station but the cops are on their tail sal drives and toni takes out a shotgun from the boat and shoots police boats chasing. They destroy all the boats but a police maverick comes and destroys the boat toni and sal jump into the water thinking their screwed again but their is a rock next to them they get on so they dont drown. the helicopter drops SWAT units who have smgs does toni and sal..
1. jump in the water and try to swim but fail
2. kill all the cops and get on the rope used to drop the cops and hijack the helicopter

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#870

Posted 25 July 2010 - 04:50 PM

lol, forget that last post. cant believe this thread is dead. it should be continued... yawn.gif




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